So I'll just do a little bit on what's going on with me. So I'm at the moment it's been difficult. I found that because you know, everything going on at the moment, it feels kind of bleak, and I think a lot of it is is that I'm seeing a lot more of myself. And I'm getting to know myself and a lot more and I think that's been challenging. Because I feel like I've come a long way in lots of ways but there are little things that still get to me. Yeah, one of my main things is kind of how my body looks specifically my stomach. I really struggle with that. And when I because the thing is I not big in the way of say what a lot of people might think was big but I've got my stomach sags and it's uncomfortable and I genuinely won't like my boyfriend to see it. And I just say to him, please look away. I don't mind here because he's seen them now or is he? Oh, but I just say, Please don't look at it because it just hangs and it looks horrible for me, and the thing is, I'm trying to be less mean to it. Because my, my, you know, the abuser guy, he would make comments about it poker and like, just generally be a dick about it. And I think a lot of my hangups with little parts of my body, or big parts of my body are because of stuff he said. And I mean, I haven't, I broke up with him. I'm 28 now and work out when I was 23. So it's been a long time, but it's still got the scars that are still there. And I think, because he would always make out the bigger people weren't people that were kind of worthy of a lot of respect. Because he'd sort of say that, you know, because of the whole, I don't back to you, or I won't, people won't fancy you. So you know, I'll just keep reviewing, you know, just as a favor to you. Even though it was non consensual, he would still sort of say, well, I think that, you know, I'll just do this for you. You know, he's such a charity guy. Um, so yes, that was, that was one of the things that's kind of been difficult for me. And also, because I've been in the My relationship with my boyfriend for two years now. And, you know, the whole onslaught, and especially when you're heading towards 30, the whole questions of when are you getting married, when you having kids, and all those fun questions. And I kind of, in my head, I'm thinking, so when I get married, I'm going to be slim. Like, I know that, like, that's my little picture in my head, like, I've got it, I've got my Pinterest board, and I don't fit in with a Pinterest person that I've got. And I'm now trying to get my head around the fact that because I think it's mental when you actually think about losing weight for one day, and then you go on your honeymoon, and then like gain it all back. It's mad thinking that that's going to make you happy. And I get that people do it because they want the good photos. But also is that representative of your true self, which is why I struggle with because I'm like the thing is, I've got a lot of common sense, and I'm very logical, but I do you feel like I deal with two versions of myself. I deal with the emotional meaty one. And then the one that's like, that's ridiculous that you just want to lose weight for one day. But I can't always get that into my head. Like it doesn't stick. That's like another major thing.