Oh yeah, I'm so excited. Hi everyone. Today I'm going to kind of say a lot of things you've already heard. I think that that shows great alignment in this group, that we all know the power of empathy. And I'm just going to say it all again in a different way, because I really want to talk about how I use empathetic reflection at home and at work. So empathy, for me, is way more than a buzzword. It is a skill that transforms our relationships, our teams, and, most importantly, ourselves. We just talked about how it's the inner work that gets that external result right. So today I want to dive into empathetic reflections, a powerful tool from the empathy circles that I use every day, every day. It's the kind of tool that can make your parenting from chaotic to connecting. It can take your family from conversations that are passive aggressive to productive, and it can take your leadership from okay ish to absolutely magnetic, whether it is helping my child make sense of his emotions, guiding my family through meaningful meaning, meaningful conversations, or coaching leaders to foster trust and understanding within their teams, empathy, reflection has proven indispensable, the ultimate brain hack for connection. At its core, empathetic reflection is about actively listening and mirroring back what someone is expressing. It's not about agreeing or solving. It's about creating a space where people feel really and truly heard. Right from a neuroscience perspective, reflecting someone's emotions activates that mirror neuron when we these, are these specialized brain cells that help us understand and resonate with others in their experience. You see this in smiling. It's called the duchen Smile. I know that sounds dirty. That's just the scientists name. Okay, so Doctor Duchin discovered a mirror feedback loop in our brain that when somebody smiles with their eyes and their mouth at the same time, it activates the part of the brain that says, Oh, we must be happy, make happy juice. And then that contracts that muscles around your eyes and your mouth, which then tells your brain, oh, we must be happy, make happy juice. But because it's also a mirror neuron, a monkey see monkey do situation when I smile with both my eyes and my mouth, your face tests it to see if it's a genuine smile. But since it is now, you're smiling with your eyes and your mouth, and your brain is saying, Oh, we must be happy. Make happy juice. Empathetic reflection is how we do that and create a safe space where people feel truly heard with just listening and zero activity. It is the most active, non active activity that you can do so that mirror neuro the specialized brain cells that let us resonate with each other when we reflect what we hear, it's not just being polite. We are actually engaging another person's brain in a way that promotes connection and trust. Never else might like, yeah, sorry. Cut. Cut distracted by their comments, for instance, okay, if a colleague shares their frustration about a product instead of jumping in with advice, you might say sounds like you're feeling a little overwhelmed, because the timeline feels tight, that little moment of recognition activates their brains reward centers, releasing dopamine and reinforcing that positive feeling of being understood, which soothes the brain fully bunches. But let me talk about, on a personal level, how I use this at home, parenting is where empathetic reflection shines. My son, like most kids, struggles occasionally with articulating his feelings. He's four, so you know, there's a limited bandwidth for words, and when I reflect his emotions and our shared reality, I give him language for his inner world. Neuroscience backs us up when we reflect a child's feelings, it helps regulate their amygdala, the part of the brain responsible for emotional responses. This calms their stress and allows the prefrontal cortex, or adulty adult, to step in and the brain's decision making center to engage in what is going on. For example, when my son is upset for having a bad day, I might say it's. Sounds. I hear frustration. It sounds like something didn't go the way that you wanted or expected. And that reflection not only validates his emotion, but it helps him develop an emotional intelligence by linking words to feelings. I do this in our family meetings. Empathetic reflection sets the tone for all of our conversations before we dive into any of the logistics that needs to get handled, like chores, we take turns reflecting each other's top thoughts and feelings. It's it's like clearing the static so the signal comes through crystal clear. It totally lowers our cholesterol or cortisol. Cholesterol, cortisol, the stress hormone and so there's no flipping of tables when we get into discussions at my household. In my work as an executive coach, empathy reflection. Empathetic reflection isn't optional. It is absolutely essential. It is the best hack I have found for leaders, period, bar none. Leaders often feel the weight of expectation, and when they get that reflected back with their words and their emotions, they feel seen, and that allows them to process challenges more effectively. It creates a sense of psychological safety, a concept that was pioneered by neuroscientist Amy Edmondson, who calls it the secret sauce for high performing teams. It's brilliant, but it doesn't just stop there. I teach that to my leaders to use empathetic reflection with their teams. When leader demonstrates empathy, it boosts oxytocin levels, enhancing team cohesion and trust. One of my executives told me that this one he started putting this into his one on one meetings, and instead of rushing through tasks, they started reflecting on what they heard. It sounds like you're feeling stuck because of x. And the result was that his team was more engaged and more motivated. They found it easier to solve problems. But don't just use empathetic reflection for conflict. Use it when things are going well too. Reflecting someone's excitement, their pride, their enjoyment, it reinforces that connections and keeps that momentum running strong. I don't know where I'm on type. I just got excited. Think we do it. Okay, yeah, we're doing it. Okay. Empathetic reflection works, and not just because we feel it and we experience in the science says it, but it meets a human, universal human need, the need to be heard, to be seen. When we reflect back someone's words and feelings, we activate the brain social bonding mechanisms. It builds trust. It strengthens relationships. It fosters collaboration. Rewiring our brains, their brains, the brain for connection and collaboration. Studies at UCLA highlight that labeling emotions, specifically naming them decreases activity or calms our amygdala and enhances cognitive processing. So in other words, empathetic reflection isn't just nice or kind. It's neurologically efficient and productive. And for a spicy twist, when you practice empathetic reflection consistently, your brain benefits too. So not only are you helping the other person, have that connection, have that calming amygdala experience, but you're experiencing those things. You become more attuned, less reactive, better equipped to handle stress. Empathy isn't just a gift you give, it's a muscle that you build. So I would invite everyone to bring empathetic reflection into your life and and everywhere. Start small. Use it at home tonight. Try empathetic reflection today with your partner, with your team shoot. Use it with the barista who looks like they're about to lose it with the holiday rush, and just reflect back what they are outwardly sharing to the world. Train yourself to understand first, before responding, before reacting, before needing to fix, remember, you're not just listening. You're rewiring connection, creating trust at a DNA brain level and foster and grow. Thank you for letting me share my journey with empathetic reflection with all of you today, and I can't wait to keep hearing what everyone has to say.