Initiation of the priestx of the order of Syncretic Hermetic Spiritualism

6:42AM Sep 23, 2024

Speakers:

Riordan Regan

Cain

Eve

Keywords:

medicine

syncretic

syncretism

traditions

open

combining

archetypes

trans

part

hermetic

initiate

possessed

calling

emergence

started

shamanic initiation

story

reframe

broke

knowing

It's part of the process I'm creating, building on kids scholarship and practice and the ancestral lineages and traditions they represented and carried their inherited ancestry. Now a part of me I drawing upon the ancestral wisdom of all the traditions that we're channeling and embodying, both through our DNA and through our honoring, is this process of combining this is inherent to the trans archetype, the thing that's emerging, it's all about mixing and combining. The kaikeyon was a mixture Soma, the elixir, the psychedelic beer that started my whole journey. It's always been about mixing, remixing, remixing the emergence is the scope with which we can do it in trans dimensional bringing in all the wisdom at once from all places, times and people. So my process brings in this psychedelic practice, which is part of the ancestral traditions, and this is where Darren's scholarship comes in and can inform kids and combine with it. And, yeah, but it's also the Shulgin tradition. Fuck around and find out. It's also Leary and Albert and the Harvard's little Simon project. It's also the witches and the herbalists. It's the Celtics tradition. It's the ecstatic worshiping in the forest. It's always been about combining things. It's cacao and the coastal peoples coming together with those of the rainforest.

And so I have felt sometimes like I'm disrespecting things by combining medicines. And we should always ask permission, and we should be careful with what we combine, because some combinations don't work out right. And some combination, yeah, and, and we do need to get to know the medicines on their own as well, to know how they're going to play together. But herbalism has always been about mixing, which has always been about worshiping, which has always been about reconnecting and healing.

And so, of course, my

my pelvis journals, which I wish I'd done a little more diligently I didn't have very many transmissions. I started the field notes, and then I think I started to doubt myself with that. I started feeling like, Who the fuck am I? Nobody cares about this, but I was documenting my experimentation with combinations to find the right balances for different things. The one that most cracked me open, the Jesus, Jesus, the Judas Jesus, Judas cross cactus combination to crack you open and really do some soul excavation that was cacao, Amanita and LSD, just little bits of all of them, and not all at the same time, taken spaced out and Anita delivered at the appropriate moment. But I've now found the reverse, where sitting with them Anita earlier, allowing this new formulation takes a long time to come in, so that all the medicine blends are different. It's not just the medicines themselves, but introducing cacao later, when the Amanita is hitting, brings in a very interesting experience. It really spikes things up. It really feels like it blasts a new door open, the new door of the underworld, new door of the labyrinth of your mind, heart and soul. And I wonder if, all along, the medicines have been trying to communicate with me, the archetypes have been trying to communicate with me. If I'm a 13 Khan, and I was born with my crown open to the other realm. Songs, then, wouldn't it make sense that all this time, the ancestors have been trying to speak with me, maybe they've been forcing their way in, and maybe these times I got blackout drunk were times that I got mounted possessed. And so this play, it goes back to how I started. I need to trust what I was receiving in Escondido as all the hidden places were being broken open.

It was about existentially kinky and we are the universe's power bottom and querying the Bible and Greek mythology, querying our own stories by querying the stories we've been carrying,

and then remixing telling a different story, one that's empowering, one that's recognizing the

the parts that have been disowned within ourselves and our culture.

And I initiated myself today as a priest x of the new syncretism, the New Earth syncretic spiritualism, a hermetic order that has always been here, yet is something new. We are the universe's power bottoms, the unseen, unheard children of humanity, the ones who are told were powerless, but actually have control, have co creational power, not power over so the Play is a musical that combines medicine music with the

uh, electronic and shoegaze scores, syncretic, honoring and respecting the traditions we're drawing upon, but including and transcending, conveying trans as an emergent archetype by showing all of our heroes, Hero exes, as fluid, Hermes as our psychopomp, Jesus, Judas, Buddha, Ardha, hanari, Buddha, quetzalcoat Quetzalcoatl as non binary in the Greek pantheon, and reframing the maidens as not victims but heroes themselves. It's about formless versus form, leaving the womb, breaking the gaze, reframing disorders, reclaiming shame of strength, mixing and remixing.

So if I was actually getting possessed those times that I got blackout drunk,

yeah, I was. It was some part of self

that needed to get out. It was some larger archetype that was expressing itself through me that's been begging for expression, that's been screaming for attention for centuries, using my 13 con as a vehicle hopping a ride when I used the medicine of alcohol to open myself to the other realms, I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't know that drinking was a shamanic initiation. I didn't know that drinking was activating my medicine. Wow. This is an amazing reframe. This is an amazing remix. What if, instead of just the shame, oh, I had so much shame every time I got blackout drunk, I still have so much shame about all those times. But what if I was actually just activating my medicine, my shamanic powers, without knowing that that's what I was doing. And so I got mounted, I got possessed by these spirits, and they took over fuck. I think that's it. I think that's it, because it was not only past parts of self that were taking over traumatized child parts, but the archetypes of all the centuries that were expressing themselves through me in my individual story, the personal made universal. Fucking hell, that's

it. That's it, because I just read in kids thesis about i. How

the vessel you could get possessed by the vessel the pot could become the master, the pot telling the kettle who's boss, or something, the prenda subsuming

the priest. X,

yeah. If you don't know how to contain it, if you don't know how to maintain the self energy, then you will get possessed by these parts of self, by these archetypes, by these spirits, by these ancestors, whatever you want to call it. It's all the same thing, yes, and this is what happened to me in Escondido. Yes, I was activating my powers in that potently charged chamber. Man, that medicine space like that

was too intense of a place to live. Holy shit. I

mean, it wasn't too like I did it, but, I mean, it was part of it. That's why I was there, was to do it, but wow, I didn't know that's what I was doing. And I could have used a little more guidance. I wish I was a little more aware that that's what was happening when I went in there, but it happened. I mean, maybe that was part of it, was that I wasn't supposed to know. Maybe that's part of the initiation, is that you're not supposed to know. In fact, I'm getting the message that that is part of the initiation. Is you're not supposed to know it has to kind of be a surprise.

Or does it? Or is that our western interpretation? No, I think it does, because even in traditional cultures, that's how they would identify who the shaman in training were. They were the ones who got sick or injured. They were the ones who broke themselves open. They were the ones who entered into a painful experience to open that connection with the spirit world. So maybe the divorce was my first initiation that opened my 13 con portal. I bet it was. Maybe that's why four feels so important. I that's when things would have been falling apart for them. That's when Callan was conceived. Yeah.

So the pain is the breaking open is required, and part of that is the element of surprise. The difference is that in traditional cultures, you would have then the guide to come in that you could apprentice under, who would show you the way. And I had to figure it out on my own, calling on my community. But hey, so there we go. Oh, wow. But if the whole thing's about combining and about syncretism, then maybe the new shamanic initiation is not apprenticeship with one specific person. Maybe part of this process of trans emergence is that you have to put your own apprenticeship together. Whoa, this feels really important. I'm getting the message that this is really important. Kit. What do you think is this the building on your scholarship and learning and experience? You did the thing, but you were a bridge because you were the trans artist, scholar, performer, bridging the worlds. Yes, this only makes sense that I would be building on what you did. Because you were initiated, you were apprenticed. You did do that training that I have longed for my whole life. But I think part of my teaching and contribution is this really painful, lonely journey I've been on of really craving that one on one mentorship, and having instead to combine things, and having instead to cobble it together, and having instead to have it all keep coming back to me, trusting myself as the answer and have it all keep coming back to me, trusting my intuition with the wisdom and the invite advisement of all who have come before me And all who are in my world now, of knowing which medicine for which occasion, of knowing which combinations, of knowing who to call on in what situation. This is trans medicine. This is the. New syncretic Spiritism that I am the priest X, and I initiate myself today on a mosh because I am in service to Mother Earth, because this is the wisdom of Mother Earth, my body, my body, our body, body of Earth.

It's not for me, it's for us to carry the medicine forth.

That's fucking it. I mean, I

keep asking for an apprenticeship. I keep asking for one on one guidance, and again and again I get presented with. It's not all going to come from one place or one person again and again. I get presented with this thing from this person, this thing from this person, and all of it, because all of it has to come back to me, gut checking it with myself, and our returning our power to ourselves. And of course, this morning, I listened to the Ram Dass talk conscious aging about him, recalling a repressed memory of being a baby and having his mom hold him down and take his power away from him, and how the rest of his life was resisting that moment and going to Harvard and being somebody all to show his mommy that He could get up from under her thumb. Mine's the same showing my mom that I can break the gaze, trying to be somebody, to reassert that authority that I lost when I was a baby. But no one's going to give it to you. It's a process of remembering that you always had it to begin with. And this is trans emergence. This is trans emergence because all through history, it's been about training, apprenticing, it's been about there are right ways. And I do think that there are wrong ways, but I don't know that I think there are right ways anymore, unless we say anything that doesn't hurt anybody, and that honors the legacy and that practices reciprocity is right.

Trans emergence is syncretism. Trans emergence is combination inherently. I mean, it's alchemy, but even in a new way. Now it's not just one hermetic order. It's like we're drawing upon that and everything that came before it, and everything that has come after, and the new information that's being created now that's never existed before, because it can only happen from the unique combinations of our vessels

in this moment.

I've said it a million can a little collecting the knowledge and experience, synthesize seeing through our unique lens in this moment that is fleeting. New information is being created. Consciousness is being expanded.

This is the call, the Clarion to which we must respond. I me,

and I've been doing this process since I was a child, which has always been about syncretism, which has always been about researching all the different traditions, compiling them in my journal, in my tone, perning incense, sitting in the dark, calling upon my own inner guidance to advise me and creating stories and creating performance. And I always would write plays and poems and prose about what I was finding. And I'm very comfortable in the ceremony. I'm very comfortable in the process of gathering and combining, but I'm really, really scared to create now, and I don't know why that I've gotten into this phase where I can't put stuff out there. I guess just the trauma of when I did it in high school and I was shut down, and I guess just the fear in college of knowing that if I spoke my truth, Steven would leave me and him reading my journal, and Mark reading my journal, and Jody reading my journal, and everyone reading my sacred texts that were supposed to be secret. They hadn't been initiated, and they broke the seal. And this is something archetypal that was awakened within me. And so, of course, I got so scared that I couldn't do it anymore, because there's something in the legacy I feel as I'm saying this, this is truth channeling through me. There was something awakened. There was something in our collective past where people broke. Were the seals where people betrayed the secrets, and then we were all killed for it. And it happened all my life in a small scale. They read the journals, and they saw what I really thought, and they thought I was evil, and they thought I was crazy, and they thought I was fucked up and needed help, and they thought they needed to save me. I and so it all got taken from me. And so my power of creation got taken from me. And so I couldn't write those plays anymore. I couldn't say those things. I couldn't put them up on stage. And granted, I have to learn boundaries, and some of that stuff was inappropriate to put on stage. But, like, and, yeah,

I mean, there were relationships that needed to be left so I could speak my truth. But

there's ways to do it in metaphors, not so blatant. It's not revealing everyone that that's what I've learned now. That's what I'm learning through, through the theater. People that I've connected with, like you don't have to be literal.

You can disguise characters and other characters. I mean, I knew

that even then I

did it by making dad the mom. I mean, he still saw right through it. So I guess that was the fear

was that they'd know anyways.

But there are ways to do that going forward, where everything doesn't have to be so literal, and you can hide characters in other characters. That's possession, right?

So, yeah, somewhere along the way, and if we're connecting with these parts of self, the one who can't stop starting is the one that's afraid to actually put it on, because once they see what you think, they'll leave you. They'll punish you. They'll take it from you. They'll lock your books in the safe. They'll tell you, you're crazy. They'll send you to rehab. Somebody to save me. Somebody has to save me. Looks like a man, but he's a baby. Somebody saved me.

And I'm calling in the musical creators and the psychedelic explorers and the collaborators are coming together. I see it now. I

so help me connect with that part of self and that archetypal force that's bigger than me, than that's moving through me. Help me heal this for all of us to stop starting and get some things out there. We got to get on the stage again. We got to get on the page again.

How do we bring the hidden into the open?

And I feel like I want to cancel the Egypt trip and just stay in Ireland and in Scotland and go back to my ancestral lands and hold like a Hobbit and be cozy and do medicine and sound like that feels like what my soul's crying for now. I don't want to go burn around the Middle East,

but I also feel like I gotta trust the fact that I was called to Carl and this group of people, and I feel like I got to trust maybe that little part of self, that child that knew they existed in ancient Egypt and was drawn to it for a reason, and mom kind of pandered to it, but didn't believe it like maybe that's maybe part of the healing is going back there, even though it feels uncomfortable, but I don't know. Let me trust it, and if I need to cancel it, I'll do it.

Sure doesn't feel like the calling right now, but

I don't know. Maybe that's also the part of me that just wants to stay in the Shire. Maybe that's also the part of me that wants to hide out with Searcy forever. Maybe that's or maybe that's the part of me that,

yeah, returning home is a tricky concept,

because I do want to reclaim and reconnect with my ancestral legacy in. Lineage, but there is a big element of that, especially in Ireland, that's the like, don't leave the island. How does that connect to Circe And Odysseus? Don't leave the island. You have everything you need here.

Why would you leave? Don't leave home. Don't

leave the Shire. Everything you need is here. Why would you leave? Well, because it's about syncretism. Well, because it's about finding these other traditions. Oh, my God, Lord of the Rings, is about syncretism. And Jesus's story was about syncretism. So this, this is the part we got to bring in. Is Jesus in India, Jesus going to the east and learning from these other wisdoms and bringing them back. Jesus was syncretic. Jesus fucking Christ.

Pun intended,

Christianity is syncretism. And we act like this is this monolithic thing,

and we act like it's this western thing. It's actually not. It's actually Eastern mysticism.

Holy shit. This is coming in hot from the astral Christianity is syncretic, because it was only formed because Jesus went to the east and got that wisdom. And this is part of the Gospel of Judas, I think, is bringing back this awareness. The crystals want to come be part of this conversation. They're jumping into my hand. This is part of this awakening, the reawakening of a scary at the eschaton, the thing accelerating us toward the end of time, not all time forever, but this era as we know it, the common era is ending. The common era is ending. And so the people from before it are descending and returning and speaking through those of us who want to hear it, the Gospel of Judas Iscariot is that Christianity has always been syncretic, and Jesus wanted to rewrite the story and say it was all his shit, and he made it up, and he's the only one who can receive revelation. Jesus is the one who started the fucking Roman Catholic Church. Really, Jesus is the one that started the repression of knowledge really persecuted victim, martyr. That's the story. That's a nice one, but it's not reality. Him and Judas were in some existentially kinky S and M arrangement from the beginning. I trading top and bottom. Judas was the real victim Jesus. Jesus was the real scapegoat, but they both agreed to it in the beginning, because that's how this whole thing works. We all agree to everything. We just don't remember. I

It's all been syncretic all along.

Christianity was inspired by the east, and this is what I'm here to teach, and this is where my scholarship expands on kids and anthropologists who came before me, anthropologists and ecologists, who in my colleges, who saw the interconnectedness of everything and that indigenous traditions

kit was initiated in a specific lineage, but was it was is a trans person bridging the world, and I'm extending that bridge even further further back and further forward, maybe not further back. Sorry, that's not true, because African is the beginning. So maybe I'm actually, yeah, Ooh, okay, this is interesting. This is what's coming in as I look into the eyes of my Ayahuasca Guardian here on my altar. Yes, okay, so no, kit is further back, and Darren is further back and aksha is further back there the original ones. Of course, I would have to go to Africa. Of course, I'm being called. Mm, of course I'm being called to this retreat in Ghana. It felt like it didn't make any sense for me. But of course it does, because now I have African ancestry, because of kit, and African is the beginning of all of this, and Mesopotamian is the beginning of all of this, and Egypt is the beginning of all of this. So of course, I have to go to the pyramid. Yeah, it's not comfortable. Yeah, it's not cozy. Yeah, I just want to hole up in the Shire and

eat bread and pastries

as the winter comes. That's my hobbit nature. That's my Irish inclination, and I can do that at the. In. And so, of course, I'm going to come home through Ireland, but, yeah, we got to go back to the beginning to really understand it. And so kit is a bridge in this way of the past, and I'm bringing in, filling in the gaps along the way of all the syncretic little tidbits I've been gathering the breadcrumbs. I've been gathering the trail through the forest. I've been building meandering, leading this whole time, conjuring, being mounted without even knowing it, because I didn't give consent. Holy fucking shit. This is part of it. This is part of it. And last Equinox, what I was moving through was how I never really gave consent to anything. I wrote a poem The day after one year ago today, I wrote a poem about how I'd never really given consent for any sexual relation I'd had, almost except for David and Maria, the the one with a woman. I mean, okay, and with Steven, and that's interesting, because Steven is who I began exploring S and M with and then I got scared of it. I think that that sex magic, consensual sex, was a portal to open up something. Drinking was a portal to open up something, and I didn't realize the medicines I was messing with. I didn't realize that because I'm the 13 con that taking those medicines opens up something, and then spirits can possess you. And I didn't give consent because I didn't know what was happening. And I didn't give consent because I got possessed by my own past parts that needed healing because that hadn't been addressed properly. I didn't know what was happening, and so I got taken over, and that's why I would, god damn it, it's so obvious now. That's why I would get drunk and black out and do things that felt like they weren't me, and the next day I would be genuinely confused. And the next day I would say, where did that come from? The next day I

would say that isn't actually what I Holly wanted,

because it wasn't. It was what the shaman wanted. It was what the archetypes wanted. It was what the past parts of self wanted, and honestly it was the destiny, but I didn't realize it, and I didn't give consent to it. So of course, I've spent my whole life feeling like I've just been getting violated over and over, and I really have been and that has also happened from outside forces, and that's part of the legacy, but it was happening from within too. I

so this is the going forward. And so of course, one year later, I recognize what's happening now, and I've been through my shamanic initiation. I now step into my 13 con power. And of course, the day after the Eclipse, I'm getting tattooed with 13 con and poking it into my skin, because I reclaim this legacy, and I reframe this story for all of us, and I reframe and remix the unseen, unheard throughout history. I reframe and remix the Gospels of Judas and Jesus the Divine Feminine who's been screaming from the beginning, to let them create, to let them exist, to let the syncretism blossom. I know what's happening now. I have awakened to my own power. I have awakened to the tradition and the lineage that I'm part of. I didn't know that I'd been born into this because we didn't have the cultural framework for it. But now I see it. Now I claim it. I initiate myself as a priest x of the new syncretic spiritualism, the new old fashioned. Nothing's new, but it is. It is I initiate myself as a priestex of the syncretic, shamanistic spiritualism. The word shaman gets overused, though, I don't. I don't want to use that. Then the syncretic hermetic Yes, the syncretic hermetic spiritualism. That's it. I initiate myself as a priest. Acts of the syncretic hermetic spiritualism. Boom, baby. So and it's sexy and it's existentially kinky, and the key is just to realize that that's what you're doing. The key is to realize that that's what you're doing, and then only enter in with consent. We haven't been giving consent. Think. Have been happening to us without our consent from the beginning, so now it's about recognizing and reclaiming and re stating our power. We're here now. We're aware now, and that means no more things happening without our permission. And that's this new tradition, and that goes for the traditions that we're drawing upon, too. So we don't just do things with other people's traditions without being respectful, without being clear that this is something new we're creating, without being clear that this isn't the same thing. This is our our innovation, it's just about citing the sources giving honor and respect and pain reciprocity where that's appropriate, but also knowing that payment comes in different ways, and that part of the way forward is breaking free of this monetary system, and the indigenous people sell out their own cultures sometimes, and the indigenous people get possessed by the greed sometimes. And so we all have to be aware on all sides. And part of this new way forward is that, like, we're gonna get scooped and part of this new way forward is that we're not always gonna get credit in the way we'd like for our ideas. We may not always get financially compensated for our ideas, but it's about more than that, and we have to realize where that's appropriate and where maybe it's excessive to ask for it. Okay,

and this is my ceremony on the eight ish, eight emosh day. Wait, is it the emotion of the emotion, the service to the whole collective, to Mother Earth, the number of wholeness and coming together,

syncretic magic, initiation. Now I step forward into the new day, the new dawn, and help me see the parts that need to be seen, and help them step into this new era. And help us stop always starting and start finishing things. So complete this initiation ceremony you

so this is the incantation for our initiation, our body, my body, body of Earth, our initiatory oath to serve Pachamama, to build mycelial networks, our authority, our only, I want to say centralized, but that's not even really it. Our only governing body, our council of elders, is mother. Nature is ourselves, is the Earth, our collective body, our only centralized, quote, unquote, governing body is everybody is the earth. So if we doubt, we come back to the trees. We used to be trees. We come back to naturaleza, Pachamama, the earth, medicines, the plants, the mushrooms, the fungi, the animals. We come back to the earth, if ever we're in doubt, and we come back to our bodies. Our authority is nature and our bodies, and we always get consent first. And this is our remix, and this is our emergence, and this is trans star evolution. The knowledge that we are stars and we are star beings, and we come through mother realms, and we are just as alive in the night world as we are in the day world. And that's a whole nother recording for a whole nother day a whole nother chapter of exploration is this night world versus day world thing, and how funny that Charlie from always sunny was a prophet. I knew I was obsessed with that episode for a reason, night, man and day man and it's all about trauma healing. Anyways, that's for another day.

Yeah, I guess actually,

that's a revelation too. Is that's part of my medicine too, is to show that these, some of these media that people have actually written off as like misogynist or harmful, are actually prophetic and in some deep ways, like Fight Club was my awakening. Night, man, day. Man is a. And hermetic Odyssey about trauma healing and our ability to move between the realms like Charlie's a fucking Shaman. I should reach out to him, actually. Yeah. So anyways, Jesus, the gospel of Jesus is that Jesus, his shit was always syncretic, Buddhist and Vedic, and then he wanted to pretend that he invented it. So this is what we're here to heal, and this is part of the new order of syncretic, hermetic spiritualism, is that we're here to bring in what we've learned from science and academia into spirituality, which is citation and in situ, cite our sources, give credit to those who came before us. It doesn't mean we can't use it. We just have to show where we got it. We just have to not pretend that we invented it. We just have to show respect and reciprocity in all the forms that that might present.

Yeah, part of our emergence is bringing together all the disciplines. Is showing that science and spirituality aren't mutually exclusive, in situ, in context, bricolage, the scientific method, citing sources, giving credit, and kit was already drawing upon this and like they may seem like they're at odds, but they really aren't. They don't have to be. They aren't in the new syncretic, hermetic spirituality.

Channeling is exhausting. I'm really tired. I.