Healing Trauma, Optimising Energy, Chakra Alignment & Relationships With Troy Olds

7:43AM Aug 31, 2022

Speakers:

Angela Foster

Intro

Troy Olds

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amazing

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men

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experience

emdr

testosterone

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The men who are out there, verbally abusing, physically abusing being complete terrors are men who have too much oestrogen. Not too much testosterone, they have too much oestrogen.

Welcome to the high performance health podcast with your host, Angela Foster, the show where we talk about everything you need to break through limits and achieve a high performance, mind, body and lifestyle.

Hey, can you believe it is nearly the end of August this summer, it seems to have flown by. And we start to look towards September, and really kind of cracking on with our goals and finishing strong or at least that's what I've been doing in my coaching programmes and with my groups, and I hope that your year is going super well. In today's episode, we talk about a range of topics that can help you, including how to heal from past trauma. using techniques like EMDR, we talk about how to really how your inner world frames your outer world, and how to come from a place of self love and how to forgive yourself often for things that actually have nothing to do with you that that you didn't do that maybe you've ended up blaming yourself somehow. And my guest has been through a lot of trauma in his life and really had to find a new path and a new way. And I always think it's really helpful to hear from somebody who's walked that path. Because often we will see little pieces of ourselves and other people. And it can be tremendously helpful. Obviously, it doesn't replace any kind of psychotherapy of professional help. But it can be helpful sometimes to hear from someone who's been through it. And my guest today is Troy olds. He's a coach and entrepreneur. He's a Mars Venus coach, he's a Tony Robbins coach. And he helps people get clarity about what they really want to experience in their lives and create a plan to help them to get it. He does one to one coaching and wellness base camps where he shares modalities to have vibrant mind and body while enjoying amazing relationships and life. And from his journey to anti ageing doctors and biohackers to ceremonies with Charmin. Troy essentially shows you the way that he healed his own broken brain and nervous system system and shares them so that you can get really good results and quick results, too. And so as I say, we do dive into a whole range of topics here. So let me introduce you now to the lovely Troy. So Troy, it is so great to have you on the show and talk about how people can really up level every area of their life, I know that when I share this sort of content with my listeners, they absolutely love it. Because I think, you know, being the high performance health podcast, people are constantly trying to improve themselves and get the edge. And so when we got chatting a month or so ago, I was just so excited to have you on the show. So first of all a very warm welcome.

Thank you. Thank you so much, Angela. It's such an honour to be here. With you.

Yes, so great to have you, I think we're gonna really have some fun. So I guess, first of all, I think when we're thinking about how people might want to uplevel their lives, they're often in a situation where sometimes they know what they want, okay, there's a good number of people who may be struggling, and they don't quite know. But with this audience, I think often they know what they want, and what they want to achieve. But they're trying to figure out how can they get there, when they have so much other stuff going on as well in a world of distractions. And I know that you're a master and things like flow states, which we can dive into later. But as a starting point, what are your tips for people that have a goal in terms of how they can actually get there in the fastest time?

That's a great question, Angela. So person has to really know what they want, like truly what they want. And you've got to have a plan to get there, you know, develop a plan to achieve that. And the only reason that people typically don't take action on that plan is a limiting belief. Or they're not super clear about why they want that. And they're and people don't typically, by design chronically focused on the why they want it. Does that make

sense? Yeah, it does. It does. I always think that because that kind of drives the identity, doesn't it? If you don't know why you kind of almost don't know who you need to become to get to the to achieve the goal.

100% You know, I've heard it said, We've got to be able to maintain the level of excitement that we had when the idea came to us, right? Like we're super inspired, oh my god, this is exactly what I want. And then life goes on and it tails on. And that's the intention. That's why it's so important to on a daily basis. What do I want? Why do I want it? How am I going to get it and then develop a plan and really simplify it that, but as we know, people typically they, like I want to lose weight. You know, that's not enough. Why do I want to lose weight? I want to be around long enough for my grandkids. I want to be able to run up hills when I'm 80. Right? I want to have a joyful, juicy life filled with energy on a daily basis to experience more while I'm on this planet because it's a very short ride. You know, they've been very clear about that. And then how do we do those certain things is to compartmentalise it and calendar. Like if it's not on my calendar, it literally doesn't exist. So I calendar time to for my physical or my fitness, calendar time for my me time. Right? I calendar time for everything, literally. And so what I have on my calendar gets accomplished.

I'm the same. And I think I think people often actually set too many things to do as well, in a day. I think he kind of I think I've heard it said that if you have more than three priorities, you don't have any priorities. And so it's kind of like you should pick 123 things that you really want to achieve, because it's those small steps. Isn't it compounded over time. But I'm really curious when you talk about chunking, your calendar, because this is really helpful for a lot of people. Do you is this dynamic in nature, when you think about your exercise time, your personal time, things like that and your work time? Are you doing that like sitting down on a Sunday and chunking out the next week? Are you planning further ahead? Did you have days that you say right, this is the day I'm going to do interviews this day, I'm going to record content? Or how do you how do you sort of separate that

out? Great question. So first, it's important for me to remind myself that, you know, it's, we hear this, this term balance, we need balance in our lives. And I really believe that that's kind of a BS statement. I understand we understand what is meant by that. But life is more like harmonic, right. And so if we want to have really amazing relationships, then there's a skill set to that, if we want to have really amazing physical body kind of thinking, lots of vibrant energy, you know, that really is a food thing, right? Food rest, stress reduction, there's a skill set for that. And same thing with business, I want to have an amazing business. And there's there's a toolkit for that. So what I've learned myself, and just for your audience, to share, I can share with them I've been 19 years in a 12 step programme. 19 years ago, I came out of a recovery centre with a completely shot brain and nervous system rutronik Me massive anxiety and a memory that was so bad that I couldn't read it, I'd have to read a paragraph over and over to retain. So to say I was in a critical state isn't a big understatement. That's what got me on this journey. And so I started that was that was a pillar that I wanted to focus on, I had recovered my brain and my body, right, everything else, nothing mattered, I couldn't work and earn great money. So that was off the table, right without a brain. So I went to work on what mattered most to me at the time, which was to heal my brain and my body. So I found the best doctors, I read as many books as I possibly could I treated my body in a healthy way as a science experiment. You know, what happens if I mix this in my blender with that, what happens if I take you know cod liver oil instead of this? And, and I saw the progress with that. So once I got a basic protocol there, then I also knew because it's so linked, that I need to have some physical movement. Right. And so I got a basic walking routine. And so I then that's how I started to compartmentalise and put on my calendar what I was going to do. So I established a very doable, and very effective morning routine back then it was I put my tennis shoes by my bed, I would wake up in the morning, I'd have a glass of water with lemon and some Himalayan pink salt in it at room temperature and the first thing I would do, they put my feet on the floor and drink that water. And I would lace up my shoe, put in my earphones and I would go for a walk and I would listen to something inspiring. Because you know

that's so snug carry on say why? Because there's no I was well, I was just gonna say that's exactly what I did. To get over depression that first bit in the morning. I was clinically depressed for sort of 10 years on very strong anti psychotic medication and stuff. And I found to come off all the meds as well you kind of go through a period again of depression as you transition off. And what I found was that morning state that you talk about this is the point at which you have the most control over the rest of your day. Because as you come out of that theta state into alpha and you're kind of Daydream me you're a reprogram Um, that brain immediately and sometimes if you're not yet strong enough to do it, you've got to put someone like Tony Robbins in your ears, you've just got to do it and get and get moving, because that creates the energy, right, which starts to create the motivation, or that's what I thought.

Yeah, 100% I agree completely, and the science and the data proves exactly what you said, Angela, it's so true. You know, we are just, we're computer software. And we've got to put new data and, and for me, at that time, in my life, I had chronic negative thinking, chronic radical, low self esteem, because of the history, and I was stuck in that. And so in order for that to get, you know, the glass, that dirty water, you have to pour clean water into it so that it will be replaced. And that's what that process is. And then the physical movement. For people who are listening, if you are familiar with Andrew Huberman, amazing guy, great YouTube channel with amazing hacks and strategies to uplevel life, but he talks about going for a walk. And by having the like walking by houses or trees, whatever that is on either side of us. In the early morning, Sun resets our circadian rhythm for the day shuts off cortisol. Right. And but what it also does is it calms the amygdala. And I didn't understand that then. But now I understand why it works so well, because the woman who basically came up with EMDR, where you can hold these two things in your hand, and it goes left and right, and it reduces trauma, and it works for PTSD. That's where she discovered it was from walking, right? So they measure brainwaves, and they saw the fight or flight, the amygdala calm down when people are walking. And the same thing happens during EMDR.

Right, so EMDR, you're holding things in the left and the right,

you can Yeah, there, they hold the device. And it's like light stimulation, and then they kind of like talk therapy, through a trauma, and they will go to a trauma, the client will go to a to a trauma, and then they will stimulate left and right. And so a formerly high anxiety, painful memory. Through that process, it takes the the emotional energy out of it. And there's other ways to do it. You don't have to hold anything in your hands, people can learn to do this on their own. Just using your physical body. Our bodies are the most amazing toolkit, our breath, our movement, our focus, all of the things. So to tie it back around to your question, that's what I did. In the beginning, as I just put first things first, I might have wanted to earn a bunch of money and live in the big house. That wasn't, I had to get honest with myself, that wasn't going to happen. And that was not the next, the next right step, I need to recover my brain and my body. And so I started eating right, I started moving my body and starting putting really good input into my brain. And then I cut out everybody in my life that was below the line, not bad people, but people who are stuck in patterns, and negative thinking, and people speak in the way they think. And so I just limited my time with them. And I identified people that could help me. And I did what I could to be around those individuals as much as possible, and started getting strategies because success leaves clues. And so I started learning from mentors, coaches, implementing them, when I got my health dialled in, then obviously, you know, relationships and work were able to come after that. But the number one relationship with myself

is the number one is that you have to develop. Yeah, you can't expect. And it's interesting that you say there about health because I had to, I always think health has to be the foundation have sustained high performance in business and relationships in life. Because if you haven't got your health, you can't actually have any of this you can have extremely wealthy but if someone then removes health from you what exists, right it's the same with your relationships. So your health has to come first. And I think I learned it the hard way around totally burnt myself out as a lawyer. You know, and that was hard because you have everything that you're talking about there right the wealth, the prestige, the possession, the respect all of those things but zero health because I'm not sleeping and then you know, the people that listen to the podcast will know the story, but I think that you do have to rebuild it but I think it's also a constant work in progress. I don't know if you've found that like you can always up level out level because effectively you're fighting ageing right so if you're not monitoring and progressing that there is a force and we have these universal forces right that we whether we like it or not you throw the ball up, it's coming down as gravity they're invisible forces but they're they're

100% so true, Angela, it I have a really Amazing partner coach, Albert's blue at audacious, CrossFit and we do wellness space camp together and I bring in the teachers and I teach breathwork and meditation. He does all the physical movement. And I told him recently, I just turned 50 In November, just unburied from 51. And I said, I want to get the best shape of my life. And he goes Troy. Right now we're just slowing the decline. You could pop it up to 50 and said, Okay, we'll go with that.

Did you say to him, you haven't read lifeforce by Tony. Exactly having that. But you can reverse it. And yeah, it's interesting. So now now that you are obviously you have your health on track, emotionally, physically, spiritually, psychologically, everything. How do you you're busy, you're successful businessman, how do you now chunk your time in terms of like maintaining and expanding that productivity?

Really great question. It's, for me, it is identifying all the time and experience, because there, I'm a seeker like I truly want to experience as much as I possibly can on this planet, while I'm here, and I remember being three years old, and really genuinely feeling a heart of service. Like I want to help. And I want to, I want to experience and explore like an archaeologist. And then I, I believe that I'm in communion with the, with the universe, that we're all connected. In my own way in different ceremonies, thinking that we're all connected, that life gives us exactly what we order up and I ordered up, I want to be of service and I want to be wise and have these experiences. And so I got to be unwind, make unwise choices, and make stupid decisions, be completely selfish, completely self centred, and get the repercussion and consequence of that which equated the pain. Again, pain is a great motivator. And so with that pain, I started identifying who I was hurting once I stopped looking this way. And I started looking outside, through my experiences. And, and that's what gave me the experience and the wisdom to get to where I'm at today. The point of all that story is, you can't have those types of experiences without having a map. So I have a map of my emotional, my emotional life, and my relational life, as well as financial, physical. And so when I noticed that, okay, things are a little off here in my relationship with my intimate relationship with my beloved, then I'm going to shift time away from hiking in the hills, crushing my workouts working on getting a six pack, which is kind of challenging these days. And I'm going to invest my time here. Right now I've got a got a baseline. And literally, it's a point system. And it's, it's a point system that what am I going to do for Laurie today is going to make her feel loved, cherished. She's the only one and that she's amazing. So on a daily basis, I do a point. But sometimes it needs to be more than that, because we're all human that she has her experience as well. So I just noticed what it is financial, it's like, okay, we want freedom and experiences. And if our financial or bank account is at a certain level, then we have a conversation and we focus our time away from certain other aspects of our life into finances. Does that make sense? That's why I said like, I really don't believe balance balance doesn't move as balanced, nothing's moving. That's not life. That's why having the ability to move these different pillars relationally financially, you know, physically, are important. So life is like this. You know, sometimes I'm really working on business, sometimes I'm really working on fitness. But it's kind of like this, we want to like this. It used to be like this, bam, bam. You know, they didn't have the experience yet.

So we all know that we need to eat lots of healthy leafy greens, that we need to have a more vegetables that we need to eat kind of fermented for us to optimise the health of our gut and have prebiotic and probiotic rich foods that we can have things like mushrooms and different adaptogens really to support our adrenal function because once more stressed than ever before. But wouldn't it be amazing if you could find all these things in one easy drink to help you kind of like, I like to think of it as a kind of insurance policy. So I still eat all my vegetables and fruits and all the good things I need to do. But then they were just sometimes those days where you're just rushed off your feet and you don't quite manage to eat as well as you should. Or you just want to really get extra results and have that glowing clear skin. And that's why I love athletic greens so much. It is so tasty. It's so easy to make. It works super well on an empty stomach because it really enriches the health of your microbiome. And it tastes amazing. And so it's something that I personally take every single day and they are running an amazing offer. For listeners of this podcast. You can get a year's supply of vitamin D and five free couple bucks if you head over to athletic greens.com forward slash Angela Foster, as athletic greens.com. Forward slash Angela Foster. I have a shorter episode on the podcast called bite size bio hacks where I do it's just me and I just give people like 10 minutes or less how can you improve your life weekly? And I was recording it today and I was talking about morning routines. Because people have been asking me you've shared your evening routine, please, please can I listen to your morning routine. And I it's going to be over a series of episodes because I was explaining that it's dynamic in nature, right? Some mornings I wake up and particularly as a woman, right, who still has regular menstrual cycle things change across the month. So I can't say that. This is the morning routine, where I say where I must write. And I think people feel overwhelmed when you say, you must wake up and meditate and exercise and do gratitude, and do cold shower and find time for you. And fast and take weeks off first. And it's like, oh my god, oh my god. I've got three kids and two dogs and phone calls and two businesses. So you can say in how am I going to do this? You know, to me? Yeah, so I wake up, and now it's dynamic in nature. Like I know, we talked about the programming, that that first hour is really important. And sometimes it's not even gonna be the first hour, it's the first 10 minutes, because that's all I can find. But I need to programme it right. So if I wake up, and I assess that I am quite stressed, like at around ovulation is interesting. What the science shows is that the cortisol awakening response is higher. So maybe you're going and I'm tracking that now with my aura. But I'm trying to figure out is that the time that I just wake up a little bit more hyper than I've always hoped for, but a bit more hyper than I normally am. And if so, I'm trying to exercise seems to work better for me straight off the bat than meditation. Whereas other times, I'm not actually it no is spiritual, I want to be inwards. But I don't have to use to have to say, I've got to do all these things. And then you know, it's like nine o'clock before you've even started, even though you've got up at like, 435. It's crazy. I like to become a routine. And so I agree with you. And that's exactly the same as me, which is why I actually really like to plan my week on a Sunday. Look at what's ahead. Think about what do I want to fit in? How do I want to have time with my kids? My family? What What am I working on it as you say? It's, you've always got to pay attention and keep the weeds out. But you're probably you're not always growing every single area at the same time. Sometimes some areas are maintaining, like you know, the height of summer, before it goes into fall. You just want to make sure that you're not letting things go barren and winter too often. Right?

Well said, I love it. I love your ability, Angela to take things that may be complicated and simplify it. I think that's truly one of your geniuses. So like I, I'll tell I'll tell you all kinds of stories to come back that you know, in 10 minutes that you just said into, but that's exactly it. We've got to have our baseline, right, and just know what's going.

Yeah, I know ourselves. I agree with you. I think that's key. Now when you were talking that is interesting, because you're talking about creating the state. And I know one of your specialties is neural regeneration flow states. And I think this is going to be a really interesting area for listeners. Because when you're playing with different states, can you explain like, how do you do? How does that piece work for you?

You bet Absolutely. This is my favourite topic. Because we have everything that we need, you know, our bodies are these amazing tools for breath work. So I think does everyone know what flow states are? It's that creative state where things become effortless. Quick story, Steven Kotler the wrote a book the rise of Superman, amazing dude, but he got Lyme disease. And he was basically on his deathbed. He was nonfunctioning 23 hours a day laying down in the dark because he couldn't stand light wasn't eating, and there were no solutions. He's exhausted those. And so his friends came over, like different said, would do and they said, Listen, if you're gonna die anyway, let's go surfing. So they drug you that off the couch and even went out with them and paddled out. And he had enough energy to catch a wave and pop up on the board. And he said, he'd been in a funky state for a years. And instantly, he was in complete flow time stood still, he felt amazing. And he said in an instant, he knew he was going to win. So that's a flow state. We have flow states when we are, you know, when we're reading or we're just staring and focusing, which is a hypnotic state and, you know, literally an hour can go by, and then we wake up. So flow states are incredibly healing. They're incredibly creative. I believe it's communion with the divine, it's really more at our true self. And so flow states are that place where we can rescript create from our unconscious into the quantum realm. So I was in my journey to have a to learn What I needed to learn next, I met a gentleman who his brother was one of the individuals who was here always tell me, why are you so like, I don't want to offend people here and he said, listen, there are people in the world who train people like Jason Bourne, the movie, Jason Bourne, those people really exist. This is the guy who's above that and train those individuals, he was kind of like, pulled into this secret group. So incredibly brilliant, incredibly talented individual. And so they have access to technologies that are amazing. And so my mentor taught me those technologies. And I would say, let them hey, I did this for I meditated for five minutes. He says, You've not only peeked in the door, he says, You've got to go for at least 3045. So long story short, I was going in and he taught me how to restrict my unconscious, my traumatic experiences that would show up in my now that would get a reaction, I would go unconscious, and it would be embarrassing, because it's my boardroom meeting, like with my business, but yet somebody says something a certain way, and I shut down. I hope that makes sense to you, though the reaction, people are 99% unconscious on a daily basis, they're not choosing. And so he showed me that. And then he, we, he showed me how to restrict that, to where at more of the time, I'm at choice. So for two, two and a half years, I spent an hour in meditation in the morning, an hour and meditation at night, who the hill is going to do that right people step off, I spent about five minutes in that space today. But that's

because you've learned to get there quicker, right? So just through the breath very quickly,

we paved roads, and I have seen things and, you know, I've seen things in that space through breathwork that were more or as profound as sitting in an Ayahuasca ceremony, genuinely. And so in that space, that you were able to create our future clean up our path. And so I'm really big on flow states for that reason, because I want to be as conscious and awake as I possibly can be. So that I can create futures that are clean, right? And so that that's what I began with flow states. Now it's through breath, work, literally through five minutes of breath work, I can get into that space, that quantum realm can teach anybody how to do it, I'm happy to do a video for you and your your, your your clients. But if you talk a little bit, answer your question, though, Angela. Oh, did you just muted?

Yeah, no, I would love that in my in my membership in the female collective, if you would teach how to get into that state. That would help actually, because I think a lot of people would enjoy that. I found that, you know, I've the state that you're talking about, I haven't done plant medicine. I think more because I've had such strong medication that I'm very at the moment. So wary of it, I've had to create a significant distance without anything further. I've wanted to for a number of years before I interfere if you'd like with my brain again. So I do it through breathwork and meditation. And what I found is, interestingly, hypnosis after two hours of hypnosis, I've been into that state and that world, and the only way I can describe that and if this is how you found it is all of that self loathing and stuff that you have and the guilt and the negativity that was there before, right. Everything is like peeling away layers. And then almost you know, Dr. Joe Dispenza talks about no body, no mind, you suddenly don't exist that you do exist. It's weird. And that must be like your spiritual essence, right, which Bob Proctor or as you say, he's sadly passed away now, as an amazing mastermind group with him for a year as transformational. And he, he would always say your spiritual DNA is perfect. And that was what I saw was this and this whole desire within me to serve as many people as I can and help them I totally connected like so deeply with that after two hours of hypnosis, and you can't kind of unlearn that, right? Once you've been there. It stays with you. And then every day it empowers you to be more of service to other people I've found. But I found that through hypnosis, but if you have a way of getting there in five to 10 minutes, that's awesome. Because I've got there sort of after 1520 minutes meditation, I find you have to go you have to let your mind quiet for quite a while. Just let the flow of thoughts flow in and out together.

Absolutely. Yeah. You're 100% from My experience, right on the money you eat, everybody who's watching us can go into the states, just with breathwork. Some people are more able than others, just like some people are more wired for say, bodybuilding than others, but they can still get in shape. Some everybody can get in really great shape there. And so I'll share that with you. And I really love that over other plant medicines as well. And for those of you who have heard that I was made, I'm 19 years in a 12 step programme. What happened for me is I was a hard no on anything psychedelic. I had a really traumatic breakup. For me, it brought up really root cause issues that were really affecting my life. And I had a good friend who said, Listen, I think that you need to experience this. And I just had this download, you're doing this. So I went to my, my mentor, my sponsor in that programme and said, I'm not asking, I'm telling you, I'm going to do this, I just want to be honest, and let you know, he said, we'll bring back the notes. And so I did, and it was a game changing. But what I've noticed in that plant medicine experience was the similarities of the place that we go to when we brought do breathwork. And that deep hypnosis, and so everybody can do it. They don't have to do plant medicine. Micro dosing for me today is really about neuro regenerative Regenesis, I want to regrow neural pathways. And with the technology and practices that I've learned, I'm able to really programme myself in ways that are going to optimise me for greater service to myself to my family to the world and the planet. So I think that's what you were asking about micro dosing and flow state.

But also with the breath work. When you when you do that, are you doing a kind of faster breath to create those states. Or if you're, if you're doing it quickly, what have you found will help you enter that state more quickly, because you can do faster breathwork, where it's very stimulatory and empowering and it really creates energy quickly within the body. Whereas I found that actually slowing that breath seems to work more effectively for me, and I'm just curious what you found and how you get into that state?

Yeah, great question. So, again, now it's tools right? In the beginning, I had one tool to go in. And now there's tools for energy that's focused all those things. So what I was taught by my mentor at that time was how to go into the unconscious, identify many of us, everybody rather, has a lot of unconscious trauma and unconscious programmes that are really running the show. They're really running the show. And we're saying no, no, I'm choosing. Now that's not happening. But we also have scenarios in our life that we are conscious of that are challenging. And so what he would do is a combination of kind of like the brain gym kinesthetic stuff, like right hand over left hand or left hand over right hand, and we'll go into the reason why you would do different, right, but overlap foot crossover, like the tongue on the roof of the mouth for energy. And then it would be a breath, work of an in breath. And I already know my mantra. And so in this instance, just for this example, I would say, on the breath, I would think of a time when I was harmed as a child, by anybody. And I would be, then I would experience that I would draw up the experience of it happening, right, recreating that emotion, and I would breathe in. And in my mind, I would say I forgive myself completely and unconditionally, I forgive all the ones who have harmed me in the past. And then on the exhale, I would completely relaxed. And then kind of then hold the pause, and just feel relaxed. And then I would conjure that negative emotion, again, that experience as real as I possibly can and breathe in. I forgive myself completely and unconditionally, and I forgive all the ones who have harmed me in the past. And then, on that, in that same process, I would go, like rescript into I love myself completely and unconditionally. It's a gift and a blessing to be me. So what we're doing is remember that EMDR scenario, right? There's there's also don't go into all of that, but there's the the emotional trauma that is now conscious, and I am restricting. And I relax into a calm and relaxed state when I do that literally over and over. And the work is to draw up and try to recreate the experience of when it happened to the child or when it happened this morning. And you can do it for stuff for everything. And over and over and over with that breath work. What happened is that emotion diminishes, right. Remember what I was saying about EMDR is the same type of scenario. So now that diminishes we know the work is done. I'm clean when I'm going, well, you know, the experience happened, I can see it. No, no, there's nothing, nothing, no emotional response. Okay, I'm good about my day. Right? So that so that breathwork was in pause, experience, experience, experience, relax, same kind of a box breath out, and then pause and relax, and then draw back up over and over again. And it is amazing that what happens is things that were unconscious now become conscious, that we didn't even know exist, like, wait a minute, and this even is just a hallucination. That really happened to me. But it starts to unfold and becomes like dominoes. And the more work we do, the more is revealed, the more we're able to identify them and do the work on them. And now we're literally living in a clean state emotional state, more able to choose the life that we're living. We all know, those individuals were like, This always happens to me why, uh, you know, man, same damn relationship. Again, there's a reason for that, yeah,

you're attracting, you're attracting that as soon as if it is, I think, I think I don't think I'm going to quote him correctly. But I think Wayne Dyer says something that you can, you can either be like a voice of God or a victim to your ego. And I think it's kind of it's something like that, that he said, and it's really interesting, because whether you believe in God or not, if you believe that there is some form of extra kind of dimension, or spiritual power, right, something beyond us, then really, when you connect with yourself, which is that spiritual DNA within you, and then you become the voice and you come from a place of service, it's hard, it's easier to forgive people that hurt you, right? Because in them is the same, right. And sometimes people are reflecting back at you, where you need to do some work. And it is hard, I've had people that I think it's been really difficult to forgive, and it's taken sometimes, it might take many years for people to do this. But when they do, it actually releases you forgive for you, not for the other person, they don't hear, but you it's within you, you're holding that trauma within and that experience for as long as you can't forget. And I'm not saying it easy, but it is liberating, isn't it, it's like a weight being released from you.

Very, very liberating. And it's, it's not that forgiveness, it is to release ourselves. And ambass Yeah, but now we have the choice to we've got to be responsible with whether to choose to be in relationship and what that relationship now looks like moving forward because it's not okay to be abused by anyone, emotionally, physically. Not I mean, it's real, but it's very important for us to maintain our, our joy and our serenity to forgive them and be able to let go and that the practice there was a practice for me. And but so important, and I know this has gone really into this is this type of stuff that really turns me on. Because when we can tap into and clean that stuff up, it's amazing what type of physical manifestation just ease just released. Because stuff in the unconscious is manifesting in different forms of dis ease in the body. And but it's very difficult to get people to get with people, tell them that you can help them and then take them into this place first, where they're just like eff off dude, I don't have that much time. So for everybody listening, this is for you and your family, give people what they want so you can give them what they need. When I first started coaching was like hey man, I'm gonna show you how to get a six pack and a better erection and guide her like yeah, giving them what they want

and so then I would say okay, here's what we start let's go to the grocery store, we get right and we start buying organic, healthy nutritious meals, so that we can start feeding the body the right nutrients so that their endocrine system can start to heal itself and by then we've earned the trust right Once that's happened many doors open more people are open to having a conversation about diving into the unconscious it's really important for people to understand for myself to understand and remit remind myself, the unconscious does not want to be changed. It does not want to change. So we have to override that. Just like our bodies don't want to get out and go hiking up the hill is designed for homeostasis. And so this is a process of that's why cold showers are so great. I think a cold shower this morning didn't break and want to nice warm said the water like damn, but I do it because I let myself know I'm in control of this biology. I am choosing my life. And then obviously all of the Amazing Health Benefits of cold immersion immersion.

Yeah, I love that. I love that we have to overcome ourselves. Really Don't worry on a regular basis I think. So want to quickly dive in and let you know that if you're looking at your goals and wanting to close out the year strong, and really optimise the health of your mind, body and spirit, but you don't know how to get started, then head over to my membership site at the female biohacker collective because we have a tonne of resources in there to help you, from optimising the health of your gut, to optimising for metabolic flexibility for creating an ideal empowering morning routine, developing greater stress and resilience, and more challenges are masterclasses to come around things like sleep, and menstrual cycle optimization, and a whole lot more and a wonderful, wonderful, wonderful community of women over there with me, and my health coach Maura, we have such a lovely time in that group. And we would love to see you in there. So there is currently a going back to school half price offer. And you can go and find out more over at Angela foster.me. Forward slash biohacker. That's Angela foster.me. Forward slash biohacker. Be sure to head over there before September 10. To take advantage of price back to school offer. Now let's get back to the show. We often ask the wrong questions, right? Because our brains are like Google. So ask a better question. Because it's gonna answer you either way. And it wants to be proved that right that all to you is right. And that's how you should be there you stay stuck. It's funny how we sort of choose the familiar over what we really want? Because there is this is the comfort zone, isn't it? It's yeah, it's like, is there a better way to explain to people when they're trying to lose weight, that we can do all the metabolic stuff. But you need to understand that there's a myth there is a real metabolic setpoint. But it's driven by your subconscious. And that is a psychological standpoint, a setpoint, as much as anything else. And so until we can re, like readjust the psychological and metabolic setpoint, no matter whether you lose weight, you won't keep it off. Because your body is just going to inherently take you back that subconscious means right you're going to sabotage in some way. It's hard.

You said a minute ago. The familiar is the enemy of expansion. Yes, it's just

as a better way of putting it is the anatomy of expansion.

100%. And we can once we know that now what you now we are choosing once we know that then we have the ability to choose whether we're going to do the work or not do the work. And if people don't do the work, the why the what and the why is not clear enough, or there might be a limiting belief, which that technique that we just went through will actually clean up. You know, and that's I was thinking while we were talking about that Carl Jung said something that I will paraphrase that if we don't bring the unconscious conscious history will repeat itself. And we will call it fate. Yes. Right, so true, and die that? Well, the thing that I know now is because I've been there done that got this stuff, lots of stuff, gave everything away been humiliated by my poor choices in my life, that very, very humbled that I'm not I don't I, most of the time, don't give a shit about what people think of me. Because that's on them. And I'm that masculine guy, and I'm a masculine looking guy that is able to you know, just tell it like it is like, I'm scared, like, I need help. raise my hand, please help me. And I think that gives permission to others to do the same. You know what I mean?

Yeah, definitely. And I think it's so I don't know, I just love what you're sharing, because I think it's so important. And I think that we live in a world now fortunately, were effectively embracing what you would really call the feminine, right, which is like, on the spiritual side is the divine feminine. And I actually think the world will be a better place for it. Because we've kind of been conditioned, I think, you know, men, I was actually surprised that my kids at a prep school they were at, we're told that the boys were told they shouldn't cry. And it's like, come on, all right, society has moved well beyond this that, you know, like, if you think the pressure that has historically been on men or boys don't cry, men don't cry, don't do that. And then women are not so empowered and can't like I just think now we're actually both men and women. So men are embracing the feminine side of their personalities more, and women are embracing a little bit of the masculine and that's driving them is so much the better. And we don't like the word balance, but it does create a little bit more harmony should I say I think it truly,

truly does. And I know you interviewed John grey, and John Grey is one of my mentors and going to meet with him next this coming weekend. actually amazing I highly encourage people to get his book This isn't like was just happen to be laying here but it's just as important beyond Mars Venus, that that what you're talking about men embracing their feminine side and it's all say about this you guys can get the book and really learn a lot more. The men who are out there verbally abusing physically abusing being complete terrors are men who have too much oestrogen. Not too much testosterone, they have too much oestrogen. Right? And there's such vast differences, what we're being told in the media and the social. And these conversations in most ways, it's exactly the opposite. But this is this book has been a game changer for my new relationship with Laurie. It talks about where men and women are very different to that point that men don't cry. Like John would say, like Laurie always asked me Do you cry about how much you love me because she does it. And I now face I do. But it's my job to be a stand for your safety, your security for you to become the best version of yourself. And so I don't do that. But when I'm driving in my jeep driving down the road listening to the archangel sent by angels. Damn right. I'm just letting it flow. That emotional side. When I feel compassion when I see somebody harmed that is defenceless. You damn right, I'm gonna cry. When I'm that guy that just let it all out during movies. The Hulu series this is uh, oh my god. So cathartic? It's just a great therapy for me. I'm watching this movie to make me cry. But there's a few episodes of this is where I've literally like got a pillow over my face sobbing.

Do you know what's really it's really interesting when he's saying that. John, first of all, what I say is go back and listen. And he was listening to this. We interviewed John grey. And he talks about men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. Annie actually taught through what happened when I had first had my children. And why my husband and I had never really argued before. And then we started arguing and what was going on in that whole oestrogen and testosterone thing. So everyone should go back and listen, because it was actually really, really insightful. But also, what I was going to say is it was really interesting. It was another guest on this show, Dr. Libby Weaver who pointed out on one of her presentations I'd actually been to around women with PCOS, which I have right and you have higher androgens higher testosterone. And she she I remember her saying on a workshop, that if this doesn't resonate for you completely ignore it. But maybe it will. Were you raised to be a strong woman by a father who was quite dominant, quite powerful. And my dad really inspired me to success. But he was so strong. And my sister, as I've been, I guess, she's more emotionally open. And I felt very closed and that I had to be the strong one. And isn't that interesting, but that like links and how that might have, you know, it just resonated me, hormonally manifested in me. And so I've definitely now I'm all about embracing femininity. In fact, that's what I say my mission is to empower women to higher performance by embracing their femininity. So yeah, really interesting that you're saying that, but I do think and I do, like my boys cry for sure. Because I think it's important and that they understand they can still be valued, right? They express their emotions. So you touched there before you guys you want to talk about testosterone, because you know, you know, this, and this Sunday, John talks about a loss. So many people are men are struggling with lower levels of testosterone. And, you know, things like hormone disruptors that are in our environment. But also, you know, I'm, I'm afraid you're on telling me over dinner that, you know, men should should make love to their wives once a week. And that was the optimum amount of time for testosterone optimization as they get older, if they really want to optimise that. But I'm just curious, you work with so many men, this is a specialty of yours. What have you found? What do you think is really disrupting men's testosterone levels?

I love this conversation. I want to step back in regard like what John says, it's, it's not to have to make love once a week. It is if and this is where we may lose listeners, I highly encourage everybody to go listen to John stuff. So I am a Mars Venus coach. And so this is why I work with John Cleese phenomenal and so we got that certification, some other things but his work is so so appropriate for what's going on in the world today. That a couple of things with testosterone what he was saying with that is how have make make love. Have sex on a daily basis multiple times a day, have multiple orgasms every day, but men don't release

don't So yeah, sorry, I should have said that. But that's hard, right? Because that's a learned. So it's quite difficult to control that. You're basically saying don't don't ejaculate.

Exactly. Yeah, exactly. So like, I'm telling you the Wake when it is a practice, it is absolutely learnable. And it is so worth learning. Because when that happens, every step of the process of lovemaking, it's phenomenal. And happy to talk to you guys you know about that is or share with you, Angela about that, because it really connects intimacy. So what it is, it's women are different than men, men can just like, Hey, you want to roll over. That's it, women, it takes 10 minutes minimum, typically like 15 minutes to get into a space. So guys know this. If you work the tough spot, if you say we're using some NLP in a kind and loving way, you remember that time we met, and we did this at that time, oh, he and she thinks about that, and then then start to touch her. Right, get back into that state. But then tickle her ear lobes reach over and kiss her cheek, rubber, tummy, whatever that may look like. Moving around, and then little kisses on the lips. Right and just taking temperatures, right? She would do that for you do that for her. If she's not interested in great, don't, don't proceed, but if she is, there's the process of revving up her engine. And so when you're in that space of slowing things down, and honouring her to get her into a space where she truly is ready to receive you, you'll know that when she opens her mouth and puts her tongue in your mouth, that is a sign of penetration, right? So then for men go ahead and go down there and do that. But it's okay, we have kind of graphic cool conversation. Yeah,

awful not to listen to this one on the school run.

Lesson on the score.

Go down there and just replace your finger with your penis, and then play around and massage without penetration. And that's what it is playing. But every step of the way is an orgasm. So you can be multi orgasmic. But we're going to on a scale of one being zero. Sexual Energy to 10 being a climax, take it to a seven and practice getting to a seven. It's amazing. And you will see experiencing

Oh, okay, I understand now. Sorry. So I there's a misunderstanding. So when you said you have an orgasm, I thought you meant reach climax. Okay. Because

orgasm is that so we all have societally as I an orgasm because I ejaculated. What I'm saying what John's saying is orgasm is the emotion that feeling of tickling me here. That's a one or two, you know kissing the cheek biting the nipple, that's about three or four or five.

So that like goosebump feeling that counts on the orgasms scale.

how juicy is that though, right? enjoyment of one another. People are effing consistently, but they have had, they have not connected and made love for so long. When you do this process, you're going to experience Nirvana literally. And you can take that up to a seven scale and down and up to seven. Now your woman, by all means with your penis, not a toy. There's a reason for that too. And I've made awesome listeners that she can be multi-orgasmic and by God give her that joy, but you retain. And what John was saying is if you're going to climax ejaculate once a week, because once you do, your testosterone is going to tank bone, right? It's gonna tank and that negatively affects a lot of areas of our life. We're not clear and driven in our work. We're not enough players and driven in our workout. So he's not saying don't eat don't ejaculate, just slow them down. And then the other thing

that's really interesting, you've read thinking Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. transmutation of energy, because if you're doing it too much, and also if you're distracted by things like pornography, gambling, it'll actually take you away from your goals by all those years ago, he wrote about that. And if you look at my soccer teams and things when they tour around the world, they are not allowed with their partners during that period, because actually, that would lower testosterone in that drive. And it's a surreal thing, right? It's been documented from for a long, long time.

1000s of years. And there's a process to teach it. That is a combination that was so cool, as we've like, grown and experienced and learned and practice is I've got a really beautiful toolkit where I've really discovered patterns like Oh, Oh that kind of teaching that and that connects with this. So these toolkits, we can get into a very mystical state by using to Malini and the practice of retaining information to retain. So just by the practice of learning to retain samen, you're going to already be doing a Kundalini type process, which is moving your, your energy from your root chakra up into the crown chakra and your pineal gland, which will open up mystical states that probably went over a lot of people's heads but

by effect, just by withholding,

by learning to Kundalini. Because, yeah, we could do another conversation with it. I love

another episode on the show, because it's kind of a separate thing. So rabbit hole,

sharing my life, I moved through my first marriage because I was zero had zero skills. I had I was scared as a man, I was selfish, self centred. I was driven by like bubblegum, marbles and chalk, the money, the cars, that all that stuff, because I thought that would make me who I am. And all the choices, the poor choices, the creative pain, that I had to ask for help, because my life was intolerable. Right, amazing gift to me. And this opportunity now to share this information for men and women. And I love teaching this, like I don't teach them I show them how to do this stuff. With their partner, it's so priceless. Because I now have attracted truly an amazing mate. You know, we want the perfect partner that doesn't exist. If you get a strong seven, you better put a ring on it. You can we can grow together to an eight, but I tell you they do exist. But the one that we're in, regardless, if we take this practice and take the time, and start really connecting and love making in and out of the bedroom, you've got a partner now to where you can fully express your dharma, your soul's purpose, what you really came here to do so and remember what they want. We give them what they want to we can give them what they need. I'll get you to help show you how to get a six pack and a strong erections. So we can have conversations like this. And maybe this is a good place for us to wrap. Yes, yes, sir said something on an interview that just smacked me between the eyes. Buddha said it this way. The problem is we think we have time. We don't. Jesse, as I said that was being interviewed by I think it was ritual. And he asked Rich that How old are your parents? He said, they're 74. And I think those that was the numbers, just how often do you see your parents? You said I see him twice a year. He says the average life expectancy is 78. He says you think you've got four more years. He says you've got eight more time. Right. So life will look exactly the same, maybe different house, maybe different relationship, maybe different job. For most people day after day after day after day till they drop off. For those of people that you work with, you're not here by accident, you are truly seeking, and I believe choosing to create. And so everything that we're talking about is creating a life by design, something that will be imprinted on the quantum field for forever. And, you know, we we want to have a legacy. You know, what we're bringing in the frequency that we have and hold right now is imprinting the quantum realm for all of us hippies. And so that now is able to be accessed by everyone in the future for the rest of time. Which doesn't exist. Does that make sense?

Yeah, no, absolutely does. And I think that energy is such a real thing. I remember learning from Mission McCarney, actually of Mindvalley, that, you know, this beautiful meditation where urogen, Nikola, right, that represents love, and that vibrational energy. And then you imagine that colour kind of filling you because it starts with you, right, and then everyone in your house, every person that lives in your house, the plants, the animals, and then expands out and you visualise this colour going across your city or town or village and then it goes out across the country, and then across the continents, until he's literally coloured in the whole world. And that was one of the most amazing ways to start the day. Because now you just feel like you connected with humanity with like the 8 billion people and all the animals and all the plants and everything on the planet, right? And just shared your love and it's so expansive for you. But I really believe like that energy going out as well. Is it making a difference? Because they've started it, haven't they? They've moved on markets, but I think it'd be the stock market in Israel with a big meditation and things like this have a certain number of people at same time amazing.

I love these conversations so much, you know, this is a statement of responsibility. Because what I now know and choose to believe as real for me based on all the the work is that we are contributing. And so if we're all connected, we are all one. And we are literally connected to everything. That means that what we think is, is literally a contribution. Right? are we contributing good stuff? So anybody who is chronically stuck in why did that always happen to me I'm so stupid, I'm so fat. Now cancel clear that all bullshit. But if you're having those conversations with yourself, and you're saying, but I'm kind, I'm nice. You're that's what we're putting into that quantum realm. That's where our contribution into the math consciousness is where everybody is tapping into and getting inspiration. And that's one of the greatest ways we could turn things around right now is most people are tapped into the scary news, the bullshit that's going on out there that is absolutely motivated by agenda to benefit a select few people on the planet and to give a shit about the rest of us. Right, but they have control of this media. And so they're programming everybody on the planet, our way of making a contribution is to turn that shit off. And to hold space, just like you said, Angela, talk kindly of ourselves. Only be above the line. Ownership, accountability, responsibility. No more blame. No more excuses. No more denying that chips. Okay? Right. And doing this work one step at a time, start right where you're at, with what you have, and just do the best you can and ask for help.

Amazing, and you've proven that wow, what a journey. I'm so grateful that you've shared your story at the beginning. Troy, thank you so much for coming on the show and sharing all of this. I know we're going to need to do that the we definitely have to do this again. But first, where can listeners come and connect with you and your work?

I think the socials, Facebook is I know, I'm that guy that

look it up. Yeah.

Troy old Troy old.com. If you'd like to connect and chat, we can certainly do that there. But those are the two primary places or

oils.com. Or Facebook is Troy hills. Is it? Yeah, yeah.

Forward slash Troy old. And if you want to email me at Troy olds, coaching@gmail.com.

Amazing. Thank you so much for sharing that. And we will link to all of that in the show notes. And thank you so much for your time. And yeah, it's just I've loved chatting to you and actually hearing about your approach. I just think every woman listening to this is no my boyfriend because that's girls know it takes time. Right? And, and enjoy. Enjoy. Yeah, that that sort of longer, more sensual experience. So thank you so much. We talked about so much flow states, essentially everything else. It's been amazing to have you on the show. Thank you.

Truly my honour. Thanks, Angela.

Thanks for listening. Remember to review and subscribe, you can grab the show notes, the resources and highlights of everything Angela mentioned over at Angela Foster performance.com. You can also snatch up plenty of other goodies, including the highly helpful Angela recommends page which is a list of everything she personally recommend to optimise your mind, body and lifestyle.