But I have to ask you a question. How often are you doing something relaxing that's, you know, quote unquote, relaxing, or quote unquote, leisurely. And yet you're mind is racing a mile a minute, or stuck on a loop with one thought or worry? Or maybe, do you not feel at ease at all? Because I hear that from a lot of people. So I want you to know that you're not alone. And there's nothing wrong with you. Right? That's the system. That's what the system has designed you to feel like. And so I find that when I talk about relaxing, leisure or things like that, you know, for a lot of people, it feels easier said than done. But I want you to know that there's no one right way, and there's no one perfect way. And there's no one perfect gateway, either, it really is an individual process. And honestly, I have to tell you, it's really not about this specific action at all, because due to the fast paced nature of capitalism, due to all the horrors and injustices we're living in, day in and day out, many of us are walking around in various states of dysregulation. And this is not just on the surface, but down to a cellular level. So as a result, we've got to meet ourselves in that place. Right? Because if you are, you know, extremely dysregulated now we're for, you know, the last however long, it's not going to be easy for you to just sit on the couch and relax. It's just not. That's not the your starting point. That's not the most appropriate or most supportive starting point. And so you must consider where are you? How are you feeling these days? How are you experiencing life, right? So you know, always considering exactly what you are experiencing. And, you know, this is the invitation I constantly offer to the folks in my self care mentorship program, the holistic self care collective, right, because they've got to meet themselves where they are. And the reality is, they're all individuals. And the offering that I have for them this month is to be mellow, which is the direct opposite energy of Pitta. And my predominant clients, of course as to be expected are like what mellow because here's the thing. When it comes to mellow the Googler tells us the definition is pleasantly smooth or soft or free from harshness. And in our society, especially here in America, there is a stigma attached to the human characteristic of soft. We consider we say that often as like a dig, oh, that person saw, Oh, you're such a softy. As in like you're a pushover, or somebody who's easily walked all over or you give in quote unquote, right? Easily. But here's the thing, if you consider dysregulation, if you consider the baggage that you're carrying around, or the trauma you're carrying around, how do you carry it? And what does it feel like? What does it look like? How does it sound? You might be saying things like brittle, rough, fiery, right? It's, it's not smooth, it is not soft, it is probably parts of it harsh. And so if we are carrying that shit around, right, and many of us very expertly carrying it around where maybe nobody can see it, or it's tightly boxed up. But it's there, just because it's boxed up, or we've learned to carry it for many, many years does not mean it does not affect us. Because it does. And it steals our ability or steals from our ability to be mellow. So think about it. Right? If if if the anger you're carrying out its fiery, if the anxiety you're carrying around is, you know described a certain way. Like think about the characteristics of when you are feeling dysregulated or the shit that you're carrying around. How could you benefit from smoothing out those rough edges from softening the intensity? What would free from harshness look like? Because think about this right? If smooth or soft, do not feel accessible to you. What is one step back from harshness? What's two steps back three steps back four steps back. And as I've said in recent episodes, when we're talking about balancing pitta, maybe what we talk about is softening the intensity, smoothing the intensity out. It's just a question for you. Right? How might this apply to you and meet you where you are right now? So today, I'm offering a lot of options to help you to support you, and they fall within to Canada. glories of iron Veta has seven guiding principles for self care that I like to share. And these two that we're talking about today are taking it easy and abundant and restful sleep. We're gonna talk about both of these principles, generally, and also through the lens of summer as well. So when it comes to taking it easy, we're talking about a few different things. And I'll be covering about seven to be exact. And, as always, don't forget that this is not an exhaustive list, exhaustive list, I hope it's not exhausting either. So the first one is hobbies, something that you do for pleasure. And back in January, I was talking about all of my annoyance with how the word pleasure in our uptight American society, for those of you who are listening, and you're not immersed in American society, I'm wondering if it's the same where you live as well. But here in America, the word pleasure is mostly associated with sexual gratification, which sexual pleasure is amazing if all people involved are consultants, consenting adults, and it should not at all be demonized or some, you know, hush hush topic. And I bring this up, because when I'm facilitating in certain spaces, and I say the word pleasure, there's a change in the airs if I said some forbidden word. So I want to be clear that when I say pleasure, yes, of course, it can be sexual gratification again, if all parties involved are consenting adults. And pleasure also means according to the Googler, happy satisfaction and enjoyment, so when it comes to hobbies, I'm happy for you to have happy satisfaction and enjoyment in any way. Again, as long as consent is involved, it could absolutely be sex, and it could also be any activity that gives you joy. Unfortunately, as adults, there's not a lot of time open for hobbies, like sports that you might enjoy or activities that you'd like to enjoy things you'd like to go and do, especially outside of the house. Whether that's because those with marginalized identities, and particularly by bipoc, folks, you know, we having to work extra for less, or because the systems tell us that we must work hard at all costs, and leisure must be earned. As a result, there is not enough time and also a whole lot of guilt for people when they actually do make the time. But my friends, remember allowing yourself time to do whatever brings you joy is essential. So fucking do it. And screw the guilt. That's what I have to say about that in a nutshell. Hobbies, what are they maybe you haven't done one in a while maybe it's been put on the backburner for whatever circumstances in your life. I know, for me, since I had kids, you know, I didn't I've talked about this a lot. You know, I'm not that person who. And when I say that person, I'm not at all this is not without judgment, I should say this is not with judgment. You know, but I'm not the person that lost myself in terms of my kids, and my kids needs and like showing up for them. I'm not that person. I think I lost myself in in my identities. Because it was either I was working, or I was parenting. And I felt also that I had just changed a lot. And I didn't really know what I liked anymore. So I've had to figure out what my hobbies are now as a 41 year old person.