So I'd like to invite anybody who'd like to start off, start us off with the first question, which is what does self empathy mean to you? And I will keep the time.
Can you just give a quick context here, just in case Sushil is not familiar with what?
Yeah, sure. Yeah. Um, so Oh, Dwayne is here. Great. Colin is also here Hi, everyone.
I Dwayne
was on mute, I'm talking, hey, Dwayne, hey Collins logic adverse, make it out, let me just give a quick context of what we're doing. We're working on a training a new training cohort. And it's
kind of kind of explore the topic. And I did put the link in to where we're developing the training, it's defining empathy.com/workshop. And you can check that out later. And you're just saying that you want to start a site, the empathy circle, we have an hour and a half? Do you want to explain it? I just posted the question in there. Priyanka. Yeah. So um, we are we thought we are if you have any better suggestions, please let us know. But I thought that we have one end up hour, so we can spend equal time on each of the questions. So we divide that into 4040 minutes, 40 minutes each, and then towards the end, like a five to seven minutes of a harvest and a summary of what we've spoken about. And the project that I'm working on. I'm focusing on self empathy. And what I found in the literature is that self empathy often gets mixed up with self compassion, and etc, etc. So when we're trying to promote the empathy circle, it becomes difficult to explain to people because we don't have a definition working definition of what it means to us. So what we're trying to do is we're trying to come up with a definition of what it means to us in the context of the circle. And so the first question,
Edwin, shall we start off, I don't think there'll be many more people coming. So I think. Yeah, okay. So I'll be keeping the time. All of us are experienced in the circle. So I'll not go through the instructions. But is there somebody who would like to kick us off with the first question? How do you define self empathy with someone like to be volunteer to be the first speaker? Thank you. So Sheila,
oh, how many turns? Five minutes each? Is that okay? Okay.
It's interesting, you said, the difference between self empathy and self compassion, so I'm not sure I'm gonna, this is what I think it is. And this, you know, I didn't study it just because I wanted not to just give you textbook stuff, so. Alright, so in self empathy, Sheila,
would you like to pick an active listener?
First? Oh, we're
gonna do it that we're gonna do with the empathy circle model. Oh, no. Oh, okay. This is good. Sure. How about Dwayne. Hi, Dwayne. I've worked with you before so yeah,
maybe you're listening.
I don't know Do you want to repeat back already what I said
Can we start over? Okay. I,
I thought it was interesting that it Priyanka Priyanka said that there's a difference between self empathy and self compassion. So I didn't read the literature anything about it because I wanted to. I didn't want to just repeat back what I read. So what I feel about it is self empathy. It's kind of tuning into how I'm feeling in each month. moments so that I can listen to whether I need attention. So that might be self compassion, but and then letting myself know that I'm safe. I'm okay. So I'm not sure I know exactly what self
is. But okay, I stopped there. Okay. As you were explaining to Priyanka, earlier, you made it a point to not do any research or look up any definitions of what self empathy might be. Because you'd want to just give a book definition. And she drew this distinction between self empathy and like self compassion and stuff. And so you're not sure about what you were going to say. But you want it to just be directly in your, in your definition is that self empathy is like, this idea of you being in touch with your own feelings, and being aware of how you're feeling and how things are affecting you. And I missed the last part.
That's pretty good. I don't remember it either. So
can I ask you to remember to pause? In between? Yeah, a
little bit more? A little bit more? Yeah. Yeah, so thinking about more self empathy, I would say that, I would also try to repeat to myself what I'm actually think I am, I'm experiencing or if I have a, what I what I said, if that's what I really pop, so I can listen to what I'm actually saying or feeling.
When you're thinking about self empathy, for you, it's more about having an awareness about what you're saying and feeling. And, and thinking about that and wondering if that's really what you wanted to communicate.
Yeah, and,
and hearing, hearing that back, sometimes it's, there's something deeper underneath so I, I can ask myself, or what, what, what is it? You know, go go, tell me, tell me more about what, what's your what's going on here.
And reflecting back on what you've shared earlier, you're thinking about it on even a different level, meaning self empathy for you is really thinking deeply about what you communicated and having an understanding with yourself as to what that whether or not that's really your intention is knowing that that's what you really want it to communicate.
Yeah, I think what, what thinking about having self empathy, kind of gives me more time to reflect or pause on what I'm thinking or saying so that I like I'm actually paying attention to what I'm saying.
Having so empathy in summary is for you is really about paying attention. You know, having an awareness paying attention about what you're saying. As you're saying, Thank you. I feel heard. Thank you. And now, I will speak about self empathy and I will pick someone, Larry, which you'd like to be my listener.
Happy to Dwayne ready
just thing for me. I also similar to to Sheila, I didn't do any research on this. On this idea of self employed
So Dwayne, I'm hearing you say, initially, it's interesting. And then you said for me for yourself, you also didn't do any, I think you said research on this particular topic.
Yes. Because I thought that, in my mind, the idea of self empathy was relatively obvious for me.
And when I hear you saying that, for you, it was already evident, it was self evident, it was already obvious what self Empathy means for you.
Cuz, for me, self empathy is also tied into my self awareness, my self esteem, because I view the world the way I feel about myself, to do that lens.
So I think you're saying kind of your, for you, your definition of self empathy, is how you see yourself, and how you see the world through that lens of self empathy, something like that.
Yeah, my self esteem provides me with the capacity to experience self empathy.
And it's your self esteem, that gives you the capacity to experience self empathy.
So if I'm feeling good about who I am, I have a greater capacity, to feel self empathy, to be present to have this awareness of how I'm experiencing things.
So I'm hearing you say that if you feel good about yourself, then this gives you kind of the foundation for seeing everything else.
Yes, and so if I'm not feeling good about myself, if I don't have a positive sense of self, my capacity to be self empathetic, is reduced, or may not even be present.
And I'm hearing you say that if you don't have a positive view about yourself, then your capacity to have kind of empathy for anyone else is reduced or diminished, or maybe completely eliminated.
Yes. And so for me, when, when I practice, when I'm involved in participating in an empathy circle, it's really important for me to pause for a moment or two before I enter the circle, and do a self check.
So when I'm hearing you say that for you, before you enter an empathy circle, it's important to pause. Do a self check before
the circle? Yeah. And be mindful, yes.
To pause, and not only pause, but to actually be mindful, or kind of aware of what's going on what's alive in you kind of?
Yeah, yes. And
when I'm able to do that, to, to pause and to reflect. And to think about myself first and how I'm feeling and what's important to me, and why I'm here. I can be more empathetic. When I'm involved in the empathy circles.
And by pausing and getting in touch with yourself, then you can use that awareness to kind of use that foundation of awareness to be empathic with everyone in the group, something like that.
Yes. And, and so for me, self empathy really is about having a connection with myself. Being mindful and being aware of who I am, where how I'm feeling before entering into a conversation or interaction with someone else, and during the conversation with somebody.
So Dwayne, I'm hearing you say that for you. Self empathy is being aware of what's alive in you before you enter into a conversation with someone else.
Yes, thank you, Larry. I feel fully heard.
Thanks for joining. Colin, will you be my listener?
I'm sure, Laurie.
Thank you, Colin. So I enjoying the conversation and the topic. And I made some little notes to myself. When I wrote my little definition of self empathy, I kind of made it up on the spot. I'll stop there.
Okay, so that sounds like you're having fun, you're enjoying how things are proceeding proceeding so far. And you are. You're going to give us your definition of stuff out there without having thought about it before.
Thank you, Colin. And what I wrote down was unconditional acceptance of self and others in nature.
Okay, so for you it means self acceptance, unconditional self acceptance, or unconditional acceptance of self, of others and of nature.
Exactly. And then what came was being aware of any blocks to empathy for yourself, and others, and nature.
And also this awareness of any blocks that might be there is important.
Yes. So this kind of being in the now so to speak, is an awareness of it all.
So, we're being really present appearance now gives us this awareness of everything.
Right. And that might be a joyful awareness.
And it could be that it's a positive experience.
And I would add that, when it is a joyful experience, that's kind of a shared joy.
Okay. So it's not a joy that you hold within yourself. It's a it's a joy to share with others.
Yes. And there might be a concern in awareness.
Okay, so there might be, like a concern and awareness.
And when that concern is shared, it becomes a shared concern.
Okay, by sharing this concern, then it's it's not just with you.
Right. So that's kind of touching on the topic of just last the term. Oh, I think it's called contagion, or contagious. Emotion. emotional contagion, I think was the term that was has been used in emotional contagion.
Okay, so struggling to find the right strain. But you've settled on the next question, emotional contagion to describe this, the shared joy or shared concern.
And I'd like to differentiate emotional contagion from empathy.
Okay, so there's a difference between emotional contagion and empathy.
I would say that in empathy, I, myself and each one who's practicing true empathy recognizes that they have agency.
Okay, so when you're practicing empathy, you have this agency or this power?
Yes. So you have responsibility for your own life experience.
So we have, so we're responsible for ourselves,
right? And we have choices. We have freewill, we have choices.
So this choices, there's always choices.
Right? So the idea that someone else is the cause of my emotion is not taking responsibility.
When we, I mean, we should be taking responsibility. It's not that someone else is responsible for how we feel.
Exactly. And if we ever blamed someone outside of this, that's giving away our responsibility.
So, yes, we're giving away our responsibility and we're pushing, pushing it onto other people.
Exactly. And that's not fun.
Okay. So that's yeah, that's not. Yeah, that's not pleasant.
Right? There's no shared joy when it comes to blaming someone outside of us.
Okay, so then, yeah, it's not possible to share this experience of joy before playing the blame game.
So then we get to see that we're actually creating, in a sense, our experience based on the choices we're making.
Okay, so personal choices that we're making. We are the creators of our own experience.
Thank you, Colin, I feel fully for it.
Okay. I'll pick everyone listening. So I've been working with Priyanka and with with Edwin in the, in this project to define empathy. And so I have thought about this a little beforehand.
Yeah, you're working with me and Priyanka on this topic. So you have some thoughts about it, you've been working, working on it a bit.
Before recently, I never really thought about the term stuff empathy. I was unfamiliar with empathy. And I'm familiar with self compassion. But this is kind of new territory, and I'm finding it tricky to navigate.
You're familiar with empathy and with self compassion. So this is a new area, and you're finding it tricky to really navigate this.
Um, so I have a couple of ideas that I'd like to share. The first is that self empathy is it's understanding what we're experiencing. And it's at an emotional level, a somatic level and an intellectual level. And it's also about validating that experience to ourselves.
So you're, you see that self empathy is understanding oneself and it's at a somatic level and to give validation to that
not just somatic but also on an emotional level and on a mental level.
So it's mental and somatic.
Um, in I'm also doing an MVC course, and Priyanka is aware of this. And self empathy is a topic that has come up this week. And there it's loosely defined as welcoming our judgments, feeling our feelings fully, and fully connecting to our needs.
And you're doing an NBC course, and they talk about it self empathy, and it's about error. That was one of it was it's it's tapping into one's feelings and needs. Right, basically,
and also welcoming our judgments and seeing the wisdom in our judgments. Yeah, and
and not suppressing judgments, but welcoming judgment and see the wisdom within the judgments.
And then when I think back to my training and self compassion I've come up with an idea of how self empathy might be similar to that. And so if empathy Could, could mean that we have this relationship with ourselves as if the similar relationship to a dear friend and that we, we treat ourselves like we would do a friend, especially if we're having a hard time.
So you're, you're doing self compassion, you've done self compassion, trainings, and you're sort of seeing how that overlaps with self empathy in the sense that you treat yourself as you would treat a good good friend.
So um you know, that there's different angles to come up to this to define self empathy. But I think at its heart it's about connecting with ourselves on a deep deeper level and showing understanding ourselves and doing good for ourselves
so you're seeing that it's there's challenge with with understanding self empathy, but it comes it's down comes down to understanding ourselves think those bit more to it
and connecting, really connecting with ourselves
so it's understanding and really connecting with ourselves
right? I mean, this connection is not just through our thoughts it's also through our feelings and through you know, through our body
just somebody just arrived or just letting them in. So it's it's really connecting with ourselves with our thoughts and with our feelings.
Right and our and our body in our body experience, body experience. Thank you, I feel fully heard.
We're just doing empathy circle, Ruth, and I'm just going to speak to Priyanka. And the questions
are me Yes. With that in the chat,
and that's it, so I'll speak to Priyanka you're muted. Are there Priyanka or did we lose you? Priyanka is in India and sometimes her connection goes out so are you there Priyanka. Okay, I'll speak to Susheela, then hopefully, Priyanka will come back. She dropped out. Yeah, I think this is a great topic to self empathy. One, I hope we can popularize it, like self compassion was quite popularized by Kristin Neff. And so I hope we can popularize the self empathy like that.
Yeah, so you you're interested in if, if you can, this is an interesting topic and possibly popular popularize it. Self empathy is along the lines that that Neff popular popularized self compassion.
And my definition would be the feeling sensing into self. So that's into one's own feelings and thoughts and feelings. So that's the core of my definition.
And your core definition is feeling and sensing into yourself is self efficacy.
Yeah. And I would say that, if we were to compare it to, like self compassion, the concept of self compassion, by definition, compassion is addressing suffering. And I see that as kind of a, you know, a, you know, a focus on the nature of suffering. Whereas empathy is kind of a sensing into the full experience, like all experiences. So that's kind of a difference I see between compassion and empathy. that empathy is sensing joy and creativity and, you know, as well as maybe negative, like painful feelings, too. So it's that full spectrum of the full spectrum of experiences, what I see empathy being and self empathy.
Yeah, and if you were to compare self compassion as being more of
the word
self compassion,
okay. So suffering, the suffering is suffering and where self empathy is more of the full spectrum, from the positive joy and creativity expression, and as well as the things that are more Part A painful or unpleasant?
Yeah, so, for me self compassion would be a subset of self empathy. That would be just to put that in the context.
You went a little bit unclear in the video. So can you restate that? Please? Yeah,
I would just say that self compassion is a subset of self empathy. That's how I do it.
Okay, this is the word subset. So you feel that self compassion is a subset of self
empathy. And there's different practices that have have talked about self empathy. And, as Colin has mentioned, the MVC, so MVC is like sense into yourself for the feelings you have, like, like, we're working on this project. And some people will say, Oh, I feel confusion, right. So feeling sensing the confusion about a definition. So that's the first thing so I sent some confusion in my body.
So looking at the component of NVC, as of sensing into your feelings, and the and then being with that, whatever your you're feeling in your ears, giving it time to be expressed and felt and experienced.
And the the with NVC nonviolent communication has the process, you know, based on empathy, that it's like, you sense the confusion. And then you say, you sort of like ask, what are the needs? What is the feeling behind that, like, if I have confusion, I want the feeling of clarity, for example. And so and that would be a need. And so they're, they're saying, there's feelings that you have and feelings basically, that you desire that are behind the feelings that might be behind you that you have. So sensing into oneself saying, Oh, I'm feeling confusion. And I really would like the feeling of clarity.
So using the methods or process of nonviolent communication, of sensing into what you're feeling, like confusion, and then actually last part, looking for the need, looking for the needs, right? Right. So looking, so once you sense into the feelings, then you look into what the needs are, and then the confusion might really be something else. And
yeah, and there's that confusion, there's the feeling of confusion, but you want clarity, you have the desire for the feeling or the need of clarity. So that's, yeah, that's a big part of that process.
So sensing into the feelings of confusion, what you really are looking for or discovering is that you have a need or clarity.
Yeah, I feel fully heard. Thank you. You're welcome.
You're up against a shia sect lecture listener?
Are we going to go to the second question or is this
I had Priyanka or Ruth do the first question yet. So you might want to speak to one of them.
Okay, so I'm, so I'm going to be talking and Ruth is going to, I can ask you so listen, are my listening to Ruth. Okay. Do you want to have Ruth talk first? No, you're the speaker on this listener. Okay. Okay. Okay. I will select Ruth, would you like to be my listener?
Yeah, I'd love to thanks. Okay.
So listening to everybody's explanations on self empathy. I I can see that there's I mentioned that it's a sensing into what I'm or listening for what I'm experiencing and feeling. And then I've gotten more clarity about self empathy is also about having the ability to go deeper into what what's really going on as far as what are my my needs in the situation? What are those feelings telling me about my needs?
Yeah, so you've been listening to what other people have been saying. And it's so you kind of getting a sense that it's that self empathy is feeling into your responses, and getting some clarity on the needs underneath those feelings.
Yeah, and just like I, you know, if I was having empathy for another person self empathy would be just allowing that space to, you know, to be okay with what's happening. And and also responsible for choosing how I'm going to respond.
Yeah, so you think just as we would, or you would have empathy for another? You would do that for yourself. And choose your responses. Is that what you said?
Yeah, I would, I would allow, allow space for them to for that, for whatever is arising and then have compassion or? No, I would be responsible for how I would feel how I would react.
Yes, so whatever come up, comes up. You would accept it and take responsibility for it. You Yeah. With compassion, self compassion.
Could I be complete now? Do I have to keep going? Okay, whenever you're right. I'll be complete now. Thank you, Ruth.
Thank you. So now, can I ask Priyanka, to be my listener, please? Yeah. I'm listening.
Okay. I'm getting the feeling you've already aired. Sorry. You've already discussed this quite thoroughly. So hope I'm not going to repeat anything. Yeah, that's it.
So you have a feeling that we've discussed this thoroughly. And you're hoping that you won't repeat anything?
I probably will. So my thoughts on self empathy are. Yeah, it was interesting. The distinction you made between that and self compassion, because I, I thought, I just assumed they were pretty much overlapping. But it's nice to have that stronger distinction. Yeah.
Yeah. So you thought that says empathy and self compassion was similar, but it's nice to have that distinction?
Yeah. So self empathy can include, you know, not suffering, just whatever's going on. And being in touch, from my point of view, staying in touch with how I'm feeling in response to what other people are saying. And also being a bit grounded with it as well. That makes sense.
So self empathy for you is being grounded as well as being in touch with what what's going on within you, so that you can respond to other people appropriately?
Yeah, I think just to sort of go a bit deeper with be staying in touch with what I'm feeling rather than letting my feelings focus entirely on the other person. So keeping a modicum of empathy for myself in the process. Yeah, because I can tend to sort of go out of myself rather than Oh, or yet kind of not notice the little messages I'm getting from myself.
Yeah, so you have a tendency to like go out of yourself and fully focus on the other person and not move what's going on within you. So self empathy is also being in touch with yourself as well as the other person and listening to the other person. Yes,
yeah. And with that, accepting whatever's going on, you know, like if something I wasn't expecting or some unwanted emotion, or confusing emotion. Yeah, get having the capacity to. I mean, it's a practice, isn't it, but to just say, just let that be not trying to push it away.
Yeah. So also accepting what's going on within you and not just pushing things away. Being okay with whatever is happening.
Yes. Yeah. And I like what Edwin said about actually recognizing if there's a need there. That's really important. Because yeah, there might be a strong need to. Yeah, do something completely different. You know that. Yeah. So
yeah. Recognizing that there's a need there is really important.
Yeah, it could get overlooked. It's like, yeah, what's the point of self empathy? If we're just going to say, oh, yeah, that's fair. And not recognize that there might be a need. Even if we can't meet it. It's still good to pinpoint. Oh, that's, that's my value. That's my need. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah, because it could get overlooked. And it's really nice to just pinpoint and say, That's my knee. That's what I need right now.
Yeah. Yeah. And I think I was just saying, you know, that it's, it's actually you can't leave that bit out. Otherwise, I don't think it would be completely self empathy. Yeah. Yeah.
It wouldn't be self empathy if you left that bit about the needs out. Yes.
Thank you. I feel fully heard. Thank you. Thank you.
I'm
doing would you be willing to listen to me? Yes. Okay, yeah. So for me, self empathy is life saving.
For you self empathy, Priyanka is lifesaver.
I think if we can teach more people about self empathy, we could save many lives.
Teaching more people about saints for you teaching more people about self empathy would save lives.
I'm from India, and in the traditional Indian education system. I was never nobody in school ever taught me about self empathy, or listening to myself, or understanding what I'm going through. We did hear a lot like we had this model education classes where we did hear a lot of preaching about be kind to others and give to others. But it never went the other way around. Like, I never heard that.
Growing up you're, you're raised in the traditional Indian school in India. And there wasn't any mention about anything like self empathy, self awareness, about being in touch with your own feelings. You were educated on moral issues and, and being aware of moral concepts, but there was no mention about self and self awareness and self image and things.
Yeah, I meant moral education in the sense of giving to others. You know, being generous to others, listening to others, but I was I never heard anybody say, be kind to yourself, or listen to yourself. Yeah.
Okay, when
you speak about moral education, it was more about giving to others are doing for others, listening to others be kind to others. But there wasn't any emphasis on doing those things for free yourself, being kind yourself listening to yourself.
Yeah. And I honestly grew up thinking that if I would do anything for myself, it was selfish.
The way you were raised that if you did something for yourself if you focus on taking care of you yourself it was considered selfish or selfishness.
Yeah. And I'm an educator myself. And I interact with a lot of young people in there who are in the age group between like 18 to 22. And they've just become adults, but they don't know how to do adulting I hope you understand what I mean. And I noticed a lot of them have so many issues around self esteem, and the education system in India, it's really hard, it's very competitive. And they, they have a very tough time dealing with their emotions, because nobody ever taught them how to do it.
You're an educator, and a really, as you described, challenging, tough Indian Indian system. And as an educator, you work with a lot of young adults 18 to 22. And they receive a really good education, but they're not very good at adulting as you defined it, being a responsible person making healthy decisions for themselves. And there's a lot of issues with this group of people with around areas of self esteem and, and making relate to her emotional health and things like that.
And many of them suffer from anxiety, depression. And so I think when if we can teach them, not just the empathy circle, but also self empathy, we can save many lives from many people's lives by just leaving an empty life. Because when you really, for me says empathy is going inside yourself, and understanding what you're going through without judgment. So if we can teach people how to do that, I think they could live more fulfilling lives.
You, you also share that in this age group, there's a lot of a lot of people we're dealing with issues of anxiety and depression, like you said, suffered from these things. And really, self empathy is about going inside yourself and, and having awareness of self and, and where you're feeling where you are. And it's your understanding or feeling that if you're able to teach people about self empathy, or you know, not necessarily practicing empathy circles, but just having this idea of empathy and self care, but the would actually save lives Indian.
Thank you doing I feel fully heard. Thank you. So, Edwin, should we move on to the next question?
Sure. Up to you. Sure.
Okay, so I'm going to ants. So Dwayne, would you pick a listen answer the second question, please?
Sure. Let's see. Ruth, would you like to be my listener?
Yeah, hello, Dwayne. Yeah.
And so I'm gonna answer the second question, what does self empathy mean to me in the context of an empathy circle?
Oh, yes. So you're going to answer the question number two, what does self empathy mean in the context of empathy?
Yes, and it's interesting, because I actually addressed that in my first answer, about what self Empathy means to me, but I'll reflect back on that.
Yeah, what interestingly, you address that in your when you answered question one, but you're gonna reflect back on it.
Yes. For me, self empathy. And it's really about having self awareness. And it's tied to my self esteem.
So for you, it's about having self awareness and it's you Yeah, tied in with your self esteem.
And for me, before I enter into an empathy, circle space, it's really important that I take time to be reflective, to be mindful to be present, and to make sure I'm feeling good about who I am.
So yeah, before you and you know, before you begin, join an empathy circle, you, you find it, you think it's really important to take some time to ground and reflect and be mindful about how you actually are, so that you feel present for the circle.
Because it's my understanding that I'm going to experience this entire process through my self esteem.
So you're gonna experience this whole process, through the lens of your self esteem.
And so in order for me to be able to have the capacity to share or to be empathic during the process, it's really important for me that I'm able to experience being so empathic or experiencing self empathy.
Yeah, so yeah, in order for you to contribute and be present in the circle, it's really important that you are feeling self empathy for yourself. Before you go in. Yeah, like a preparation.
And I can give you an example. I have a mechanical heart valve. And I take blood thinners every day.
So when example Yeah, you're you have a mechanical heart valve, and you need to take blood thinners everyday.
So about a half an hour, and one of the things that happens is I at times experience frequent nosebleeds.
And one of the things that happens as a result is that you experience a lot of nose, nosebleeds or frequent nosebleeds.
And the last time I had a nosebleed I had to I was in the emergency room twice to four hours for them to stop these nosebleeds.
So last time, it happened, you ended up in the emergency room twice, for a really long time in order to stop this nosebleeds.
Oh, right, half an hour before I entered this circle today, my nose started to bleed. And I immediately, Lee went back to the last experience of my nose bleeding.
So yeah, half an hour before the circle started, your nose began to bleed again. And you were taken back to that experience previously.
And it's a really presencing and grounding experience. And so I really, at first, I thought I remembered the challenging experience of being in the emergency room, and they're not being able to stop my nose bleed. And I thought, Oh, my goodness, what if my nose doesn't stop bleeding?
Yeah, so this was a very, as you said, presencing experience where? You know, you were concerned in the waiting room? The real possibility, what if my nose doesn't stop bleeding? was like a wake up for you?
Yes. And so I really, you know, had to think about quickly like, okay, am I going to be able to participate in the circle? And, you know, getting stopping my nose from bleeding and really focusing on myself for a moment, because I said I've stopped.
Yeah, so the thoughts ran through your mind. Am I going to be able to participate in this circle and you needed to care for yourself. Do everything It was necessary to care for yourself in order to get your nose to stop bleeding, presumably.
In summary, because my time is up, I was able to stop my nose from bleeding. And I made sure that I had a minute or two, before I joined the circle, to really ground myself to, to be mindful. And to let go of that experience, to open myself to be prepared, prepare to share in this experience.
So yeah, so you needed a minute or two, between sorting that out and making yourself better and starting the circle so that you could ground yourself and mentally prepared to be open to the circle.
Yes, thank you, Ruth. I feel fully heard.
Thanks. So now I need to choose someone. Larry, would you listen?
Please? Yes.
Cool. So I haven't got a time. Am I supposed to someone let me know. rambling on? I'm
taking care of the time.
All right. Thank you. Yeah. So yes, speaking of before the session, sorry, I late I, I was lying down trying to meditate before the session, and I became very, very sleepy. And then I realized I didn't have the link. So I kind of lost my composure that I had built up in the meditation.
So Ruth, I'm hearing you're sharing that. Speaking of the topic of kind of preparing yourself for a circle, like Dwayne was describing, that you were laying down and meditating and being at peace being kind of one with the infinite universe and perfect. And then, right before it was time to log in, you realize, I don't have the link. And then this kind of infinite peace was gone with the wind. You didn't say that? Something like that?
Yeah, it was blown. Definitely, it was blown. And it's only just now I'm starting to feel a bit more settled. I could kind of I could hear it in my voice when I was reflecting back free anchors. what she was saying. I felt that tension there. Yeah.
And after being in the circle for a little while, you're starting to notice this calming down. And you're, you're saying that you could hear it in your voice? And I'm not sure if you were saying you could hear the tension or hear the relaxing in your voice when you were reflecting back, I think to Priyanka
Yeah, so yeah, I could, I could sense the tension. I was practicing self empathy. Yeah, sensing where I was, tensing up, and trying to kind of release it with the breath. Yep.
Practicing the self awareness, self empathy, noticing where there's tension, just being aware of that. And then practicing slow breathing. And kind of, I think you're saying, watching it melt away something like that.
Yeah, it's more poetic than I would. But yes, thank you. I feel fully heard. Thanks.
Thank you, Bruce, did you want to stop there? Yeah, I'm hearing you say that. That's you feel fully bird. And
you have Yeah, it's my time.
Oh, is your time? I'm sorry. I didn't see the time. Indication go up. Okay. And so this last reflection, I'm hearing you say? Something like, sounds like something Rumi would say or maybe it's kind of poetic, but it's expressing what you wanted to say. And you feel fully heard Thank you. So Colin, will you be my listener? Thanks for calling. I'm just really enjoying what Ruth was sharing. I can I can feel that share.
Hmm, sounds like you're really enjoying this and especially what Ruth just shared, you're really feeling it?
Yeah, I think we've all had that experience of, you know, we're kind of making plans, or maybe joining a circle. So we'll sit down and get centered.
This is something a familiar experience for many of us were beforehand, we're trying to compose ourselves.
And then maybe the phone rings or there's a knock on the door, or there's some kind of interruption to peace.
This peace and harmony that we're trying to create a suddenly interrupted.
And I guess it could go all the way up to what we commonly call an amygdala hijack.
So on, on the level of the brain, this is called the amygdala hijack.
Yeah, it could be just a slight disturbance. Or it could go all the way up to the level of what we would commonly call amygdala hijack.
So it could be an amygdala hijack, which is kind of at the top level, or it might just be some kind of slight disturbance,
right. And so when we're in the amygdala hijack, the prefrontal cortex is really turned way down in its ability to function.
So the southern part of the brain called the prefrontal cortex is, turns down, while the amygdala is turned up. Right,
when the amygdala is turned up, then we're in the fight or flight or freeze, and creative empathy is out the window are gone with the wind.
So when we're in this state of fight, flight, or freeze, it's, it's just really difficult to be empathic. It's,
it's practically impossible to be empathic with ourselves, or others or nature.
So you're just clarifying that further, it's almost impossible to be empathic no matter who it is with, with ourselves with others or with with other living beings.
And then it would include the kind of the subset of, well really, it's the same people within the circle.
And also, people within the circle.
Yes, and when a human being is experiencing, that amygdala hijack, and that consequential lack of empathy
so this is happening when when our major was hijacked and and we're not able to show empathy.
Right? Then I would say that lack of empathy fosters and allegiance and I'll stop there.
Okay, so this this lack of empathy, it's it's creating this allegiance for want of a better word.
Thank you. And allegiance to a hierarchy of power over
across strength and allegiance to a hierarchy of power over
Yes. Because in the fear, there's the reflex reaction of survival.
So if the sweet reflex reaction to survive, that's the comes from the fear.
Right? And that results in the belief that the disconnected self needs to be able to fight or flee from some external threat.
Okay, and that leads us to believe that we need to get away to either fight or flee that situation
right now And we've only been repeating this for 1000s of years.
So this has been going on a long time, many 1000s of years.
Thanks. Okay, hold up the timer. I don't know if you saw that.
I feel fully heard. Thank you.
Thank you, Laurie. Um, I will choose Bianca. Okay. So, well, I've been doing a bit of thinking on this before also, and but before, before I share my thoughts on how we can use this in the circle, I've come up with a new definition for myself a working definition of what self empathy may be. And I'm summarizing it as connecting and understanding self through body, heart and mind.
Yeah, so you've given it some thought. And you've come up with a working definition, which is connecting,
can you help me out again, calling, connecting and understanding self through body heart and mind
connecting and understanding self through body, heart and mind?
So first of all, I'd like to, to go back to what Dwayne was saying about the importance of preparing ourselves and showing before we go into the empathy circle, by by showing ourselves empathy, I think that's a, that's a really important practice. And it's something that I'm going to take on in future.
So you really liked what they doing said about preparing yourself for the circle. And you're going to practice that in the future.
Because I was I was just thinking of the time in the circle. But you know, the energy that we that we bring with us is so has a real effect on how we show up and whether we are able to be fully present. Whether we are able to show empathy for others and for ourselves. Yeah, so
you didn't you thought a lot about within the circle, but you never thought about what happens before. But it's really important because the energy that you bring to the circle determines how you should show up in the circle, and what energy you bring with you.
I'll share how I got it sir before but I'll, I'll share one small circle. And that is, I had a real need to practice self empathy, as a as a new, a new person in the empathy circle movement. And that's because I was struggling at the beginning.
You were struggling in the beginning. And so you had a real need to practice self empathy.
I found it difficult to focus and to really reflect back everything that I heard and these feelings are coming up that I was no good at it.
Yeah, so you found it difficult to focus. And the feeling that came up for you was that you were no, you were not good at it.
So this is making it even harder to focus and even harder to reflect back. And by practicing self empathy, by first of all, validating that feeling, yes, I'm feeling bad for what of a better word that that can help me to let go of the, of the feeling damaged attachment and focus better.
Yeah, so by validating the feeling you were able to focus better, because by validating it, it helps you to Team, Team, those those feelings, those negative feelings.
And I had another experience where I needed to practice self empathy. And that was when I was in my facilitation training. And I was given a challenge that was beyond what I was expecting and beyond what I was able to cope with at the time.
So you were given a challenge that you could not cope with at the time and so you had to practice self and be there also.
Right. The reason I'm mentioning this is because in that role, I was facilitator. And what I'm trying to say is that in all the roles facilitator, passive listener, active listener A speaker, there's a need to practice self empathy.
Yeah, so there's a need to practice self empathy, all the rules, even as a facilitator.
And even when we're not, when we're only the passive listener, it's also an opportunity to practice empathy. For example. Okay, for example, I'm maybe feeling tired, or struggling, struggling with my thoughts and feelings. I can, I can take, I can choose to practice empathy in that moment, even when I'm just a passive listener.
So even when you're just a passive listener, you can practice self empathy, because in that moment, you might be feeling tired or
under resourced. Right? Yes, and time is up. So I'll leave it at that. I fully, fully fully heard. Thank you. Thank you calling.
So Sheila, would you be willing to listen to me?
Yes, I would. Thank you.
Yeah, for me, self empathy in the circle, like I really was touched by doing story and how visceral it was with the blood, you know, bleeding, the bleeding nose and the worry about coming to the circle. I mean, I think it's a good metaphor also for how we show up in the circle, like what Colin was talking about.
Yeah, so we were really touched by and thinking about Sanford empathy, Dwayne story about his, his nosebleeds and how, how that
how that and how he helped, dealing with that, and being preparing and getting ready to be present for the circle really touched you?
Yeah, to you? Yeah. So I think it's a good metaphor for not just like the physical, but also the mental and emotional wounds that we bring to the circle.
So it's a really good metaphor for the whole thing of the emotional and mental and wounds and preparations that we bring to the circle.
Yeah. And I don't know, maybe, even sometimes I need people in the circle that I don't like. Or they're seeing something I don't like. Man,
sometimes you leave people in the circle you don't like or you? And
something I don't like? Or like seeing something I don't like,
yeah, that you they may be, you just don't like them, or they're saying something you don't like.
And I don't know the reason sometimes why I don't like someone. Like it's in the circle. It's too hard for me to analyze why I don't really like someone, but it just happens as a natural reaction to this person.
Yeah, and you don't really know why you don't like what they who they are what they said, but it's like a natural reaction.
And I immediately have a judgment in my head, like Priyanka, you're in an empathy circle, and you're hating people. Like what kind of empathy practitioner are you?
And having those thoughts about not liking people or what they're saying, it's, it brings out a self judgment in you about why are you why are you doing this and an empathy circle.
And then what I do is I start forming. I mean, this is another one like Laurie was talking about fees, fright, flight and freeze, but there's another thing called fawning, which is like I just pretend to like them and I smile a lot when when I actually don't because I want to be a good person.
And not not something it's not exactly fight flight or freeze, but it's called something fawning. And that's when you smile and you pretend that you liked them and you want to you want to appear to be a good person. Which is
which you can judge how that's going to go because that's a total disaster. If I do that in life, right? I can't pretend for a very long time. The bad option would be to become aware of why why is what is this person triggering in me? Why am I feeling this way? Or what am I feeling? Why is this person learning this way in me? And try to sort that within me? Because more often than not, it's not about the other person, but it's all about me.
Yeah, and this this behavior of finding and pretending is, is a is a recipe for disaster in in not only circles but in life. And a better option would be to be more aware of what's going on, and what's triggering that in you, and and then having some self empathy to figure out what, what what's going on.
Yeah. And the challenge in the circle is to do that, to listen to myself, but also listen to others. And so it's like, where do I put my attention? And I think with practice, I can do both. I think it's possible, but it takes a lot of practice.
Yeah, and it's an it's very challenging for you to both pay attention to your inner self, and then listen, or, you know, pay attention to what people are saying. It's very challenging, but with practice, you can feel that you're getting more experience doing both. It's more able.
Thank you. So Sheila, I feel fully heard.
Thank you. Welcome.
So it's my turn now. Let's see. I will ask, Colin?
Sure. Yes.
All right. Thank you. So okay, let me just compose here. The circle. I think what I've heard people say, and the preparation is very important for having self empathy in the circle. So that whatever's I could kind of clear my clear my mind and become present.
So you're just taking a moment at the beginning to compose yourself. And then then you actually started talking about how composing, composing yourself was important to have a clear mind and being present. Yeah,
and I guess I've never heard of the word fawning. But I know what that I've known people. I've done that myself probably in the past. And
it made me think about,
you know, how I, how I bring myself authentically and honestly to the circle. And I don't have to tell people exactly what I'm thinking. But if I'm aware of it, and I'm, I'm wondering why I do something or think something. I can bring myself more quickly back to being present.
Okay, so you started off talking about fawning? It's a new term for you. But you know, it could well have done it in the past. And then you talked about then you talked about just remind me what that was.
That when when I do something, that it's about being honest with bringing my authentic self, but I don't want to necessarily tell them what I'm thinking, but I can bring myself back to the present moment, by being aware of what I'm my own awareness of what I'm thinking.
Okay, thanks for repeating. So, yeah, it's about being authentic, being your authentic self, being honest about yourself, and, you know, being present and bringing yourself back to the moment. I think you said before, not necessarily sharing, sharing everything about what you're feeling, but but being authentic to yourself.
Yeah, and I think, you know, practicing. It takes a lot of practice to both be inside and outside at the same time. And that, the more we more I practice that in and outside the circle, when I come into the circle, I can, it's, it becomes a little bit easier.
So this is a practice thing. The more you practice, the easier it gets. And
I think that one of the things to be aware of again, is the needs though, like in empathy circles, especially, I'm, if it goes on really long, I can't retain it. So to, to have people do little or chunks for me is probably be having self empathy and being honest to other people.
So you've also this awareness of your own needs, you know that you find it more difficult if the effort shared with you is too long. And perhaps it's an act of self empathy is to let the other person know that you need the information in smaller pieces.
Yes, thank you. I feel fully heard.
Yes, so that's me again, talking. Okay. I will pick. I'll pick maybe Ruth this time if that's okay. I
think Edwin has it right.
Sorry, Edwin, even. Yeah, on this row. Sorry. Sorry about that. I don't. So yes, maybe just to continue where I was before.
And that is that all roles within the empathy circle, have a need to practice self empathy. And I talked last time about the facilitator and the speaker, maybe I can mention a little about a little bit about the active listener.
Okay, so you've seen that, in this empathy circle, everyone hat is has a heart with self empathy, the facilitator, the speaker, now you want to talk about the listener.
So, um, yeah, if I'm able to reflect back what the Speaker has said, as well as I'd like, then that's a moment where I can practice self empathy.
Yeah, to to reflect what the Speaker has said that in that moment, that's the space to practice self empathy.
So one thing I can do as I can, I can pause, and be open and curious to what I'm feeling in that moment, and maybe see what my need is.
So in that moment, you're seeing all you can do is you can pause, you can see and see what your need is, you can listen to it and see what your need is.
Right. And I guess I can also ask the other person to repeat as I did a moment ago, to show love and why much focus on for a moment.
And if your focus goes for a moment, you can just have the person repeat what they said.
And it's important that I don't judge myself to to critically, but rather show understanding for myself.
So
instead of judging yourself, you'd like to show understanding for yourself,
right? That this could happen to anyone and not just me.
Yeah, that you're not alone in whatever is happening.
And then another opportunity to practice the practice of empathy for myself as a, as an active listener would be when I'm triggered by something that the speaker says. And in that case, I can I can take it take care of my, you know, my feelings and needs in the moment. And then when it comes to my turn, to speak, I can address it.
So another thing you can do is if you're, if the speaker says something that triggers you, you can see what your feelings and needs are around that and then share it when it's your turn to speak.
And perhaps, it could even be the case that I temporarily leave the circle. I'm mean, that could also be a need that I have.
You may have a need to leave the circle and yeah, that could be another need kind of withdraw.
And one of the things I'd like to say in the role of facilitator. And that is that I think it's important for the facilitator to just say upfront at the beginning, in the guidelines that the important the importance of what sort of empathy The importance of self empathy and to practice self empathy and the circle.
And the facilitator could say something about the importance of self empathy is before the circle starts.
Right? Yes, and I think I'll leave it at that. I feel it's really hard.
Okay. Priyanka, can we go like an extra 15 minutes? For this? We're supposed to end in like four minutes? If it is that work for everybody is at work, Bianca?
Um, it's okay for me. How about everybody else?
I'm good with it. Yeah. Okay.
Okay. I'll speak to Dwayne. Okay, I'm ready. Um, yeah. So in terms of the circle, self empathy, I think it's the speaker has sort of has sort of the space for the most self empathy in that they connect where they are, and they get to share it in into the, into the room.
Okay. Edwin, you believe that in the case of self empathy, as it relates to empathy circles, to the speaker, in a sense, sets the tone, the speaker has the the most space or the greater capacity to, for self empathy in the circle,
because they get to share, you know, whatever feelings and thoughts or needs or desires, whatever, into the full space, and they get heard by everyone in the, in the room.
Because the speaker is able to share what they're feeling and their thoughts and everything in that moment. And they share that with the rest of the circle, or whoever else is in the room.
Yeah, so now I've got the attention of everyone. It's like, everybody's listening, sensing into it, I get to sort of explore my thoughts, and feelings and you know, kind of get heard to each other and or something, you know, it's something, it's something positive, I think that everyone has that chance, that time to be heard about where they are.
And that's one of the things you you like about the circle process is the speaker gets to share their feelings, and they have everybody's attention in the room. And, you know, and it's a, it can be a really good feeling. And this is something that's really important in the circle. Yeah, I
think it's something that's healthy, that people have a time and space to share who they are, instead of somebody dominating the whole time and kind of being the one that heard and you got to kind of fight for attention. So here, you've got your time and space and you know, attention.
It's a really good thing, you believe it's a really good thing for the speaker, to have that experience of having the attention of the entire circle or the room and feeling being able to know that people are listening to what they have to say, which is very different from for many conversations where, you know, people are talking, speaking or talking at each other, and the person who's speaking is not experiencing
Yeah, so that's like, the the main attention is on me now the speaker, but everyone has health empathy in the moment, like, while you know, we have both you're listening to what's going on for me, but you're also everyone's, I imagine a sensing into their own body, how they are, you know, thoughts are coming up, feelings are coming up. So we're sort of holding, you know, sort of both.
And anything, you believe that, you know, not only does the person who's speaking, experience the self empathy, but also the silent listener, the active listener, that everyone who's helping to hold the space of the circle is, you know, sensing their own feelings and having an awareness of what's happening with their body as the person who's speaking, is sharing.
And another aspect that came up was kind of preparing yourself before you come into the circle. One thing we do, like when we're doing conflict, mediation, is like a facilitator will go is going to be going into, you know, mediate a conflict. But before they do, they have like an empathy Buddy call where they just get heard. So it's like, you know, I can say, Oh, I'm going to do this, this this facilitation. I feel anxious. I feel nervous about it. And you have a space to be heard and see I mean about it before you go into it. And that is very calming and centering and grounding.
Practice.
You also spoke to the idea of preparing beforehand or an empathy circle. And you shared an experience that you've been involved with in that conflict resolution circles. And this idea of having a buddy call for the facilitator prior to the beginning of the circle, so that they have an opportunity to, to share what they're feeling at the moment with someone who's listening. And they can, you know, if they're feeling anxious, or whatever their feeling might be, they can let go of this, before they enter the space to facilitate the conflict resolution circle.
Yeah, it's very grounding. It's like just being herded by someone else's sort of grounds grounds you feel I feel grounded, sort of in my humanity, somehow, there's something kind of solid that I'm not as easily kind of triggered, or, you know, kind of distracted, because I've been heard mine, maybe we all have a need to be heard and seen. And then that need is filled, and I have more resilience for going into difficult situations.
For yourself, having this process of the Buddy Call and sharing what's on your mind and your feelings at the moment, helps you to feel grounded helps you to feel more human. And you think this is also a need that everyone has this Yeah, it can be feel heard, too, which really is feeling heard, meaning feeling more human feeling alive. And this is really important for the process. In terms of preparation for circle,
yeah, it isn't the compassion training, it's, it's the core practice, I just finished this, the core practice is meditation, go off on your own and connect with yourself, which you know, can be helpful. But with the empathy work, it's more like be in relationship with others and connect to yourself by being heard. So those are, you know, they're both valid, but the I think it's what's gets missed, is this being heard by others, and how that really helps you connect with yourself.
It's, you wanted to draw a distinction between compassion training, and the empathy practice. And in that, leading into the compassion training, it's important for the person to go to go off on their own to meditate to to connect with themselves, and to know where they are within themselves with the empathy, pre empathy, training the person
the empathy.
Practice is more about our relationship with ourself and as it relates to other people. And so having this process of being able to share with someone else, what I'm feeling what's on my mind, is is the difference and feeling that connection, not just to myself, but in relationship to other people. How they may be.
Yeah, I feel fully heard. Yep. Thank you going. You want to do any sort of a debrief? Priyanka, like before we have what we have about five, six minutes, or? Yeah, or nine minutes?
Yeah, I'd love to hear from anybody. We can just do pop up style, maybe 30 seconds. Did when you came in, you had certain ideas about self empathy? Did you did that definition expand as a result of participating in this circle? Did you learn anything new, would love to hear that? Just a briefly quick 30 seconds to one minute, and we can just do it popcorn style. I'll start with myself. I learned so much. The first thing was that I never ever thought about preparing for a circle. Preparing to come into a circle by grounding myself. I think that was something that really added to to my understanding of self empathy. And also this difficulty of being with myself and being with others, and how, how difficult that is. Yeah. So Sheila, would you like to continue?
Well, when I started it was kind of in theory or talking about it, but I'm listening, while we were actually talking and I was talking, I, I got the idea of how to more apply the self empathy by expressing my needs, and how how, how this is my, when, when I'm the speaker, I get to actually, you know, the idea of people are listening to me and but then I can stay to attune to the self empathy and, and allow that to I just got a richer feeling of how I could be more self empathic, and state my needs when I'm the speaker. Thank you doing?
Sure. I think one of the things that I enjoy most about this process is there's always an opportunity for me to learn to expand and my knowledge and to grow as a person within this short period of time. For me, the question that comes up when it as it relates to defining self empathy is a really, it's a different question. And it's really, how do we want to define self him? You know, and I think that's really the important thing, because you know, everything is a construct, and we live in a world of constructs. And so I think there's an opportunity to define self empathy in a way that, you know, really is a service to humanity and to, you know, and something that we can work with and build upon. So I think that's the, for me, that's the real question. Understanding, you know, also that the everything that I repeat becomes an affirmation. And so, you know, how do we want what message would we like to share it through the process of defining this word, self empathy. And then the other thing is always the importance of having an awareness of how I use language. And, you know, it ties into self esteem and self empathy in that I view the world based on my own self esteem, how I think, and I speak about the world, so I experienced the world. And so it's really important to have an awareness of how I use language in this process.
Thank you doing Thank you.
Um, yeah, I think this is a really good idea to collect ideas from a good idea to collect ideas from, you know, from other people who are familiar with the end of the circle movement, so that we took this out of the small group that we formed, you know, centered around, I'd won an award and good, great work, but I'm glad that we broadened it out and collected. done this as a piece of research as it were, and collected other opinions. I've been making some notes as I go along. Yeah, a few things that stood out for me were, for example, and add one Edwin's clarification on the difference between self empathy and self compassion. I think I have more clarity on that now. You know, also what Jen was saying about preparing in advance doing a self check before we come in to them with the circuit all to get an act of self empathy. You know, what I was saying, and I think social as well, about being responsible for for us for our feelings and needs, you know, that we have choice and yeah, if we need to listen to our souls and understand ourselves, before we can take responsibility and have that choice. I kind of feeling a bit of responsibility at the moment. Like there's there's a bit of pressure on us to get this right, because they're going to be rolling this out to the empathy circle movements, and I'm glad that we're taking you know, our time at this and reaching out to other people in the movement as well. So I just like to end with that.
Thank you, Colin. Truth.
Yeah, there's so much. I think I just echo what everyone else has said. But also I just feel it's this is really I mean, what Edwin said about it, people getting that attention when they are the speaker that and it's very boundaried, isn't it? It's very like guaranteed, you're guaranteed to get the intention, attention. It's not just like a ebb and flow conversation with friends, which might be more ebb and flow. So that's, yeah, that does build resilience. And I'm sort of thinking about the work that you do Priyanka, with young people, I just think it's really important that, you know, especially if they're, they're not adulting. Yet, it's really this is such a great skill for them to receive and, and practice. Yeah, thank you for letting me
know, Larry. Thank you, Priyanka. And then a little bit of notes there. And this final comment and really enjoy one hearing, the whole circle, it's been wonderful. I wrote down empathy is true freedom of choice, true freedom of choice. And with that comes responsibility. And then it was contrasting false empathy, or what I could refer to as what Greg was talking about, the free the fight or flight, or freeze, which the freezing also includes the fawning syndrome of the amygdala hijack. The fight or flight or freeze is a reflex. It's not a choice. Freedom of choices, empathy, the reflex is not a choice, it's a reflex. And it would lead to what we all know as the Stockholm syndrome, where there becomes a fawning cooperation with a dominator. And that's not freedom. That's not freedom. That's not empathy. So thank you all so much for the circle.
Thank you, Larry. Edwin. Yeah,
I really enjoyed this exploration of the topic of self empathy. I'm really looking forward to next week. Nurik continuing it this time, same time slot, there's a couple of things is one the exploration of what we mean by empathy, how it compares to other practices, NVC focusing self compassion community. And there's a lot of other practices that have sort of a self empathy component and, and then developing some activities to like, what are some activities where we can that we can do to, to practice self empathy. So I'm really excited about this whole project, it's part of it, and I'm gonna put the link in here for anyone that took notes you can go into, it's actually in page two, I've taken some notes too. So you can put any notes that you took, you know, just copy and paste them there. So we have this larger project of defining empathy and then one of the sessions is going to be on self empathy. So really excited to kind of explore that this topics I think it's really important and I think Colin and Priyanka will be the new Kristin Neff sobs Huff emphasis. So yeah, thanks, everyone.
Thank you, everyone. And if you want to discuss more, or share more of your thoughts with set about self empathy with me, I'm happy to listen to you. You can write shoot me an email and we can talk. Thank you so much,
is there a chance to save the transcripts, because there was some good points that a lot of good points in a definitions that were said and I, I didn't take notes because that would distract me. So
we're recording this. And then I put this recording into a program to create automatic transcripts. And so there'll be a page with the recording these notes as well as the transcripts, and I'll send that out and also send out I've created a, you know, for the training, we're creating a seven week training on defining empathy. And I've created the the session one video for that, and I'll send that out to everyone that you can, you can watch it too. And who can come next week just to
check race. Oh, yeah.
I'll be here. All right. I'll be here. Okay. You'll be here. Good. That's okay. Yeah. So I'll send that out. I've got an email here. And just to double check, it's it's your Ruth I think is the only one is a Robins aren't on boon to or is it
oh yeah that's my email
okay great everybody's email so I'll send that out to everyone okay thanks everyone
