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So let's get started. Oh, Becky, what a day.
It's community week and holy smokes, hold onto your butts, because we have one of my absolute favorite humans on the planet. On the podcast today talking about an incredible organization. Let me please introduce you to Crystal Clark with Stop Soldier Suicide. And before I get into the bio, let me take you back to almost two years ago when I get this random DM in my LinkedIn that says, Oh my gosh, I love your podcast so much it is helped our organization, I drop my learnings from you in the team slack. We talk about it in team huddles, and then all of a sudden, I start getting these like requests for friends from Stop Soldier Suicide like it to connect on LinkedIn. And we just formed this friendship and I fall in love with this mighty, mighty organization. But I have to say I love the human more. So let me introduce you to the incredible Crystal Clark, who's the National Senior Director of donor engagement at stopped soldier suicide. She's got over a decade of experience as a fundraiser. And prior to Stop Soldier Suicide, she worked for Upper Chesapeake Medical Centers, where she established their Grateful Patient Program and work with patients who wanted to get back in a meaningful way which resulted Jon in raising over $4.2 million in the six years that she was there.
That's an insane case study
I know. We know we know Grateful Patient and how hard is that is? So that's amazing. Exactly. And so right now she's really in that like donor engagement world where she's overseeing best practices and strategies for revenue growth. And she started there in November 2020. Let's take a hot second and talk about starting a new job in November of 2020. So
We did that, too.
So yeah, we did that too, in August. That's true. And I just absolutely love Crystal your commitment and your passion to saving veterans lives just working on the front lines of this impactful work. And I gotta give a shout out to Crystal's incredible husband, Jared, and her three kids Leila, Braden and Luca. And we just think what you were doing is amazing. So if you're ready to hear about a super progressive nonprofit that is listening to their community, then this is your episode. So Crystal Clark, we are so excited. You're finally on the podcast. Welcome into We Are For Good podcast, my friend.
So, so happy to be here. And you guys are our honorary team members. I mean, truly like you. I think I shared I was the first development professional and having you guys like, you'd be in the podcast and I'm nodding like, yes, we need to do that. Or, or Oh, I'd never thought of that. And a really small story before we kick off. It was episode 127 Becky, and Tanya was a guest that was talking about rebranding your LinkedIn talking about? Yes, the whole time. I'm listening. And Becky, you said something that I was like, you know, I don't know if you remember Arsenio Hall when you're like who doing okay, like I said, Jon, I am gonna throw out all of my suits out of my my closet. And I did. I was seven months in at Stop Soldier Suicide. And I was like, I was kind of almost like rebirthing, myself kind of re imagining who I wanted to be like, the true essence of me. And I looked at my LinkedIn profile, and I am like, oh, my gosh, I have this black blazer on. And this maroon blouse and my smile so serious, and it's so not who I am. So I literally called my family photographer who happens to do brand stuff. And you know, we're a bold blue dress, and I wore my big hoops. I just had to tell you that because it was just kind of this, you know, sometimes you just need someone to give you that permission to break through. And it was like, that was a moment for me. And I just wanted to say thank you.
Oh my gosh.
I just picked out a picture y'all burning your suits together.
It's like that scene and office space where they're like beating the printer. Like that's us with our suits for 100%. And I just think that's a perfect story to show how real and authentic you are and just how I have always felt so connected like you're a lifelong friend that I have known my whole life but we want to go back and know that little person. First, I'd like to take us back to little crystal, tell us about growing up. Tell us what led you to this work?
Absolutely. So just a little bit about myself is my parents were young when they had me and they lived in this community. My mom is one of seven, my dad's one of four, and we're Hispanic family. So family was like, the central location of everything. And they had to make a really difficult choice. They were brave and resilient. And my dad knew he needed a better future for our family and joined the military. So at the very young age, I was this little baby like carting around the country with them. And, you know, he went through deployments. And, you know, soon after, you know, he got out the military after four years, and we found ourselves in another small community in central Pennsylvania. And, you know, I grew up in the 80s and 90s, where, you know, the whole neighborhood was our mamas and daddies. Yeah, tell us who you are, we drink from the hose.
No lead poisoning, we're still here. And
I can still taste that, by the way, when you say that out loud, I choose to
Right? And we found our community again, although our family was in Colorado, we still found this really incredible community that was, you know, lifelines in many ways, you know, I was the, the, you know, community's babysitter, and, you know, just really kind of built that culture. And as a high school student, again, you know, wanting to get involved, I got involved in Student Council and did all the dances and, you know, had so much fun doing that was the captain of our field hockey team. So always had that innate ability to want to, you know, inspire and be involved in it, carried through through college, you know, play field hockey, and went to school to be a teacher. And we were division two national champions for my field hockey team. And one of the things that I reflect back on that time is we had this sports psychologist that came into our field hockey team, before that year that we won the national championship and really did some deep digging with us and recognize we were all individuals. But collectively, we were one, we were a team. And, you know, some of my teammates were like, Oh, the school, the sports psychologist is coming, I'm like, Yes, I love this stuff. It was just, you know, always part of me. And we had this really awesome tradition that we did, where we just all linked arms together. And, you know, when we, before the beginning of the game, we all, you know, set the link at the, you know, each individually. And then at the end, you know, someone said, 123, and it was chain, we were all one. And, you know, for me, that grounding and community has always been something that's been a big value for me. And you know, and I still my college roommates, I mean, we're both still super close, and make intentionality to, you know, make time to see each other. But although we're busy moms, and same with my high school, besties, there's seven of us, and we're all across the country. And, you know, we make sure that we take that time to be deep rooted in each other's lives in in this crazy world. And, you know, then I, I started my teaching career, I was at that phase of my life where I was like, I can conquer anything, I'm gonna save this world. And Jared, and I moved to Maryland, and again, a new community for us, we didn't know anybody. And we both taught at the same school. And we got really lucky, we entered this amazing culture of a school and just to kind of paint the picture of that school is we were, we were one of the only schools in the county that wasn't thriving because of the state standardized testing. A lot of our kids, although I was a fifth grade teacher, I may have been, you know, their fifth sixth school that they had had and had a lot of gaps in their learning. But we had this incredible leader. Again, she was a veteran. And she created this culture of we are going to do good for these kids, essentially. And, you know, we we all embrace it. We even called it our Maggie family. You know, we're all teachers, but we're all doing this together. And it was just really important to me. And something I always like to share to kind of, you know, show a little bit about myself is I also did some intentional things to build community in my classroom and outside of my classroom. The first week of every school year, I knew how important it wasn't just about the kids but it was Bridging the Relationship home with the with the parents. And what I did is I literally picked up the phone. I called every single parent and I introduced myself, I told them how excited I was for the school year? And I didn't just say your kids awesome. Are your kids amazing, you know, really generic, I was really intentional about saying something specific. So that parent knew on the other end, that I, I knew their kids. So, you know, I would say, you know, your daughter writes these beautiful love poems, and she's so excited to share them with you when she gets home. And the mom would be like, Oh, my gosh, she does, like, I love it. So I built that bridge. And really, in that community, it was something you know, that a lot of people were afraid of, because maybe the parents couldn't come during the day to help volunteer, but they were working two jobs to make ends meet. So I understood that and really wanted to break those barriers. And I think it really helped the culture in my classroom, because the students knew I wasn't a phone call from Mrs. Clark didn't necessarily mean, oh, it meant, you know, like, maybe something was off, and I just wanted to make sure everything was okay. And, you know, building that relationship. So that was something that, you know, I think was a differentiator during that time, and, you know, kind of pulled that through, became a mom. And it was the most amazing, exhausting, amazing, exhausting time in my life. And I was, I stayed home and I was kind of lonely, to be really honest. You know, my, my friends in my community, were my teacher friends, and I wasn't teaching any longer. And, you know, I kind of lost myself for a little bit. And I was like, No, I'm not going to stay in this place. So I started getting involved in my community. I joined a moms group. And surprise, surprise, I was quickly the events coordinator. And then I became the president of the moms group. And I had the moms group wasn't just about playdates and moms night outs, we also did fundraisers. And I had this really, we did this really tiny fundraiser. And at the time, our local hospital was raising money for our cancer center that was being built. And I made a phone call to the Foundation office and let them know. And I needed some logos and was talking to their foundation office, and I had coffee with one of the people who work there. And we were talking. And she's now my dear friend and mentor. And when we were talking, she was talking about just how important this this cancer center was to our community to provide care. And it was I left that meeting and I drove home. And I told Jared, I was like, I want to be that when I grow up. And he, he, he literally, for me, he laughed at me because I may have had five or six other ideas before I had met. My dear friend, and but he just was and I was kept on talking about it. And I just think it was like a sticky point for me, because I wasn't sure what I wanted to do next. So I had this great opportunity to work at the Crohn's and Colitis foundation where I was the development coordinator. So I were about 10 hats, anywhere from processing checks to fixing the Pitney Bowes machine
Oh my gosh.
And but then my favorite thing was our Crohn's mamas who, you know, their children were suffering silently. You don't see it externally. And you know, how brave they were sharing their story time and time again, to help us to raise funds. And the other part of me is there was this in between time where, what our executive director at the time had an opportunity for growth, and we didn't have an executive director. So I sat in as the, you know, gala person that was helping to run it. And I had this chance to work with this incredible board member and volunteer leader, and it was so thrilling and exciting, because he was exactly what you wanted from a volunteer, he picked up the phone, he would be like, okay, just drop my name here and get you know, it was just like, it was just so exhilarating that I was like, I love this. And, you know, just had our most successful gala at that time. And it was just an incredible opportunity. But then growth came knocking. And that growth was at Upper Chesapeake where I had to raise that those small funds like maybe three $400 for the cancer center, and had the opportunity to build their grateful patient program. And I tell you, one of my favorite things and you know, honestly, the things that I hold close to my heart there was about relationships. I had to build relationships with the physicians and clinicians to try For me, that's not easy for them to trust to, you know, share their their patients and you know, do the whole grateful patient thing, but I built that trust with them. And then from there, I had the opportunity to hear 1000s of community members who had transformational experiences that our healthcare system and then wanted to do something transformational back whether it was because they utilized our, you know, Heart and Vascular Institute or Cancer Center, the families who used our Hospice House and wanting to give back whether that was $25 Doctors Day gift that that was what was meaning for them, or, you know, seven figure gifts that they had this incredible experience. And they wanted to give back in a majorly impactful way. And it was just this really awesome time, and then knock knock growth again for Stop Soldier Suicide. And that's what I'm going to share about today.
Crystal Clark, is anybody out there listening, wondering why you are part of community week on the We Are For Good pocast.
I mean, literally, I'm like two things, Crystal cares. And Crystal gets community like you are in the perfect position you were made for donor engagement, so amazing.
Like, I mean, it's a beautiful thread of your life. It exudes the way that you show up, and we've been the recipients to get to be in that community with you. So thank you, for all that context. There's a lot of things honestly, that we would love to circle back to. But we want to keep talking about, you know, your work today with Stop Soldier Suicide. We love this mission, I hear that your father was a veteran. So thank you, too, for that sacrifice for your whole family, and investment. So I'd love for you to kind of talk about that transition. I mean, jumping from health care, to veterans care, it's got to be a transition also. So talk us talk to us about the mission and what really sets it apart from others working in the same kind of sector.
Absolutely. So our mission, the first thing I'm going to share is a statistic that I wasn't aware of until I started working at stop soldier suicide, veterans are 57% more likely to die by suicide than their peers who did not serve. And I tell you, like I didn't know until I started working here. And to be honest, you know, that's really the essence of why Stop Soldier Suicide came together in 2010. Our founders are three Army veterans who were they, they met at Johns Hopkins and an ROTC and then they went and deployed and, you know, served in Afghanistan mission work in Haiti, like they all did their own thing in the army and didn't lose any of their battle buddies to combat. They came home from deployments. And slowly, one by one, each of them were losing their soldiers to suicide. And they weren't okay with it, they were like, we have to do something about it. So the three of them came together. And literally, like they were building their careers post, you know, being in the Army, and running a nonprofit. And they were literally at the beginning, like literally the triage, answering the phones, figuring out how they can get them help. And we know that's not scalable. So the next phase was having volunteers help to do that. And then the next phase was having social workers do it. And then four and a half years ago, they kind of did a reboot with new leadership and new thought leaders and decided to say like, how can we do this scalable and also measure because we know when we outsource things, we can't really measure what's the next trickle effect. So we knew we needed to bring this program in house. So basically, what we did is we had all the who's who in suicidality, come together and form a scientific advisory committee. And they then we're able to give us the guidance to understand like, what is the model look like for veterans specific? And how can we make sure that when we are caring for our veterans that we're doing it at the most optimal, optimal way that we can? And how can we measure that what we're doing is effective. So we really took an incredible program model and started to bring it in house and we all of our clinical team are all Stop Soldier Suicide employees, we don't outsource anything. There are some things and I'll get to that a little bit later to explain that but you know, we are in this suicide space and we're super proud and we're effective. We're saving lives every single day.
This is such an important conversation because the soldiers suicide issue is an epidemic. And I think about how often this has come up even on our podcast this came up with Damien Mandor with the International anti poaching foundation, you know, as someone looking for meaning this has come up At the Bob Woodruff Foundation, we will link to those conversations as well. And in the thing that I've so much value about what you're doing Crystal is one, you look hard at the data, you don't just guess, you don't just wonder or you don't think that you just know you actually dig into the data. And we're gonna dive into that further in this conversation. But the other thing is, you see, the one person at the end is a human being. And if I'm going to get real personal Crystal and I have talked about a dear friend of mine, that I'd like to dedicate this episode to Matthew, who suffered and passed away after having PTSD coming home from war. And we grew up in youth group and went to the same high school. And it's people that we know, and I, and I, thank you so much for being so progressive, and the way that we look at these issues, and I and I want to go a little deeper. And so could you talk to us about some of the major challenges that our military personnel and our veterans are facing right now? I mean, how is their mental health? And how are you addressing these challenges? Because I know you have several programs across your organization to fight all this?
Absolutely. So I think, first and foremost, I think one of the things that separates us is, we know that veterans aren't going to raise their hands and say I need help, they have been trained to be in really difficult situations, and to be able to manage, you know, the stress and complexities that those are. So actually raising your hand to say I need help is not easy. So one thing that we do is, we 70% of our clients come in through strategic digital marketing tactics that we use. And I'll just kind of give you a quick tone about those. So 18 to 34 year olds is the rise of veteran suicide. So there, it's getting younger. And it's it's heartbreaking. And we know that a lot of that age bracket is spending times in video games like discord and tilta, phi and all of those spaces. So we are actually putting strategic ads in those spaces. That's not saying, you know, Are you suicidal, but really, you know, gently getting them immersed into who we are, so they can come into our care. So we're very progressive, and making sure that we're allowing them, we're finding them in their spaces that they are, and we're allowing them to come into our care, because we know otherwise, raising your hand is not easy. So I think that's such a differentiator in this space. And progressive, you know, we're we're thinking ahead in that space, for sure.
Marketing is mission. I mean, like the most efficient direct example of marketing is mission of like, how can it help us accomplish what we're really trying to do out in the marketplace? So I mean, I want to keep on this thread of innovation and testing. I mean, y'all are doing this really progressive, what I call like a rebrand or renaming of this campaign called Roger, walk us through this whole piece, what was the impetus to really rethink the way your org was being viewed. And it's almost like a lifestyle brand now. So like, unpack this, because I'm so intrigued as you're a resident branding nerd over here.
It's called Roger, can we talk about that? Like Roger, Roger, it is so brilliant.
Yes. Like, I received your message is what it's saying. That is what it's saying. And I'm so darn proud, like I there's to kind of unpack it a little bit. We knew that our branding, Stop Soldier Suicide, it is clear, it is very well known what we do. But we had some limitations with it. The word soldier, if you are a Marine, no, no, you don't call them a soldier. Right? So but we do care for every single branch. So we wanted to make sure that that was understood, even though we had the flip. You know, but it just it still didn't resonate, because its soldiers in the name and also the word suicide. Oftentimes, people may not recognize that they're in that state, they might not feel normal are feeling good, but they are, you know, they still aren't ready to say, I have thoughts of suicide. So we knew there were some limitations with that as well. And the other thing is we heard from our clients, our clients were getting our, you know, phone calls or emails from our team members that were reaching out to them. And they were seeing Stop Soldier Suicide, but they weren't ready to tell their loved one jet that they were getting care from us. So we recognize that we had to look back and say, how do we need to articulate our wellness coordination? So we did some testing. We had three brand names that we put out into a group of veterans that are in our challenge space and started to test Three different names. And in that test, Roger was by far the out that the outlier and the winner of it, and we then were like, Okay, this is this makes sense. But how do we go to market with this? How do we, how do we go to that next phase? So instead of just blank slate, we're just naming our wellness program, Roger, we actually did a small test in the state of actually New York and started to test to see how well it was going to be received Are we still going to get clients are we still going to be able to reach high risk, because that's what we want to be able to get people who are in a high acute state of suicidality or chronic state of suicidality, so we can save their lives. So were we getting the right type of clients and that small test, boom, data showed that yes, we were and, and then also, the also great thing is what we wanted to do is we got more than just you know, arm, it was more diverse in the type of people that we were getting in the different branches. So it was really kind of a whole, whole round, you know, group of people that we were we weren't hitting before, and it was just awesome, and then took time to roll it out. And as of October 11, our wellness program is now rebranded as Roger and like you said, lifestyle warm, talking about, you know, just come into our care. So it had a lot of a lot. It's awesome.
It's beyond awesome. Like when you first told me about it a couple months ago, I was just like, this is the way this is the way nonprofits like if could you reimagine that your organization could become a lifestyle brand, because when we talk about core value, number three, simplify humanize and tell a good story. You humanized, this beneficiary, you humanized these men and women and I, I just think that the brilliance of this is I mean, that's a long game play, but you're gonna see it for years and years to come. I'm just so proud of you, I can't wait to watch the evolution of what happens. I can't wait for people to see each other on the streets and being like Roger, Roger, you know, like, I just I feel it. And I can just see them wearing the shirts and knowing that they have someone who has their back. And so I want to kind of stay on this testing piece, because you said something to me, and I loved it so much. I wrote it down and you said, here's the thing, Becky, we're not afraid over here. We're not afraid to test. We're not afraid to innovate. And we dive hard into the data. And what you said to me really struck me because you said it changed the way you understand and connect with people who have suicidal ideation. And you got together and you've got this incredible grant and founded this blackbox project. And I want you to tell the community about it. And what the data told you and how it made you adjust your approach because it's freaking brilliant.
Yeah, again, I cannot take any credit. I mean,
Way to go team. Crystal and team. Yes, everybody behind you.
The team work with incredibly smart humans, and they blow me away every single day. They're just, there's so smart and innovative. And I want you both to think about the black box in an airplane. Yeah, previous to them being in there. We didn't know causes of crashes. You know, we, most of the time, there were no survivors. And there may have been people who are standing by that had seen it, but they didn't know the cause of the crash, then we have the black boxes in there. And we were able to understand what was happening. So take that concept. And I'll unpack it for who we are and how we're using the black box project at Stop Soldier Suicide. So first of all, we have these incredible loss survivor families that want to make a difference. And they literally lend us their loved ones devices. So they are giving us their loved ones devices. So they have died by suicide, and they are veterans, and they are lending us their devices. We take those devices. we extrapolate the data. And we basically do a data autopsy on their phone and think of it we're looking at risk stratification starting at a year, months, days, hours and minutes, leading to death by suicide, so we can understand what is happening in that timeframe. And so far, now we're just in test data, so nothing publishable or things of that nature. It's in that test data phase. But there's some things that we're seeing already. The set in terms of anger, we're seeing sleeplessness patterns, the pattern of sleep is changing dramatically leading up to death. And the third thing is self isolation. So Jon, if you and I are in a cadence of like texting every two days, and all the sudden it starts, that gap starts to separate, we're seeing that happening. And then the other thing that we're starting to see is, there's studies out there that most people don't leave suicide notes behind, we're actually seeing where people are writing a note in their notes section, and then deleting it. So we're actually able to say that that that is not actually true. It's incredible. And the other thing I'm most proud of is that we're not just getting the data, were you going to use that data for good, we are relent, we're on this relentless pursuit of innovation to reduce veteran suicide. So we are using that data to then inform our model like how can we sharpen it, make it better, do do more things? And then on the other side, I already talked about, like how we, you know, find the people who don't want to be found use that data to also, you know, target where they're spending their time?
Holy heck, I mean,
Right.
Yeah. What a brilliant approach, and just the way that y'all are approaching it, that you don't have the answer. You know, that's exactly what Seth Godin led off the season with you, you're acting as if you don't know the answer. So you're innovating, you're trying stuff, and you're gonna figure out a way and it's already leading to new paths. So, goodness, y'all are just incredible. Just gotta say, and I mean, I was, I was thinking, as you were kind of talking about your winding journey to get here, just how perfect you are as a donor relations, engagement person, I mean, you're a people, person by nature, but just how you centered everything and seeing the human from so early on, in your career to in your life. So I just want to hear a little bit about that experience. I mean, you get to lead the donor engagement team, what's your role in fostering relationships with donors? And How crucial is it to really bring them into this mission?
It's, it's critical, you know, we're on the cutting edge stuff. And, you know, I think to start, I literally, before I started, nobody was picking up the phone and getting to know our donors. So I kind of went back to my teaching days, and I literally picked up the phone and started making phone calls. Why are people giving to us? What's the value of them supporting us? And what are we doing? What could we be doing better to serve them as our believers and supporters? So you know, I picked up the phone, I heard a lot of why's, I heard a lot of people saying, you haven't been talking to me, why aren't you talking to me, I actually had one of my, my donors who he was 80 years old. And he only takes phone calls, no zoom meetings, no, go to visit him meetings. And he was giving about, he was giving a five figure gift at the time. And he's like, nobody ever has called me. No one's ever asked me, you know, why I give or what I do. And time left in the next year, he became a six figure gift. So really developing those rapport and relationships was essential. And through that, too, we also developed an executive leadership council where we found those people who are raising their hand and wanting to be connectors and helping us to raise money. So really, I mean, to be honest, it's it's about building those relationships. And my favorite question to ask supporters, especially those who are, like, jazzed and pumped up about us is, who else do you know? Like, if it's important to them, they know people so who else do you know that needs to know about our mission? So that has been springboards into other relationships that have grown our mission and it's essential our donors deserve to hear what what they're making an impact especially the cool stuff that we're doing? So you know, that's been my my role here at Stop Soldier Suicide.
You know, what it relates to me and I'm going to thread this from something you said before, back when you were calling those parents and talking to their, to their children, and humanizing. And you told me one of the first times we talked that you picked up the phone and called everybody who gave $250 just to hear their story. And I think when you just call or you just reach out and connect, and it doesn't mean you're not taking the query and sorting it ascending to descending. You know, when you get in the middle of it when you see the to your, what you just said believers, something magical unfolds in y'all. That is how movements are created. Because what you said is true crystal, the ripple they care so much and the ripple that they can cascade by using their passion and furthering it in a way that hits their network and their friends is networks. It has a compounding effect. And all of a sudden, the phone call to the $250 donor doesn't just yield the $250. It's yielding so much for your organization that cannot be quantified in that database. I'm so stinking proud of you. I'm just so proud of this nonprofit. I'm, I'm proud for your moxie. I'm proud for your relentlessness. And at the core of it, I just feel so much love for these human beings that are seemingly alone. They think they're alone. And the fact that you go into these spaces and find them. And so gently find a way for them to connect is just beautiful. And so we want to hold some space on the podcast to give you a CTA. Like normally we say everybody don't forget the CTA on the end of all of your communication. But for the first time today, like we want to hear your CTA is there a specific message call to action that our community can embrace? Around what Stop Soldier Suicide's mission is our how we can be helpful to your community?
Absolutely. I mean, first and foremost, go to our site, you know, there's so much to learn. And I mean, as Becky and Jon had said, there's so much data that we've collected around what we're doing. So you can go deep into it and, and learn and be curious. But I am a fundraiser. So I have to do the right CTA. And what I'm going to say to you is this holiday season, there is a lot of empty chairs around tables from people who have lost their loved ones to suicide. But there's also a lot of seats at the table that are filled, because lives are being saved by the work that we're doing at Stop Soldier Suicide. So I know you have so many options to give. And I encourage you to get involved you can be you know, a Facebook fundraiser, if you're on an ERG that is veteran associated and you want to get involved with us, you could do that. If you want to make an impactful gift, call me I'm your girl, I will answer the phone and, and talk you through it. And we also have our monthly giving program that is our battalion and you know, if you want to be able to give all year round, please do so. So that seat at the table is there next year.
And Crystal means that I mean, we always say these things, but she's really likely does whatever gift matters, whatever you can do. So I love that so much. You know, we celebrate philanthropy, we love going back into the stories that shaped us. And I wonder what's a moment of philanthropy, you would take us back to you as you kind of reflect on your life and career.
Absolutely. Mine is 10 year old Crystal. My dad was involved in our local JCs. And this is before, you know, now we take the angel off the tree and you get the stuff and then you give it we don't really know who who is and I respect that. But this is back in the day where we actually got to spend time with the people that we were giving to we ate breakfast with these two boys. My dad brought me along and we had this breakfast. And then my dad drove, I think these things through and I'm like, oh my goodness times are so different. But he drove these two boys. And we were in a strip mall. And we're at a value city. So it was like a discounted store and my dad got the list of everything that was on their list, the jeans, the shirt, you know, the essentials essentially. And my dad, a veteran, hispanic man, super strict, but he had this little jovial side of him at times and he got this little he got this wry smile. And he's like, Alright, boys are walking to the end of the other end of the strip mall. And at the other end of the strip mall was a toy store. So we're walking, we go to the toy store. And that's when Ninja Turtles are really cool. And now they're back around again.
I know 2.0.
It's like, it's so interesting. We should have kept those things I don't know. But he let them each pick a Ninja Turtle and these boys eyes like I can see them still today. And the joy that they had in their eyes. But then I looked at my dad and mind you we were probably living paycheck to paycheck at that time to be very honest. So this was a stretch gift. And the joy that he had. I tell you is like the best. I mean, it's just in now getting to do what I do. It's almost like it's been full circle.
What's your dad's name?
Marty.
Marty, you've passed along a heck of a legacy here to your girl. And what a story I just formative experiences matter, they shape us, they tell us what is true in our heart, what jives with our values and just bravo to all the parents out there who are modeling, generosity, kindness, service, these things truly matter. Crystal, you've listened to enough podcast episodes, you know, what's next? One good thing is here, and I would love to know, what is your one good thing you're gonna leave with the audience.
All right, I couldn't decide. So I'm gonna give two. So I hope I don't get in trouble.
Okay, then we've had three before. It's your show at this point, do whatever you want.
One is Be present. We are in this like crazy, fast paced world, especially now it's end of year I get it. We're all busy. But and I'm probably like, behind 20 slacks and five texts. But I'm here with you. And I say that, like, you know, if you're on your one on one with your with your direct reports, or, you know, your meeting with a donor sitting on the sideline of your kids basketball game, you know, all those things, try to be as present as you possibly can. Because that's where connection happens. And that's where you you know, feel the other person that you're spending your time with. So present is number one. And the second one is, we just got together our team's growing. And yay, is right. I'm feeling like, whoo, I can get rid of that brain and that brain.
I know it. I want to say hi to all of them. Hi, Morgan. Hi, Claire. Hi, Ashley. Hi, Tina. Hi, everybody.
Yeah, and we got together. And we always do this exercise as leaders like start, stop, continue. And it's, you know, it's always interesting to kind of hear what everybody has to say. And I said, we need to start to stop, pause and reflect, we are always in that forward motion where we're like, I'm going to be happy when this happens. I'm going to feel successful when this happens. But we got to stop and pause and look behind us and be like, we did some pretty awesome stuff. And really, at the core of who I am, I instill these in my lives in three different ways. One is, I am a gratitude journal junkie, I literally I do my gratitude journal, I give them as gifts, I, you know, it's just something that's a practice. So I can remind myself of like, these things are happening in my life in real time. The second one is at our family dinner table. So if you ever come to my, my family dinner table, we always start with what's our favorite part of the day. And we take that moment to pause and share that with each other. So even when Leila is besties are over, they know the drill, they're, they're prepared to share their favorite part of the day. And then the third thing is to start my team meetings, I actually did a little you know, spin off of your one good thing and we share our one good thing that happened to set the tone for our week. And everybody comes together and it's not where always have to be work related. And I just feel like it gets us grounded to start like, you know, all the things that we have to do it grounds us of like, you know, I had this great weekend with my you know, Claire just actually just said this with my college besties from Appalachian State and we we hiked and we ate and we spent time together and jet this great, you know, weekend or if it's I finally got that donor meeting that I've been trying to get and it's like yes, but it sets the tone for the rest of the stuff that we have to talk there. So I just encourage everyone to you know, take that moment and pause and reflect, celebrate whatever that looks like.
This is gonna get annoying for people who are listening to community really say the same thing. I really like Crystal Clark, just because of like all of the things that we've known a view and how you've supported this the podcast and the community since the really early days. But I really like you after this conversation like just your heart for this space, the way you show up the way you see people. This is what we are fighting for like you were the person the very person we wanted to have this connect with. And so it's just an honor that you're part of this community if you're listening that's your call to action from us is like you have community like Crystal here with open hands ready to lock arms with you and to be a support and a friend to you in this journey. So I want to give you an opportunity just to share how can people find you how can they connect with Stop Soldier Suicide? See the good work y'all are doing? What are all the ways you show up and connect with people online?
Absolutely. First, you can go to stopsoldiersuicide.org to see our site and all the great work that we're doing. Personally. You can reach me at my email and feel free to email me at Crystal. Clark@stopsoldiersuicide.org And I'm active on LinkedIn as well so you can connect with me there and eager to meet you all and connect.
I am so glad that the world connected us, Crystal Clark, I am so grateful that you listened to your nudge and found your way into the nonprofit space. And thank you for what you're doing to be a light to so many veterans and just honestly, a light to us. You're such an inspiration. Keep going.
Thank you so wonderful to spend time with you both today. Thank you.
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