Hey there. Welcome. It's been a couple of weeks since a new episode has dropped. Thank you for being patient with me. This is episode 50. So I'm really, really excited to be here with you. And if you're new to this space, welcome, if you are a regular Welcome back, how are you experiencing life these days? Lately, for me, life feels very full of opposites, often at the same time. And the most glaring one right now is that spring is here, right where the first week of April. And I am not feeling so springy. Like totally flat, complete lack of bounce, and spring. As I'm like the verb that is the real real, I'm not even going to sugarcoat it. I don't even have the energy to sugarcoat. I'm wondering if maybe there's any chance that you also can identify with this in some way. I know some people in my inner circle are feeling this way. I'm not sure about those of you who are connecting with this podcast. But if you are, I am hoping that if you need some solidarity, or anything else, validation that perhaps you find that here. Of course, I'm always hoping I'm not an island all by myself. But I wouldn't mind if I'm on an island by myself in this one, because it's tough. It's tough when, you know, nature's feeling light and brighter, and you're not what's heavy and present for me are some pretty heavy hitters. Honestly, it's grief, it's overwhelm stress, fatigue, disconnect, worried out fear, perhaps the list could go on. But those are the main main ones. And when it comes to grief, I have to say that it's that closely coupled with shock, really, because in case you haven't been around the show, at all, or for a while, we lost my dad unexpectedly, almost five months ago now. And I still cannot wrap my mind around it. And that's hard. And, you know, that definitely leads or feeds into the overwhelm, because life still goes on, no matter what it is that you are going through, you know, your responsibilities, my kids activities, despite my life feeling very upside down right now. Life still goes on. And that can be sometimes a little bit of a bomb, something to kind of just change things up, but also can feel like a lot, a lot. And then you know, there's stress, there's always stress. For me, being a solo business owner is super stressful. It's super gratifying, of course, but super stressful, because it requires continued effort. You know, when you're working on a team or for a company, you've often got other people, other teammates. Other people, you know, that can put in some time. And when you're a solopreneur, it's you. And so you have to keep going networking, building relationships, creating connections, you know, all in the name of eventually creating new opportunities for yourself. And that's all amongst all the other things that I shared, and also living within our current systems and the dumpster fire that's this world with all that is going on. Even if I am not directly impacted, you know, by the atrocities that are going on still is hard to be in this world right now. And that leads to fatigue, right? It's all exhausting, caring, sadness, and overwhelm, and stress is so tiring. Also, a big thing I am. I don't I don't wanna say coming to terms with but something that I'm navigating, I guess is that I feel like I didn't get the rest I needed in the winter. The last few years I've been really leaning into winters vibe of dormancy and slowing down. And I didn't get that because my dad passed away at the very beginning of November and so all of November even into December was just this wild whirlwind. And, you know, the end of the year can be quite busy anyways. So, I feel like you know, especially with carrying all of this shock and grief and overwhelm, I just didn't get that rest that I would have normally got in. And also, I was sick for most of January, this winter was really brutal for a lot of people that I know, in terms of sickness, and, you know, so fatigued from that, but then also fatigue from continuing to deal with one thing after another, whether that is in your personal life or in our communities at large, that fatigue is real, which then leads me to the disconnect feeling, sometimes I feel disconnected from myself, because I have to push aside or put aside my feelings in order to get some things done, because the reality is I have to work or to be present with my kids and my husband, sometimes I feel disconnected from my community, because I'm intentionally spending more time by myself. And sometimes, you know, I have to uphold that boundary for myself, for protection and safety, in terms of when I feel overwhelmed, and when I need to recharge and reset, but also, I think, you know, I feel overwhelmed sometimes being out in the world, carrying all of this sadness. And so I intentionally disconnect from my community, which isn't always a good thing, sometimes it is necessary. But sometimes it's, it's, you know, I find myself saying, Gosh, you know, I really am spending a lot of time in seclusion, should I be reaching out a little bit more, you know, and then also, there is a real disconnect, between me and the universe. Me and even God, you know, I was raised Catholic, but so I, you know, I have a deep belief in God and Jesus, but of course, I, you know, the last few years, I really disconnected from the church, because I don't share many of the values and the morals and the teachings of the Church. But I still do have a deep belief in God and Jesus, that also feels complicated, but, you know, it's hard for me, losing my dad. And, you know, when people would say, oh, everything for a reason, or it's God's plan, and I just don't agree with that. And so I do feel disconnected from spirit from, you know, the beings in the ether. It's really hard for me to be in that right now. But it is real. And, you know, I, my anger with losing my dad is real. And so that's also playing a big part into this disconnect. There's also worry, doubt and fear, among about so many things that I'm sure many of you can relate to about my business and making money about showing up for myself in the ways that I need, you know, being able to support my kids and my husband the way they need to, you know, to make money, be able to pay their bills, you know, these are all normal things that I'm feeling. But you know, what, it's a lot to be dealing with all at once. And I share all of this with you not to make these conversations just about me, or to play the hardship Olympics, but really, honestly, so that we can have true connections, deep connections, authentic connections in all of this, because, you know, going through any one of those emotions or times in life can feel really hard and really lonely. There might be some shame or guilt or judgment involved. And that height ends when you're coupling some of these hard feelings together or hard experiences. And when many of them come together can really feel like a mountain. So if you too, are going through a tough time or carrying some heavy stuff. If you're feeling like life right now doesn't align with what is happening out in nature in spring time. I want you to know you're not alone. If you're feeling put off or annoyed or angry or even offended. By spring doing its thing. I get it. You know, historically, I've always loved the start of spring. I love the increased sunlight. I love how the sun feels warmer on my skin. I love the warmer days. The blooms, the birds, the animals. I love Spring, except for the allergies. I live in New Jersey, the allergies are just atrocious. And I can't stand it.
end And I bet it's not going to come to as a surprise to you that in recent years I have really become weary of my tendency and others tendency to turn pace to like a really good clip of, you know, actions, whether, you know, I or anybody else, we're observing slowness in the winter or not, right, but turning up the speed and doing all the things and really speeding right into summer. That, for me has become a real big sticking point in the last few years. Many previous versions of staff, alongside lots of people out in society, have been going at a pretty good clip since January 1, with their New Year's resolutions with wanting to hit the ground running on, you know, taking the year by the horns and making the most out of it. And, you know, often turning up the speed even more, as we get into spring, once the veil and darkness of winter lifts. From the Googler spring has two definitions as a verb to move or jump suddenly, or rapidly upward or forward. And the second one is to originate or arise from. And if you have lived in were raised in have been around American culture long enough, I'm sure you already know, American culture freaking loves a reason to go fast. It is like a cultural practice to literally spring ourselves into spring. And I'm weary of all of this. I've become weary of all of this in the last few years, because this is really fueling burnout, end of the year burnout specifically, but honestly, given the state of the world and the state of things going on in our country, here in the United States, and within our communities, our broader communities and our smaller communities. It is so much that we are carrying so much that we are enduring. And so yes, the end of the year, burnout is a real thing. And it continues to be a real thing. And what's really hard now is that there is like an all year round of burnout. That also collides at the end of the year with end of the year burnout. It is a whole other animal. Right society and systems really are to blame. We are not to blame. But friends, I will say this, we are complicit in fueling the burnout. When we don't slow down enough. I've been talking about that all winter, when we don't rest enough. And when we try to maintain a high speed for so many of the 52 weeks of the year. Remember life during summer and fall are so fast paced, we don't need to be speeding up from now. Just because we have increased sunlight just because we have warmer temperatures doesn't mean we have to utilize all that energy and and fill all the time. Some of the time can be blank. We can still you know cruise control or you know cruise along kind of like at a Sunday leisurely pace. We can do that still. You might be like you know what stuff? I agree with you I have zero interest is zero energy doing any springing any jumping or bouncing forward. I've honestly I really am feeling like that. And I'm wondering how about we let that be okay. I'm thinking maybe we align ourselves with that second definition of spring, which was to originate or to arise from, because to me, that feels a bit slower and less intense. And to me, most importantly, I feel like that aligns more with the characteristics of spring, which are softness, some waster warmth, a slow ish pace, new beginnings, birth, renewal and growth, you people you might know, are beginning to tend the soil of their gardens, whether that is to plant flowers, or to plant vegetables. And this really is the time for us to tend the soil of our lives to we let our hopefully, in some capacity, let the soil of our lives be dormant in the winter time. Maybe we did some planning some dreaming some imagining right, during that restful and dormancy period. And then remember that summer is when we start to bear the fruit of our labor of you know, the previous six, seven months. And also that's when we start to really see the fruit of you know what we've planted come up the blooms and the vegetables and the fruits, whatever it is that we happen to be planting. Our lives really do mimic nature and so we can't rush the process now. What if you treated your life the same way you are treating those seeds you're planting? Because if we You rush through the process. Now in our lives, we'll be rushing through some integral parts of the growing process of the cultivating process. And we'll spin our wheels eventually so much, we'll be running on fumes by October. And I'm tired of that cycle. So I'm curious, what do you want to plant from seeds from now? And if you find yourself feeling similarly to me, I'm not quite into spring right now. Here's my advice to you. Let that be okay. Remember, not all seeds, or crops out in nature, make it on time or at all? Why wouldn't it be the same for our experiences and our output? I know society tells us something else. I know, society tells us that we need to be already at this point, you know, full three months, you know, pounding the pavement, speeding ahead to our goals. But we also know that that is unsustainable. So we might have to continue doing and you may say to yourself, well, yes, stuff. I know, that makes sense. But I still struggle sometimes with letting it be okay. I get it. Same thing for me, you can bet. Anytime I'm up here in this podcast talking about something. I'm in the same boat. Right, we may be in different boats, different places on our journey. But I often need these reminders to which I'm like, Well, if I need a reminder, somebody else out there needs a reminder too. So here are some ways to support you in letting yourself be a little or a lot flat and being okay with it. Continue to rest, there is going to be no part of the year ever, where I'm going to say Yeah, it's fine. Don't rest, no worries, sleep is enough. Still rest as much as you need to. And remember that there are at least seven ways to rest we don't win when I say as much as you need to. I don't mean for the amount of minutes that you spend at one time. I mean, like if you need to take frequent pauses to rest. In short battles do that. If you need to take a long ass bout of rest, do that, obviously, with how your responsibilities and your life allows. And that may be different day to day, or week to week, but still continue to rest. And I will still ask you to rest in the summertime and I will still ask you to rest in the fall. And I'm still going to ask him to rest in the winter in the upcoming months. Still, it this will always be part of our conversation. So remember, when it comes to seven types of RAS, we are talking about physical, mental, sensory, creative, emotional, social, and spiritual. And since we've been talking about this idea, since last year, sometime at least, I think we've been talking about this for at least a year. Remember that this is a conversation that you can have with yourself ongoing. I like to encourage my clients and myself to consider each season. What do these types of rest mean to me? What do these types of, of rest mean to me in this season, how I'm experiencing life and what's going on, because your physical rest in the spring may look very different from summer, which may look very different from Fall, which may look very different from winter, etc. So consider practices for each of these types of rests, specifically for spring. And, specifically, of course, how you're experiencing spring right now. So how you might rest in these ways when you're feeling kind of flat may be different from when you are feeling a little bit more uplifted. And that's cool to have some options. The second thing I'm going to ask you to do is to be gentle with yourself. Just like all those parents of those little baby animals that we're seeing out there in the world are very tenderly caring for their babies, do the same thing. Continue to move slowly ish. Pepper in some uplifting things or things that require more energy or for you to move a little bit more quickly. Remember, your betta says like increases like and opposites balance. So if you're feeling flat, you know, kind of sluggish and motivated, honor that.
And gently bring in some actions that are more on the mobile and maybe even spontaneous side because spring really loves that. We don't want to get mired down in the slow and the dull. And we want to be able to slowly increase the that opposing light mobile energy so that way we can ease on into spring in a very tender way. I'd like you to also continue to do a practice we talked about in January choosing juicy practices from Mia birdsongs juicy January practices. These are practices that are fluid, deep, pleasurable, nourishing, sustaining and supporting friends, we are looking always to sustain and support ourselves. Everything we do now is for a later time when we need it, not just right now, pepper in opportunities for lightness, for playfulness for nurturing for revitalizing it remember that spring is not meant to be fixed or rigid. So allow for fluidity and organic movements and actions allow for fluidity and organic actions and movements as you explore as you seek renewal. And as you you know, continue your growth pattern. So I'd like to check in for a moment and ask you how is this landing for you? Is it feeling super resonant? Are you feeling super seen and validated? Or is there maybe some or a lot of resistance? Of course, you know, how I am I have follow up questions. If there is resistance, where is it? And why? What is it tied to? What are the truths? And what are the lies? What are the stories? Where do you think you could benefit from making some of these shifts not just for your own personal well being, but for your collective responsibility and how you move through the world mitigating harm and increasing our authenticity, especially as you deepen the service and support you provide to others. What are your mental reframes here to help you move through the discomfort of doing things and thinking differently? Maybe you might need a mindset reset or an affirmation to support you through that resistance and discomfort I know I do often. So maybe these thoughts these phrases may resonate with you where I am is okay. I'm safe. Not everything is urgent or needs to be rushed. Life is hard, I'm dealing with a lot and needing more dormancy is okay. I know I can do more or do things differently, or do things I enjoy that uplift my spirits. And that is okay too. I will look for moments to sit in the sunlight to be in the sunlight to be uplifted in the sunlight while I use this time to regenerate. And like I said maybe these phrases you know, that doesn't have to be a whole affirmation for you. Maybe you know, it resonates all of it. Some of it, maybe some of it doesn't. And that's okay. Perhaps this just opens the door to help you start to get going in. You know, developing some mindset resets mindset reframes for yourself. And in case all of this is resonating with you, and you're still feeling like there is a massive or maybe just big enough now in between your understanding and actually feeling supported. To take action on this. No, you're not alone. And you don't have to do this alone. Remember, I have a couple of avenues of support for you. You can jump into the disruptors guide to self care. It's a free resource on my website that talks all about liberation focused self care, and walks you through creating a sustainable path for your practice of choice. And this is a practice this pathway that I work with, with all of my clients and I utilize myself as well. And if you're feeling like you need some more concentrated one on one time with me, I encourage you to book a release the pressure call, here's how it works. We'll meet on Zoom, we'll block off 90 minutes for zoom called the disc to discuss what you're experiencing and how you want to feel as you move through life. And we don't have to use all the 90 minutes if you don't need that long. And we'll work on getting clarity, you know working through dealing with the barriers that you're facing and considering steps to meet the resistance and discomfort because they'll always be there. And then you're going to get some customized self care time. I'm going to offer you some simple simple shifts to your practices based on your available time and energy. So that you can begin exploring releasing the pressure of this pressure cooker you might feel like you're in little by little so that you can begin to move in the direction you want to go without guilt shame shuts in judgment and with some more ease. So my friend, you can find all this information on my website, www dot Steff gallante.com. For the release the pressure call, you'll click on the work with me page or release of pressure. And for the disrupter guide to self care. There's a pop up that comes up right when you get onto my website or There's a button you can click right on the homepage. Now until next time, my friend, please be kind and gentle to yourself just as you would to those who are most precious to you. Whether that's another human or it's an animal baby or a plant, you know, or if you're new, you might not know I love, love, love to hear your thoughts about everything, anything that I talked about in these episodes. So please share them with me reach out whether it's via email, Instagram, however it is, you and I are connected. Don't feel weird about it. I really love to hear from you. And if you're so inclined, and I hope you will please leave a rating and or a review or both. Wherever it is that you listen, my friend, you are a badass and you are enough. Now go be your favorite self and be well
