Reprogram Your Brain to Achieve Any Goal with John Assaraf
11:02AM Apr 14, 2023
Speakers:
Angela Foster
John Assaraf
Keywords:
people
brain
self image
affirmation
thoughts
question
create
reinforced
pattern
beliefs
true
step
listening
marathon
learn
achieve
encode
feeling
emotions
practice
I know how to achieve health, wealth relations, career and business goals more today than at any other point in our history. So if that's the truth, then the question comes back to what you said, Well, why don't people reach more of their potential?
Iran's hope you're well, I'm feeling very upbeat after having some time away on vacation with my family, and kind of 30 degree heat, which was absolutely lovely until we kind of landed back in the UK to the rain. But I'm hoping that spring is on its way somewhere soon. But I have something to cheer you up today. And to help you turn your goals into reality, because today I am chatting to the amazing John Assaraf, who is a behavioural neuroscience researcher. He's also an incredibly successful entrepreneur. Unless you've been living under a rock, you've probably heard or seen John Assaraf featured on TV, he's been in 11 different movies, including the blockbuster hit the secret, and quest for success with Richard Branson, and the Dalai Lama. He's the author of four books, including two New York Times bestsellers that have been translated into 35 languages, and he's the creator of the inner size movement. And he's going to show us how to train our brain today. In this episode, I really enjoyed chatting to John, I learned a tonne, and I think you will, too, with so without further delay, let me introduce you now to the lovely John Assaraf. I'm here today with John Assaraf. I'm really excited to have you on the show, John, first of all, a very warm welcome.
Thank you. It's so great to be with you.
It's really amazing. You've been such an inspiration to me when I've been making that transition over the last kind of five or six years from corporate lawyer, turned entrepreneur. And yeah, it's just really inspiring the work you do and how you really help people kind of unlock the hidden power of their brain and achieve their goals. I guess my first question to you would be, what do you think is the main obstacle that's holding so many people back from really achieving their best lives?
I think I can sum it up in one word, but it's going to have some some depth to it. So the number one thing is ignorance. Now, when I use the word ignorance, you know, some people think, you know, I'm saying stupidity, but ignorance just means not knowing. And so the question is, what is it that you don't know, or believe to be true? That really isn't? So when we think about behaviour, first question I ask is, if we think about, you know, it's 2023 right now, you know, mankind in one species or another has been around, you know, Earth for about 200,000 years. And so we've learned a lot about what we do, why we do it, why we don't do the things we know we should do. But one of the things that we've really started to discover, let's say in the last 20 years is a little bit more of how does our brain work? And we all have a brain, hopefully, right? Structurally, it's the same functionally, it's the same. And so if we have this brain that we believe is worth at least $100 billion, which sounds crazy, but if we can't even replicate it for $100 billion, is it possible that we just haven't learned how to use our brains better, and we've become conditioned. And we've become hypnotised, you know, by what society expects us to achieve? What the career that we've chosen, what ethnicity we are, what, you know, whether we're male or female, and the question that I asked people is, do you believe that, you know, you have incredible potential? Most people say, Yeah, I believe that. And then I say, Well, why aren't you achieving more of your potential? And most people go, I don't know. But the answer does exist, right? We know how to get healthier and stay healthier. We know how to make 2345 1020 times more money, we know how to be in a healthier, better relationship with Adam more spiritual connectivity. We know how to achieve health, wealth relations, career and business goals more today than at any other point in our history. So if that's the truth, then the question comes back to what you said, Well, why don't people reach more of their potential one, have they achieved their fullest potential? And it's really going to boil down to only one of four things. Number one, is they lack the knowledge and skills right so I don't know how to go from here to there. I just don't have the knowledge and skills. Okay, great. Right now, as we're speaking, there's an entire revolution happening in the world with artificial intelligence, and the most powerful super computers we have ever had available in the hands of every human being on their phone or computer. Would you agree with that?
Yeah, absolutely.
I can go to, let's say, chat, GPT or Bing. And I can type in any question I want. And all the information that has ever been gathered on that topic is available to me to you to person, the person is watching for free. And I can ask him any question I want. And it'll give me the answer. It'll give me the process and give me the system. It'll give me the resources give me the tools that I need right now, to eliminate my ignorance. So we cannot use I don't know anymore as an excuse, it's gone. Now, let's go to another area. When you and I were born, then everybody that's watching or listening, you know, was born. You know, let's see if we can get some some fundamental agreements together. We were born with some incredible potential yes or no? Yeah, absolutely. Were was there any human being ever? There's been 105 billion humans who have walked Planet Earth so far as any human being ever been born with one belief about themselves about their potential about whether they're good enough, smart enough, worthy enough? Whether was there any belief wired into the human brain?
No, unless we look at maybe like some epigenetic tax, right, but there's no beliefs. There's
no belief? Yeah, absolutely. Was Was any human ever born with a fear? A fear, a fear, a fear of driving, you know, fear of failing, a fear of succeeding and failing a fear of being embarrassed or ashamed or ridiculed, or judged? Or rejected or unloved? Was any human being ever born with any of those? And the answer's? No. Was any human being born ever with a self image of herself? self worth, self esteem? The answer is no, no, no, no, no. So then the question becomes, is it possible that what I learned to believe with all of the evidence that I have to support it drives some of my thinking drives some of my emotions drive my behaviour? The answer is yes. Does my self image of myself my identity, determine what I believe I deserve? does it determine what I will do or not do? Of course, if I'm afraid of failing, and you're not, will that change our behaviours? Based on my fear? Of course, so there's four things that really hold us back. One is lack of knowledge and skills, we've taken that off the table. Okay, now you can bridge the gap between what you don't know and what you need to know and what you need to do in literally minutes. Then number two is what if I have beliefs that are limiting me? What is a belief in the human brain? Like what is it? Let's go underneath the surface, right, everybody wants to tell the time, but nobody wants to understand how the little watch works. But let's go into understand how the little watch works. And so belief is nothing more than a pattern that was created and reinforced over time starting in childhood, you know, child could, and then those patterns got reinforced regardless of whether they were true. Regardless of whether they were empowering, progressive, whether they were destructive progressive, whether we're constructive, regardless of whether they're positive or negative doesn't make a difference. The brain is agnostic to truth or fiction.
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So anything that I learned to believe became reinforced. And if it became reinforced, I automatically see and think and feel and behave in alignment with what I believe some of what I believe is empowering, constructive and positive. Some of what I believe is disempowering, destructive and negative. So if I want to have more empowering constructive beliefs, can I deliberately and consciously activate and create a new belief system neuro roads? In my own brain? Yes, that's the evolution that we're at right now. I can deliberately and consciously refired to rewire my brain. part one, part two, the image I have of myself, my self worth my self esteem, my self confidence, my certainty. Isn't that also a pattern that's been reinforced from my parents, my teachers, my school, my education, my brothers, my sisters, my friends, society, television, radio, internet, isn't my self image of myself just a neural pattern that was created from the time I was born until now. And then it was reinforced over and over and over again. Well, can I alter my self image of myself? Can I upgrade my identity, I want to give you an example. Imagine for just a moment that somebody in in Bollywood or Hollywood, you know, is, let's say in the UK looking for talent. And you know, the person you know that's watching right now, or are listening right now is sitting in a little coffee shop and they feel a tap on their shoulder. And it's one of their favourite actors or actresses. And the actor actress says, Hey, listen, I've been watching you from the other table over there. And I'm reading this script, you know, for a movie that I'm going to start in. And I think there's a five minute role for you in this movie. Would you be willing to look at this script that you've never seen before? And if you like it, I'll pay you a million dollars to act it for five minutes. And let's say you oh my god, you want me to pretend that I'm this role? Well, what's it about? And you get excited and you get curious, and you realise, oh, my God, I don't know how to act. Like I've never taken acting lessons. Like, what am I supposed to do? And your favourite Hollywood or Bollywood actor actor says, Don't worry about that. Do you want to do it, we'll pay a million dollars, it might be at a ward there for you. And we'll teach you everything you need in order to become that role so that when we film six months from now, you know, your five minute piece? What's the process? If you said yes to that role that you've never seen before? What would be the process to create the patterns that go from it's difficult? That's hard. I'm a clumsy beginner, I don't know how to do this. To six months from now, you being in front of a camera, and you nailing and hitting that roll out of the park? What would be the process of why
do you know this is super interesting, because when you look at the best actors, they literally have become that person and it is becoming your future self. Right. But a lot of people I think don't realise they can design this and step in.
So first, first, I'm clumsy beginner, I don't have any acting lessons. Am I supposed to speak really loudly? Or am I supposed to whisper am I supposed to be angry? Right, like what am I supposed to do for that role? So where am I going with this? Let's understand the brain right? So let's say you agreed you're going to do the role they give you 100,000 euros or pounds you know as your deposit for you know, taking on the role. What would be your process for becoming the rule Would you read it once or twice? Would you maybe read it until you memorise it? Would you maybe get your you know your phone out and record yourself? Would you maybe have your friends watch you? Would you maybe film yourself? Would you maybe rehearse it until what was conscious effort for you at first becomes becomes unconscious competence. And as you practice and rehearse, you encode the new pattern as you encode the new pattern, you store it as you store it and becomes part of who you are, you can retrieve it like that just like a song that you like, that you don't need the script for. So there's a process of encoding, storing and retrieving that is how the brain works. So is it possible that first you have to believe it in here before you will become it and see it out there? So I can develop new beliefs. Using that process, I can develop a new self image self worth and self esteem using that process. I became or forgot you became a lawyer using that process initially, made a decision. I kind of made me want to be a lawyer. Practice, drill, rehearse, practice, drill, rehearse, practice, drill, rehearse until what was hard, became effort less. So can I do that with my habits? For Success? Can I do that with my health wealth relationship? Of course, I can. Now, here in lies the problem. Our brain is doing a few things, you know, in billionths of a second number one is it's looking out for our safety, which is great. Number two, it's moving away from any real or imagined pain or discomfort as the second highest priority of the brain. Number three, it's doing number one and two, like conserving energy before it focuses on gain or pleasure. So I'm in a protective mode, most of the time to avoid pain, discomfort, uncertainty, doubt, fear of failure, fear of loss, fear of whatever, that's how my brain wants to react automatically, because of the number one priority is survival of the species survival of me. So there's a hierarchy you know, to change. So now I said, Okay, I need to gain gain new knowledge and skills. Oh, my God, that's going to require energy. What if it takes too long? What if I fail? What if I'm embarrassed? What if I'm ashamed? What if I look like a clumsy beginner? What if you know people, you know, reject me? What if people blame me? What people shame me? What if? What if, what if negative is how our brain operates for survival and safety. So I'm answering this in as deep of a ways I can is like what holds people back self image, limiting beliefs, and fears and lack of knowledge or skills, all of which, all of which are solvable today. Better, Faster, easier than ever before, because we know more about the mechanism that is happening within every human brain. So now, I'm so sorry for going so deep, but but it's important for everybody said that there is a problem. And there is a solution. For anybody who is committed, it's not available to anybody who's just interested.
You've got to be committed. I'm really interested in this concept of self image, I did a programme sadly, before he passed away last week towards the end of it, Bob Proctor, looking actually, at this a years programme, and part of that was creating your identity and your self image and reprogramming the mind. And it's incredibly powerful. I guess, when people as adults, I think a lot of people listening might struggle with this concept of how do I step into that version of me? And how do I define it? I love the way you've compared it to like an actor and a movie. Because I think that when we look at that, put that individual, we're so enraptured by that film, when that actor has literally become that personality. They've even gone to the gym and done extreme training protocols or change their body composition. So they look they literally become that person. I guess my question for you would be for someone listening to this, and they, they know where they want to go, they're gonna have fears, right? Because I always say, if you don't get if your goals don't give you goosebumps, they're not big enough, right? And part of that is the fear, and you've got to overcome it. But when they're looking at it, and they're stepping in, in the back of their mind is going to be that thing the whole time of like, can I really do it really is that for me, like can I be that good? How do they overcome those limiting beliefs that are kind of gnawing away and just surpass it and step into that person?
Sure. So so it may be a belief that's listening to them, you know, you know, because I'm male and female, this age or that age, I'm this colour or that colour. I live here or I live there. So the first part of Of all change has to be awareness. Right awareness of the question is awareness of what? Well, it's awareness of your thoughts, awareness of the emotions, awareness of your feelings, awareness of sensations, awareness of the behaviours you're taking, or not taking awareness of self sabotage. So awareness is what gives us choice. And first and foremost, everybody has negative thoughts, we have 6200 thoughts a day. For most people, 80 90% of them are negative, because that's what they've been ruminating on for years upon years upon years, so that just becomes the norm. So first, we want to be aware. And then we want to interrupt the negative disempowering, destructive patterns. Now, what if I was able to be aware of thoughts, emotions, feelings, sensations, behaviours. But what if I also recognise that whatever I'm aware of, I can do it in a state without judgement, without blame, without shame, without guilt or without justification, just pure awareness of a pattern. Because anything that I'm aware of right now is actually a look at history. Anything that I'm aware of right now is actually a look at history because emotions happen because of either an external stimuli or an internal stimuli, that activates neuro chemistry that causes a feeling. So if I'm just aware of the feeling, I can get a glimpse into what preceded the feeling. If I look at my results, I can get a glimpse of what are my behaviours, and I consider actions that I take or don't take our behaviours. Not taking action is a behaviour. Now, if I just became aware, and I accepted, I surrendered, and I allowed what was to be and what is to be and then I asked myself a question. If my greatest power on top of thinking, right is choice, can I in the very moment right now, can I make a new choice that will empower me that's constructive? And they'll move me towards what I want to achieve? No matter how small can I make a choice right now? That's constructive, positive and empowering to move me towards what I want and away from what I don't want? And the answer for everybody is Yes, I can make a food choice right now I can make a breathing choice right now I can make an exercise choice right now I can make a gratitude choice right? Now I can make a behavioural choice right this moment. So if I can be aware, and create a new habit of awareness plus choice is what gives me predictability of a future outcome. Now I'm taking possibilities. And now I am activating a probability mindset. And so earlier before, you know, we got on to the beginning of you know, this our Saturday, you asked me about, you know, a few questions. And how does somebody gets started. And the way you get started is you make small, easy to make choices that are empowering and constructive. And you focus on building the right process that builds the initial foundation of positive empowering, you know, peak performance thinking and emotional control and behaviours, small little decisions, build habits, habits, then can build themselves because the very nature of a habit is non thought. So if I can focus on building a positive, constructive, empowering habit, and not worry about the complexity, or the intensity at first, if I can start to think positively, if I can start to think critically, if I can start to manage my emotions first so that I can master them later. If I start asking what are the behaviours that if I took right now just moves me one step closer to an optimal result that I want? To many people are thinking about, like the end result a year from now? And one of the things that I ask a lot of my students is this is that I'll ask right here, we'd have a little bit of fun. I'm in pretty good shape. You look like you're in pretty good shape. Angela. And you know, for people who are watching or listening when asked a question, if we asked you right now, can you jog slowly a marathon right now nonstop, you know, 40 kilometres or so. So 26.2 miles, could you jog a marathon right now? Now I'm in really, really good shape. I cannot jog a marathon right now.
I would say I haven't trained endurance at this point. So that not I could probably do it, but it would hurt.
But here's a question that I asked you regardless of how much knowledge or skill you have about marathons, regardless of how much knowledge or skill you have right now, around food, diet, exercise, rest, sleep, repair, because regardless of any of your knowledge or skills right now about running and doing a marathon, regardless of your beliefs right now, regardless of your habits right now, regardless of your self image right now, regardless of your fears, right now, regardless of all those if we made a commitment together as a group to say, hey, let's agree that a year from today, a year, we are going to jog slowly, slowly, slowly a marathon. Now we can make that commitment. Here's the question. Could we start with a 32nd? Walk today? Could we learn what should I eat today? For the exercise that I'm going to be doing? Should could we learn how much sleep do I need? Could we learn the recovery? Could we learn how hard or easy to train? Could we learn how many days off and it could we learn everything we needed? If we committed to running a marathon slowly, a year from now? And we started with one minute of walking? And then we went to three minutes and 10 minutes and 20 mins? Here's what I can tell you. Every single person would make progress in 30 days. Would you agree with that? Yeah. And then would you agree that in 90 days, we'll have a much better framework for food diet exercise. Right? So 30 days from now we'd have Oh, wow. Okay, I can do a minute a day, I'm actually getting excited because I'm feeling more energetic. I'm getting some momentum. And all we have to do is make the choice of we're going to jog a marathon a year from now, and we come back to today say great, what do I need to do today? What are the one or two things I need to do today? The what are the one or two things I need to do tomorrow? What are the one or two things I need to consistently for one week, I don't have to focus on, you know, passing the finish line or raising my hands with everybody holding me afterwards. I don't have to, I can focus on that as a motivating factor. But that I come back to today, and I reduce it to the ridiculously small. So I eliminate all cognitive load from the decision,
which is key, right? Because otherwise it served the potential that you'd like a snapshot of where you are on your health journey right now with personalised advice from me on how to improve, go to your total health check.com and take my 62nd biohacking quiz. And I will send you your free health score and personalised report with recommendations on each area of my shift protocol for health optimization. Shift contains the five key pillars you need to focus on for optimal health, sleep, hormones, insights to track how to fuel your body with the right nutrition, light hydration and breath work and training for your body and mind. Go to your total health check.com To find out your score in each area and get personalised recommendations from me on how to improve it takes less than 60 seconds. And you can take the quiz as many times as you want to and track your improvement by following my guidance. Simply go to your total healthcare.com To get started. What's really interesting to me about that, because I know we were talking offline around the difference between how do how does someone we know like you were saying with things like church, GBT, just all the resources that we have online, we know we can figure out that plan in this example for the marathon, right? We can figure out how to do it, we don't know exactly how it's going to apply to us. We know the really big dream, that is I want to run a marathon. And then we know the micro steps we continue now, when you say you don't have to know every single step because it will unfold. I think that's the key that I found certainly from moving from a lawyer to moving into business, right, as a lawyer, it was very easy. I could look ahead and go, I want to become a partner, which I did. And there was a very lockstep thing where I had to move from training to associate to senior associate, I think when you move into the world of business and entrepreneurship, it's so open, right? And so you don't know exactly how you're going to get to the end goal. And it feels like you need a macro level view like we're talking about with a marathon. And then you need a micro view of what do I need to do today. So over time, the steps are almost going to appear because you start to realise you get immediate feedback, right? So I know for example, that a lot of people that follow my work and listen to my podcast, so producing more podcasts and content for them is the way to go. And I think the steps are shown. And I think that that's the bit maybe that people get confused on what to say is that they feel like they've got to fill everything again. They've got to have the whole marathon plan on day one. And then it's overwhelming.
It's just a shift in their thinking and when I'm I'm in Majorca, Spain right now, as I mentioned to you, you know, for the whole month with my wife. And at home, I have some props that I like to use, and I shared one with her earlier. But let's assume that you know, the two by two Ruby I use have a two by two or three by three, a four by four, or five by five and eight by eight and the Octagon one, and let's assume that the goal that you want to achieve is represented by the Rubik's Cube, smaller goal two by two, bigger goal, you know, five by five, here's the first question. Does somebody as it relates to your health, your business, your career, your family, whatever it is, Does somebody know how to solve the problems and the somebody know how to create the blueprint for the solution to solve whether it's a Rubik's Cube, or your business size goal that you have? Does somebody know how to do it? Yes, great. So that means the answer on how to solve this exists. I'm using this as a metaphor. So if somebody knows how to solve this, that means first and foremost, it's solvable, right? So now I can shift my thinking, but I don't know how to do this, too. I don't know how to do this. Who does? Can I learn? part one? Part two, is? I don't believe that I can do this. And the question is, is that true? So maybe I don't believe I can do this on my own. Because I've tried on my own to do this. And it's really hard. Even the two by two is hard. But if I went to you, too, because I was committed to solving this, could I in less than 10 minutes solve this? Because an expert could walk me through step by step to do this? Doesn't matter whether it's the two by two or the five by five? No, but if you want to solve the five by five, why not at least learn the fundamentals of the two by two first? Right. So I may not have the belief that I can do it. But what if I switched? If I had help? Could I do it? Oh, yeah. So then I can do it. Now. I just need to learn how so now we eliminate some limiting beliefs. Right? What about fear? I have a fear that I can't do this, or I have a fear that if I try and I fail, you know, I'm not, I'm gonna reinforce I'm not good enough, not smart enough, not worthy enough, or that I'm going to be rejected, ashamed or ridiculed, Judge whatever it is, well, is that really true? Like, and if it's true that I'm going to be ashamed, ashamed of what tribe? Like, can we not switch reframe what we determine failure is, cannot we reframe? You know, that we're clumsy beginners? And that's okay. Can we not reframe, you know, a negative into a positive? Can we not reframe things so that we are empowered instead of disempowered? Well, of course, we can now it's, oh, how do I learn that skill? Right. And then if we say, well, if I fail, then I'm not worthy enough. And so we say, Okay, so now we have a self image opportunity. Because now you're equating something you try and failing with who you are as a human being, your self image is in question. Or it's being activated because you don't think enough of yourself in a healthy way, not in an egotistical way. Well, then how would I upgrade my self image and upgrade my self worth and upgrade my identity? Oh, let's go back to the Actor's Studio story that we did. Well, why not create a new idea? Why not write it out? Why not write out the character traits of the person who has the self image self worth and self esteem that you want to have? Then why not practice? Until you become it? Not fake it till you make it?
No, no, no, practice that. Right? Well,
practising creates permanent patterns or semi semi personal practice makes permanent. So if I can practice a self image, self worth self esteem, representation of myself, I can practice a new version of myself and I can shed my old identity and upgrade to a newer one. Isn't that what a caterpillar does to become a butterfly? Is that what a snake does, you know, to get a new skin? Well, that's the metamorphosis that we can deliberately set on a path to but we have to be committed because in the process of the metamorphosis, it's goofy, right? The caterpillar is in this Mapua and it's like, Oh, my God, it's goopy until all of a sudden, you know, it starts especially it's like, Oh, my God, look at me now. Well,
we have to see.
Yeah, we have to be willing like in the middle of brain surgery, it always looks like the patient's dead. Take me right in that. We have to be willing to to say, Okay, there's going to be this goopy, clumsy beginner stage, kind of like when you learn how to walk, kind of like when you learn how to brush your teeth, kind of like when you learn how to use a fork or a knife, kind of like when you learn how to tie your shoes, kind of like when you learn how to put on a blouse, kind of like when you learn how to put on the jacket, kind of like when you learn how to like it's kind of like everything. It's it's goofy and clumsy at the beginning and tailed it becomes effort less not effort more, because we need to do effort more initially. But it becomes effortless when it goes from a conscious effort to unconscious competence. That middle stage, if we if we attend it with understanding, I know it's going to be a little bit clumsy, and uncertain, and we'll lack confidence initially. And that's okay. It's part of the process. If you recall earlier, I said, Tell me the process. If I can tell you the process, if you want to exercise and get in shape, you might be a little sore a few days if you're using weights or or using you know, Pilates or if you're, if you're if you're gonna go hiking, you're gonna be a little sore. Is that okay? Because you want the result? Yeah, you're gonna crave certain foods, is that okay? Because you want the results, you're gonna have to release some disempowering habits and create new ones, it's gonna feel a little bit uncertain at first, and you're gonna have resistance. Is that okay? Because I'm going to give you the skills to deal with that. But yeah, see, it's the absence of the awareness. It's the absence of the skill to deal with. Okay, what I have to, you know, endure, that causes the problem, because most people don't know how to manage emotions. Most people think that feelings are going to last forever. So they suppress it, or they move away from them, versus understanding the nature of what are emotions, that's ignorance. What are the different? What is the deal between emotions and feelings? Can I control my feelings? More? Of course you can. Can I become more aware? Of course, you can kind of become more focused on what I want for someone I don't want of course you can. Can I upgrade my knowledge and skill? Of course you can. But I'm going to come back, Angela, to that's only reserved for people who are committed to the change, not people who are interested, because when you're interested, you do what's easy and convenient. And you do what's comfortable. But when you are committed, you're willing to go through the discomfort of change to get to the other side.
Yeah, absolutely. And also accepting that you can't skip steps, which I think is what you're talking about there. When you've got the smaller Rubik's Cube, it's a little bit like if we were talking instead of a marathon, right? That you're going to squat 100 kilos, if you've never squatted in your life, before, you cannot load up that bar, you're going to have to learn that functional pattern and make sure you have a good foundation. Because if you skip the steps halfway through, you're going to get injured, then you're going to be all the way back slowing down. And I think it's easy, isn't it to assume that I've got to be there right now. But actually, you've got to build the foundations.
Yeah, I'm writing something down right now. Because you just triggered a thought for me. And part of I mean, there's good news and challenging news for this, right, as we live in what I just wrote out of like a fast food mentality. Yeah. You know, it's like, you know, instead of good food fast, we want fast food. And so think about, I know, I like I'm impatient. I want it now let's go, I want the result now. But I'm also experienced enough to know that, in order for me to, let's say, build a house fast, I need a foundation. You know, in order for me to earn a lot of money, I need to learn how to earn a little bit first, in order for me to, you know, become really good at saving, I need you to start the habit of saving, even if it's $1 a pound a day, right? So what a lot of people want to do is skip the foundational pieces. And so what are the foundational pieces I'm going to go back to, first, let me be aware of my patterns. Because it's the awareness gives me choices, the choice that can give me the freedoms that I want. So sometimes we have to slow down to be able to pick up speed. And they say that slow is smooth and smooth, is fast. What gives us the ability to go fast, or the right thinking patterns, the right emotional patterns, the right habitual patterns that drive the behavioural patterns. So how do I start to think the right way? And as I mentioned earlier, thinking is different than having 6200 thoughts. And I know you were you know, student of my old business partner. You may not know this, but I funded the life Success Institute with Bob are in 1995 So, so first, I want to understand that I can have random thoughts all day long every day. Some are constructive, some are destructive. And the question is, can I let go of the thoughts that don't evolve me for the better? And can I deliberately choose the right thoughts can I think in a different way about myself and about what I want to achieve so that I am more empowered, and I'm taking actions that I need to take? And then can I develop new empowering habits at the level of the success that I want? To every level of success requires a way of thinking, emotional control for that level and behaviours?
So let's get your question on that. I'm sorry. You're on here? Well, there's a couple of things that come up there, because two questions really, one is around those doors and the negativity, I think, because of so much information online, some people then feel nervous, they're like, Oh, my God, I'm not on the right vibration, I'm attracting the wrong things. To me, this is why it's such a bumpy road, because my thoughts are not in sync, right. They're not matching up. Sometimes I wake up, and I'm really, really positive, and I do my affirmations and I go work out and I'm in a really positive mindset, and I take inspired action. And then other days, I'm kind of down that that's kind of one thing where I really like you to clarify for people. And then the other thing is just how you do programme, that new neurological pattern in because with affirmations, again, I see different thoughts around this, some, some individuals will say you can reprogram exactly what you want, and repetition is key. And that was definitely something that came up in the box programme, whereas others will say what you know, your subconscious mind isn't going to accept it. You know, if you try and see you're a multi millionaire, when you've got two cents in the bank, your mind's not going to believe you. So you're going to need to have a kind of continuous tense as sort of on the way to affirmation. And I'd really love it if you could clarify that for listeners.
Sure. So let's talk about what is an affirmation? A lot of people think an affirmation is a sentence of something that is true. It's not an affirmation is affirming in one's mind. So it's what I want to be true that I'm affirming in my mind. And so sometimes I remember when I was 19, I started using affirmations and I would say, you know, and I'll use a Bob Proctor line. I'm just modifying them so great, happy and grateful for the fact that I'm earning $10,000 a month. There used to be a voice in my head that would go bullshit. That's not true. I would hear this voice go. That's not bullshit. Go away. Where's that coming from? Because listen, we know the truth. I mean, we know the truth or at stupid we're brilliant human be we know the truth. I'm not driving that car. I'm not travelling first class. I'm, we know the truth. But what if I, what if I said, Okay, critical voice? I understand. It's not true. Okay, I am putting this into my bio computer, the subconscious to make it true right now and to reinforces, please help me do this. Here's the thing that we have to understand. I have a brain. I'm not my brain. My brain is like an orchestra. Think about you know, your job is the conductor of the orchestra. And we all have this critical voice in our head member of the orchestra or the band, your job as the as the as the orchestra leader, the conductor is to quiet down that musician. Okay, when you want her to be quiet, I understand. You think that's negative, just be quiet. Now, here's what I want to play. So your job is to take the different facets and 19 different parts of the brain and conduct like an orchestra leader. And when we understand for example, that there's a part of our brain I called the The Frankenstein's monster. Frankenstein's monster, this member of the band, okay, or the orchestra? Her job is to always do this. What if that doesn't work? What if you fail? What if you lose money? What if you lose time? What if you're embarrassed? What if you're ashamed? You tried this before? This is the part of the brain it's supposed to do this. For what where do you remember earlier I said our number one priority the brain is security safety. Survival. Number two is avoidance of pain or discomfort. This part of the brain works by going into our memory bank. Okay, every billionth of a second to check and balance. Is there any information in this memory bank that would suggest this isn't true. Or this could cause pain or discomfort, and anything that it finds it brings to your confidence in that critical voice that you have that you and I hear. Now, let me shift aside for just a moment ask you a question. Would you ever get into a car on the highway or freeway? With somebody who told you I don't have brakes in my car? It's just the gas, let's go. No, probably not. Well, so you actually like the fact that they have brakes? And what about the cars today that have sensors, there's cars behind you, you're low on gas, there's a car to the right of you, you're down windshield wipers, oh, the back doors on bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, you like those sensors? Right? Well, what if you just treated that part of your brain as an automatic sensor that's going to bring to you something to be aware of. And then your decision determines what happens next. So if you listen to this voice, and you panic, right, and you get into this emotional state that disempowers you this critical voice is using your past, to predict your present and your future. So when we're talking about, you know, affirmations, I am just embedding into my memory bank, something that I want in there as a new reference point for me to lean upon, instead of all the old negative stuff. I am deliberately and consciously programming my own subconscious memory bank. And if the brain works the way it does, and that's anything that I repeat, I reinforce. So if every day I'm affirming these new ideas, these new concepts, this new self image, these new beliefs that I want to be true, then my brain says, okay, based on the third hierarchy of how the brain works, safety and security, first, avoidance of pain or discomfort, second, but conserve energy. Third, now, let me share with you how this works. Now, if my brain wants to conserve energy, how does it do that? It does it by automating monitoring thoughts. It doesn't by automating my emotions, it does it by automating my behaviours. So that can conserve energy from conscious effort to subconscious control. So if I repeat something one day, three days, 10 days, 30 days, 90 days, my brain saying you're putting a lot of energy into this, you're overriding all the old systems. You know what, let me just take this damn thing you want to believe let me automate that all of a sudden, everything just changes.
And how long does it take? So in your example, where you're looking at, for $10,000 a month, for example, your affirmation, presumably and as you're saying, I'm so happy and grateful now that I'm earning $10,000 a month, initially, your brains
like bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, versus 1010 times bullshit. 100 times bullshit a million times. You kept saying it regardless, and maybe it's possible. Right? So I could say, you know, I know it's bullshit right now. And how can I make this my reality? So I'm having self talk through my awareness. So I'm not fighting. Okay? The, the critical part deal of the little person on your shoulder that's talking negatively to yourself, I'm not fighting the emotion that's being triggered because of my old subconscious beliefs. I'm not fighting that I am managing it. And then I'm mastering over it. So it takes 66 days to 30 365 days, according to the newest research at the University of London, to re wire a certain pattern and get it to be reinforced that overrides an old pattern.
Did you with that? Would someone be saying that affirmation whatever their affirmation is, it could be a fitness goal for example. Would they be saying that once a day would they be writing it out seeing it in the mirror what how many times they use it what's the best way so I call
that inner sighs by the way, and I mentioned this to you earlier, I'm going to show you something that I created that we're going to be releasing to the world but I have this new app coming. And on this app, I'm going to have these these bursts to call wonderful, you know, wonderful bursts. And this one for example, is something I created this is something I created for myself but these are no I can achieve anything I want in life.
This is an app so people can go into
his so wonderful that prosperity flows to and through me. So this this particular one is is around mindsets called a mindset burst are about seven minutes long. I have shorter ones in longer one so whenever whenever I'm asked you know my clients, students is able to Create your own, you know, affirmations and Burson and do it and I declare I promise it's so wonderful it's a fact that have come up with about 15 different ways to say the same thing to reinforce the pattern make it easy for people to just listen emotionalize and behave in those ways because there's my collar inner sizes. So I'm always looking for creative ways to say the same thing to reinforce the programming. And so I created about 250 new inner sizes around for health wealth relationships, career business, salesmanship, emotional control, etc. And so you can you can you know, create an affirmation what happens unfortunately, with you know, let's say you take new creative, you know, 25 affirmations, and let's say listen them for a week, you get bored. Okay, so Well, what if I can say it in a different way? What I listened to that for a week? Yeah, then what if I did it this way? What if I did long ones? What if I did short ones? What if I listened to? You know, while I'm driving to work? What What if I'm listening to them while I'm putting on makeup? Could I reinforce a pattern? Okay, that is empowering, constructive, and we'll move me towards my goals. Yes, every bit of information that comes in through the eyes, the ears, the tactile senses, okay, gets encoded now, it either gets encoded into short term memory, and then it lets it go because we don't need it. Or if we repeat, it gets encoded into long term memory, I'm going to go back to encode store, easy retrieval, that's the system we want to follow. So how do I encode a new belief pattern a new self image pattern, new habitual pattern that is consistent with the behaviours I need the thinking I need the emotional control I need to achieve my goal. Well, let's come at it from a variety of different angles. Let me let me come at it from a variety of different tools. So I can I can mental contrast that same self image I could do cognitive dissonance reduction, I could do cognitive behaviour, enhancement, I could do positive psychology, I could do affirmations I could do declarations, I could do promises for the same one thing I could do 1020 different things to reinforce one pattern. And so like for me, like when people ask me like what do you do? And the answer is as much as I can like you know, I have you know, my you know, exceptional life blueprint with me while I'm travelling. I have everything in my life written out all the beliefs that I want my vision board you know, is over here like even less interesting,
I was gonna ask you this because I remember I think watching a video of yours where it was your son found in a box a house and you were living in the house that you envisaged so some people will say should be sort of general in your vision boarding and then let the universe or do you literally like football, it looks like you photo that you put photos on the property right?
Like if I if I told you you see you see this this house with like the ocean view over here. Yeah, I'm gonna I'm going to show you something Hold on a second. I'm going to do something.
Can you give me goosebumps? I'm gonna give you
goosebumps give me a second I need to make sure my Wi Fi is on. If for I just hope I don't. I don't I'm gonna unplug my my wiring I'm gonna show you some so this is just an image that I had
a house by the ocean for those of you listening you may
think you know that maybe I took that picture. And I placed it on my vision board afterwards No, no, no, that that picture was was created first. And then you know we move towards making that a reality.
How do people hold that vision in their mind and simultaneously release attachment here?
Well no differently than well we don't want to force because force negates so whatever you push pushes back like I create these images and the language patterns for the beliefs for it and the strategies for it. And then I let it go just like I know that the reality is here. I'm nuts about back up to to something that you mentioned earlier. I just want to do you believe in this for everybody do you believe I mean that we live in an abundant universe that that the answers are here that the money is here the health is here the tools the resources, the innovations are here for everybody to access? Yes or no? And if the answer is yes, then ask yourself Okay, second question is Is it a fact that everything is made up of energy and frequency vibration and I know you believe that because you studied with a dear friend of mine for a while and the answer is yeah, everything is made up you know my, my little battery charger you know the shell is energy the pen the Rubik's Cube mind Body is all made up these vibrating packets of energy we call quanta. And so is it true that if I had a radio here right now, I could turn on the radio and tune into a station rock and roll punk rock, classical music jazz, right now just by tuning in to a frequency that's here right now in this room that I'm in in Majorca, Spain on the Mediterranean. Is it true? Yeah. Well, what is yours in my brain? We have 100 trillion cells in our body, 100 billion brain cells, all emitting a frequency. And so here's the question that maybe we should ask ourselves. If I am energy, and my thoughts and emotions activate a frequency, okay of my sentient being, what am I tuning into? Am I tuning into chaos? Or coherence? Am I tuning into what I want? Or what I don't want? If my brain is acting as an electromagnetic switching station? What am I tuning into most of the time? Is it how I can and how I will and how I must and it's all possible for me right now. Or oh my god, what if I fail? What if What if I'm, what if I'm miserable? What What if I'm embarrassed when I'm to shame but if I'm really cute, what if I'm charged, every thought produces the electrical correspondence of that thought and the neurochemical of that thought, which causes this thing called a body to oscillate and vibrate at the frequency of the thought. If I keep repeating negative, disempowering, destructive thoughts, I will be vibrating and oscillating at that frequency, which means that that is the reality I am going to see and create.
So like attracts like, right?
Yeah, well, no, like does not actually attract like, right if you take a positive magnet. Right, but but but we're talking about resonance versus attraction. This is the thing that people have wrong about the law of attraction. It isn't a law of attraction, it's a law of resonance. Right? I'm gonna go back to the orchestra and the band. You know, when we hear a song that we love, why do we love it will because something in whether it's the vocals or the instruments that are in concert, is creating a vibrational field that just resonated with me, that's why you might like classical and I might go that I just hate that I'm not in resonance with its I don't like it. So I want to move away from that. Let me switch the station. And so the question that that becomes, is, are my thoughts emotions, feelings, sensations, and behaviours in concert? And if any one of those is off, you're not on the station. You're just not on the station, you're there.
How do you get those all to line up?
Focus on getting them lined up? How do you get a band to play in concert? How to get an orchestra with 50 people to play in concert? You have to first and foremost understand you are the conductor. So if you're going to let the instruments can't, you know, dictate to you, okay, great suffer, get some self control, get some self discipline. How do you practice your thoughts? How do you practice being in the emotional state? How do you practice the behaviours required to create unconscious competence? It takes practice and you know most people are not prepared to do practice because it's called work. But you practised initially becoming a lawyer, you practice the new role you practice the strategy you practice the tactics you practice a new language you practice whatever it is you want to get better at.
Yeah, sorry.
Well, this is this is the problem with magical thinking. This is the issue I had with the movie The Secret because people were led to believe it just need to think and believe and I'll achieve No, you need to add what we call is the law of Goya to the law of attraction law of Goya is the Get off your ass harass law and do the right thing in the right order at the right time. There's your formula give me the right thinking sure give me the right thoughts should give me the right emotions and feelings and sensations sure and also give me the right behaviours. Now if you don't know what the right behaviours are to get into concert when would now be a good time to learn it. Now because until you learn it you will struggle it's no different than marketing your business until you learn it you have somebody who knows how to do marketing and selling you will not do well in business Period End of story until you stop eating like shit and sleeping poorly and not taking care of you know your your emotional state around you know stress you will suffer not because you have to because you've chosen not to. Yeah,
that's so true. And you can write and I'm testament to this you can go for wherever you are right now, because I was you know, very depressed fighting for my life in hospital with suicidal thoughts on not Just antidepressant but anti psychotic medication. And I was told by my psychiatrist, you know, there is a real risk to your health if you ever come off medication, and it was slow, but I completely reprogrammed my thoughts daily, I had to practice and practice until I finally was completely medication free, and have maintained that way. And it just shows you can but as you say, you got to do your work, right. But it's so worth it.
It's so worth it. When you're committed. There's always a way when you're not there's always a problem. Yeah, it's true. Angela, I have to take our guests to the airport. We did.
And I was just gonna say, where can people find you? Because I think we spoke before you go. You have a free event every Saturday where people can actually engage with this and get help. Please link to that. So because I know the audience is soon going to want to join.
I think if they want to win the game of money, we have the brain Athan that they can join on Saturday. And it's me and other world leading brain experts and motivational experts and success experts about seven of us, and we'll teach you how to break free from the mental and emotional and strategical obstacles that are in your way and it's going to brain Athan 123 dot com brain Athan 123 dot com or just find some of my work on John srf.com. And there's more than enough information there lots of other free stuff.
Amazing. Thank you so much, John, for coming on the show. It's been a joy to have you on forever.
Great connecting with you also. Bye everyone.
Thank you for listening to today's show and for your interest in health optimization for high performance. If you're new to my podcast, you may be interested to know that you can get a free health score and report complete with personalised recommendations on how to optimise your sleep, nutrition fitness and resilience in the top link in the show notes below. I hope you enjoyed this episode. Links to everything we talked about are also in the show notes and if you enjoyed today's show, please subscribe for more