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Listening to the Mind | Otter.ai

Listening to the Mind

John Pulleyn51min

Dhara Kowal

00:04

Today is the fifth day of this June 2024 seven day sesshin. And I'm going to continue with reading from the book subtle sound, the Zen Teachings of Maureen Stewart. Then I go to chapter 23, titled, listening to the mind

Dhara Kowal

00:38

listening to the mind, this mind that's been calling out to us throughout the sheen the chorus of birds and frogs the gentle rain breeze drifting through the Zendo.

Dhara Kowal

01:21

Marine Roshi begins the mind is not an individual matter. It does not belong to our egocentric consciousness. The more we give up that egocentric consciousness, the more we experienced the mind as free and joyful. Through our Zen practice, all the junk gets swept away. We feel the Dharma light shining everywhere. The Universal wakefulness that is, every one of us, shows itself more clearly, every minute

Dhara Kowal

02:22

showing itself right now

Dhara Kowal

02:30

whatever you're experiencing right now

Dhara Kowal

02:41

that's the Dharma, shining bright. Whatever it is, inviting you to look, listen

Dhara Kowal

03:02

just this

Dhara Kowal

03:12

she goes on, somebody told me about hearing an extraordinary musical performance and wondered if this was buddha mind. Now this may be an expression of buddha mind, but it is not buddha mind. What is buddha mind? buddha mind is with us every single breath. How we express this buddha mind is another story. buddha mind is not some thing it's not an object. It's not outside us it's not a mirror. It is not a tree is not this or that

Dhara Kowal

04:12

and as soon as we try to label it, describe it explain it. We've lost it. We've cut it off

Dhara Kowal

04:28

kind of like the fire fireflies that light up of a orchard here at Chapin Mill at night. Such a brilliant display of our true nature

Dhara Kowal

04:53

but as soon as we name it, label it we separate ourselves

Dhara Kowal

05:09

then in a footnote, Maureen Roshi says that the reference to buddha mind not being a mirror, nor a tree, nor this or that comes from the verses of Shenzhou and way none. There's this legendary story that goes with the verses. And, in the book, Zen's, Chinese heritage, Andy Ferguson says that there isn't much evidence to say that the story is true. He says, and yet it remains a cornerstone of Chinese religious culture. I'm going to paraphrase, to give a short version of the story. One day, the fifth ancestor, Hungarian, told the assembly of monks to express their understanding in a poem to be written on a wall. whomever's poem demonstrated true realization would be chosen as the sixth ancestor. The head monk Shan Soo, who happened to be the most educated among the monks, wrote the following verse. The body is the tree of wisdom, the mind, but a bright mirror at all times, diligently polish it to remain untainted by dust. Dylan should diligently polish to remain untainted by dust

Dhara Kowal

07:20

and we can say is Zen the process of Zen does just that clears away the dust clears away thoughts. Thoughts are like dust they have no substance to them

Dhara Kowal

07:47

single particle of dust is so tiny. You can't even see it

Dhara Kowal

08:00

and it's so light has no weight gets carried away by the slightest breeze

Dhara Kowal

08:24

next, according to the legend, way nun who was illiterate and wasn't yet even ordained as a monk sought help from another monk in order to write his verse on the wall. Way nuns verse read. Fundamentally, no wisdom tree exists nor the stand of a mirror bright since all is empty from the beginning, where can the dust alight?

Dhara Kowal

09:16

From the very beginning there's not a single thing. And it was with that verse. That homerun chose way none as the sixth ancestor.

Dhara Kowal

09:43

Getting back to marine Roshi, she says what is it? We are here to experience this mind. And then we show it in our ordinary lives in musical performance tenses in cooking in cleaning in whatever way we show it in being a mother, a father, a friend, a lover, whatever. Yo Yo Ma plays the buck sweets for unaccompanied cello in a way that is a spiritual treasure. Anyone who listens cannot help but feel that this is a buddha mind expressing itself. Your your mom may not know anything about Buddhism, but his buddha mind is shining through. It's completely selfless. It's a completely selfless kind of music making. Completely giving up to the true spirituality of Bach, who was a deeply spiritual man himself says sheen, is a time in which we can experience this buddha mind very deeply. There is a lightness, a deep, joyful spirit. We feel this by opening our hearts we open up completely letting our 84,000 pores breathe this in. It's a treasure

Dhara Kowal

11:58

that said, we know that at any given moment, throughout the course of session, it may not feel so light, bright and joyful. There are times when we feel exhausted, spent scattered. Stuck spinning our wheels there are so many forms of mind states that we run into mental, emotional, psychological, physical. And when we experience them, and I'm saying when we do not if when we experience them we need to allow ourselves to let let it go to not linger in them. Not to allow them to morph into an excuse for wallowing in self pity or self judgment.

Dhara Kowal

13:41

Same thing goes with extremely pleasant, seductive mind states. It's all dust and all of it and yet it's part of our true nature that we all share. There's nothing about us that's removed from our true nature. And even when we don't notice it when we don't see it it's still there. Still accessible. And it's also the case whether we believe it or not.

Dhara Kowal

14:38

Even if you dismiss or don't believe in enlightenment. It doesn't change who we fundamentally are. Each one of us, without exception All beings

Dhara Kowal

15:08

then she says, when such Sheen is over, and we go back to whatever our lives are, we go back with a feeling of a deep bond to one another. Without ever having said a word. This bond is not one of attachment or dependence. We don't think to ourselves, I can't sit without those wonderful people around me. It's quite a different story. It's a sense that we have all experienced something marvelous together. And again, without saying a word, we have been working together, eating together, doing all these things together, in harmonious condition. That is truly a treasure.

Dhara Kowal

16:18

Sangha is a treasure sesshin is a treasure. We are so fortunate to be here to do this work together. And when I say here, not just at Chapin Mill, but the folks on Zoom. It's all incredibly precious. No one can say not one of us can say that we will ever have this opportunity again. We just don't know.

Dhara Kowal

16:59

We're now in the second half of sesshin. And this is where there is so much potential thoughts have settled? It doesn't mean that they've disappeared altogether. Remember, it's what the brain does. They still might be swirling about just doing what thoughts do just as the rain does what it does.

Dhara Kowal

17:45

But they have far less of a grip on us now, after all this Zen we've been doing. And as long as we continue this effort, so long as we don't put it down. That grip is going to loosen even more gotta trust this process.

Dhara Kowal

18:23

Then she says, one of our Sangha members came to me and said, she was going away for a few months. What shall I do? How shall I support my practice? She asked me, I'm going to Europe and I will be living in hotel rooms. And I don't know how I will carry on. I said, sit down and take a deep breath. And you will be right here. We are together wherever we are. When we just sit down and take a deep breath

Dhara Kowal

19:16

wherever we are, are always together. Nothing separate. This is impossible to fathom with our rational mind beyond time and space, insists Shane outside of sesshin just this one single mind

Dhara Kowal

19:53

recently, there have been a number of people over the past last few months, actually that have been asking me where's Buffy? I don't see her on the pond anymore. Where's Buffy? Where did she go? For those of you who don't know about Buffy she, although we're not really sure if she's a she might be he might be they don't know. We'll go with she. She's a domestic goofs that landed on the Chapin Mill property a few years ago. And she had been living here ever since. We have no idea really, where she came from. She kind of one day was, I think during the month of February, there was still a lot of snow on the ground, and she kind of just dropped from the sky and landed behind the barn. And she caught our attention because we could hear her distinctive Hunk and she started while waddling around doing what a goose does. No problem. At first, we called her hunker seemed appropriate. But then it was discovered that the type of goose she is is an American buff, a kind of domestic goose. And so, Wayman immediately came up with a better name, Buffy and it stuck.

Dhara Kowal

21:57

And she had been here for years. Just kind of like the mascot of Chapin Mill, everyone was used to seeing her when they came for a session. And everyone took delight in her presence. The kupilka family took really good care of her feeding her checking in on her in the winter. You know, because she's a goose, she has her own goose jacket. So she had no problem with our winters. goose down and was just so wonderful to see how she would casually hang out with any kind of other waterfowl that landed on the pond, Canada geese, mallards hood, hooded mergansers. It didn't matter. She hung out with them all.

Dhara Kowal

23:07

But then, just a few months ago, she disappeared we're so used to seeing her every day. At first we weren't very concerned. Because she was known to hide in in the reeds, especially when it's cold out. And she could spend days, even weeks in there. But time passed, and weeks and weeks went by was a really long stretch. No sighting of her no sighting of Buffy Where did she go? Eventually, we discovered that she managed to fly over to the next pond. The next body of water located just north of here and part of the neighboring community called Horseshoe Lake we were all quite relieved to find that she was thriving there. And not surprisingly everyone fell in love with her there is no doubt that her travels have brought many people as well as other waterfowl together in new ways. There is this beautiful bonding that happened around birth See

Dhara Kowal

25:05

what can we say that Buffy is no longer here? Here? Can we really say that

Dhara Kowal

25:20

she's now over there and not here. That's just one side of the coin from side of our true nature, the relative side, she's actually still here, she's in the Zendo right now. Doesn't matter what pond or lake she's on the notion that she's not here is a thought, just a thought. A thought that arises out of separation

Dhara Kowal

26:14

the same goes with our loved ones, both living and dead. We can sit here in such sheen, and even be thinking about them, the people in our lives, how we miss them, how we wish we could have said this or that to them. Wish we could have spent more time with them. Perhaps even regretting being here in sesshin because it means time away from your family dwelling in these kinds of thoughts of separation surreal misunderstanding of what we're doing here we're doing Zen not just for ourselves and not just for our family, not just for all humans, but all beings with our number

Dhara Kowal

27:26

are doing Zen without any thought of separation from anyone or anything

Dhara Kowal

27:39

and are being here right now. Comes out of us being totally intertwined completely interconnected. Tightly woven tangle of beings got us here to this very moment

Dhara Kowal

28:12

our ordinary way of dividing up the world and placing everyone in everything in some category some box conceals this truth we need to drop it we need to give ourselves completely to the practice not to

Dhara Kowal

28:56

marine Roshi then goes on. We are all supporting each other, wherever we are in the world. Without saying, let me do this for you, you poor thing. How will you get along without us? No, no, just by being present. And as I've said many times, you're Zen is your best teacher. So Zen washes away all conceptual thought and makes the mind clear and fresh. You all have your own Zen Mind. So listen to it

Dhara Kowal

29:48

gathers the there are so many teachers in our lives. Zen being the most important One because we wouldn't notice these other teachers without it

Dhara Kowal

30:10

teachers, candles, doorknobs, flowers, birds toothbrushes, towels, forks, bowls, all teachers all inviting us to look to pay attention

Dhara Kowal

30:58

she continues, your Zen Mind teaches you about just how far you are going, just how much you trust. Just how willing you are to believe in this mind. Just how clearly you are coming to understand with your bones, your skin, your marrow, what this is about. Through your Zen, you are giving up your discriminating attitudes and becoming absolutely clear and still. Sometimes, you experience great pain yet you remain sitting, sitting, sitting, not giving up a week to everything. Sometimes it's noisy outside, chainsaws, children playing people laughing and talking. It's all okay. Because you're awake to everything to every single thing. If somebody makes noise in the Zendo It's okay. If somebody cries, it's fine. cars go by and beep no problem. Planes fly overhead fine cat's meow dogs bark good nothing is a disturbance when your Zen condition has become firm and clear. All judgmental attitudes about whether or not those noises are disturbing simply fall away

Dhara Kowal

33:04

the only way one can feel disturbed by sound or by anything else is by clinging to thoughts about it

Dhara Kowal

33:23

and when we let the thoughts be when we just coexist with them without pushing them away or lingering in them they just kind of fade to the background

Dhara Kowal

33:50

and then we can experience in the stillness of mind. life as it is it's revealed to us moment by moment.

Dhara Kowal

34:27

She then says it's one thing to sit in ideal conditions in the Zendo but we need to be ready to sit anywhere. On the streetcar on the bus, anywhere in the world goes on the sounds go on the raindrops fall, the wind blows and we are learning and all this acceptance of it through our bodies which sits still no matter what

Dhara Kowal

35:15

if you want to memorize things in books about how to practice fine but it's not the same is it? You don't read the menu to taste the food you don't read the menu to taste the food during such sheen someone may ask me why am I doing this? Why am I going through so much pain? Is isn't there some easier way but at the end of session, that same person may say to me, Well, I understand now. You it feels good. In fact, it feels wonderful. So I will go through it again and again. And again keep coming back to sesshin to taste that food, really taste it

Dhara Kowal

36:51

this time of year is the start of strawberry season. Speaking of food and let's say you've never tasted a strawberry before and if I were to describe to you what the most perfectly ripe strawberry tasted like could you taste it and even if you had tasted such a strawberry before and you remember it is that the same as experiencing it directly? Is that the same as taking that bite right into it

Dhara Kowal

38:04

into that sweet flesh, the sweet smell the soft texture those are just thoughts and memories

Dhara Kowal

38:24

they're not the real thing. And the same goes for anything else that we taste touch, see hear feel. All the sensory inputs that we receive are receiving them right now. We're never not receiving them and they're amazing

Dhara Kowal

38:57

even the ones that are bitter or taste spoiled just as the sensation of physical pain exhaustion

Dhara Kowal

39:27

sensations are all Buddha. They're all mind

Dhara Kowal

39:42

she says we cannot wait for some other time to experience this. Today is a wonderful day. Today is a fresh day. Or as a woman said every day is a good day. Every day is a good day. Sitting in a posture that's strong and grounded with a mind that is still and composed, not dead, but dynamically composed, buoyant and joyful, we maintain this condition, without any pressure, without any pushing, without any gaining idea. Now trying to get something, make something happen

Dhara Kowal

40:39

NGO said, to guard and maintain the essential teachings of Buddhism must be the vocation of the noble soul. To guard and maintain the essential teachings of Buddhism must be the vocation of the noble soul, to guard and maintain the essential teachings of Buddhism. We are here sitting going directly to what needs to be done

Dhara Kowal

41:26

here we have all these teachings of Buddhas and ancestors that have been passed down from generation to generation. Your words were recorded, documented, shared, over and over, recite, recited. They do help us to find our way but they're not a substitute for the practical wisdom, that arises from saw Zen from the doing and ultimately even the teachings even the Dharma the words the sutras saw empty nothing special or holy about them. They're a bunch of words they're not a substitute for practice. The only way we can bring the Dharma to life is to activate it in our own way through our own effort directly our own experience not somebody else's but how do we do it? seems impossible. Especially if we've been practicing for a long time and feel like we're getting derailed over and over again derailed by our wanting grasping mind, wanting things to change. Even then matter how long whatever it takes. We just need to trust the method. Trust our practice each one of us is the guardian at the temple gate

Dhara Kowal

44:02

no one can guard our practice for us. Not even a teacher.

Dhara Kowal

44:29

Another source of inspiration that has a Chapin Mill connection this time of year is the behavior of snapping turtles. Maybe you've seen them this time of year at Chapin Mill female snapping turtles leave the pond And they trudge on to land, looking for a place to dig a hole and lay their eggs. They build their nests in dirt or gravel by digging down with their big claws. The hole is about maybe six to eight inches wide and it's called a clutch. And it's really, really perilous work for these turtles. They cross roads they can travel quite far from their home, their aquatic home in the pond looking for the right spot, the ideal spot to lay their eggs. One that will likely be safe from potential predators. This is not easy to do. There are a lot of risks involved. And the survival of future generations depends on it. But despite what a monumental task, this is, these turtles these snapping turtles move very slowly. Calmly steadily, naturally they don't rush about they don't fuss they're not even disturbed by passerby guys can walk right by them and be pay you know mind. They're not disturbed by cars either. Just know mindedly do what needs to be done. They follow their calling and they do it.

Dhara Kowal

47:47

As marine Roshi says, we are cutting off all extraneous matters, no blinking, no hesitation, going straight ahead. Who is the noble soul? Who is this person without rank? Forget about it. Forget about seeking Buddha, forget about words, forget about this outside self. The true person without rank, the noble soul is within us. There is no noble soul without only when we experience it in this way, in our own words and lives, do the vivid words and actions of our ancestral teachers come forth. Someone came to me and said it makes it makes me very happy to discover that all those ancient teachers words are, after all true. Indeed, become the person of no rank, become the noble, the noble soul and live in this awakened way, not imitating anyone. Whatever the circumstances your life asks of you. respond to them in your own individual, Zen spirited way. Don't waste any time trying to be someone else's experience. We are here to have our own vivid experience. So please don't cling to yesterday to what happened to what didn't happen and do not judge today by yesterday. Let us just live today to the fullest moment after a moment. Each sitting is the only sitting

Dhara Kowal

50:00

Let us just live right now. Just just this Forget everything else forget everything. I said, Forget everything marine Roshi said Forget everything anyone has said

Dhara Kowal

50:33

just this

Dhara Kowal

50:49

we'll stop here and just recite the Four Vows

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