4 Fundraising Tips to Transform Your Fundraising - Mallory Erickson

9:07PM Aug 8, 2023

Speakers:

Becky Endicott

Jonathan McCoy

Mallory Erickson

Keywords:

fundraising

donor

people

partners

feel

organization

good

mallory

philanthropy

clients

fundraiser

talk

work

perfectionism

feeling

board member

meeting

fear

audacious

vulnerability

Hey, I'm Jon.

And I'm Becky.

And this is the We Are For Good podcast.

Nonprofits are faced with more challenges to accomplish their missions and the growing pressure to do more, raise more and be more for the causes that improve our world.

We're here to learn with you from some of the best in the industry, bringing the most innovative ideas, inspirational stories, all to create an Impact Uprising.

So welcome to the good community, where Nonprofit Professionals, philanthropist world changers and rabid fans who are striving to bring a little more goodness into the world.

So let's get started. Hey, Becky, what's happenin

just here to talk about one of my most favorite people ever. That's on the podcast today. Mallory Erickson. I know

every time that Mallory comes in here, just like it's our phone a friend, I always call her our phone a friend moment because I want you to know,

a moment. I remember when we first lifted this conversation, it was our first time to meet Mallory. And I was still in major gift officer recovery mode, like coming out of 20 years of thinking I had to operate in a certain way to close gifts. And Mallory comes into our house, in straight schools us.

In the best of ways she comes at fundraising with a completely different lens, she has this unique ability to combine the technical aspects of how to be a brilliant fundraiser that pairs it with coaching and pairs it with addressing how do we address actually the the root fears and the discomforts around asking for money are talking about money. And she has just got the secret sauce that we believe will transform your fundraising plan, whether you are new to this or whether you are seasoned, there is something here for you.

And I just think we are kind of winding down the summer of evolution, which has been so good for us for this community, I think for the sector. And we have heard from so many of you who have like just kind of virtually raise your hands and said, I really want to lean in to doing this work differently. I am committed to growing myself. And I know that by growing myself, I'm going to grow my mission, my organization. And so we really wanted to lift this episode because Mao's sharing this, these four fundraising tips that are going to transform your fundraising and just hold on to your rear ends, folks, because these are disruptive. And all of it is shared through the glimpse of this power partners formula that she's uniquely crafted. And y'all this is the only fundraising course that we've seen that's designed to make fundraising simple and easy. And it takes care of you. And my gosh, it works. And so we had to hold cord for an entire episode to talk about it.

Yep, and here's the serendipitous thing, Mallory's power partners formula is only open at certain times of the year. And this happens to be one of those times. And so we wanted to encourage you because like we said, we've seen people in the community go through this program and be transformed. And we want to offer that same idea to you. So to discover everything and even watch a webinar with Mallory to really give you an introduction and start to equip you with value that you're going to find in this course head to we're for good.com/power partners. So very simple. We are for good.com/power partners, and we are going to get you hooked up with all the resources and confidence you need to really finish off this year really strongly.

So learn more, check out the link Jon referenced it's we're for good.com backslash power partners. And after that effusive intro, we are so excited to say hi Mallory. Welcome to the we're for good podcasts. We are so glad you're here. Oh, thank

you so much for having me. I'm thrilled to be here and love you guys and geek out on you guys just as much. So I'm glad that the feeling's mutual.

It's a big ol love fest here. So kind of give our listeners a little bit of background into your career journey, your work and what led you to where you are today.

Yeah, so I have been in the nonprofit sector, my entire career, I have done sort of every job and nonprofit you can imagine. I joke other than tech. So you know, I've been a program director, Managing Director, Executive Director, you know, worked in a number of sort of grassroots roles. And once I started to move my way up in the nonprofit sector, fundraising expectations came with the territory, as many of us know so well. And if you'd asked me when I was an executive director, what my least favorite part of of my job was, I would have without a doubt, said fundraising. And that's because, yeah, which I think I hear all the time. Right. Everyone's just kind of nodding. So you know, I and that was because I was sent to sort of all the traditional fundraising trainings like here's how you have a major donor meeting and here's how you send this corporate sponsorship email and here's how you do this thing. But nobody really talked to me about the underlying discomfort that came from asking for money and and building relationships around money and just the vulnerability that exists in with money in general. And I went through an executive coach training program which I at the time was not connected to my fundraising at all. But I learned through that training all these tools and tricks and just built this tremendous awareness that I didn't have before. And it completely changed my fundraising. I mean, I took an organization from a million dollar under a million dollars to 3.5 really quickly with these tools that I sort of built out and adopted from that executive coach training program. And what I found when I started to talk to other fundraisers about oh, my gosh, I feel like I found this secret to fundraising that like nobody's talking about, you know, most people were like, Oh, my gosh, like, Tell me about it. I want that to some people were like, Whoa, you're kind of taboo, you're gonna talk about the elephant in the room? I love it. I'm like, Yes, I am. Because we need to talk about these things. Because we've been sort of trapped in this old school way of thinking about fundraising and philanthropy. That's not serving us as fundraisers, that's not serving our donors. And there's actually a totally different way to do this, where we're embodied and empowered and connected and joyful. And so I launched my practice to support leaders who want to fundraise that way. And I've worked with over you know, I've worked with over 1000 fundraisers. In the last year in some capacity through my courses, I've coached 23 organizations, one on one, all of them see the same results when they take the step back, and they do this work. And I'm just so I'm so inspired by them every single day, and so grateful to call this my job.

Can you see why we think Mallory is a complete powerhouse, right?

I mean, she's fully in the fundraising is an art. That's what I love.

I know. And it's like you don't, you know, turn away the science aspect. But the art, the mindset, all of that is just threaded through your approach. And I just love that so much. Because we aren't just beings that just show up and fundraise and then go home. Like we're complex people. And we're trying to overcome our own fears, in our roles and our jobs in a changing landscape. And so I love that you just lead us through that and can't wait to dive into some of your hacks today. Let's start by getting into mindset if you're okay with that, first, will you talk us through, you know, what are some of the ways that you coach your clients through your your coaching, or your one on one practice? Of how do you get in the right mindset to be a more effective fundraiser?

So, you know, it's so interesting, because I feel like when we say the word mindset, we maybe get that little like eye roll, because people are totally right. Like I even had someone on a podcast once sort of say like, but don't talk about mindset. And you know, people people have sort of heard enough about mindset. And I'm like, no, what they've heard enough of is think positive, feel positive, manifest your money, right? Like, that's, that's what we've heard enough of, because what that doesn't tell us is how to actually shift our mindset. Like, if you're feeling defeated as a fundraiser, if you're feeling overwhelmed, or burned out, and someone tells you to sink, think positive, you're like, what, like, you can't connect with that energy. Right? So the very first thing I'm doing with my clients around mindset is awareness. Like, where are you? How are you showing up? You know, I say a lot to my clients, like everyone is walking around this world with colored glasses on, right pink glasses or blue glasses. But we don't even know that we're wearing glasses, right? That we're seeing this world through perceptions and beliefs that we're holding, and we're deriving meaning and stories from all those things. And they are they are creating our entire experience as fundraisers. But until we know what color glasses we're wearing, we can't do any of the other work. Right? So that's my very first thing around mindset is all about awareness. How are you showing up? What's feeling sticky? What's feeling good? What you know, what, what are moments where you're in flow? Where are moments where you're feeling really stuck, I do a lot of value work with my clients, one on one, to really identify like, when things aren't feeling good, there's a reason things aren't feeling good, right? And it can be challenging to navigate that water, especially alone, you know, I have a lot of tools around like, what's the difference between fear or gut? So you know, people will tell me all the time, I was gonna reach out to this donor, but I just have this intuition that it was the wrong time. And I was like, well, is that intuition or was it fear? And they're always like, I don't know, they actually feel

like a therapist.

Well, there's all these really complicated emotions that are so totally normal. And we got to we have to start there because everything builds on that. I do not care if you have the shiniest, cleanest, most perfect CRM system, if you do not know what color glasses you are wearing, you are not showing up as your best fundraising self.

I love this conversation so much because it reminds me of the first time I ever watched and listened to Brene Brown's TED Talk, which is one of the most transformative speeches I've ever seen. And in what what she says is completely aligning with you, which is, why have we tamped down vulnerability for so long? Why have we not again, embrace the art of fundraising, we have kind of put that aside in a in a drawer, because we are kind of been preowned, and wired to know that we can that we need to be apolitical. We can't go into those emotional spaces. But what if that was our superpower? What if tapping into that changed everything? What if that elevated the game and we're seeing that over and over again, that if you can tap into again, that awareness mindset, if you can understand what glasses you're wearing, if you're willing and brave enough to open up that drawer and go there, I really think your mission is going to take off. So yes, basically, that was a really long winded way to say, Yes, I'm drinking your Kool Aid, keep going covered.

I'm covered in goosebumps, actually, as you were saying that because I think that is the fundraising, like the fundraising superpower is vulnerability and authenticity, right. And so people say all the time, like with mindset stuff, and what I find with almost every single person I work with, I actually don't think I can think of a single person that's hasn't come up. It's like perfectionism, right? And so it's like, we are all so familiar with perfectionism, right? Anyone who's been in the nonprofit sector work their way up your is a fundraiser. But here's the thing. Perfectionism is dangerous for so many reasons. It's dangerous, because it paralyzes us, it's dangerous, because, you know, keeps us in a state of of sort of, like inaction and hyper analysis and, you know, focusing on the wrong things. But the reason why it's so dangerous in fundraising, is because it's in direct conflict with the most important superpower, which is authenticity. And because perfectionism, perfection is an illusion, you cannot be authentic and perfect, it is impossible. So that's your choice, you can easily either be an authentic fundraiser, or a perfect fundraiser, you'll never actually be perfect, that's not real. And I need you to be authentic. So I need you to make that choice every single day.

We just got permission to not be perfect.

Thank you know, we talk about this, too, is that donors are savvy enough, if it's this perfect exoskeleton, they're gonna think What's up, you know, you've got to have vulnerability, and people want to see that to understand the needs and understand where the gaps are. But you can't just paint a perfect picture of everything all the time.

If you go to Amazon, and something has five stars and 100, you know, five star rating, you know, and no negative reviews. I mean, your little bells go off. And it's like, something is not right here. Some it nothing can be this perfect. So I think that's a great suggestion.

You know, I had a donor tell me once, that are like, asked me about mistakes I had made. And he was like, I want to hear about your worst mistakes. And I was like, okay, and I started to talk to him about some of the things and and I just said to him, I said, Can I just ask like, why are you asking me this? Like, what are you like, what do you want it? What do you really waiting to hear? And he was like, I just want to make sure you've made enough mistakes before I invest in you. Because I don't want to pay for them. So I want to see how good your mistakes have been. I want to know that you have fallen flat and gotten up. I want to see under the cover, because that tells me a lot about where you are today. And I was like, wow. Okay, even another reason to just like be more honest and open and transparent with our funders.

We're going to need his name and phone number because we would like to have him on the podcast later on.

Okay, awesome. Let's dive in to goal setting. This is one of your superpowers too. I'd love to hear your take on how we can leverage that to transform fundraising.

Yeah, so I was thinking about this before we got on the call, like, what do I what do I want people to really think of when they're goal setting for 2021? And I'll tell you to, to the way that I think about goal setting and fundraising is I set a conservative budget goal and an audacious fundraising goal. So I always want my budget goal to be aligned with spending right and the last thing I ever want as a fundraiser or someone who's sort of signing off on someone's fundraising budget for it to be overinflated, particularly right now right when there is a lot of economic uncertainty when donor you know funder priorities are shifting In response to COVID, right, there's just a lot of real stuff going on. So, you know, I always recommend that that side of things remains, you know, responsibly conservative. But I also always set a different fundraising goal. And that is my that is the goal that I work with my clients around. Right. So that's our Northstar. That's the number that we're driving towards. And it's audacious, always. And what I see happen with clients around that is that, you know, they forget the budget goal eventually, because that's really just for the sort of operating side of things. So their North Star is this audacious fundraising goal. And no matter where we land, we are we max out our fundraising capacity by have and I don't mean time, right? I mean, in our capacity by setting that audacious fundraising goal, and the reason I watch organizations not want to do that, like where I see a lot of resistance around setting big goals like that, is that they're afraid they won't get it. Right. They might not hit it. And again,

I hear fear, not gut, I'm with you.

Exactly. So it's like, okay, so if so, if the only risk, if the only risk to setting that audacious goal is that you might feel bad for a second, can we handle it? Can we just like, can we just commit to ourselves that, like, we're going to stand up for ourselves, we're going to have our own back, we're gonna just make it okay, but we're gonna know that are trying to get there is the best possible path forward, and then just manage if we don't reach it, which is okay. You know, and so I think I think about goal setting really differently. I think people you know, I I'm all about smart goals when it comes to like weekly, deliverables, monthly deliverables, and things like that. But I really believe in an audacious Northstar. Because the way your mind works, when you're thinking big, the creativity you have around fundraising, the guts you muster are always better.

Okay, I love that. And I'm also thinking of Casey Casten, reaching for the moon, you're gonna land somewhere among the stars, right?

Oh, my gosh, where's the where's the dad joke.

But it's just so good. I mean, I think we're very much the same way in how we approach goals, but why not, you know, we keep talking about this with abundance, our missions absolutely demand us to dream big. And we need to be in that space. Because we limit our own donors in that capacity to we limit what we think people are possible, because we don't even float it, you know, we don't even put it out there. And so I love that you're challenging your clients, and to lean into that, because we're our own worst enemy at that, you know, it shouldn't be a goal that, you know, you can hop over who is engaged by that anyway, you know, it's, it needs to have something that makes you a little uncomfortable.

And I have to tell you, if I'm a board member of an organization, who tells me at the on the front end, look, we're gonna have a crazy goal. And this is not something that we want you to hold our feet to the fire and say, you know, that there's going to be punitive damages, or shame or whatever associated with that. We just need your support, and we need you to have our backs because we're going to go for it. There is no board member in history, that is gonna say, No, I'm not okay with that, like, they're going to say you go for it, we are going to give you the, the launchpad to be able to go and do that. And if you get it, what a celebration that is. And I can just think that if you're someone who's letting go of this perfectionism, it's okay, you know, it's okay to kind of reach for that. So that's a really good tip there. So our third tip that you want to dive into is power partner focus. Right, and I love what you're talking about, because Mallory has had a power partner class that just seems so game changing. And I love how you are bringing this to the community. So go for it.

Yeah, so I have spent years thinking about what the difference is between those fundraising meetings that feel like life changing, you know, the ones we've all sat down, and we've been there for three hours. And it's like, where did the time go? And there's so much connection. And I mean, gosh, I have had I had major donors at my wedding. You know, like, they're like, I did, you know, and, um, and so it's like, we all know the difference between those, and the meetings that just feel like, oh, I don't even know the words, right. They're just like their state. I call them sticky, right? Like it kind of feels like you're bumping into a bunch of stuff and it didn't really feel good. And you're probably sitting down at that meeting because somebody made an introduction and that person's doing a favor for you. You know, for their friend, right? And so the difference between those things is power partners, not power partners. And that all comes down to alignment, right. So what I really focus on with my clients, and what I'm coming out with in 2021, is this power partner formula, which is basically like what I've been doing one on one with my clients, I've turned it into a self guided course to help people move through my entire process of how do you identify from the get go, that somebody is a power partner? And then how do you reach out to them recognizing that Power Partnership, you know, so often, I think we were talking about this the other day, when we're sending like engagement emails, or asking someone to meet with us, we really make it all about us. And we are like, you know, we were we have my pink glasses on. And I'm doing this cool thing over here. And I'm going to tell you all about that cool thing, and how you should care about that cool thing, the way that I care about that cool thing, because you should just care about it the same way that I do, right? And so you should want to fund it right? And we don't ever take a step back and be like, Okay, so this is a that power partners want the same end goal, but potentially for different reasons. So not only do we learn to identify who they are, identify their underlying, sort of, I don't want the word motives doesn't have the best connotation to me, but inspiration, right, they're like, underlying inspiration for the outcomes that you want. And then we learn how to connect with them based on those based on, you know, that inspiration and build a partnership around that. So you know, I say I say like I sort of gave you the example of the email that I see most people sending, right, which is like, you know, Hi, I'm, you know, the executive director of data, we do blah, blah, blah, we are having this event, you know about data that it up, we'd love to invite you to sponsor, let me know when you can talk about it, right? That's sort of like the typical email, a power partner email sounds really different. Right? So a power partner email sounds a lot more like this, like, Hey, Annie, I just saw that over at, you know, insert company, you guys launched an initiative focused on data, data data, I am so inspired by blanks commitment to blank. And I really think that over here at insert my nonprofit, there could be some cool strategic partnership opportunities to elevate your mission. We focus on D to D to D. And it's really clear that we both care about blank, I would love to have a quick conversation about this. Do you have 20 minutes to get on the phone next week? Right? Something like that. So what you I just ran through that really quickly? That's not actually the template you get inside power partners. It's a little bit more robust do today is not in there. But what I the point of that is what you can tell in the difference there is that the second email, the power partner, email is all about the power partner. There's

like, I noticed that your example is like Oui oui, oui, oui, oui, oui. But it's more about the person, the other person.

Yeah, it's like, here's what I see in what your company is trying to do. And I love it. And I love it, because we're trying to do something similar over here. And I want to see how powerful we could be together in achieving blank. Right? So it's like, what a different feel how different someone is going to show up to that meeting than they would if it's like, Hey, we're having this event. We are looking for corporate sponsors. Would you be willing to have a conversation about sponsoring our event for $5,000? Like, which meeting Do you want to go to?

This is exactly what I remember Bridgette Zorn, we had her on, you know, back in season one, and she's talking about how you align your values, you know, with your donors, whether that's a corporate donor or an individual a foundation. I mean, there's a much different approach to saying I think we have alignment and what we believe and the things that we value. If you're interested in learning more about it, let's have a conversation. And to me, there is no hint of solicitation in that it's it's definitely about partnership. What you've just said is so groundbreaking. I hope everybody took notes right there because that was a really, really good tip. Okay, so we're moving into Tip number four, which is shifting the culture of our organizations and not fearing the inevitable knows, I can't wait for you to dive into this. Go for it.

So, okay, so we got this relates to like everything that we've talked about, basically up to this point. So this relates to the mindset work, right, because one of the things one of the reasons why I realized that I wanted to work with fundraisers is because I actually started coaching like women, and just doing sort of like more General like life career coaching. And what I found was like sort of what you were saying around Brene? Brown, right? Like, how does vulnerability trigger all of this, all of our stuff, right. And so what I realized in doing that, at the same time as I was, you know, fundraising is wow, like, fundraising triggers all of our stuff, because it's vulnerable. And I work with a lot of clients, honestly, who are like, I feel like I've worked through a lot of my self worth stuff, but here it comes rearing its ugly head around fundraising, and I can't, I can't break the cycle. Now, again, you know, like I did before, and my, you know, whatever component of my life. And so, you know, there's this culture in nonprofits. And I think part of this is, you know, because of the stigma we honestly deal with in nonprofits where we are, we many of us have dealt with people sort of questioning the efficiency of our organizations or questioning our competence as professionals. And so we launch ourselves out on the defense, right, like with the perfectionism, you know, and then we A, we internalize it into our organizational culture, too. And what that does is it doesn't create space for people to to deal with rejection safely. And fundraising is inherently involves rejection. So you've now created this environment that's unsafe for your fundraisers. And so what that means is, they're never going to push a boundary, and they're leaving money on the table. You know, I tell my clients all the time, I do not care how many yeses you you got this month, that number means nothing to me, tell me how many noes you got. And inside power partners, I actually have a no challenge. Because I want people to get comfortable hearing no, because the only way the only way to move through that, particularly if you have a culture that isn't allowing you to sort of talk about these things or talk about the discomfort or talk about the vulnerability is, is to survive it. Right. Like with all of these things that bring up our deepest self critics or defy our deepest Gremlins, I said to a client the other day I said, I said, you know, I don't know. I don't want to, like overstep here, but like what you're kind of describing to me sounds like you feel like you might die. Like if that like that, like the level of stress feel over that meeting. And she was like, that is how I feel like, it's not like, I think I'm gonna die. But it feels like that, right? So it's like, these are the fears that the level of fear that people hold walking into these donor meetings, like they are just walking off the ledge into a dark abyss, right? And I said to her, I said she was like, that's how I feel every time I'm, you know, going into a donor meeting, because I don't know what they're going to say. And so I said to her, I said, Okay, so what if I told you, Alice, that next year, you were going to have 104 donor meetings? And 56 of those people were going to say no, and the rest of them, were going to say yes. How would that feel? Like how would that feel different? And she was like, Oh, my God, it would feel completely different. And so what I realized is that it's actually not the know that people are afraid of, it's the story that they caused the know. Right? It's the, it's the fear that something they did caused the know. And so that's perfectionism, right? That's insecurity, that's our Gremlin. That's our self critic, all those things, which so many of us, myself included, know so well. Right. So okay, so that means that you are not in an in a culture, you haven't created an organizational culture that creates safety and expectation around the No. Right that like, that's just a part of what this is. And so when I think about, you know, how do you change, you know, organizational culture within fundraising teams, you know, one track and celebrate those knows, that means that your fundraisers are pushing their limits, if they have 100% yeses, they are doing something wrong. Like that is the worst sign to me. They're doing something wrong and

probably asking too low if they're getting all of those out of those yeses.

Absolutely. Right. They're leaving money on the table, like what you were saying before, like when we under, you know, when we undershoot with our donors, when our goals are too small, then we make our donor goals too small. And all of that is built on fear of the know or the Yes, but or whatever. And the reason we're really afraid of those things, is because we're afraid of the stories that accompany those things. You know, people say no to me all the time, but I don't attribute anything to that. And what I say when a donor says no to me, my choice Through feeling. And what I say is, I really hope you find an organization that you feel inspired and enlivened by. And that's what I really hope for them. Like, if it's not my organization, no problem. Like, I hope they really find what is meaningful to them. And I really feel that way. And I say that to them. And so it's like, they're no isn't personal. But it's so easy for us to go right into those stories of that donor didn't like me, I said something wrong. I asked too early. Like, I think the whole like waiting 12 to 18 months around a major donor thing is a total farce. I think the only reason we heard you that. Are you ready? Yes. I think the only reason we do that is because if a donor is still meeting with us, after 12 months of meetings that don't involve an ask, we have finally convinced ourselves that they're gonna say, Yes, I think that's it. I think that's the whole thing. We've built an entire culture around this weight to satisfy our fear of them saying now,

why just feel like this is a masterclass and everything that you taught in fundraising, could possibly not be me, not everything be wrong. Because the power q imagine the shift in a culture, if your executive director came to you and said, You got to know. And that Bravo, Q imagine the shift of I saw you push yourself on this one, I saw how hard you cultivated this donor, I saw that, you know, it just wasn't in the cards. And we get that I mean, the whole time you've been talking, I go back in my mind to the time where we're setting budgets, as a major gift officer and saying for the year, I think, you know, with this donor, I think this could be a high level, you know, this is the high of what they could give this could be the low of what they get. But it's like, that is not what could actually happen. You know, it could be zero, our low could be a zero from that person. But how freeing to know that we're not going to waste our time on people who don't align with our values and with our mission, into knowing that our leaders have our back to know that that is a function of what we do, we're not going to take that inside of us and let it just stew and cripple us. We're going to use it as a part of our armor to go out and find the people that do align with us. And then we're gonna get yeses there, and they'll feel just as good. So I think you are blowing just everything up in my mind about what what is possible, and how we look at how we engage. Jon's rubbing his head like

No, like I'm having this moment. I'm like, doesn't want to have a resilient team after 2020. It's got to be what we all lean into, you know, and those that were comfortable with nose probably came out so much farther ahead. For what the year throughout us. Right. And so I love that you are preaching this I love I think to have a great guest, Lindsey Simon's we had on episode 50. That she said, you're also not going to get as many noes because the steps of getting to know a donor and what they value. You're probably not going to get a hard No, I mean, like a hard hard. No is so rare compared to Yes, but or yes, maybe not that much, or labor right now. Yeah. And it's just like how much fear Do we wrap in something that if you do all the things like you're not even going to be faced with it as much and it's, it's okay, I love the permission you given the donor, say, I want you to find that place. That's what we preach in a space is that philanthropy gives us that opportunity to find what we connect with. And of course, we're proud of that, if it's our organization, that's great, but we're on the donor side. I mean, that's donor centered fundraising.

And the mental health of this, I think is also something that we could not gosh, we need to like, just sit on for a second. Because if if you don't feel burdened, if you don't feel the responsibility that's weighing you down, have I have failed in this, it may have absolutely nothing to do with you. And if we can just let that go Think of how much more vibrant and empowered we would feel. As professionals, I think that this has all the underpinnings of being a really progressive thought in our industry. So just

carrying that banner, we're just here for Mallory

right now. No,

totally like everything you guys are saying. It's just like so so aligned. And I think that's the difference also between, like power partner, and you know, and not like when we think about because you think about the whole trajectory about getting in front of someone or like asking your board right to like, make introductions for you, right? It's like you're constantly banging your head against the wall, like open your Rolodex to high net worth individuals, right. That's the wrong ask. Like, because because that's first of all, that alone is not a match, like having money to give away and your organization. That's not the criteria. Maybe Maybe it's the criteria for one time gift as a paddle pledge and an event sitting with your board member, but that's not a power partner. That's a guilt gift. And that's and that's why it doesn't feel good. That's why it doesn't feel good, right. And that's why the board member hated making the introduction. And that's why the meeting was sticky and all these things. And so even with board members, like my power partners think has a like, after you identify and power partnership with someone in your boards network, that's when you make a very specific ask to your board member using that same formula, because then it's not about their friendship, right. Like, that's when philanthropy and fundraising I think, and I have had these experience too, with family members and friends, like, you know, earlier in my fundraising days, so I get it. But it doesn't have to be that way. And I think it's just based on kind of these old school principles of how we build our pipelines and, and how we get in front of the right people

in this ethos of what you are throwing down here. To me, the thing that I keep thinking over and over is, it creates harmony for everybody. And the donor feels good, the gift officer feels good, the executive director feels good, the volunteer and the board member feels good. And when you are writing those kinds of feelings, what is the end result, everybody wants to pour into the mission more, they want it, they want to replicate that feeling again, and again. And again, and we're not getting caught up in the shoulda, woulda, coulda does. And we're starting to like, just look forward. And the other thing I just want to say is, I feel that you're saying that and I don't want people to get lost in the semantics of power partners that we're just talking about millionaires here, a power partner, to me could be a young professional, who is passionate about your cause. They could be somebody who could have a very, you know, sort of an influence or voice in the social media space and how you show up with them. And how you talk to them is also I mean, I think they could be a power partner. So I think looking at that, broadly is also a really good tip. Yeah, I

love that you said that. And that's why I say like, $5 to $500,000 donors, because yeah, you'd need to talk like, the idea is that you're surrounded by these people, because that makes your entire fundraising experience your entire, you know, organization feel really different. And I just I want to say one other thing about the culture piece, is that okay, if I just go back to that, because

you got your megaphone, you you say what you need to say into that megaphone?

No, I just, you know, I hear a lot of times from people when they hear me talk, like, wow, that is so different from how I feel, you know, like, the way you talk about philanthropy is soda and asking for money, or, you know, making an offering to people is so different from how I feel every day in my fundraising. And so there's two things around the the one thing around the culture and then one other thing I just want to say around it, you know, one is that you create a culture, whether it's just you and one other person, you know, or you and a friend works for a different organization, whatever it is, where you can just talk about when things don't feel good. Like sometimes you just need to let it go, right. Like, I sent this donor an email four days ago, I thought it went really well, I felt the meeting went really well. And I'm not hearing back and I'm starting to spiral. Like when we suppress those feelings, they don't go anywhere. So we just got to get them out. And we need to know that like, it's really normal to have those feelings. I still, even all the work I've done, sometimes I will, I'll hear crickets for a retainer contract. I'm like, wait a second, like I thought, what and I and I watched them start the story start, right. And then I have the tools and tricks to intercept them and change them. But just to know that that, that those patterns, those thought patterns are totally, totally normal. So I don't need to get off this podcast and start beating yourself up for the thought patterns that you're having. Right? That's sort of the opposite. And then the way to change those and shift those is a practice. You know, like I say that I compare it to weightlifting all the time, right? Like, you're not going to start lifting the 200 pound weight, you're gonna start lifting the 10 pound weight, you know, talking yourself through rejection that maybe didn't feel as you know, the stakes were as high right? You're going to work, you're going to work that up and work that up and work that up. And you're always going to be practicing. And some days you're going to PR and you're going to watch yourself feel good even after a big no, you know, or yes, but and other days, you're not going to be able to lift the weight you lifted the day before. And that's okay. These these things are these are muscle building strategies. And they are often in conflict with so much of what our culture is teaching us to believe and think about ourselves and about our organization. And so just have some patience. with yourself and compassion with yourself, if you're in the thick of trying to show up differently,

so can we transition to a story malar you get to work with, you've worked with 1000s of people, obviously. So what's a story about a moment in philanthropy can be back when you were on the front lines at a nonprofit, something that just really moved you about the power of this space that we get to live in, in philanthropy.

You know, this is kind of a recent one, but I was on a donor call with one of my clients. And you know, so in the middle of 2020, with this family foundation that had historically given I think, around $2,500, to this organization, but they but they had, you know, they have a lot of capacity. And we could see that they were giving bigger gifts to other organizations. And so we, you know, we had this really beautiful call, just talking about, you know, everything that was going on a really honest, really transparent call about the challenges the organization was facing, but the opportunity before them and, and sort of financial sustainability. And this donor, what she really wanted to hear about work was how the constituents were being consulted in how the organization was addressing the challenges in front of them, and the way that they were being sort of incorporated into the decision making process of the organization. And I think, you know, we're seeing a lot more of this as community centric fundraising is becoming, you know, a more sort of embraced topic, and we start to think about, you know, decolonizing, philanthropy and giving as well. And for me, it was this was in a community where I really didn't think those principles were maybe so widely known, and just watching this woman, like, really be willing to sit in some very uncomfortable conversations, and asking for them, in order to figure out how she could make the biggest impact and honestly addressing I can't talk about too many of the details, but like, addressing some of the ways that maybe her money, hadn't been supporting the people she was trying to support as she intended. I was just, I was so moved. I mean, that's probably not the most like inspiring story you've ever heard. But for me, it was, I think, exactly like what you're talking about Becky and Becky that like there is this reckoning, right? Like, there is this moment where like we are all being asked to take a giant step back and look at ourselves, look at our organizations, look at the way we operate, look at the way money moves, and we are being challenged to find a better way. And so for me, it was just such a good reminder that the donors are on this journey with us, and we're all going to stumble a bit, and we're all going to, you know, figure it out and not figure it out and, and fail and be imperfect. And you know, it's all about imperfect action for all of us. But we're partners. So that that's mine.

That's such a good story. It's even just the simplicity of it. I mean, if there was a theme to this entire conversation, I would think it would be it's okay to sit in the discomfort a little bit, because that's where we learn. And that's where again, we're we are flexing those muscles and getting stronger. And we're going to see a new narrative play out in philanthropy. And I'm so excited about it, because I just think that it's a gift to be able to look at something with fresh eyes, and to try out something new, indifferent. And I just really believe that if you are a wholehearted individual who wants to do good, who wants to perpetuate, you know, your mission in a way that's comfortable and inspiring. There are a lot of things that we have not employed that we're about to see this year.

Yeah. You know, it's interesting, like when you're like Mallory sort of, you know, shepherding us and like my immediate visual, when you were talking before was like this idea of like, take my hand and take you take my hand to, you know, like you guys are like we are walking through this together all of us. And we're just trying to figure out how to make this world a better place. And we've been doing the best we could up to this point too. And but like, all of the knowledge, all the training that you guys are bringing to people and supporting people with to think differently a place they can always land, you know, where they're gonna keep hearing these messages and this mission, I just think I'm just so grateful that you guys are in this space.

Just like 2021 is the year of the professional of the power power fundraiser coming out in a new way. I mean, I'm just seeing like Superman, like rip open a shirt and there's the cape. It's like, this is our coming out party and we want to equip you to be one of those forward thinkers that is absolutely going to change the landscape of Have your nonprofit and we hope it's going to change you too. So

and to do it in community, you know, with like minded people that that's what makes us feel better. It feels better. Okay, we ask every one of our guests one good thing. And Mallory, you've given us so many. But what is something that everybody could implement today? What's a mindset hack? Tip trick?

This is sort of an overarching trick that I use for everything right? So we've talked a lot about the stories that come up, right, this thing happens. And we immediately because of our glass color, create a story around it. What one of the tricks I'm constantly employing, when I watched myself do that is pull the data, right. So I have I have a little sign of not in my office right now behind my desk that says, Do you have the data to support that belief. And so you know, it can be so easy for us to attach to something and believe with all of our minds that it's true. And but we've pulled it from a deep belief we're holding about ourselves, not the data that surrounds the circumstance, right? So like, when that donor doesn't respond to you, in four days, you have created a story about them not liking you, or you upsetting them. But that's not based on data. Right? And so just constantly challenging yourself when you're feeling you don't have people track like, okay, all emotions are related to a thought or belief that you you held right. People are like, Oh, no, fundraising stressful. No, fundraising is not stressful, fundraising is just fundraising. What is stressful are the beliefs and thoughts that you have about fundraising. I'm not good enough at fundraising. I didn't hit my goals last year. So I won't hit my goals this year, that it was really awkward at my last donor meeting. So this one's going to be awkward to those thoughts. That's what's stressful, right? So you need to tap into the emotions that are coming up the discomfort that's coming up, right, this is how you sit in the discomfort, look at the discomfort that's coming up, track it to the thought that's leading to that discomfort and pull the data is the data true. And if it's not, what's a different thought, that's my sort of like number one go to process that my brain is going through 1000s of times a day to keep me out of feeling uncomfortable.

I want you to tell everybody how to connect with you. And you know, you've kind of teased it on this episode, you have got an incredible, really immersive class that you've put together called Power partners. So I'd love for you to talk about that as well. And just give us all the ways to connect with you because there's just so much good that you're sharing with the world and the community.

Awesome. Thank you. Well, yes, so you can find me at Mallory underscore Erickson underscore coach on Instagram. That's sort of the social media platform I show up in the most with free tips and tricks. So you can find me there. My website is Mallory erickson.com, as well. And then yes, I have created as I've mentioned a few times the power partners formula. And this is based on years of doing the power partner system, one on one with clients. But I've created a self guided course that folks can walk themselves through step by step by step around identifying the right power partners, knowing exactly how to engage them, how to prep for the meetings that you're having with them, where it's whether it's the first or the fourth meeting, and then how to actually make the ask through my simple yes system. And I do it you have everything you need for foundations, corporate partners, and individuals, I kind of can't believe how much I'm putting in one thing. But I really wanted to give everyone the tools that they need to just go the content is in little bite sized chunks. It's all around like I say you're gonna raise more in 10 weeks or less with this program. And I guarantee it actually, so they can learn more about that by coming to by watching my webinar, which which you were saying Becky before, right is how to raise more from the right donors without hounding people for money. And so you'll learn all share a ton on there. So you'll get to see inside power partners, I'll give you a lot of free tricks and tips. And then I'll also invite you to join if you want to join us inside the formula inside the community that I'm building.

Oh my gosh, I always love when Mallory comes in our house and friends listening. I hope you found today's episode helpful. But here's the thing, we want you to get activated not just hear the things but we want to help you walk out the door feeling confident about what to do next.

Because we know that there is a different way to fundraise that feels so much better. So if you're ready to stop chasing down donors, to stop having sleepless nights worrying about where the next funding is going to come from, and to stop hounding people for money. Learn more about Mel's power partners formula at we are for good.com backslash power partners, and be sure to attend her free webinar on August 17 Thanks so much for being here y'all