But it goes already nine o'clock there. So they're kind of like off the clock. So we'll see. Anyway, Hi, everybody, thanks for joining, we are hard at work on all kinds of interesting and substantial pieces over here on our end, why don't we just do a quick check in whatever you're checking in with, and we'll dive in today, we're gonna look upstream. And really work on that, and noodle on that. And, and also, we thought just to make it possible for people to get to know each other a little bit. So we have some ideas about today. But before we dive in, let's let's just hear from you and what you bring to the call.
I'm happy to dive in, and someone's jump jumping in there. I am bringing I've just got off the phone with someone who is completely reminded me that I need to stop making assumptions. And going down this pathway of it just the habit loop of thinking, you know, everything's terrible, and instead does not doing that. You know, and this phone call, just dismissed all of these assumptions that I've had about how that relationship is. And I feel great. I feel liberty. So once Yeah, I realized, wow, I just really need to stop making assumptions on how people are thinking about me and the situation and everything.
So thanks, Karen. Yeah.
I can follow that. Just spent in a night, nine days in Hawaii, with my sons and my partner, and man watching 18 and 20 year olds worry in Hawaii was just bizarre. And just really, you know, they don't get that from me. It made me really reflect on how how much how strong the imagination is, when we're not conscious of it, and how it can be put to use to undermine us. And so I'm really thinking a lot about how to help my sons take hold of their imagination in a fruitful way.
Wow, I'll pick up there because yeah, I couldn't agree with that more. I certainly haven't mastered that. But I would say I'm coming in with the last almost 24 hours, I can't quite figure out when it started. For sure. It was happening last night. As I was trying to sleep rest. I've been feeling this very peculiar energy. And I don't normally say things like this. And then I had a conversation with somebody earlier today, who's I'd say, like one of my leading witch friends. And she led with, there's this really weird energy that I'm feeling and I was like, Whoa, and we were comparing notes on what was happening. And the best way I can describe it is I don't know if you've ever used one of those like, you see it with fruit salts, or some of those vitamin C dropping a glass and there's an effervescence, right? So I feel like there's an effervescence like layer throughout my skin and my teeth. In all my joints. I thought I'd like run a little bit too much or something but is too uncanny. And the way I The reason I pick up on that, Tim in relation to the imagination. Question is I feel like there's so much fear and anguish and suffering and sadness. And there's been a lot of deaths in like, near and far to me. And I'm like, not letting it in. I'm like, no, that those aren't my things I am I feel great. Actually. It's I'm sad that they're suffering, but it's not my suffering. And it feels like there's these
I don't know this
really bizarre energy. So I'm in a kind of heightened state. My shields are up. But my courage feels like extra drawn on or something in my imagination. I'm like, harnessing it. I'm like, that's why I have it and that's going to be my strongest tool for the next while until whatever this is.
passes. That's why I'm coming in with
eating some berries.
Wow.
Reserve su laureline not necessarily in that order.
Laura Lee Yeah.
Now I'm thinking about energies. But yeah, I mean, this week was also a lot about how much what we like how much thoughts create reality. So it's, it's along the same lines, like whatever you feel is can thing can influence how you feel and how you are in the world and like, what to generate the people around you. And it's an it's trends, I mean that times where it's feels like a concepts and like yeah, of course, whatever you bring out, you know, it's gonna influence the type of world you're in. But sometimes it really feels like extremely visible or extremely clear. And so this week was also a bit like this, like, okay, I can actually generate a vibe or I can generate an atmosphere, and then things are going to flow in a very different way than if I saw it differently, and then behave differently. But it's less conscious than that. It's less strategic than that. It's just really about how I like assault that gives the feeling and that creates them, like the positive things happening around. So.
Cool, thanks.
I have been really good and strong twice. But yesterday, very close friend died suddenly. And I was pretty shaken yesterday. But I finally got to a place last night of sort of welcoming her in into her new space. And this is imaginative I, because I have no idea what that's like, but, but being able to feel her present with me. And so the sense of loss domain diminished. I still have a sense of loss. But But I remember saying early in the day after I found out, she'll be there to welcome me. And that was a really nice, a nice thing to carry through the day. So I'm not in Lorraine's place of being able to completely fend it off. Because it's very personal. But I am using my imagination to lighten the load, so to speak. And it's very, very, very helpful. And I was really looking forward to the call today.
Thanks, Sue.
Yeah,
my chicken is started the day off really terrible. I was defeated by computer woes last night very late. But this morning, I emerged triumphant but haggard.
So I'm feeling a lot better because I
solved my technical issues. But my goodness, it was, it was terrible for a while there. But I'm happy to see you all. So that that is definitely
feels really good.
That's me.
Thanks, Louisa.
I'm surprised and moved by the checkins everyone. My check in is
that I, I,
I sort of weave in and out of
sort of, full on assault mode of being being just full on assaulted in a spiritual realm to finding some stability, and peace and calm and everyday it's, it's you know, go through these, these these storms. And I've learned over the years to put them in perspective and to talk about them and, and to realize that it's not personal and that and what to do. And so you know, a lot of the stuff that that Louisa and I talk about and share with each other and if put into world maker and have have learned from our mentor is kind of the spiritual survival skills for a time of craziness and a culture of craziness. And we're trying to, you know, I think one of the values of these causes is hearing from you how you navigate your own experience with with similar storms or, or trials, or challenges are those of your sons or daughters. Yeah, so I'm very much appreciative of kind of this personal but also trans personal or interpersonal space.
Yeah, and I guess I'll say that as we, as we move forward, it's just very helpful for us magenta to have your participation, your support your ideas, your your sharing. Because when when you share what's happening for you, those are, for me, at least, you know, points of bridging what can otherwise be somewhat isolating, and even suffocating at times. You know, I think with the pandemic and the death and not just from the pandemic, but also unexpected death, we or death, death, it's not linked to COVID and can't be linked to COVID are not even necessarily linked to vaccines, but just whatever it is, we're going through, it's, it's, it's intense. So I have been thinking about this not as a thing that will pass, but as a, as a thing that will pass but leave its traces, you know, it will leave its mark in society and the collective psyche in humanity. So I think it's really good timing to talk about what we're going to talk about today. So let me just dive in, I prepared a little bit of a presentation. And as usual, I, I just want to drop in some thoughts. And I thought we might do some breakout rooms, which which we can do if we want to, I think that small intimate groups are cool to get to know each other. We can also just, you know, open up the sharing here, because we're a relatively small group. So whatever seems right. So what we're going to do today is
we're gonna we're gonna focus on this idea of looking upstream. And in the course, you know, we've talked about the habit loop. And in the first time you really look at the habit loop. we've, we've pared it down to be relatively simple, which is okay, I see myself in these inner habits, like I see myself thinking or feeling or doing things that bind me, and which I need to interrogate in question. And as you know, that runs all over the spectrum of the map. Lots of people have lots of different things, but they tend to kind of be repetitive things that we often do. And binding meaning they we have a feeling of constriction or like unhelpfully repeating ourselves, or we continue to find ourselves in this spine to the situation. And so we start to see the pattern. And we've contrasted that with Okay, well, when when we can learn to see ourselves doing that in some way, some form in our inner life or with others around us, we, we can we can pause, that tape and bring bring more presence and attentiveness to our inner state or our relating with others or into that habit loop into that binding repeating pattern. And at that point, we find ourselves in this sort of space between these arcs this this is what we've painted as this call this the creativity arc where we, we pause in this gap. And you can remember last time, we you know, we talked about negative capability, and we've talked about some of the, the trials of enduring that uncertainty, which can be really intense like these paintings. Is depict, or it can be just actually a moment of saying, Okay, well how do I get present and engage here in a generative loving, co creative way, instead of doing what I might otherwise normally if my thoughtlessly done. And a couple of weeks ago, we looked at this, this kind of lattice work. And you could, you know, you could put different things here, you could use different words, but there's basically kind of a path of saying, Okay, I see this, I'm going to interrupt it, I'm going to get present, which brings me into uncertainty. And I have to structure myself, our mentor used to call that turning the soul. So instead of my mind and soul going on autopilot, around the habit loop, so to speak, I'm gonna give it some structure, which almost feels like a calming of the tempestuous ocean, to be still and be present. And we talked about becoming receptive. And that's, that's really this question of the imagination that several of you mentioned, you know, what, the intuition, in in thought, that we can move towards, in our imagination, and our intuitive thinking is something that is both it's transparent to us. We are doing it we're present, we're active, we're participating, we're, it's not like a download that just comes in or drops in, it's kind of it can be, but it's also very presently received, where you're there, you know, you're present. And it has a character of wholesome or healing or a heart or some favorable turn. Right, some moment of realizing, okay, now I'm engaging in a way that can lead to a different outcome, I'm finding a way of being in this moment, that is not my habit, that helps establish more of a connection, or more warmth, or possibility, or more for fertility. And, and so this, this space of being structured in the not knowing, really is is the beginning of looking upstream, what we call in the course, looking upstream, which is, in the, in some of the old traditions, it's it's always a kind of,
there's picture of a receptacle, whether that's the womb, or the Grail, or the garden or the flower that will receive the pollinators, there's a kind of in the seven esoteric birds, which we may get into in the course, there's one of the birds is the dove, which rests in the branches of the tree in silent receptivity. And so there's these, there's a lot of images and you may have your own of this, this calm, open receptivity towards imagination towards pictures. And in a modern worldview, which we're going to talk about a lot more in the rest of Module Two, but but you'll know that from your experience, we tend to reduce or marginalize or ignore those or discount them, almost as if they're fantasies or if they're subjective, or if they're just ephemera. And not recognize, as as pretty much all indigenous and all ancient cultures did in some form or another, that those inspirations are, or can be real, and can be really helpful. And the last thing I'll say is that, of course, this calls for some discernment. Because one could practice fanciful thinking or wishful thinking or, you know, runs the gamut from stuff that you want to avoid and stuff that's questionable, like, you know, manifesting, like, Well, you know, think what you want and it'll be which is maybe true, I don't know. But Also then, also the the end of the spectrum that it's partnering or listening for the AHA or the piece of insight, that is wise and whole, and has a kind of innate potency to it. And in the older traditions, people talked about angels, or, and or ancestors, as being some of the beings in the spiritual world who are at that threshold, you may think about it in however you do. But the picture here is that it's possible to have an intuition or, or or something develop here in this negative space, that is really grounding and nutritive and, and a potent in your soul. You know, that really is powerful for you. That you can take in and you can, you can meditate on or you can think about, and you can hold that, right and go like, wow, this is, this is something that I am beholding or participating in, that can help renew or restore or balance my inner storms. So I thought to present them and just open up the conversation for how that resonates with you how you experienced that, how you're practicing it in your life right
now.
And, and we can get to know each other that way we can explore this terrain that way. And we can we can get your insights which help us just understand that and characterize that and, and build practices and disciplines around this potential and this capability. So let me stop there and open up the floor to your, your experiences, your questions, your practices. And, you know, we have about 30 minutes to talk about this. So welcome, your your thoughts.
Jeff, are we gonna try and do breakout rooms today? What are you thinking in terms of that?
I mean, I was thinking about it. Would that be a good thing to do y'all want to break out into a couple of little groups? Or do you want to keep it whole?
Kinda like the idea of staying together? Yeah. Oh,
yeah, we're a small enough group where it could work.
Yeah, I had planned on breakout groups, because I was hoping that the Rios Europeans would, would join us and we might have 15 people, but I think we can just stay home yesterday group.
Cool.
Can you just ask the question again, cuz I've already forgotten it.
Sorry.
I'm just opening up the floor for
your questions, you
might want to journal a little bit to kind of land some of the questions.
I think we're looking for the phenomenon at play here.
of going upstream,
yeah. Looking upstream, looking upstream, being receptive. And you know, I appreciated appreciate the tone of a very, it can be off, sometimes it can also just be very practical and very, you know, every day, so whatever, whatever comes to you is good. And we would love to hear it.
Just before when Laura Lane was sharing, she said, the thought becomes that it was some words there. It was like, Oh, that's what Dr. Joe dispenza is always saying the thought become the But anyway, was the way you said so but he has a very prescriptive text and I think that it's, it's being itself well in terms of, you know, seems to have a quite a lot of scientific methodology behind it. And I practice listening to those recordings and doing the meditations that he's doing. Don't fly halfway around ram around the world to attend to Dr. Joe dispenza. But I know friends that do, but um, you know, enjoying Some of those sessions and what I do find is that there is this increase of synergies that lead you to be in the right place in an angel style way, you know, you kind of like, well, other angels with me making this have like something is kind of occurring, because, you know, I'm intentional about that. So I think, for me, what what comes up is, if I'm looking upstream, you know, knowing that that sort of intervention seems to be happening when you're framing the, the imagination of what you want to occur, and then suddenly all someone calls you out, you know, all these things start happening. I think maybe the what I'm noticing is that if things aren't going well, for me, then what did I thread into my mental model and picture that is leading to that to be negative? Or, you know, what have I How have I woven those things in that that aren't, you know, as welcomed as that, you know, phone call or person that just appears in your life and seems to help carry you on towards the dream that you have. So there's just a few thoughts around intention and, and spirit noticing this spirit that seems to intervene?
No, I actually captured what Marlene said, Karen. She said, it's not so much a strategic intention. But the thought creates the feeling that creates how we relate to the world, the thoughts creates the feeling exactly what Dr. Joe,
do you listen to Dr. Joe? No, you don't. Okay. He says that the thought becomes the feeling. And by bringing into the body, those thoughts by bringing it makes it real. So that that's his theory of transformation, I guess. Thank you.
Yeah.
Can I Can I follow up on that? Yeah, so yeah, it's great. I mean, I'll check them. It's like something at experience. And just reflecting on what you said, Karen, you know, about this feeling that maybe you're bringing something like, when when things are not going the way you want, and you think that maybe you didn't bring something right somehow in the thinking of, I mean, I my own experiences that I used to think this way, because I hadn't noticed this kind of processes, I would say, and then I would be unhappy with myself and trying to find what I might have thought wrong or did. And then I also saw that maybe there's moments that don't really, that are not as easy as I would like them to be, I actually needed like that part of the process of learning, or there is something like that, because you really want like, because I've been in like, very heavy or like dark places at times, even lately, when I hoped I would be more supported somehow. But I always found that there was, there was a reason for that. Because it could be another extreme thing, like, Whatever happens to you is good for which I don't, I'm not fully sure of but like, there is sometimes something to learn through those moments. And I see that when I shift the mindset to, there may be something to learn through this, then it's less difficult to to live through it. And then it finishes faster. And then unless you know, bashing myself for whatever I might have done wrong. And so I guess the mindset is also I mean becomes more positive, faster, too. That's one, otherwise just on this receptive, I mean, being being receptive and going upstream. What I usually do is that what I've seen, what I've noticed myself doing more recently is that I don't finish I don't close the arguments was myself. Like in the past, there wasn't a situation and there wasn't, you know, whatever was happening, and then it would get into kind of like understanding mode and and they would come up with a theory of what happened. And then I would kind of say, Okay, this is what happened, this is the end result, and this is why I'm here. And then somehow they will be like Problem solved. And I'm moving to the next step. Now I would have been in a much more open ended state. So okay, this is what I'm understanding about what happen now, with whatever information I have or perception I have, but I don't need, I mean, this, this understanding can be improved or change data. And by keeping it open somehow, even though I'm not necessarily thinking about anything later, I get some kind of insights on on whatever situation and went through later on through sometimes very different situations. That helped me see what happened to me in a totally different light. And then, you know, things change, it's as if I can, I can follow like rewrite my past history, by not considering it as written. If it makes any sense, like it really like be rewritten because you accept the idea that you can actually rewrite it. So maybe you were wrong. Maybe there's something you misunderstood, and then you can rewrite it constantly. And it's crazy, because it can totally change your life. I mean, it's strange to say that, it feels like you can change the past by rewriting your history of the past and like real time, and that's why I had the feeling of them being receptive. And again, it's like nothing conscious, it's more an openness to having things being rewritten along the way, which find, which I find kind of crazy. And so I don't know, if it's looking upstream, but it's, there is no longer upstream or downstream. I mean, feels like things can flow in any direction. Like the movement is, I don't know if it's circular, or if there is no longer past or future. Because it can I mean, whatever you live in the present can change your past with somehow feels like it can change your future. So the time dimension of it, or like the upstream downstream dimension of it is no longer there. Yeah, sorry, that was a bit long. Trying to.
Yeah, that's really awesome that you say that, you know, that's like time travel. And in healing time trip, you know, time becomes way more fungible. Because yes, you are constantly rewriting your past, just in what you choose to believe about what happened to you. Because it's not the things that we live through. It's not the things themselves that that remain in our soul. It's how we internalize those experiences that remain in our soul. So we can totally rewrite our own history. And I think, yes, the future, you know, changes the future.
Well, can I this is very timely, Jeff and Risa. I certainly can't change anything about my friend's death. But I noticed once I sort of got over the shock, I noticed what I would call a habit loop of sort of staying in the sadness. And I sort of backed off from that and, and said, You know, I need I need to, I need not to just get stuck there. And, and waited. And I, you know, waited several hours and sort of thought through some things, and thought about how it happened, and my last interchange with her last weekend. And I don't know if this is what you mean by being structured in uncertainty, Jeff, but I just sort of stayed there. Without getting sunk in the sadness. I still felt sad, but not not stuck in it. So I was I was holding, and then I had a revelation that, I don't know this, but that she probably chose this. She probably chose this, this and this time, and, and there were some things that she said to me last weekend. That would make that make sense. And it it I don't know if I'm rewriting the past. I'm certainly rewriting the present. And I'm experiencing that death in a different way. I mean, she's entitled to her choices. And and it feels like the That was as soon as I had that thought, My whole being felt lighter. And it was it was like, wow, this this is like her choosing to move away or, I mean, you know, some other choice in her life. And I, I can accept that. I can, I can be there with that. I don't know what you say Marlene, I don't know if that's looking upstream. But it certainly changes me now. And as I look back at my history with her, I'm, I'm filled with gratitude, rather than sadness at the loss. And so it's changing. It's, it's changed, I don't know, what is changing roles, is changing something. So I think I was involved in that, in that, number four, or five and six in that. In that awareness, it feels fresh and different. And this is the first time I've articulated it, because I hadn't quite known how to think about it. But thinking about it like this is very comforting.
So cool.
Is that what is that what you were talking about?
Yeah, I mean, I think what Darlene was shared was absolutely spot on this phenomenon of not staying with one story or one history or one belief, but but I think what you described lurleen is a kind of not strategic, but indeed skilled or intuitive, openness to something peripheral, something new something else. And in weaving that together. In this intuitive way. That's what I'm, that's what I'm getting at. Yeah, that's what we're talking about. And it anytime we you know, think in terms of up or down or past or future, these things can get linear. So I appreciate the, the shift of perspective, I mean, center, periphery comes to mind, but these are all just images to kind of point to that experience of these possibilities for re re renewing. re being being new, beginning again.
And so that's so interesting what you say, because it's like, you experienced this release of possibility because you didn't go to the place of sadness. Because you intuited or felt that it wasn't good for you. And so you, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, there's something in that. I mean, it's quite understandable if you did go to the place of sadness. But somehow there was something in there. So what was that?
Well, I'm, I'm in the midst of writing the memoir. And, you know, I, there's, there's a lot of sadness in the in the story, but I don't want to stay stuck there. I want to, I want to move past that to the, to the healing part that the very the book is about. And so I, I sort of, it sort of felt like this was an opportunity, not just to change this situation, but to change a pattern that I have. And I you know, I hadn't really realized that that was a habit leap. I hadn't. I hadn't had a shock this this deep, or something that hurt that badly. And I just didn't feel like it was a good to stay there. Yeah. Yeah. And, and I didn't want to go to Houston for the celebration of life. In that place. I wanted to be able to celebrate. And, and be grateful. And I want that in my book as well. Right. And so it it feels like something has has shifted. In terms of my my, my perspective at least. And you know, like you said Laura Lena. As a I still don't know what direction I was going. But, but, um, I think the the, I would say that the insight has to come from upstream. Because it was an It was a brand new insight wasn't part of my worldview. It was it was from outside, you know, upstream from my worldview. And, and so, yeah, thank you for, you know, I hadn't known how to think through this, but but this is, this is what's happened.
I'd love to build on this. First of all, I just have to say, I'm so grateful for you, plural, like this is such a special space that I just feel extremely lucky with the universe put me here now. And I wanted to share something about the time flow piece, and then two really practical things that I found you, Louisa Jeff have given me that have helped with this seven step flow thing. So just on the time, I lived by a river, and I spent a lot of time running along the river. And I, I think a lot about which it just kind of there's no answer to the question, but which part of the river is the past? And which is the present? So is the water upstream flowing at me already done and moving towards the future? Or is it the future coming towards me and it will be past once it's flowed past me? And it's this kind of impossible question. Because the rivers like, what, like I'm just being a river. And you human are thinking about past and future, which is your deal that you made up. And it's very similar to spinning when I spin yarn, it's, it's funny to me how much the river is the same as yarn where you've got all this unspun fluff, it's has no integrity, it just kind of sits there, and then you put a twist in it, and it becomes yarn. And I sometimes when I'm spinning, I'm just puzzling. Is this full of potential unspun fiber the future? Or is it the past? Because when it goes to your fingers and becomes this urine, it's it already was, I don't know how to explain it, but there's constant transition from illness to wellness is like, anyway, it's an endless riddle. Um, so on a much simpler, more practical note, Jeff, I think it's one of your drawings, I forget which slide. It's in Module Two, for sure. Maybe the second maybe the first video, where when you talk about these seven steps. And I think it's when you say interrupt the pattern, you have a visual showing the little human, I'm noticing source, like the I think of it as that like Spark, so you don't have the very beginning of the course you suggested we print out and I don't have a printer. So I drew the two converging triangles with the noise on one side and the source on the other. And then that source light kind of re emerges beside the human who's noticing like, Oh, I'm interrupting the pattern. I'm enduring uncertainty, I'm structuring, on knowing that visual for me has been really, really powerful. When I like the shadow comes marching and Oh, look, you again, I'm noticing, I'm interrupting the pattern. And it's this, just being aware that that source exists, I have a very powerful. And then the second thing that's come to save me a bunch of times is Louisa you mentioning that needs are actually beautiful, that they're very elegant that they're because I think until like three weeks ago, I thought of means as problematic. And you know, these, these things we have to deal with, and then you've really helped me reorient around. Oh, they're wonderful. They're universal. They create love and beauty and they fulfill us and they're just these awesome things. And so holding that light or being aware that that light is there, even if I can't access it exactly in that moment when things are not so good. But knowing it's there allows me to structure some unknowingness and then being aware of needs and using, it becomes this beautiful thing. It's like alright, needs are beautiful. And it's just opened up some of the shuttered rooms in the house very powerfully. So
can I just can I just reflect that back to you. So what you said was the fact that then that you've discovered that needs are actually beautiful and true and good and unique. So has enabled you to feel structured and the unknowing to endure the unknown?
Yeah. Because until then I would be like, it's almost like a neediness. I mean, even the word needy has negative connotations, right? Oh, super needy. It's like, awesome, super needy, like, I'm trying to meet a need. And so I've it's helped me not get shut back into the habit loop, which has let me then interrupt the pattern, which is let me enjoy uncertainty. It's like allowed for that curve, the diagram that you just had up on the slide where the curve, you no breaks, and I was like, Oh, I can get into that other thing that's going to spiral somewhere else. very insightful. Well, thank you for handing it to me. discernment, I would say is the word that's lingering for me now. And that'll be, I think, a future exploration because that's a whole other
art form.
Thank you, Lorenzo.
Yeah,
that fits well into what I feel, is I'll try and share in a short time. I think that discernment for me has been a big piece of it having done this work for a while is to try and figure out whether the gap I'm experiencing is of the past of the present or of the future and where it lives in those and then I have different strategies for each. And for past work, I do tend to rely on my process coaching training, which is a lot of that kind of showing up in the old movie and rewriting it out of your higher self. That's language that makes sense for anything. And then for the presence work worked with an amazing woman from New Zealand called no lien who, who worked yourself through on medically unsalvageable, cancers and other injuries that the world have just given up on her and she's now just in service to the world completely hasn't worked for money in 20 years, it was like nine years old and is like hiking up mountains now.
New Zealanders man,
he's gonna go over to the US and we've had some amazing conversations and sit downs and her three step initial process is really, that like, listening to the resonance of everything I need now is here now. And that kind of both echoes that I have called everything that I'm experiencing into my life for a reason. But also everything I need to move out of this is also available to me. And that through experiencing and cultivating the capacity to send love to the situation to the experience then you can align yourself with your star or whatever that centered thread that you're that you're off center of. So that's the everything I need now is here now send love and align myself perfectly. And then for the future work I tend to rely on my will practice in connection with forest bathing, the Japanese concept of forest bathing, and really look at really living into my creative will as reading the fractal of my inner life in the outer world as an experience of creating a dialogue of what future is moving through me towards me and through and, and getting aligned with that. As practice when I'm not able to see why and where I am where I'm stuck. That's where I experienced probably the most inspirations
Whoa.
That's a lot of fruitful work your you're doing.
Yeah.
You know, one thing that has been that came up for me during the chickens. Well, first of all the synchronicity of all of your chickens like I imagined, we all sort of noticed that and then of course the synchronicity of the sharing and the theme of past present and future and time travel and it's way more fungible than we have been led to believe. But the other the other theme that I wanted to throw in here that is also very much present and already already spoke Except just in with different words. And that is what I call soul hygiene at something that I've been really focused on for quite some weeks. Partly because the animals require it as an absolute necessity. Like, for instance, this wild Mustang, get the ranch where my boss is, you can pretty much tell who's coming to the ranch before you can see their car, just based on her body language. Because in order for her to participate in a, in a relationship with me or anyone, you have to be the master of your inner realm. Your feelings, your thoughts, they you have to be disciplined. Otherwise, she's like her, get away from me. You're You're just a mix. You're
You're a toxic
presence. And I don't want to have any she's she's, she's brutal. I mean, she doesn't use any physical violence. She doesn't need to. Or she has to do as is look at you with her eye. She is very expressive eyes. And they say a great deal.
So you've been studying her for for about six months in this regard? Or maybe long? Yeah, yeah. And a friend at the at the ranch?
Yes, Your Honor. Yes. And we've been we've been working with her on trauma in her past because she was wild for the first 10 years of her life and she had many babies. And when my her owner, Barbara and I are talking about children, and trauma, she will come close, even though there's lots of beautiful spring grass to participate in the conversation. But there's also Leo who's just right under the table, my our nine and a half month old puppy. He's also relentless in his messages about one's internal state, he has a very loud and piercing back. So if I'm discombobulated or not present, or if one of us in the family is not, he will go up to that person and back. And it's so loud that you'll lose your hearing, you know, you know how when loud noises sudden and sharp is very loud. So he will do that. And he has other ways of trying to bring you back into your body. And my horse Spitfire, she has her way, which is just rub my belly. If you just rub my belly, you'll feel much better. So you rub her belly, and then she'll turn her head around, and with her teeth work up and down your spine, or on your buttocks or on your hips, depending on where you need it. And I mean their teeth. I don't know if you've ever been bitten by a horse. It's very painful. And it's the most amazing massage because it's Yeah, and she always knows where the spot is. So it's it's a remarkable experience to have these animals mirror back the importance of soul hygiene so anyway that that's just a little word that I wanted to put in there. I don't know if it's a really if it's the best i'm i'm really up for an improvement on that but that's the best I've come up with so far. To describe all that you guys have said today
we're at the top of the hour I'm very yeah stunned with everything that everyone has said. So thank you all for showing up and sharing. It comes to mind to somehow someday get together in person. attempts. attempts. Forest
anything.
Yeah. Tim's like gotta be a good word for it like the the outpost you know, the outpost for the future or Laura liens, got plans. We've got plans someday. Sometime I would just love to get together in person. And hear what's happening.
Along those lines, I ended up with a longer conversation with Nancy poor who I think a fair bit of, you know, from our conversation Jeff and Louisa and she really extended an invitation to come out to white feather soon. And so I'm trying to conspire a good reason to do that and gathering with you all there to to find work on that kind of place would definitely inspire me to come south.
That's in the basically, that's about an hour from the Tahoe region. So it's like, three hours from San Francisco.
Yeah. You're wondering. Eldorado just above Eldorado. Yeah. Before Placerville.
Yes, that's the ranch where Jake and I were married. We had a big barn wedding on that property. Because it was really cool. We had people from all over the world there for a week of festivities.
Yeah.
He plans to come out to California law rolling.
And love to that's that's place I'd really like to come one day, but me to be able to travel again.
Yeah,
how much you learn new plans come out west. Well,
I'm constantly daydreaming. But one of the things I was realizing when we talked about time is I have a similar relationship to space, which is that I, because I'm so far from so many amazing people. I've learned that you can travel
without traveling,
like, definitely in my sleep. I'm a traveler. I think it's how come I got here, Jeff, cuz I kept traveling and you kept traveling. And it was like, Okay, fine. Let's do this. Like, we were connected anyway. Right? Like, I feel really strongly connected. So although I would love to be able to physically be in California, I accept that. We're physically where we need to be and then we're also where we need to be if that makes sense.
Well, thank you all for showing up. Right here in the in the space.
And right, Lisa, please transcribe it. You said we always record these
so I can put a transcription up on the on the you know,
and then turn it into a T shirt.
Yeah.
Maybe I'll embroider phrases of it on something. I
don't know. That sounds good.
Guys, so good to see everybody. Take care everyone. See
