I've had classes where employees have been in tears, about our smartphones and our laptops and the expectation we're responding to emails all hours of the day. So it comes down to, you have to determine where is your peace of mind? And what's your boundary need to look like? Nobody can function 24/7
The old adage goes, Are you working to live or living to work? Another way of looking at that question might be that Tennessee, Ernie Ford hit 16 tons. What do you get another day older, and deeper in debt. If you're worried about owing your soul to the company store, perhaps you should be looking at work life balance. This is random acts of knowledge. I'm your host, Steve fast. Today, we're going to be talking about the balance between your home life, your work life, and your overall life. Today's guest will tell us a little bit about how you can keep everything balanced out.
I'm Lisa Somers, and I am a personal trainer and wellness coach, I am fortunate I get to do a lot of different classes and events at Heartland as a consultant. So I work with people as one on ones I do small group training, I do some workshops. And I do some corporate training classes here as well on different topics that relate to work life, balance, health and wellness.
When it comes to work life balance, what are the questions that everyone should ask themselves, when assessing if they have the proper amount of balance between their life outside of work and their work life?
I think people struggle a lot with work life balance, because we have obviously a lot of demands placed on us at home, and at our jobs, regardless of what your occupation is. So the one thing that stands out I've used in other talks is I use a quote that says, ultimately, you are the CEO of your life, hire, fire, and promote accordingly. And I think if we look at work life balance in that regard, we ultimately are the CEO. So if things are out of alignment, or if we're miserable, then how can we make adjustments because we're ultimately in control of that?
I think maybe some people would consider that power not entirely in their own hands. They may have demands from their employer that they feel are encroaching on their life outside of work. But their employer still has that degree of need, or is still asking for things. So how does one assess what is fair and what is not fair? When it comes to the demands of
work? I think communication is always key. In so many facets of our life, a lot of our understanding of expectations, and reality of expectations don't match up, because we didn't have a good communication with set employer. So if we feel that too many demands, or too much time is expected of us, the first place to start is with open communication about how you're feeling that will then show you if you're in fact correct. And their expectation is maybe more than you're able to do peacefully or well, and or if they don't expect that I've had classes where employees have been in tears, about our smartphones and our laptops and the expectation we're responding to emails all hours of the day, and having different Dean's and managers in those classes. No one has that expectation. We have access, it's available. If we want to look at that at midnight, we'll see that we got emails, but nobody expects a response at one in the morning or six in the morning.
Let's talk about that. Because now that we live in this interconnected age, you can remain connected with work 24/7. And some people do that. And you know, you might have some people that that's the time that they catch up on their emails is at eight o'clock at night, and then they send out the response to somebody that works with them. And some people feel the pressure to respond. How do you set healthy boundaries when it comes to your availability, because the very fact that you could be available through your smartphone might make people feel the pressure that they have to be available.
I love that you brought up boundaries, because that's one of the things I talked about in all my health and wellness classes, but also in my work life balance because essentially, back to the CEO, you also are in control of the boundaries you set. So if your expectation I tend to be a type A personality, who's always trying to be more type B. So when I started the business I would get text from clients or potential clients, I may get a text message is 6am I and my Type A personalities respond. I don't want things on done. And then I realized I'm an entrepreneur running a business so I have more flexibility of my hours yet I'm responding to things it's 630 in the morning and 1130 at night, boom, I needed to create a new boundary. So I look at it like, unless it's critical, urgent, Nobody needs me at 630 in the morning, my kids may need me. But nobody at work needs me at 630 in the morning most days, so I don't respond until eight o'clock, I get my son to school, and now I'm ready to be in work mode. And then I do a lot of work at midnight, because I can quietly get invoices sent or planning done. But just because I send an invoice and someone may message me doesn't again mean I need to respond to that. So it comes down to you have to determine where is your peace of mind? And what's your boundary need to look like? Nobody can function 24/7 It's when we start to get bogged down because we're responding at 1am. And we're back in the office at 730 that we start to feel resentful and stressed and no balance.
Do people have problems feeling empowered to set their own boundaries?
Absolutely. We don't give ourselves permission to be where we should be with work, we don't give ourselves permission to self care, we don't give ourselves permission to make time for a workout. And I think it's important for the employers to recognize the research here that we know when people feel more empowered. Because we've given them that power, a little bit of power makes a difference. And we ask them to take care of themselves. And we incorporate self care or encouragement to get to the fitness facility. When we encourage them to take care of themselves. What we see from the employee standpoint is happier, healthier, more centered employees who are then more productive and more creative and more willing to give us what they are able to give us.
Do employees need to, as you mentioned, communicate to their boss, what the boundaries are. Is that something where you need to say yes, it's okay that you text me, for instance, outside of work hours, but I don't feel obligated to respond during this time or that time? Is that the onus of the employee to do that? Or is it the onus of the HR department is the onus of the boss, that's the area where I think a lot of people struggle, especially, you know, ultimately, your boss has so much power over your work life in what he or her might assess as being their expectations of you. So there are people that are real go getters, and they're gonna respond to every text, as soon as they get it no matter what time of night it might be or day it might be. And that's their choice. But I think people worry and are evaluated and kind of what we consider to the rat race of work, that if they're not doing everything that everybody else is doing, they're going to suffer for it in some way. By comparison,
I think we get back to what you said at the beginning of that. And it's very important because communication is always the key. I've worked in a lot of different industries, private sector, public sector, I've now owned my own business for over six years. And quite frankly, there's always different expectations. So if we don't know what's expected, and we're not honest with what we're able to give, then we create stress from the lack of knowing. So hopefully, you're working for someone or with an HR department that you can be pretty honest with where you're at in life. Nobody wants sick employees or overstressed employees that are going to call in sick, because that doesn't help production. But that being said, I laugh because I train all different types of clients from top level executive to just finishing their degree in their first career. And I see across the board, all these job postings. Now all these careers say we respect work life balance, we believe in flexibility. And yet I get them as clients and they say, it was all a farce. They don't believe that at all. It's production. And they need me to do this and that. So that's a reality of what the world looks like. We no buzzwords for good employees to hire. We say we honor work life balance, and we respect you know, being moderate with your demands. But depending on the day or week or segment, you may not be able to fulfill that for your new employees. So as an employee, we also have to be realistic. Just like life, there's going to be times your work is going to demand more a fact of life. We're going to have new product or new pushes. We're trying to feature new things. And that may require you to do a little more work, but it's not going to be forever. You don't want to keep it that pace forever. Just like life. Someone gets sick. Your car breaks down Whatever the case you're going to have times your life demands more. That's kind of the check and balance or the end and the yang of how we manage both. So when you're in that hot fire, and you have a lot of work, you may not be able to get as much done at home as you hope or like, that's reality, that table will turn though work will become more of a LoL Or get more comfortable, and then something at home may demand more. So we have to give ourselves more permission to take on a day at a time, communicate what our needs are, for having health issues, or a situation with a family member, we may want to communicate that to our boss. So they don't think we're slacking or disinterested. We're just really struggling to maintain that balance at work. Because personally, we have some big things happening.
We've talked quite a bit about the demands that might make somebody's work day longer or more intense. And the demands that happen after regular work hours. But quite often, just within the constraints of a regular work week, stressful things might happen. And people can take that stress home with them. And even though they're just coming in, say from 830 to five, or the course of a normal workday, you know, the work is so it was with them when they when they leave and come home. How do people are there techniques that people can engage in that can help mitigate that stress that can help you disengage from work quite often people, you know they're at home, but their brain is still working. And I mentioned
I'm a personal trainer. That's one. So I believe in exercise for a lot of decompression, it's in the stress. And we know fitness is good for us. And I'm a proponent, obviously. But I also say when it comes to fitness, let's think about what helps us so for one person that's going to put in a lot of weight and lifting and getting in a hardcore workout. And for my next person it may be is an hour walk after work and decompressing. And so we got to figure out what part of exercise is actually going to benefit us because I don't feel like it's a one size fits all. But I will say in the last two years, particularly, my business has angled more. And I mentioned the wellness coaching, because mindfulness is really huge with our health. And as a Western civilization that has so many opportunities with smartphones and laptops and engaging, we tend to not be very mindful, we are plugged in but not engaged. We don't actively listen. And we particularly don't listen to ourselves. So when you talk about coming home from work, we need to be mindful of what are some things that help us decompress. And I don't have a recipe for that because every single person would give me a different answer. But I do encourage my clients, my classrooms, to think about what helps me relax, a cup of hot tea, a walk, chatting, cleaning going to the gym, that could look different. But I would definitely encourage the thought of the mindfulness of what helps and then actively putting that as an after work activity.
Quite often employers try to do what they can, as you say, sometimes it tends to be lip service, in some instances, but quite often, there are very engaged HR departments that do offer things. And what's kind of ironic is sometimes when part of your problem is you get 150 emails a day one of those services from HR to maybe help you with work life balance, or to de stress or to have some sort of workplace development, that sort of thing that you mentioned that you are engaged in. It's just another email and people don't don't take time to that take time to really investigate that. Is that something that employees should really spend a little bit more time looking at things that their own organization might offer? Whether it be like a wellness initiative? Or perhaps like I said, professional development class, stuff like that? Are those things that can make a difference?
Absolutely. I talk to a lot of my clients and they say exactly what you just said it's one more email that they probably perhaps didn't open or read well, so what are we physically doing? And this is where I'm trying to hit a lot more corporate markets. What are we physically doing ashore employees? We do care about wellness, whether that's having the gym hours extended, or discounts on gym memberships, or a wellness person on site once a week where you can drop in and say hey, listen, I don't know how to eat Eat well, because I'm confused at all of the crazy stuff I read, or what are some things you would recommend for my stress level with this. And I think if we physically show our employees, maybe through health initiatives, maybe healthy food on campus, for Heartland, maybe at a corporate retreat, having a segment on health and wellness, then it's now one more email, it's physically there for the employees to use or see. And that's where a lot of my clients feel frustrated. A lot of people I talked to are frustrated, because we say a lot of things. And email is just one more thing. And unfortunately, that's a means of communication. But most people are like, it's just one more thing that I need to read, I already have an in basket full of 200 things. So we need to look at that. And really think about how can we physically make a difference for our employees, I have a lot of ideas, if anybody wants to chat about it.
Well throw one of them at us. Now, I have a facility
in town that is letting a wellness coach, it's not a full time position. Because most companies don't truly need a wellness person day in and day out employed. But come on to the site, once a week, twice a week, half days, and be available for their employees, ask questions, exercise ideas, maybe healthier food items, mindfulness. And the same places also has hired a friend of mine who is a massage therapist, very talented, where she does chair massages, take a break over your lunch hour, make a quick appointment, she can do miracles in 10 minutes. So to me that's speaking through a physical change in the environment. And the employees hear that they see it and hear it.
So how do people find that motivation to take control to take that first step to really evaluate their work life balance and start to take some of these measures to get a handle on it.
I read a book this summer and I keep sharing this and it seems to tie in with this class. Because when we look at life, a lot of us create a living but we don't make time for a life. We just go through the motions. And the book was called the Top Five Regrets of the Dying. It was actually pretty somber book to read, because everybody in the book was terminally ill. But it taught me a lot. And one of the main quotes that stuck with me is the top regret across the board of people that know they're dying. wish they would have had more courage to live a life that was very important to themselves that was meaningful, important to themselves, and that they would have not just lived a life based on what everybody else expected of them. And I think if we all think about that, then that's a place to make adjustments.
Lisa, thanks so much for joining us.
Thank you for having me.
lifebalance.
Appreciate it. Thank you for having me.
Lisa Summers is a personal trainer and teaches professional development classes and workplace development classes. If you'd like to hear more topics on health and wellness, as well as many other subjects, subscribe to this podcast on Apple podcasts, Spotify or wherever you heard this one. Thanks for listening
