right? I even had a client one time, say, and talk about. So this is not a work context. But it was a situation with her husband, where they had had a number of fights, and about money, and he would sort of criticize her about her use of money. And then she had told him, I have my own, like she had her own income, they had separate bank accounts, you're not invited to comment about my use of money. And so one night at dinner, he made a comment about some orange pillows she had bought in and put by their pool, and it just sent her off the chart, she was so mad, that he would do it. But if we treat that comment and treat that statement, as a boundary violation, so she had said, speaking about money, criticizing me about my use of money as a boundary violation. If we treat that as a boundary violation, it can kind of step us out of the space of just being reactive and sitting in the unfairness of it. And also, frankly, in a situation of touching at work, which can be unsafe, in a situation of commenting on people's appearance, which can feel unsafe, like in any of these situations where it can feel unsafe. If we have a structure for how to deal with boundary violations and plan on them happening, then it's not as actually unsafe, you can still experience someone having unsafe behavior, or just behavior that is like, not what you want to tolerate for any reason. It doesn't have to be unsafe to be behavior you don't want to tolerate coming into your space. And and then you can have steps for handling it and not have to take yourself out of the situation. Or just sit in that space of feeling disrespected, feeling dehumanized, feeling afraid. So for me when I was in my workplace situation. The biggest thing for me that was a boundary violation is my boss would put his hand on my shoulder. And like, to me, in my mind, I was describing it like he's massaging my back all the time, he won't stop touching me. It felt very scary. And I was sort of like, you know, I have to work late at night, and he's the only person here this could escalate to something dangerous. But ultimately, when you reduce it to I don't want people to put their hands on my shoulder at work. Like that's true for anybody. To me. That's a zero times event experience at work. I just don't appreciate being touched at work. It wasn't even about him. Although it was it felt scarier because it was him. But we can say I don't appreciate when people comment on my use of money. I don't appreciate when people describe me. Like that, honestly, is a very common boundary. Humans do not appreciate being described, even if you're trying to compliment them. They tend to did not like it. And so if you can reduce it to this as just a boundary that I have in my space, it becomes more clear. And even if there is somebody like the Student Conduct hearing, who believes that their boundary overlaps with yours, you are still allowed to enforce your boundary, as you see fit. Sometimes there are consequences for that, right. So if he believes his boundary overlaps with hers, and he needs to enforce his right to violate her boundary, it's not a real boundary at that point, honestly, because people have their own autonomy and their own bodily integrity. So that's obviously not like a real thing that is more invasion and control because it's not about his space, it's about going into her space. However, like even in that situation, like if he wants to enforce his boundary of touching her, then there may be consequences for him. There may be criminal consequences for him ultimately, because as a society, we've agreed that some boundaries are enforceable in the law, other boundaries are still valid, and they're not enforceable by law.