Or I would find that pleasant and you're hating it, you know, those are kind of the two sides of the spectrum. But it's so much more complex than this. And so when I read this book, sensory integration and the child, it really went into that nuance for me, like, it's basically one of the first textbooks for occupational therapist. And I didn't write any notes for this. So like the, maybe it'll come to me later. The author's name is has slipped my mind. But it was one of the first people who studied sensory integration. And the one caveat I have with this book, as far as recommending it to others. First of all, it's very expensive. Very, very expensive, because it's a textbook for students. And textbooks are expensive. But also it was written in like the 70s. And while most of the book like the science as far as the research on sensory modulation, and integration is really great. But the it has a lot of outdated information about autism specifically, like if you do go and read this book, please either skip or take with a grain of salt, the chapter on autism because it's working with really outdated perceptions of autism basically thinks that you have to be like, aggressive and nonverbal to be autistic. And that is just not true. And the new research is really showing that. So it would classify anyone who is not aggressive as just having sensory processing disorder and not as autism. But as we've learned, like since the 70s, that was a long time ago. The research has moved along, and I wish when they had republished this work, they had included a little more in information about that. That's my one caveat for the book. However, everything else in the whole book is about autism. The whole book is about neuro divergence, and sensory processing. And it's, it's it, it opened up for me, and added so much nuance to my understanding of sensory experience in a lot of ways. But the thing that really, really clicked for me, that I'd never heard of before, is this concept of sensory modulation. And that's what we're going to dig into in this picture book. So sensory modulation is your brain's automatic process of turning the intensity of different senses up or down. This is mind blowing for me, as a late diagnosed autistic adult, who was always told that my sensitivity was like a flaw, and that I shouldn't be over, quote, overreacting to different experiences like water in my face, or the same in my sock or tag in my shirt, like whatever it was, that it was my fault, how I was reacting. And what we've learned, when you take on board this sensory modulation, is that when your sensory modulation is working in a neurotypical way, that a neurotypical brain automatically tunes out certain senses that it automatically deems as unimportant. So, let's say a neurotypical is sitting at a busy restaurant, and they're trying to have a conversation, they're probably not feeling the contact of their clothes on every part of their body, they're probably not hearing the hostess sort silverware at the front of the restaurant, they're probably not hearing the cooks having conversations in the kitchen, every other conversation happening in that room, the buzz of the light bulb, the tapping of somebody's foot or hand, they aren't feeling like the crack in the cushion of the booth that they're sitting in there, they may not feel how hot or cold they are, in that moment, they don't notice the music that's playing like, their brain can automatically either turn those senses down to a very low level, or tune out completely any one or numerous of those sensory inputs. And so a neurotypical, when they go to a restaurant, they will hear most loudly and clearly the thing they choose to pay attention to. So there's a combination here. And I think this happens in language when they're like, Okay, when someone tells you to focus on this, this is something that is more possible for neurotypicals, right? So they can kind of shift their focus to and from certain areas, they can be like, Okay, I'm having a conversation, and their brain automatically assist in this by turning down. Now, if someone in the conversation says, Hey, I think I know this song, do you, then their brain will turn the music, that level of the music up, because they've shifted their awareness. Now, for all my neurotypicals listening, this is not an artistic or neurodivergent experience. So everyone's brain is different. And not like we're all unique. So if you had 10 autistic people, they would tell you 10 different experiences. But one thing that we have in common is that our sensory modulation, often we get way more sensory input than a neurotypical. And so we hear the sound of the lightbulb sometimes, or we hear the sound of the silverware. And it doesn't melt away when we're having a conversation. And so just imagine, like 10 Different TVs on with the volume at 100. And trying to just listen to one. It is very this is one of the reasons that we struggle with communication. So that concept kind of blew my mind because it gave me a window into actually the neurotypical experience because one of the main reasons that autism can be misdiagnosed or overlooked is we think everyone is experiencing the same thing. And so I thought everyone was overloaded, that their senses were overloaded, and they were just better at quote focusing because this is what worked Hold to do is to focus on one particular thing. Now, I will say that it's not that. I mean, I can't speak for everyone, but for myself, it's not that I have zero sensory modulation. But my brain's ability to modulate senses is greatly dependent on my, on my environment on my regulation. And so like, the more overstimulated I am, and the more that's going on, the less I can kind of tune certain things in or out, like I, I have some limited ability to do that. But it's definitely not something I can count on, always being able to do. And so depending on like at a restaurant, it would depend on how busy the restaurant is, how loud everyone is, if there's music going on what kind of music it is how hungry I am, like, it's really complicated. But the thing that we want to explore in this book is just the simple idea that brains have this ability to turn senses up and down. And that for some people, these are the neurotypicals that happens automatically. And they have a very narrow sensory experience. And for some, that is either not happening at all, or it's happening. Um, it's