Hello, and welcome to the Kansas reflected Podcast. I'm Sam Bailey. And I'm joined today by Marty Hillard, Director of Community Engagement at Kansas Children's Discovery Center, and a local musician, songwriter, and poet. He's also won a multitude of awards and honors for his work in music, journalism, advocacy and Creative Arts. Welcome.
Thank you so much for having me. I appreciate it.
Yeah, thank you for coming. starting us off here. Can you just tell us a little bit about what Kansas Children's Discovery Center is?
Sure. So I'm gonna go ahead and read this, so I can get this accurately. So the Kansas Children's Discovery Center is a hands on children's museum with a mission to enhance the lives of children and enrich the communities it serves. So we've been in operation since 2011. I've been the director of community engagement since December 13, of 2022. And a lot of what we do is provide opportunities for children and families to have access to learning opportunities through the power of play. We believe that play is a fundamental, fundamental tool for children and families to not only learn and grow together, but to be able to interact and develop relationships. And that's a lot of what we try to create. We're located on the south west edge of gage Park, where the Topeka Zoo is located, of course, the mini train and the gauge park on the whole, so very happy to be a part of the gage Park community. But we also do a lot of outreach through our Mobile Museum program, we're able to take all mobile versions of all of our different activities and stations, out to schools, gymnasiums, churches, parking lots throughout the state of Kansas.
And do you help organize this? What do you what is your specific role here?
Yeah, so as the director of community engagement, a lot of what I'm doing is helping forge relationships or fortify the relationships that we already have, with corporate partners, sometimes with volunteers. So it's not just about resource development, it's not necessarily just about giving, but also implementing some of these programs, like I had mentioned, Mobile Museum is one that we're able to take out throughout the state of Kansas, we do quite a bit of traveling. We also have a number of access programs like play free is one that we do in partnership with the Department of Corrections, where we have a number of women who are incarcerated that come visit us once a month or once every couple of months, and then their children are able to spend a day of play with them. We provide them with breakfast and lunch, and then lots of activities for them to enjoy. So that's another program. We also have sensory friendly Sunday. So the second Sunday of the month, folks with children who are on the spectrum are able to come and have the same experience that we offer to all of our regular visitors. But in just a much more low key fashion, something that's more appropriate for for children with sensory issues. So yeah, so we have a number of different programs that that we execute. We've got a really great team both full time and part time, small but mighty team. And we've got about 15,000 square feet inside four and a half acres outside a fenced in area. We also have our native wild grass and Prairie outside as well for people to enjoy. So yeah,
and what is it like to be able to give kids that maybe wouldn't have access to these play and the things that you offer if it wasn't for you traveling out there?
Sure. I mean, a big part of it is is recognizing that every community, even though each community has its own distinct needs, that a lot of a lot of folks are really in need of a lot of the same opportunities that anybody else would have, whether that's in a rule or an urban environment, or a resource rich neighborhood versus one that's lacking in resources that, that we have children in these communities that want to have the same types of opportunities. And so, you know, while they're the primary goal is for there to be an environment of play where learning can occur. It's just really excited, exciting to see people engaged in joyful experiences. And again, an interactive experiences and ones that they see themselves reflected in. We were just at Marysville sky fest last Saturday where they had a number of sky divers, and they have fireworks later on into the evening. But we had maybe about 250 300 kids who immediately came to our Mobile Museum program and saw a station that they really identified with whether that was a veterinary station or a lemonade stand, or our wind tunnel or our Lightboard They were able to jump in immediately. So for me, what that tells me is, that's a really good sign that, you know, kids see themselves reflected in that play. It doesn't require a lot of instruction, they can immediately jump in. And it's self guided. And that's really important. So,
yeah, and pivoting a little bit to your earlier work. You mentioned to me personally, but you did some advocacy activism work in 2017 2018, after the shooting of Dominique white, can you tell me a little bit about what you did?
Yeah, so a lot of that was just an reflection of having known his family members, you know, as acquaintances, various family members of his throughout the years, and knowing that on both sides of his family that, that they were in a lot of pain and a lot of hurt, and really needing community support. So for so as far as the audience is concerned, you know, for those of you that don't know, Dominic, ye was 30 years old, shot and killed by members of Topeka Police Department on September 28 2017. And news quickly spread that day, you know, that a shooting had occurred and nice to peek in that he was the one who was shot and killed. I think there are a lot of members of the community who in particular, were were frustrated, not only at his death, but the level of violence that had been occurring. At the time, I know that by the end of 2017, that the record for a number of homicides was reset at 3030 Total homicides. One thing, one thing with regard to that statistic, though, is that it doesn't include people who had been shot and killed by the police in that year, any any year for that matter. And for me, I think that's, that was also a big personal concern is knowing that as much as you know, violence occurs in our society, you know, at the hands of, you know, one citizen to another, I think, you know, it's equally you know, it's it's of the same importance that we, that we recognize the the violence that's enacted by our local police department. And so I think that's a big part of why I wanted to get involved. I'm also growing up in central Topeka, and having like a personal history of my friends and I having been harassed by previous regimes, previous iterations of Topeka Police Department. All of those things factored into to why I wanted to be more involved. And what happened in particular is that typical police department as well as law enforcement agencies across the country go through an accreditation process by by a governing body called Kalia. So see a L EA, I don't know what it stands for. I believe they're Texas based. But anyway, they had an accreditation process where they invited members of the public to give their feedback as to the work that they thought were was being done with regard to local law enforcement. And that was something that that happened, I want to say between November and December, I met a number of people at that particular event. And we quickly decided that we'd like to do something more than what had been done at that point, which was, you know, numerous protests over over at the police station, the Sheriff's Department. And so then we coordinated a series of community conversations called new confidence. Those took place at the library from December 2017. through April of 2018. We're again, where we invited members of the public to, to hear their personal grievances, and to really give honest feedback about what what types of interactions they had had with local law enforcement. So
and with the work that you've done, and with other people have done and just trying to make this better. Has it gotten better? Have you seen positive change?
Yeah, I mean, it's all it's all relative. And I And I'm not saying that just to be diplomatic. I mean, the reality is that I know personally, for me, when I embarked on the work that this is something that doesn't happen overnight. And I've said this before, I'm on record about this, that that when you engage with with this type of work, this is something that's multi layer, this is something that's systemic, and takes a lot of time, a long time to unbind you know, sort of the restrictions and the barriers that people face when we're talking about barriers that are systemic, so I'd like to, I'd like to believe, I think maybe the thing that has changed the most is the length that everyday citizens are willing to go to advocate for justice. That's something that I've definitely really seen change people's people's capacity and their will for for speaking up against against these barriers and against these systems, you know, has changed quite a bit beyond that, you know, everything else just kind of takes time. So
for someone who isn't a part of maybe a minority group who has or who hasn't firsthand experienced police brutality or what comes with police brutality, is there anything you can say about just what it is like to be someone who's always aware of it?
Sure. You know, I mean, it's complicated, right? Because I think even my own perception of that, that hyper awareness has changed over time, because, you know, being being so aware of your personhood, and how you present to the world, and how people perceive you, not only as a society, but like, also, you know, just in your neighborhood, you know, in these very, in these very microscopic ways. That is something that's difficult to navigate, that's something that, you know, I still carry a lot of awareness around. And yet, you know, as a husband and a father, it's also very important to me that, you know, that I hold my head high and, you know, remain a dignity at all times, with regard to just how I perceive myself is very important to me to have, you know, just just a high, high perception of myself, you know, in the, in the face of, you know, systemic racism, prejudice, injustice, it's something where I've seen it be so disruptive in people's lives, you know, people that are a part of marginalized groups, or have a marginalized identity to where, you know, it's all consuming, and there was definitely a point in my life where just that hyper awareness was consuming to me as well. But there's a point where you get exhausted being on fire all the time being angry, and feeling like you have to, to carry the weight of how you're being perceived in the world around you. So a lot of so in that way, I mean, a lot of that has changed for me. You know, freedom is very important to me, Joy is very important to me, these are things that I'm actively seeking out, despite what I might have experienced in the past, or what I may continue to experience as a black man in America. I, I am, I am resolute in finding joy, in as many experiences as possible for all of the years that that I was sort of lost, you know, in my indignation
as a father trying to find joy and moving through life with joy with your children, is that something that you've thought about with next generation and encouraging joy through this world?
Yeah, I mean, my child was born March 2 2015, three days before my birthday, and the Trump administration was elected in the office in 2016. And again, these are conversations that I've had, you know, with other folks, you know, about racism, about xenophobia, about fear, the idea that fear mongering is such a pervasive part of our society. When we talk about identity, I think a lot of people have adopted fearful and fearsome identities around this idea of, you know, who is to blame for for the world that we live in. And that's something that that my child, they they've been acutely aware of, from, from the day that they were born. Because my wife and I were, you know, we were very determined that as much as, as much as it's a priority to want to protect your child's innocence. We also have to equip our child in a way that they can navigate the world as it exists. And they can have a better understanding of not only the world around them, but the world that my wife and I were raised in and the experiences that that we've had. That's also very important to us to not shy away from those things. Again, you know, as a black man in America, I'm not in a position to withhold those realities. You know, from from my child. And I'm really grateful that, you know, my wife and I are raising a child that's emotionally intelligent and able to make these observations on their own and to come up with conclusions on their own. And, and that's the one thing I'm most proud of is that I think I think people, people are under undersell that, what the capacity that children have, or you know, or their, or their ability to observe things or to come up with conclusions. And I think for us, that's just that's paramount. So
and you are, like I mentioned at the top here, you're a musician, you do a lot of work in music. How did you get into music?
Yeah, so yeah, I mean, I was always I was always a big fan of music. When I was a child, my sister and I sing along to songs on the radio, we grew up in a Christian household. And so we sang a lot of worship songs. And we sang in church together. A few times when we lived in Kentucky when I was very young. When I turned 11, my brother had been in the Navy and he was stationed in Florida. And he was, he was in a rap group called Golden street gangsters. Like a Christian gangster rap group, which was, as that was a big thing, and like the 80s, and the 90s, you know, is that and I think just like in an effort to like reach more people, adopting like, the sort of like archetypes that we that we saw on mainstream media, which at the time was like, very, like hardcore gangster rap. But but with a very, like, you know, spiritual message. And so I remember he sent me a VHS of him and his bandmates performing. And I just remember being like, Well, I really want to do that. So then, when he moved back to Topeka, we started a rap group when I was 11 years old, and that would have been 1994. And so just kind of from there. It's always always been a fan of music. I picked up a guitar shortly shortly thereafter and started writing folk music while I was in high school and writing poetry. And yeah, when I graduated high school, I went to Washburn very briefly from I always say, from Labor Day to Thanksgiving, because I enrolled August of 2001. And then, and so it was bookended by 911 Incredibly tragic. And then a lot of my friends, a lot of my friends happened to be the youngest children and their families. And so a lot of a lot of my friends parents were getting divorced. And so that was, that was something that was very much affecting, you know, my my close friends and our outlook on the world and what our futures would be like, and then coming up on Thanksgiving, I fell off the back of my friend's car. We, you know, just just horseplay just playing around. And so when I fell off the back of his car, and, and, you know, I was lucky to stand back up and it's like, oh, everything is fine. You know, I thought to myself, well, what do I really want to do with my life? So I went and dropped out of school. And I told my parents two weeks later, because you can't tell them that you dropped out of school the same day you drop out, so. So after that I previously owned like a Subaru Legacy station wagon. Got my station wagon started touring the Midwest with my guitar. So
and are you in a band right now? Yeah, so
currently, I'm in hardcore Hip Hop trio called ebony tasks. We've been in operation since 2010. My bandmates are Daniel B. Smith and geese Kisa key. Daniel lives in Lawrence and geese lives in Kansas City. And that's the way it's been since. Since we embarked on this journey. We've got a full length album mountain. Yes, a lot of fun.
And talking about your past, you told me a little bit about your story then. And then we talked earlier about activism. Do you have a certain message that you see in your music?
I don't necessarily know if there's like one, one specific message. I mean, you know, I think resilience is a is a common thread, advocacy, a willingness to, you know, explore, I think, I think as far as being a lyricist. The one thing for us having been together coming up on 13 years and only have one full length album. I was really agonizing the idea of holding a mirror to myself. There are lyrics that took me years to write because I believe there's a responsibility that I carry, you know, with the words that I say Um, especially as a rapper, you know, a rap writer or a poet that a lot of what you're saying, I mean, these are invocations, these are not just words being said, you know, there's a chanting element involved, you know, there's hooks that you write, like, it's so, so anyway, I recognize, you know, a deep sense of responsibility to the words that I say. And so I just want to make sure that I'm saying things that are that are really meaningful. And I think that comes across, you know, we've really been fortunate to have so many people that I think, you know, understand what we're about to a depth, that, you know, maybe most most of our peers don't don't get to enjoy that, you know, we're saying things that are meaningful, that we care about, that are a reflection of the world around us, but also a reflection of ourselves. You know, I hope that I hope that if there's, you know, any message to be found is that our music becomes a vehicle for people to do that same analysis on themselves, you know?
Yeah. And with this analysis, and with these messages, are you wanting to continue in Kansas and keep that message here for now?
Oh, yeah, that's not an option. Yeah. I mean, you know, I'm a family man and proud to be, I'm really grateful to have had, you know, enjoyed a friendship with my bandmates for all these years. One that, you know, we talk all the time that there's nothing I'd be because we've always lived in different cities, you know, I always want to make sure that my bandmates understand that if they were ever to pick up and go and need to be somewhere else geographically that, you know, our friendship doesn't go away and our opportunity to collaborate, should they choose, it doesn't go away, either. You know, I think that's the biggest lesson that I've learned. Being a collaborative musician, or being a person in a band or in bands is that there's an opportunity that, that you have to grow and mature with the people around you. But you have to be vocal about that you have to communicate those things. So yeah, I mean, with that said, Yeah, well, we'll be here. I mean, there's, it's such a, that's such an interesting question only because it's a question that that we've been asked a lot in a variety of different ways and settings over the years. But a big part of what we've written about, you know, is the world around us as we see it through the lens of Kansas and Missouri. And so those two things are really inextricable at this point. Yeah. So it's almost like, I don't know that there's anywhere else that I would need to be for, for us to do what we do so.
And you mentioned that your family man, his family, really important to you?
Oh, yeah, absolutely. You know, and increasingly, so every day, and I say that, like, you know, in all sincerity, obviously, like, your family should matter to you. Right. But, you know, that's also been a part of my growth and maturity journey is, you know, having very long conversations with, with my wife over the years, we're coming up on 16 years in October, and having, you know, lots of conversations about, like, what compromise and sacrifice means and what showing up means and how even all of those things change over time. You know, as as we change, you know, as a couple, you know, as individuals, and, you know, with our child, you know, with them being eight years old, also recognizing, you know, that responsibility and recognize that, you know, and just validating them like as, as, like a full human being, as well as like, you know, with wants and needs and desires and in wanting to honor those as well. So, yeah, all those things are really important. And I think I think I'm also really lucky that we're surrounded by people in our life, who care about who care about care about that as well. So
and you were diagnosed with type two diabetes, is that correct? Can you tell me can you just walk me through a little bit about getting that diagnosis and how it affects your life?
Yeah, was lamb. Yeah, so Thanksgiving of 2017 has probably the heaviest weight that I've been pushing 280 pounds. And that Thanksgiving, I you know, a like I always do got in bed, fully clothed, and woke up in the middle of the night like with my hands and my feet on fire. I've always dealt with neuropathy like in my left hand and my left foot for many years but yeah, that was the first time like where I woke up with you know, all my extremities and in pretty moderate pain. So I reached out to my family doctor scheduled an appointment. And then by February 2018, I got the diagnosis and she looked at me and she said, oh, you know, you definitely have diabetes. And I was like, yeah. So yeah, it's been, it's been an interesting five years. But thankfully, in recent weeks, you know, I've been able to get a one C down the lowest it's been since I was diagnosed, which I'm really proud of. It's not easy. It's lifelong. It's chronic illness, but something over time I'm doing my best to manage so
and has music helped you at all through this process?
It's complicated it you know, I would say I would say it's been a net positive, but my relationship with music also had to change. As it as related to my health, you know, health family, those things had to come first, which they hadn't for a long time, if I'm being completely honest, you know. And so my relationship with music had to change in ways that I feel really good about now. So
in to just wrap it up here. I would like to ask you if there's a lyric in any sort of music that really stands out to you or is important to you?
Yeah, I would say a recent lyric that has become a lot more important to me. In recent weeks, my friend Jeff Emsley passed away back back in April at the age of 45. prematurely, he took his own life and he is a big, a huge factor, probably like the most important factor in my having decided to pursue music, you know, as a hobby as a career. He's somebody that was such a positive force on my life that I regret not articulating that to him as much as I would have liked before he passed away. But there was a lyric that he had brought to my attention many years ago by a band from Washington DC called the dismemberment plan. And it's a song called you are invited. And it's a lyric that I'm like, I'm designing a tattoo for because I'm gonna get a tattoo eventually. But the Lyric is you are invited by anyone to do anything. You are invited for all time. And as I reflect on his life, and the permission that he gave me to be the person that I am today, that that lyric has become really important.
And I think that's a perfect place to go ahead and enter here. I appreciate you coming out here. Thank you for taking the time out of your day to tell us a little bit about your story.
