Hello, my party people, how are you? I hope this episode finds you in a pocket of ease. Or maybe that's why you're here to create a pocket of ease for yourself, in which case, congrats to you for opening yourself up to that here in this space. For the last three episodes, we've been doing some hard yet necessary, hopefully mind opening and incredibly beneficial work talking about some really important and timely stuff. We started with the truth about the endless cycle of burnout. Then two weeks ago, we discussed some of the reasons why your coping mechanisms aren't working. And it all comes back to capitalism. And most recently, last week, we discussed five ways to interrupt or five steps to interrupt the burnout cycle. Now friends, I used to have a really great memory but then I had kids and these days, I can't remember a thing. And whether or not you have or birth children, the pace of society and the amount of stuff we have on our plate plus all the shit going on in the world really isn't a conducive situation to remembering all things. So in case you're like, I listened to the episode stuff and it all resonated. I was throwing up hell yes, and oh shit all over the place. But for the freakin life of me, I cannot recall one or more than one of those steps, my friend, don't worry, I've got you always. So the five steps we broke down last week for you to do the damn thing of interrupting the burnout cycle. We're number one, disrupt your life pattern and the way the systems are impacting your self care number to slowly and intentionally implement daily sustainable practices that align with your needs. Three shifts the way you interact with life. Keep self care simple and flexible based on your capacity, bandwidth and the chaos around you. Number four, learn how the seasons energy impacts you and adjust or lean in accordingly. And allow your lifecycle to ebb and flow the way nature does so that you can remain resource throughout the year, excuse me, fifth, or number five, actively create space for yourself for inquiry and resource yourself by meeting yourself where you are confronting old beliefs and truths that are no longer true disrupting the patterns attached to them and intentionally shedding the habits that aren't serving you are going to be important. And this all includes reevaluating and reimagining your relationship with rest slowing down and pausing, as well as developing a variety of best practices that change with your this season and your capacity. Now, if you didn't have a chance to listen to the last three episodes, I really encourage you to because the information is really important and pull it and timely if I do say so myself. And when it comes to the five steps to interrupting the burnout cycle, the best place to start is with a pause which is the exact shit we need to talk about today. We're talking and intentional and calculated in a positive way pause and expansive pause, a pause that allows you to arrive in it just as you are to simply be to be inquisitive, may be creative, and then certain. And even to dream up a plan to create the beginnings of your foundation of resource meant I have no idea if that is a word. I didn't even Google it. I wrote it. I thought about it. I meditated on it.
Resource MIT for the year. If you've
been listening to the last few episodes, and no shade if you haven't, but if you have, this surely does not come as a surprise to you because along the way, in addition to all the goodness I've shared in each of the last three episodes, I've also offered an invitation to this month's spring sanctuary, which is our virtual retreat on Saturday, April 22. If you're listening to this after the 22nd No worries, know that there's another one happening in the upcoming season. Now my friend this next sentence, I'm going to say I am saying this in big, bold 200 size font. Here it is this pause is critical. This pause is critical for your spring, mental, emotional, physical and edited energetic health and for all of 2023 Now I know that that last bit may feel like a very tall order especially if you're feeling like you're barely resourced for a week or two or a full month. I completely understand and I promise you I've been there too. I'd like to offer a content warning here that I am mentioning grief very briefly and losing a loved one so if you're not feeling resourced for this conversation, definitely come back to it another day or fast forward a few minutes because I only talk about it here in this next little piece maybe fast forward a minute or two. If you've been around my orbit for a while then you know I used to be a person who was always on the go doing planning and achieving trying to make the least amount of mistakes possible and stressing and worrying every step of the way because racism capitalism white supremacy culture patriarchy sexism, you know, all the isms and all the systems. I ran myself into the ground and on asleep looking back, I didn't stop there, I swear I damn near drilled myself into the ground. And honestly, that didn't stop until I hit rock bottom after losing a loved one unexpectedly. And tragically, the grief on top of being completely burned out was way too fucking much and sent me on a downward spiral pretty fast and pretty far. And for a long time, during that time, and after, when I really realized what was going on, I felt immense shame about my burnout, my perceived ability, shame about my perceived inability to handle all of my responsibilities and show up fully and all of them, as well as shame and my grief because my family members kept going. Right? It seemed like, they just picked up and kept going, maybe after a brief pause. And I saw this, and many people in my life do this, after someone they love passed on. And I remember continually asking myself, why can't I handle this? Society would have us believe that we need to be constantly doing and achieving, always actively moving towards success. And that all we need, when it comes to grief or handling traumatic events, is that we need a few days or maybe even a week, because that's the timeline given to us, right? Social media, we've got something happening, we post about it a couple of times in the next week, we're on to the next thing, when it comes to handling our business when it comes to losing a loved one or, you know, taking care of all of the arrangements that need to be done. What do we get two, three days, maybe a week of of space to kind of do in process. And then and you know, if you're lucky enough to have bereavement days or personal days, but then when you go back to work, it's business as usual, right? It's like that grief is over there. That loss is over there. And the burnout forgetting you just bring it with you, right, everything either gets pushed to the side, or you're brought you bring it with you in your imaginary backpack, and you set it beside you. And there it is existing but not really being held and loved on and worked through. But you're not right, you're not feeling business as usual. So what do you do, right? You bypass it, you gaslight yourself, because there's no time for anything else that you don't have the bandwidth or the capacity or the freedom to deal with the stuff. Holy aggression, right. I know, as I was planning this episode, I and I got to writing my thoughts. And as this poured out of me, I was uncertain, I was going to include it. And I considered omitting it. But I decided against that since I've always promised you complete transparency. And I'm getting to the point I promise of why I'm including this story. Because for me the entire that entire experience I just outlined for you, and clawing my way out of it to get the help and support I needed to meet my grief and burnout and begin making way way through it all. And beginning to heal. All of that required a big ass pause. And because of the depth of despair that I was in because of the severity of the situation. It required a big ass pause. But I have to be honest friends like it required a complete disruption of my life. And in the best but hardest way. Because it reminded me to confront some long held, but old beliefs and truths. And let me tell you, like some of that stuff still rears its ugly head these days, five plus years later. But through all the work I've done to resource myself and be present, I'm able to meet myself there when that bullshit comes back and call bullshit on it. And of course, the grief is still there. But somehow it's softened. And I figured out a way to live with it. It doesn't go away. The burnout can the grief probably not so much. And at this point of our conversation, I feel called to say that your life situation may be completely different from mine, based on your experiences and your identities right in the intersection of all of them, how burnout and why burnout is showing up in your life may look differently than mine. And I think it's also important to acknowledge that pausing, or the idea of pausing can feel inadequate and accessible, unsafe and some other challenging emotions to all valid. If you are a black indigenous person of color like me, likely you've been taught or been made to feel that pausing is not a possibility for you. And I hear that and I understand why we were taught this. And also I want to name that my understanding from my identity only goes so far and is likely very different in terms of what indigenous and black folks experience when it comes to a conversation about or practicing pausing. So want to be very clear about that name that. But with all of that being said the common thread here is that society has a ceiling and even believing that we cannot pause. Though as we discussed over the last three weeks, we're not machines. We are living, breathing, emoting and experiencing beings that need to pause to experience, to inquire to connect with our ancestors to do Change course to feel happiness, sadness, anger, and everything in between and to literally do anything and everything, including rest, we need to pause to rest. And I know you know that. And so you know what may be coming up for you, especially if you're, you know, bipoc. Identifying, you know, there's a lot out there that is, you know, systemic in terms of our ability to rest our perception of rest. But I do believe that there are big ways that we can interrupt this that maybe we may never feel safe and open to our complete resting in the way our white counterparts might. But my friends, those of you who are bipoc, I encourage you to really, really begin reevaluating and reimagining your relationship with rest. And with pausing. And my question to all of you, no matter your identities is when it comes to your spring, mental, emotional, physical and energetic health. How do you want to experience life? A step further? And this question, not just for spring, but for the rest of 2023? How do you want your soul to feel? Now no judgement? If that question lands a little funny for you, I'll be honest, even up until like a year ago, I used to feel super self conscious posing questions that worded like that. I was afraid it would be seen as like too touchy feely to spiritual, but fuck that. And if it is for someone fine, like no worries, like, that's fine. But I'm still going to ask it because it feels 100% necessary and accurate. You know, and, and necessary and accurate for my work, right? This work that we're doing to connect deeply to ourselves to live Mindful self care, requires deep spirituality, a deep connection to oneself and a deep authentic connection to others. So I'm coming back to the questions in terms of your mental health for the spring, how do you want to feel in terms of emotional health for the spring? How do you want to feel for your physical health for the spring? How do you want to feel your energetic health for the spring? How do you want to feel? And how do you want your soul to feel for the rest of 2023? Because my friend, we are complex humans, and each of these areas deserve the spotlight. And you may find that your well being in one area is dependent on or affected by another, which makes complete sense, because the different parts of our well being are interconnected, and definitely not as separate as those individual questions or though is those individual aspects, you know, present themselves, right. I can't help myself, but to come in with some tough love at this time. Right? Because I need to ask you with this reminder is sprinting or pushing forward, especially if you've had that pace since January 1, or doing all the things but not really present? Or if you had your head in the sand, trying to get your bearings, were really just floundering? Is this really the best way forward for how you want to feel for how you want to disrupt for how you want to be an activist for how you want to support those who need you? And I get it, it's common to be like, No, but also, What other choice do I have?
Well, my friend, I'm so glad you asked. Because the choice is to disrupt your spring pattern and the cycle of the rest of your year. Real talk here, everyone's got a pattern for each season that most likely plays out the same way or similarly every year, each winter is the same. You experience spring this way annually summer that way and fall is you know, however it is. And then you might be like nope, stop, I do not have a pattern each year the season is different and that my friend may be your pattern to not have one. There are always exceptions to my rules. And if you look back though, maybe on the last few years, barring any out of the ordinary situations are happening, what is spring like for you typically hang on I have to sneeze? Excuse me. Excuse me. Oh, my apologies. Let's talk about spring irritants. So let me ask the question again. If you look back maybe in the last few years, barring any out of the ordinary situations or happenings what is spring like for you typically, for some reason, at some reason for some people, especially if winter is just like a shit time for you. In terms of your mental and emotional health, spring can often be a Welcome to Time of brightness of light and new beginnings. But what needs careful consideration here is how much of the relief you experience in the spring is simply due to the band aid, or the mask the sunlight, warm temperatures and more outside or space for enjoyment. All that time provides. My pointed question is are you actually working through the effects of the heart of winter? The hard the hard part's the hard that is winter? Are you actively dealing with the heart of winter in a way that meets the issues and works through them? This is not me judging or criticizing people I'm asking you, right, I'm not putting you on blast at all, please know that. But I see a pattern in the winter where it can be really hard anxiety wise, or in the deep sadness or lethargy that people experience both of which makes sense due to the energy present in the winter but cannot and should not simply be chalked up to what happens in the winter, like solely due to what society deems as like FOMO, right, which they heighten your anxiety because you know, you're more isolated or seasonal depression because of the DC decrease in sunlight. As I discussed in January, surviving capital and capitalism in the winter workshop, and in subsequent podcast episodes, any mental or emotional hardship that's felt during the winter, that is not related to an event or situation that happens in the winter or happened in the winter, it's tied to patterns or shit going on in other parts of the year that needs to be dealt with in those other times the year well before the winter begins, and must be dealt with through the winter as well. So what I'm saying is if you're not actively dealing with your shit, throughout the rest of the year, but kind of relying on the sunlight and warmer temperatures and the brightness of summer, you even the newness of a new schedule in the fall, like if you're relying all that on all that to like kind of get you through, then it shits gonna come to a head in the wintertime. Let me keep going. Right. Spring, you know, is generally a nice time of life that offers relief from winters, dormancy, darkness and isolation, right. So we'll use the spring as a bomb that we're like so ready to slather all over ourselves to feel better and less than the duck, right? But we're if we're not like that's not dealing with the problems, the issues at hand are dealing with the root of them. So then what happens like we head into the summer going doing taking advantage of the staff, we head into August, or in September maybe like the regular back to school back to work schedule. But we might be running on fumes by November by December we may be just be just might be hanging on by a thread, we get that like one week at the end of this at the end of the year where we can kind of slow down because that's what capitalism says. And then January 1, we hit the ground running with our resolution and our new improved plan for like how we're going to be better at all the ways or we have our head buried in the stand because we don't want to deal with any of it. Because we don't know what the hell us to do. Since we are on a runaway train, we know it and we can't figure out a way to get off even if you're on the caboose, right? You can't slow it down, you can't get off. And it's hard to buck a system. And it's hard, you know, to buck the system and the pace when everything around you is sprinting out of the gate on the first of the year. But what we know is that none of that aligns with nature's invitation to slow down, you know, to an inactive pace with reflection and dreaming with leaning into the spaciousness of an exhale. And I know that's a lot, right. Like that's a lot what I just broke down. It's it's too much. And you've probably heard me talk a bunch about winter well being and maybe a little bit puzzled on why I spent so much time talking about it now. But the reality and the reality for you is that winter may not be a tough time, depending on your dominant energy. Maybe spring is a tough time for you or summer or fall. It can be different for everyone. The reality is and my major point is like whatever is present each season, in terms of where you how you experience the season, and even energetically. Or all year round. If you just kind of are dealing with a hard time all year round, you need to begin to deal with it. And you need to deal with how the seasons energy affects you in that thing that you're dealing with. Otherwise, the pattern and the SIDS and the cycle will continue only to be exacerbated and intensified by the seasons that aggravate your natural energy and tendency. So you've got to deal with your shed. And you've got to be really clear on how each season affects you. So my question to you when it comes to spring, goes back to how do you typically experience spring? Is it a slowish and easeful place for you? Is it the next stage of Go Go that began in January? Is it a springboard into all the going and doing that you'll be doing for the summer? Is it a mask or a band aid for all the shit that happened in the winter? Are you relying simply on the sunlight and warmer temperatures to get you through? What pattern or cycle typically happens that does not serve you and how are they impacted by the summer in the fall and what needs to shift? Given where you are right now and how you're currently experiencing life? How do you think those incessant patterns and cycles will play out as nature offers us this time in spring? And that is still slow, although not as slow as winter as we welcome more bright sun warmer temperatures to lift that veil of winter and begin my friend remember begin tending the soil and begin an initial planting of what we want to take root and grow. Because as I mentioned last week, you may be feeling the dominance of one of three energies in Ayurveda, right. If you're picked a dominant or field finding your energy is currently put the dominant that's like passionate dedicated intensity even critical you might have tried hitting the ground running in January and are finding out now that you're lacking the same energy and need to pick me up. So this is a good time to lean into springs vibes Slow your roll regroup, create a new plan that maybe has a slower pace and more space and some levity and lightheartedness to your work and days. How does this feel for you? If you are coffee dominant or finding your energy is currently coffee dominated as in calm, slow moving, may be dollar on motivated even resistance to change, resistant to change, you may have loved winters DORMANCY or found that you are pulled away down into the depths of murkiness and heaviness or even despair. And with spring here, you may be experiencing one of two things, or maybe both the brightness of spring and lightness compared to winter is welcomed and much needed or flipside, it feels too much and you're wanting to go back to winter so badly. This season, subtle changes offer a gentle transition towards the light. So I encourage you to consider and remember spring is life giving. You're capable of renewing your energy daily and doing new things, maybe trying something new or something that would be gently uplifting each week. How does that feel for you?
And now if you are vata dominant or feeling that energy is currently dominant, like mobile, flexible or easily unsettled, this is your time to thrive. Spring energy springs energy will align with your need to move and be spontaneous. And remember, common grounded practices will support you as you thrive. So be sure to notice when your engine revs too high. And when you're feeling agitated, to step away, slow things down and get rooted in the present moment, which is going to be essential for maintaining harmony, as will regularly coming to grounding practices to promote that energy within you on a regular basis, not just waiting till you need them. So how does that feel for you? My friend? These three questions based on energy present all of this ties back to the first question I posed when it comes to your spring mental, emotional, physical and energetic health. How do you want to experience life and a step further for the rest of 23? And 23? How do you want your soul to feel? Because here's the thing, opening space for this inquiry and being clear on the answers are important processes in interrupting the cycle of burnout, disconnection with ourselves and living in authentically. In order to open space for this inquiry to begin even considering interrupting the cycle of burnout to begin considering a actual connection with ourselves in terms of living authentically, your pace needs to slow or be slow or slower. And once you have an inkling of what your answers are to these questions, or maybe it's a loud and clear message, or maybe somewhere in between, what do you think the first step is going to be in moving forward? A pause. And I know that may seem counterintuitive, but I can assure you as you're probably expecting, because by now you know how I roll. It's not dominant culture has this thinking that once we have an idea, we need to jump in with both feet or head headfirst in right into the fire. And sometimes that is a great method of operation. But in this case, we are going with the pause to be with the information that's coming up. Because reality. The reality is likely no matter how you're currently feeling your energy no matter what is currently dominant, no matter how you started the year off, no matter what your capacity is, a pause to regroup or simply group as endlich. Bring yourself together, is needed. The pause is needed to begin tending the soil of your life in an intuitive and meaningful way. So that you can begin a sustainable initial planting of what you want to take group take root and grow. Did you hear what I said? And honestly, without this, the pattern and cycle will continue. And I know you don't want that. You might also be wondering stuff like what if I don't have the faintest idea of how I want to feel? Or maybe how you want to feel just seems so far off and out of reach? How could it even become a reality? And I hear you sometimes we don't know. And sometimes we feel that way that it's so out of reach. But my friend I have to be honest with you, no matter what your response. The next step is the same pause. Why? Because it opens space for either the answers to reveal themselves or for you to get comfortable with them and figure out a way to move forward in small steps in the direction of where you want to go, no matter how far away it seems. Now, we need to be very clear that pausing does not mean being still in quiet period, it can, but it doesn't have to be just that. So when it comes to the spring sanctuary, you're going to be offered a few different ways to pause within one big ass pause. And I created this virtual retreat, so you wouldn't have to figure it all out on your own or do it along alone. And my friend, all of the practices are going to bring you back to yourself. So my friend within the spring sanctuary, my invitation to you is to allow yourself an entire three hours just for you to step into nature's gentle and slow vibe. I was very intentional when I choose chose this timeframe. And I know you're busy. I know you've got a lot of disrupting and activism to do, and a lot of people need your goodness. But I also know this pause based on the specific work we're doing to interrupt the cycle of burnout. To interrupt our disconnection with ourselves to interrupt living in authentically, it needs to be something substantial to really disrupt your schedule, your pattern and your cycle. Because for real friend, when was the last time you pause in a knot in not a I'm going to take a moment for myself before I lose my shit or I'm completely exhausted and need to escape from the world kind of way. My friend the words gentle and slow may have you feeling held and like you can softly exhale in a tender or or unhurried way. Or it may you have may have you feeling like you want to stretch your skin off. Maybe there's a word between not quite floating on a cloud enjoying that leisurely exhale, but also not really wanting to scratch your skin off. Right? No judgment either way. But friend gentle and slow are the names of the game for spraying. Think about all the new beginnings, births of new life rebirths of perennial plants, all of this takes time to come to fruition in a way that we can see it in the outside world, as does all the planting that you might be doing of seeds, or fruits and vegetables and things like that, that are going to begin to come for harvest in early summertime. I'll be honest, from a programming aspects, I've offered the seasonal workshops in an hour and one and a half hour format. And it always felt rushed. I felt like I was sprinting through the offering of information. And we didn't have a chance to sit with it explored our door, digest it together and looking back, I feel like it perpetuate the pattern and cycle of dominant culture to open a space for learning that a small, quick and easy, which is not all bad and not always bad. But we know that to do this work for ourselves to do this work, we need to do this very differently. So my friend, within the spring sanctuary, I'm offering you the opportunity for a critical pause to press pause on or mute or stop altogether on the noise from dominant culture. In this wide open space for inquiry into how you want to experience spring in the rest of the year, right to say fuck it all hell to what dominant culture says we are supposed to be experiencing and how. Go ahead and in this three hours, take your time exploring what comes up, we're going to open space for that, to meet yourself with compassion and patience in the answers or the answers that don't arise right? To have space for the questions that arise and to let go of the pressure to have it all figured out. Or fix everything now or in that session or even right after that. This is an invitation to get clear on what you want moving forward and begin the process of initial planting that will last for more than the next two months. Right all of this, I'm opening space for all of these things. And we'll be guiding you through practices to do this. Also to access your inner knowing and confidence in giving yourself what you truly crave, like stopping practices for stopping the bypassing for stopping the gaslighting. And then embodying the practices that you are exploring, right because it's one thing to hear about them to hear me talk about in a podcast, but to actually be led through them and experience them yourself. embody them so that you can more readily rely on them in the future, especially in the chaos and when old habits and beliefs resurface. Because it's one thing to have the information to learn it but to actually use it begin applying it to live in it is another thing, right? It's not just about information, it's about embodiment, and then embodying it when it's easy and also when it's hard. My friend, I'm opening an invitation for you to expand your power and advocating for yourself with the same fierceness, understanding and clarity as you do for others. And ultimately, my friend above all else, build a haven within yourself for tender renewal and surviving capitalist and produce next three months. My friend bring how you want to feel mentally, emotionally physically and energetic ly to life and live how your soul wants to feel. I would love to co create this space with you to be in the inquiry and exploration with you to answer any questions you have or simply just hold space for you to be in this as you need to be. So my friend Join Me Saturday April 22, from 11am to 2pm. Eastern on zoom that is 8am to 11am Pacific there will be recording but you have to register to receive the recording. And you can register@steff.com Steff Gallante It is Steff Golan de.com/spring And I've included the link in the show notes, my friend next week's episode is going to break down all the things we're going to be getting into in the spring sanctuary so hang on for that but in the meantime, definitely secure your spot. Save it and please tell all your friends and family about this. Until next time, my friend please be kind and gentle to yourself just as you would to those who are most precious to you whether that's a human, animal, baby or plant. I would love to hear your thoughts about the support and guidance and disruption I provided in this episode. So please feel free to reach out and share them with me I do really mean it I love to hear from you. And if you've been loving the show, please share it with anyone in your circle near and far and leave a review or rating please. You my friend. Remember you are a badass and you are enough now go and be your favorite self and be well
