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Hey, I'm Jon.
And I'm Becky.
And this is the We Are For Good podcast,
nonprofits are faced with more challenges to accomplish their missions and the growing pressure to do more, raise more and be more for the causes that improve our world.
We're here to learn with you from some of the best in the industry, bringing the most innovative ideas, inspirational stories, all to create an Impact Uprising.
So welcome to the good community. We're nonprofit professionals, philanthropist, world changers and rabid fans who are striving to bring a little more goodness into the world.
So let's get started. Oh, Becky, do we need this conversation so bad?
I mean, who out there right now is feeling so exhausted feeling. So burnt out feeling like you're just having to pull yourself out of bed. Friends, I can tell you, I have felt this a lot in the last couple months. And we want you to know you're not alone. And we have brought on a powerhouse today to talk about how to break the burnout cycle. And I am just so honored to introduce you to our new friend, Diaris Alexander. She is an executive consultant with InWellth. And she is this incredible human being who can build anti burnout strategies. And she is also an impact architect for all these mission driven leaders like us, who are really trying to make a difference in the world, but really combating how to find wellness and balance and our work. So we're going to Los Angeles today, you had been an operations leader, consultant and coach that really is designing strategies that deliver the results that matter. And as this founder of InWellth, whoop, whoop to women, founders and entrepreneurs. We really love that you're supporting mission driven high achievers and achieving more nourishing habits so that they can sustainably lead their lives with more passion, purpose and impact. And how good is Diaris' work? Well. It's earned her recognition dating back to 2005, including scholarships from Gates Millennium Scholars Program, the Jackie Robinson Foundation and the Kiwanis Club and she is here to talk with us about breaking that burnout cycle, how to recognize the burnout within yourself and others around you. And how do you get in there and really forge a new paths toward health and wellness and self love. So welcome, Diaris, we are so excited that you're here.
Happy to be here. Thanks so much for having me. And I gotta say, it's definitely the perfect time for this. I don't know if there are any other recovering chronic overachievers out there. But that's definitely the lens that I came into it. And I would say also, on a personal note, this year, I had a medical challenge. So you really think about burnout in terms of how it impacts your capacity. So I think I have a whole new lens on how to bring compassion to that how to really show it for myself and others. And sometimes you got to learn the hard way. But it's such a worthy fight to be in. And I think there's lots of movement towards this, as well. Hopefully not just lots of conversation, but lots of things happening. culturally, politically, etc.
Well, that was such good town setting because this is an activating community. Yes, we start with conversation, but we want to take something out of this and make these 1% shifts. And I have to say I agree with you when I saw in your bio that you support mission driven high achievers, I was like is that 95% of the sector possibly. So thank you for that vulnerability, excited to dig into your story. But we kind of want to go back, Diaris and just know about you growing up? What what did your childhood look like? And what kind of led you to this work today?
Yeah, so as I mentioned, chronic overachiever, there's like a story, my dad tells about how angry I was that I couldn't read. Because my only role models and peers were like my older sister who's like three years older than me. And then my parents, and my dad sits me down and says Diaris, you don't just start reading, you know, shortly after you start speaking. And I was like, Oh, that's not how these things work. And I think for so much of my life, I've always defined my own peers. And peers are people that care, people that want to make things happen, people that want to be supportive to their community. So I've always been connected to community causes. Often Youth Development media, and I also work full time at a nonprofit currently, so I get what it's like to be in working in silos. I get what it's like to have, you know the challenge of AI, I know there's a fundraising AI event coming up. I know, there's a lot of things that they're just hitting at us right now. And I think it's the perfect time and the perfect culmination of all my work to sort of come together with a new lens to support people in new ways.
My goodness, I mean, you are exactly one of us trying to juggle all the balls and just have your heart and try to protect your heart in the process of all of this. So I want to start because so many of us feel like we're facing burnout. But I want to, like make sure our language is consistent here. Because let's talk about what's the difference between stress between exhaustion and burnout? And what are those, you know, signs and symptoms that you can say, Okay, this is definitely burnout.
For sure. And, you know, let's start with validating however you feel is how you feel. And that's important. You know, I know, we can always talk about like putting labels on things. And sometimes that makes us feel like we're not alone. But I think the greatest piece within that is that when you know you're not alone, it's not like, Oh, so many people are suffering just like me, it means there's so many different ways that you can approach a solution. And I want to start with that tone. But for stress, I would say that's an experience, you know, when it comes down to it, it's psychological, it's physiological, it's a reaction, usually, to a trigger. So we're looking at events, circumstances, things that might be considered a threat or a challenge. And they're different levels to it can be acute, it could be episodic, you know, like, if you consistently have deadlines, maybe if you're in writing or journalism, you know, maybe there's something like that, or it could be chronic. So if you're living in poverty, if you are living in a place with a lot of crime, if you're living with discrimination of any of the isms, you know, I think that that relates to stress.
I just think whatever's happening right now in the world, there just seems to be so much vitriol, and it feels like we're fueled by our fear. And by our hate, and, and so many of us are trying to seek out the good and the joy and the hope. And it's really hard when you're working in a job where you are spinning so many plates all the time. So talk to me about some of the common causes of burnout, like both personal and in that professional context, what does it look like?
For sure. So I'd say the most common symptom that people also think about is exhaustion. But when you talk about the causes, it really is, you know, I think a bit in in three buckets that are six causes that are big contributing factors. So the first bucket, I think of workload and a lack of control. So right, like you don't have the autonomy that you need to have in order to make things happen. That happens a lot for those of us that care a lot, you know, we might have a lot of ideas, we might have a lot of things that we want to do. And maybe there's not a lot of understanding of how the pieces fit together. So that comes up a lot when they're also very siloed organizations. The bucket that I think of rewards and recognition, and fairness. So if you are working in a situation where you, you aren't recognized for the good work that's having the impact that is impacting your constituents, that can be a big symptom and a contributing cause of burnout in the workplace. If you don't see things as fair, maybe you give all the care to the people that you help. But then the employees of the organization themselves, maybe don't receive love care. And I've spoken to a lot of people and clients in, you know, past informational interviews where people share that a lot, they can see the integrity between what they're saying they want to do in the world, and what their experience is working for the organization. And the last piece that I think a piece that We Are For Good does very well to help combat burnout so far, and that is community and like having a sense of values alignment. So when you don't have that, that contributes to burnout, because when it comes down to it, burnout is is recognized by the World Health Organization, 2019 as a syndrome and like 20, you know, to really look at it being an occupational phenomenon, like this is it's work related. It's not a personal thing, but it could have personal impact on your life. And the biggest one, you know, goes from stress to exhaustion. And it's that extreme fatigue, it's the I need a vacation from my vacation. It means like, the weekends can't be long enough, the time away can't be long enough. Like I'm, I'm just tired. And I think you know, too. Well my folks that also have chronic illnesses or things like that. I think you know what that that means from a different lens. But that's that's a big part of burnout. But the other piece is also being loss of enthusiasm and your work, you know, and then ultimately inefficacy because, you know, no matter how much you care if you get burnt out, the work you're doing is not at the level that you would want it to be, or that you need it to be to achieve remission.
Can I just double click on one thing that you said, because I don't know, in 20 years of working in the sector, if I've ever heard this word used in the sector, which is fairness? I don't know that I have ever heard that word used in nonprofit, Jon, have you?
I mean, not openly. Not in the forefront?
Yes. And I think about that in the context of a sector where power imbalance is so extreme, between donors and fundraisers between EDs and frontline people, and that quality of fairness, I would think would have such a heavy effect, especially on those of us who are high achievers, those of us who will pour into ourselves last. And so I really value that you lifted that one up. And I think I'm gonna have to think a little bit more about it. Because I wonder how we're even socialize, it socializing it things that we think are unfair in our work, and how do we combat that? How do we lift it in a way where it builds conversation where it builds equity, I think this is going to expose much more than burnout, which is what I think I'm saying, and I really value that you're choosing these words, Diaris.
Of course, in those six contributing factors that I mentioned are from Christina Maslach's Burnout Inventory. So there's a ton of research. So if you're like, Hey, I know these things are contributing, I don't know where to start, and you kind of want to fall back on some research, that is one great way to do that. But the way that I like to think about fairness, the easy place to start, or what should be easy is transparency. You know, that's why bucket in it with rewards and recognition within those factors, because we need to see what what's happening, you know, your your budget kind of tells what your values are in terms of how you invest, but also how you're choosing to spend your time, or you're choosing to invest in talent. You know, 80% of organizations, nonprofits don't even have a retention strategy for their employees, right? And, you know, their stats, they're saying 45% of us that work for nonprofits are looking for new jobs by 2025. So we know that there's a problem. But we're just kind of shifting the people along and not addressing some of the root causes. And it's not just self care, you know, what I think we really need to do within this space, for the fairness is a community care, you know, it's kind of challenging some of this Western, pull yourself up by the bootstraps, we're all independent and doing that and really looking at we can be greater and stronger together. Like, how are we really organizing our work, organizing ideas, organizing the innovations we want to put out in the world to support people, so that we can do that, you know, otherwise, we could all just be consultants, we could all just choose to, you know, invest in our art or do these as hobbies, but we're choosing to make careers out of this. And so I think we have a responsibility to challenge the way that we're doing that, as a sector.
Yeah, you are going there, and we are here for it. And I would say that's definitely central to why we wanted to create the space for this week, because we do believe just the power of keeping people in these roles that are so important, but things just have to change. And so I wonder if we could talk about this burnout cycle, like how does it manifest? What are the common patterns that you've observed, as people kind of are, are inching toward it? Like, how can they start to identify this because there's so much power and understanding where you're at?
For sure. And my first step and sort of challenging burnout is really always a pulse check anyway, so like, how are you? How are you feeling? What's going on? How are you relating to others, etc. But I also have, in my Instagram highlights for InWellth, a series that I did, that were the 12 steps or stages of burnout. So I want to read those to you to make sure that you're getting each piece because I think the first time I created it, it was hard to recognize that some of these seem so not as threatening, you know, because the first step is excessive ambition and drive. Right? These are people that, all these high achievers, you know, you are focused on the mission, you know, you are looking at your workload, you're trying to expand it, you're leveraging tech you're, you know, spending the extra hours you're, you know, trying to find new ways to, to old problems. But yeah, it's one of the things that that creep. So number one is excessive ambition two is sort of like this working harder, you know, phase when you're just kind of digging deeper, three is neglecting needs. So we talk about how this relates to your personal life like, how, how long does it take for the laundry to get done? I know you can get in the washer, maybe in the dryer, but does it really take two weeks to put it away? You know, are you really doing some of the things that help you feel balanced, even within your home? Number four is displacement of conflict, right? Displacement of conflict, this is like when you are challenged, and you can't seem to figure out maybe you're going off on your partner, or, you know, maybe it's a little extra road rage, you know, maybe it's something like that. But these these steps are so small, it's so hard to kind of figure out when it's happening to you. That's why it's important to have these full steps. But number five, work only focus number six, denial, number seven, withdrawal, number eight, behavior changes, number nine, depersonalization, number 10, inner emptiness, or anxiety, number 11, depression, and finally, number 12 collapse. So at the end of all of this, you can see many ways that especially women are kind of just pushing through, right, like, there's all this data that says that we even recognize less pain in ourselves, doctors recognize less pain, there's intersectionality with that data as well. But like if you keep going along these paths, and it's not just you, right, because it's a community care issue. Our folks are going to collapse, you know, like complete exhaustion, like cannot get up, cannot do these things. And this doesn't mean everyone's going to experience all of these symptoms. But to know that that's what it could be for even some of us I think, gives us pause to think about what are we doing to be responsible for this? You know, what are we doing to care for the folks that are helping us achieve these this work? And how are we recognizing it in ourselves and and others?
I just think knowledge is power. And if I can be entirely vulnerable, Diaris, I mean, I have literally I have clicked through every one of those that you just named out in the last two months, for sure. Not to scare anybody, but to just be honest. And I think this is real. And I I so appreciate you just putting names on it, and cycling through each of them. Because friends, we have to take care of ourselves and something that you said, and I've actually I'll share something else very personal. I've been recently diagnosed with ADHD. And as a part of trying to understand that I had some brain mapping done, y'all if you should check out brain mapping, it is bananas. I felt like Rick Maraniss in Ghostbusters with like, the colander on his head with all the wires. It was amazing. It took like 10 minutes. But I literally found out that my brain has a propensity to self criticize, and to not think that it's good enough. And it's like these things are hard wired. And having this information gives us a plan. And I think Jon, you have taught me so beautifully the power in habits and understanding these rhythms understanding these precursors and these warning signals. I mean, we're looking for signals all the time. I don't think there's any sector that looks for signals better than ours. We're looking for engagement. We're looking for prospects, we're looking for donors, we're looking for rabid fans, are we doing a gut check on ourselves? Because I think this is so important. And so the question I have for you, Diaris, is why do people like Becky, maybe like you out there, find themselves stuck in this cycle, repeating the same patterns over and over in despite these efforts that we're making to try to break free from it, like, give us insight on that? And then tell us please, how can we learn to break free?
Yeah, so I think, you know, I mentioned that it's not just a self care issue. So thinking that you are going to think your way out of it, because maybe you have before. Maybe you've been able to manage that same kind of workload that you had before. Our bodies change, our minds change, situations change. They're compounding of stress impacts us, you know, how you're relating to political climate, how you're relating to things in the news. You are not the same person and that's okay. You know, and I want to welcome and lift up that there are people like me that want to hold this better vision for what you want for yourself and your life? Right? So when you're stuck in this cycle, it's so easy to be like, I've been here before, am I ever gonna get it, you know, like when it hits you with the pebble and then the rock and then the brick, and then it gets really hard, you know. But the important thing is, is to recognize is not just your problem, because it is a cultural issue for organizations and a systemic issue within nonprofits in helping professions as well. I think when it looks at what you're going to do individually, I think there's also a big mistake that folks make, and that's looking at time management versus energy management. And I think so much, so much of the productivity like gurus and all the things that you're going to read, you know, or often you're socialized and thinking, like, I just have to manage the 24 hours that I have today, you know, Beyonce has the same 24 hours as me, but money resources, you know, supportive communities help you get more out of those hours, right or help Beyonce, because I don't have those same means. But those kinds of resources, especially if they are a larger organization that maybe things could shift, you know, and we're accepting that things are the way that they are, because that's the way that they've been, but maybe you've grown a lot, or your organization has grown a lot in the last couple of years, and they're acting smaller than they are. So focusing on energy management will help you get to better time management, what that looks like, on the day to day is recognizing the rhythms that you have the you know, and it's not just designing your perfect day, like people will say, Oh, just work on your perfect days, but you might have rhythms within the month, you know, you might have rhythms where, you know, at the beginning of the month, you'd like to start really early, you know, maybe that's great for writing, or for me personally, design work is kind of like the only thing I can do at night, you know, like I can kind of get in the zone and lose myself within it. But like writing, I have to have sort of like a fresh mind. Or it's I try to arrange my day accordingly. But that's, that's a big part. And then focusing on what are you actually going to do to create the capacity care plan. And that's actually something that I'm working on. And that that is part of my work. And I'll be watching this fall, because a plan for me, the acronym is getting that pulse. You know, L is for leverage, A is the activator, and it's for network, because you cannot do this alone. You shouldn't want to, you know, and I don't want you to, and like I mentioned earlier that I was an overachiever. And somewhat I grew up in Oakland. And so I don't know if you could tell but I probably did well in school. But I wanted to make it look so easy. Like I didn't want anyone to ever see me with books. You know, like, if I was taking a bus, I didn't want people to have to see me studying, you know, there's so much that was carrying is that I had to make it look effortless. And then as I embrace more leadership positions, I've learned like, it's easier to relate to people when they see how you got there, especially when I was doing development work showing people here some of the questions that I asked or some of the resources that I went through, here's some of the same ways that you can maybe make this your own. And I think the more you can kind of see like, hey, if we're working in community, that means I actually could probably work on that thing I love more, you know, or maybe I can work on be a beginner in something that I've been interested in, because now I have a partner and a mentor in this and if I can check in with them, but I can learn how to use this technology differently. Maybe I can be an Excel ninja, you know, like maybe I can, you know, check in with Chat GPT to figure out how to, you know, maximize some of my skills. I think there's too much, it's just focusing on the individual, as soon as you can plug into communities like We Are For Good. And like whatever helps you feel safe to have these conversations, so that you can make real tangible steps to address your day to day.
Just loving where this conversation is going. I think I'm still like getting over your 12 steps of burnout, honestly, because by step three, it was like skipping a need for yourself or something like that. Right? And I'm like, how often am I hearing from people that don't even get up to take a lunch? You know, because our really connected overly scheduled lives like, we're not even feeding ourselves like we're on the path. All of us are on this path. So if we don't take action, we're going to end up at the end of this. And I'm trying to like really look at that analogy and think about what are the patterns, you know, what are their specific triggers or patterns that contribute to keeping us in the cycle? I wonder if you could walk us through a point out any of those.
Yeah, and I'll also point out that in my in Instagram highlights, I go through all the 12 steps, and I basically have a formula for it, where I'll say, this is what it feels like. And then I'll go over three things that you can actually do to address it. So it might be neglecting your needs, maybe for our neuro spicy community, it might be having body doubling and doing an errand date, you know, so maybe you go with a friend to the grocery store, you know, like, so that you can have these places that kind of connect more of these needs together. But yeah, I think it's, it is going to be a lot, you know, but the more the more important piece, and I think what challenges I've personally felt with trying to address some of these issues has been shame. You know, like, I shouldn't need this help. I shouldn't need, you know, someone to go to the grocery store for me, I shouldn't need, you know, to have such a hard time planning my meals or something like that. And if you can kind of figure out where you're spending your energy in shame, or you're spinning your wheels about decisions that you don't want to make? You can let go of them, you know, and maybe it's with therapists, maybe it's with a friend, maybe you scheduled, you know, you work on your weeks together on Sundays. But I think you need to address those things. And I would say those are the first things that I did try to let go of was like, Okay, what if I just say, I'm not going to cook, or what if I'm beating myself up, because I can never work out on Mondays. So if we just say, you don't work out on Mondays, and then you can be perfect, you know, the rest of the week, and there's air quotes , for folks, there's no perfect, but, you know, try to figure out where you can let things be easy. You know, and that's, that's the challenge, when I am stuck at is get a pen to paper or a color pencil or you know, like to do some color in this because you really need to break out of your day to day to, to think creatively, you know, about how are all the ways that I can solve my problem, because generally, especially if you're underpaid, and under-resourced in a organization, or maybe just in your household, and you don't have the kind of support that you need, you think the only solution is more money, you know, or that's the first solution. But really, it's a friend can help you with this, you can barter with this, you know, leveraging your skills can save you the time in something like this, you know, just telling yourself that, hey, they say this test, you know, is going to take this opportunity is going to take six hours, what if we just say I'm going to do it as fast as I can, and I'm gonna let it go. You know, and those things work. You know, and it's really to think about, you know, talk about habits, it's really the micro habits, like how do you interrupt, you know, these things, these cycles of self criticism, these cycles of neglecting your needs and set yourself up for the best case scenario. If you're not planning your meals, in the very least make sure the foods in the house and you know, maybe it's ordering a bunch of things that are almost ready to go. You know, if there's something that you don't neglect every day, if you take your dog out or something like Is there something you can do where you carry a plate of snacks, so it's always next to you when you're at your desk. But those are some of the things that I like to work on why I do the networking part of my capacity care plan, because the solutions can come from other people. You know, and when I talked about earlier, hey, there's, maybe it feels good to know you're not alone in this. The key piece there to remember is when you're not alone, there are so many paths to the other side. Because other people are trying things that you have not tried, you know, and then you can develop more nuanced, more confidence, you can release some of the shame because you know that you knew that you can do better and that people are rooting for you. And I think we need more of those spaces.
We want to be a space like that for you in Diaris I 100% want to know when that capacity care planning comes out, because I think it is so desperately needed in the sector. And I want to thank you for talking about shame, because I think that that's one of the underlying fuelers for us that we don't address. And I think a great activating point is what you just said is identifying it and figuring out a way to release it. And I am here to tell y'all as someone who holds on to crap really tightly because I'm a control freak, letting go of anything is incredibly hard, but the lightness and the freedom that comes with it. It is a gift to yourself. Jon, can you imagine if we treated ourselves like we do our are the top donor in our portfolio? How differently we would walk through this life? How much more differently we would walk through this work. And so I really appreciate this insight, Diaris, and I want to get into how do we recognize this burnout in ourself? How do we recognize it in others, because you don't want to call it out in this sort of aggressive fashion, you know, because you're talking about this community care aspect. So talk to us about how we can recognize early certain signs of burnout in ourselves. And what do you do when you see it and people that you love, and that you work with? We'd love to get your insights on that.
For sure. I think, you know, we should flip that question on its head, you know, and just accept that the ways that we've been going about things are building burnout. So I think what we need to be recognizing are the ways that are combating it. You know, we really need to recognize what are aspects or assets that we have an anti burnout culture, things like instituting pulse checks at beginning of meeting, where are you on a scale of one to five, like, you know, how much support do you need? Are you feeling, you know, over capacity, like, having like small things that you can do that really recognize that you're going in the right direction, because your matters, if we're looking for burnout, we're gonna find it everywhere we go. What we need to recognize is the ways that we're challenging it, and we need to celebrate that, like, loud and proud and cheering people on for making good decisions. And, you know, I mentioned in earlier in the episode that I had a medical challenge, or still have a medical challenge, but you know, there ways to it. And one of the things that I that was difficult for me is that I felt a big loss of control. You know, as you might imagine, I don't know how everyone's experience with medication is, but there could be interactions that can impact you, cognitively, behaviorally, all that and I felt like I didn't have as much control over what I wanted, I definitely did not have the capacity that I thought I had. And so I made a challenge for me, as my older sister was doing 75 hard, which is a big fitness challenge, you can look it up.
Oh my gosh, yeah. Jon did 75 hard.
I honestly go back to this a lot, too. Yeah, it's so good.
I did not do it. So let's, let's bring that up.
I love queso too much, I couldn't make it work.
My sister was doing it. And I was like, good for you, I will check in with you and cheer you on. But I was, you know, going through my challenge. So I was like, I want to do like 100 Easy. And I started tracking, like, Can I do two things a day. You know, that is like a positive jolt for my holistic self. You know, it could be as simple as a mindful glass of water, you know, having, have a tea for my coffee, you know, it could be going for a walk, it could be a cardio session, it could be reading. And I tracked this in 45 day sprints using an app called TickTick, I made this habit. And I looked at what are the things that I was doing. And like, because when you feel like you have no control, it was really helpful for me to celebrate the things that I did have control over. And there are things that you can do in 30 seconds, in a minute, in an hour. And I really looked at that because, you know, burnout, workload, loss of autonomy, you got to go back to where you feel the most empowered, the most energized. And if you can start identifying where you have your power, even on the smallest, you know, case, then you can take it to the next level, you know, and I could say like, Okay, well, this type of workout helped me feel my best, you know, so how do I do that? Or if I'm going into a big meeting, like it really helps for me to do you know, a particular kind of exercise or if I've had a stressful day, maybe yoga, if I'm angry, it's cardio which is high intensity, it's like, a hit, I don't get too angry. I was like, That would be good for my fitness. But it was like, let's, let's have the balance. But yeah, I think it's it's really looking at, you know, what's what's easy, you know, leaning into that all the way. Because those are where your answers are. And I think when you think about shame, when you think about how to recognize burnout in other people. I want you to recognize what's coming easy to folks or want you to recognize how energized the meeting is when people are in their element. You know, and how can create more of those moments? Because that is how you begin scaling your culture that is changing your well being as an organization.
Okay, positively obsessed with what you've just shared here, I just think there is, that is something that all of us can do. And there is so much power in keeping track of this thing. And I think you writing that down and being able to look back I think of Siri Lindley, she's on our ungettable get list, but I listened to a talk with her once it said stack your proof, because like in these hard moments, you need to go back and look and be like, no, okay, I have made all this progress. I have taken care of myself in all these ways, like in this example. So I'm just here for this. Thank you for walking us through this conversation. I feel like there's been so many resources of just of help of a lifeline that for someone listening today. So, you know, you've listened to our show, I appreciate how you've picked up on our values and threaded those to the conversation. And you know, we couldn't do this without talking about and celebrating the power of philanthropy. And and I want you to take us into one of the stories that have stuck with you. It could be something small or big, Diaris. But what is something that's, that's really resonated with you and your journey?
Yeah, so for me, it is the small, you know, it's the things that often go unnoticed, because it's always frequency over intensity. For me, like, those are things that are the most blatant, you know, the things that really emotionally resonate, for me are the things that you can recognize every day, you know. And so, I recently for I work for a nonprofit called the Management Leadership for Tomorrow. They do, they do work to advance racial equity. And I work in an alumni advancement role. And so recently, I created a campaign called MLT Dreams, to connect our alums dream for their own success for their own life, to the larger issue of racial equity, closing the wealth gap. And I really want to inspire lots of alumni to participate. But I just remember one conversation, in particular with an alum who was unemployed at the time. And, you know, you think about alumni giving participation, and they wanted so, so much to support, they're like, I just really don't know how I'm going to do it, because I'm just having a really hard time financially. And not only did they make the donation, you know, by our deadline, but they also went in recruited, you know, some peers that lived in their area, and they check back with me, you know, because there was no pressure, you know, off from from my end, you know, they they know the story, they know why we do the work that we do they know why we care about community, but to see people make us a philanthropic priority for them, you know, to give at any level really just touches my heart, you know, it's, you know, the kids that are giving you their quarter, you know, it's, you know, they're, it's just something about knowing that you can make other choices, and that you still choose to support this is just something that will always touch my heart, you know, especially when things are hard, especially when you're going out and you're inspiring other people, and you're just meeting people where they are. And that's so much what I love about philanthropy, like the actual root of the word is like, loving humankind, and what we're doing within community. And yeah, it's those stories that carry me forward.
The story of the tiniest gifts, compounding into just lessons and moments that we hold on to those never get old for me ever. And, and thank you for sharing that. And I can say that, for each of us out there who are on the front lines working to fundraise so hard for our organizations, Are we recognizing how people are giving us literally maybe their last dollar, you know, because they want to be a part of something that's bigger than themselves. What a gift that we get to work in this space. That's number one, but number two, or maybe 1B, take care of yourself so we can continue to work in this space. I am so proud of everyone who has tuned in to this conversation because it is an investment in yourself. And when you invest in yourself, and you pour back into yourself, it's going to be a gift that doesn't just rippling your job. It ripples to the people who love you, it ripples to the communities who support you. I mean, you even bring up the little fur babies that we all have like everybody gets joy and benefit from you being healthy and filled. And so I'm proud of you for doing that. So we're down to the one good thing Diaris, like how are you in the world are you going to distill something down to a one good thing today on this podcast? We're on the edge of our seats.
Well, I've kind of interweaved it a little bit. But the key piece for me is, you know, let life, let your work be an adventure. You know, let things be easy, you know, involve some play within your day, figure out how to do that is often as possible, because letting things be easy happens to be the hardest thing for so many of us, you know, and but when you let things be easy, you also figure out how to let them be easy for other people, you know, and how to let people shine in their light and how to really get to the core of community care, as part of your self care. So if you take nothing else, please figure out in your next email, in your next campaign in your next, you know, job posting, figure out how to let it be easy. And how to go through life with that sense of joy and play and wonder.
Oh, my gosh, Diaris is sliding that big, red easy button over to us we can like hit it. I mean, this conversation it seriously met us in the space that we're at, and just given us so much hope in brought us back to community, this powerful force that is here for the taking right here and right now. So how can folks connect with you? How can people get in community with you in the work that you're doing? Like point us to all the ways you show up online? I need to find you on Instagram for one thing, I mean holy cow.
No kidding, I think we're missing stuff over there.
For sure. For sure. So LinkedIn, you know, linkedin.com/in/diaris, I'm the only one you know, so far. First one to get it right. Although on Instagram is different. The best way to connect with me there is that InWellth, so InWellth is kind of like intentional wellbeing as well. So that's where the name came from. And so it's INWELLTH. So that is the way there and you can just send me a DM there so if you're having a particular challenge, or you have a question about a resource that I shared, or want me to double click on anything from today's conversation, I'm happy to shoot you over that resource. So I have things about the five ways that like team leaders are missing that really could get to the root of this. I have checklists. And then of course, I'm going to have my upcoming Capacity Care Retreat that will probably run once or twice before the end of the year. And then email, but LinkedIn and Instagram are the best ways. And I'll give you all my email, so that you can put it in the show notes.
It will all be in there. And I just think if you're someone who's putting, it's probably too late, but I'm gonna say it anyway, if you have not finalized your 2024 budget, and you are looking for ways to building healthier cultures to pour into your staff, I just think this community care and capacity care, retreat and learning is such a powerful tool, we definitely want to have insight on that and share it with our community. So Diaris, thank you for coming in. You totally exposed me and all of us in the greatest of ways. Also want to give a shout out to Management Leadership for Tomorrow for what they're doing and building up leaders and doing equity work. We are absolutely here for that in this community as well. So go check them out. Thank you, my friend and friends out there be well, we care about you. There's a lot of people who care about you the sector needs you take some time off, pour into yourself, you're worthy of it.
Thanks for joining us for these powerful discussions. If you'd like to dig deeper, you can find additional episodes and resources at we are for good.com/mentalhealth.
And these conversations continue over at the We Are For Good Community here. We'll double click on some of the topics and support each other in community. Come find us it's free at WeAre ForGoodCommunity.com.
