So this is the second talk on the on the topic of attunement. And in other words for this could be harmony, or balance. And, and it's the topic is a relationship to compassion and our connection to suffering and others and in ourselves and to simply just experience suffering in the world or in ourselves in the usual habit, habitual way of doing it might not be in harmony might not be attuned well. And it is probably a little bit of a challenge to think about being attuned to suffering. But it's having just the right level of connection, just a light right way of being present for it, that we're not letting it impact us negatively. It doesn't strike the windows in our hearts, so they've shatter. And it doesn't, we don't kind of closed down or resist what's happening. And so, in finding ourselves attuned, and I like the idea of thinking of it as kind of like tuning a guitar string, so that the different strings are attuned to each other, somehow they exist in the right relationship to each other. So that when we are encountering suffering, we can ask ourselves, how do we tune ourselves? How do we establish a useful way of being aware and present and an attitude towards this? That's here? And I think it's a nice principle to think that every encounter of of suffering is different, and requires a different attunement. What is this? And as soon as we start looking and thinking about attunement, then we're doing something very significant, which is we're not just simply a victim of suffering, passive recipient of it, but we're actually have some agency, part of us is not caught in the suffering, but he's engaged in looking what's the right balance here, how to be present. And so today's concept of attunement is being open, being open to suffering and in being open then also be open to compassion as a response. But to to, it involves being mindful, and moderate Montt monitoring ourselves of what the impact is on us, when we're in the presence of suffering, do we close down? Do we resist? Do we attack? Do we get swept up in our thoughts, and sometimes people get distracted and they go into fantasy, they start predicting the future. And, and to really understand, this is my common habits of when I'm uncomfortable when things are difficult for me. And then ask ourselves, How can I be I be attuned? And that's different than saying, How can I be present for it. Because sometimes we just present in a way, where the experience strikes us, it hits our wounds that hurt, it hits our, our resistance, it hits our judgmentalism, or self criticism, all kinds of things can just being present can be kind of a little bit and not taking into account what the experience the impact the experience has on us. And so we're monitoring ourselves, and saying how you know, given who I am, what's happening me with the situation? How can I be open to this? Open does not mean that we have you approve open does not mean you don't care. But open means that you're not at first. Responding to habitual patterns of resistance, openness kind of means non resistance. How can I not resist this suffering? Some of that has comes from the ability to be uncomfortable. There is a discomfort the stronger the suffering is, the more uncomfortable it is. And not a few people think they're responding compassionately to something but it's really they're trying to do make their own discomfort go away. And that's not really compassion. So to be open, to have no resistance, to have no need for oneself, to change what's going on, just to be open, it does not mean that we end up being passive. It means that this is a preparation for knowing what to do, and the doing and responding to compassion, we wait a while. And that while might just be a few seconds, it might be minutes, it might be longer depending on the context situation we're in. If we're reading about suffering in the news, and we're actually not present with someone who is suffering. And we feel kind of alarmed and kind of feel something strong. The less we're connected to people and more its ideas and stories, the less, the more likely, we're not open in a clear, free way. That might be more stories and opinions and judgments that come into play. And but what does it mean to be open, to be open and allow the experience to touch us and move through us every open to everything, how we are as a way of seeing clearly as a way of coming into some ability to be present without the reactivity that is so common when we're in the presence of suffering. So non resistance, openness, being open to the experience. And that's something that maybe it's not easy to understand how to do when the suffering is great. But you might look for small areas of things that are difficult or small sufferings that you're in, or some other people are in things that don't require immediate action. And take the time, maybe go sit down and meditate or take some time by yourself or just take the time to seek Okay, given this, let's not do anything right now, let's not come to any conclusions right now. Let me just be open to this experience. Let me be present for it. But open, like an open window and open door. So that you kind of let it is as if it just flowing right through you. As if you know, there's no stopping it no resistance, no picking it up, nothing to figure out nothing to have to think about in relationship to it, just be an open door to it. People might not have to know that you're doing this, because maybe other people will be confused by this attitude that you have. But I'd like to propose this as a phenomenally respectful of others in the suffering in the world. To first and foremost be able to meet it with non resistance, beat it without a non picking up pneus without getting involved, just kind of let it be and make room for it. Lots of room. And as we learn to do this, we learn to expand our capacity for discomfort, expand our capacity and make room for what's there. Not so that we can just suffer more. But so that we suffer less, and are available to see and understand what's happening in deeper ways. I have been in situations that there was some difficulty challenge going on suffering around me. And I've rushed to judgment. And sometimes I've rushed to action, only later to discover that what I did was not what was needed. If I take in time to be open, receptive present for it, not not resisting it not rushing to action, too. I would have seen what was needed. And I would have known what to do much better. So as the continuation of yesterday, which was why we're in in challenging times, in the presence of suffering and compassion is maybe the healthy response to the situation. First take times to think about it. Think well, and part of the thinking is to think how is the proper way to be attuned to this and might just being open here Oh When and, and, and non resisting might that have a role right now and probably has a role more often than not
doesn't mean that every single time you need to be have non resistance and be open. But it's part of the skill, it's part of the repertoire of things that we're trying to do, as we become attuned, coming into a certain kind of harmony with the suffering of the world, so that we're in a good position to respond compassionately. This is a stepping stone to compassionate action, not a rush to compassionate action. So I'd encourage you today to maybe it's a very private practice, no one who said no, you're doing it. But look for occasions where you can be present for something that's suffering something that's challenging people some way in which people are having difficulty. And see if you can kind of take a few moments a few minutes to just kind of not resist, it's almost like you open your heart wide open, spread your arms wide open, and say here, this can just come right through me. It's very different than saying here. This can land here and I can hold it for this exercise. Oh, hear that and it goes, this can just go right through and, and in that going through, maybe you'll come to a wiser better position to understand what yourself and what's happening. So thank you. And as we go through these acronyms touch for how to live in a tuned life. So thank you
