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Episode 130 - Complete | Otter.ai

Episode 130 - Complete

Vinny Welsby1h 4min

Speaker 1

00:00

You're listening to the face value podcast episode 130. Mistakes well meaning dieticians make that can hurt fat, folks, I'm your host, Vinnie Welsby. Let's do it. I'm Victoria Welsby TEDx speaker, Best Selling Author and fat activist. I have transformed my life from hating my body with desperately low self esteem to being a courageous and confident fierce fatty who loves every inch of this jelly. society teaches us living in a fat body is bad. But what if we spent less time, money and energy on the pursuit of thinness and instead focused on the things that actually matter? Like if pineapple on pizza should be outlawed? Or if the mullet was the greatest haircut of the 20th century? So how do you stop a negative beliefs about your fat body controlling your life? It's the first fatty podcast let's begin

Speaker 1

01:19

Bonjour, hello. How are you? Welcome to this episode, how's life? I've got 99 problems and diarrhea. All of them. Yay, me. IBS is fun. Do you have IBS? Oh, wow. Do you ever find yourself when you've got a turtle head? Your bum is like, I need to poo within the next three seconds or I'm gonna shoot yourself that instead of going immediately to the toilet, your first reaction is I must have my phone so that the 13 seconds that I'm doing a poo is not without entertainment. Have you noticed that? Do you do that? Is that just me? Who's Who's risking risking my underpants because I can't possibly do a shit without scrolling. Instagram? Is it just me? No, I think you do that too. I think we all do that do that. Yeah, although you're not everyone's gonna have IB Yes. And so you know if you've got IBS D then you know that we're playing with fire there. I feel like with IBS I've got I've ever watched a Kill Bill Quinton Tarantino movie from like 2001 i Kill Bill kibble actually is about to kill to these my top 10 favorite films those those films anyway. In the bride who is Uma Thurman, she kills one of the characters don't worry, no spoilers, she kills one of the character the whole fail is the whole film is killing everyone, right? So she kills someone with the Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique. And so she'd like to hit certain points in the body. And then the person stands up. And they, they they can take five steps or 10 steps or something. And then the heart will explode. And that feels like what IBS is but instead of your heart exploding your asshole exploding, so so it's like the Five Point Palm Exploding asked technique is what IBS is. And that's like literally how long you've got right? Like sometimes not always, sometimes for me, it's like, oh, hello poo. And yeah, you've got like that five steps you got that five steps to take before your asshole explodes so it just might you know, Kill Bill just reminds me of that just realized that. Um, yeah, so fun times. Anyway, today we're talking about something that I was talking about out on Instagram. While I was while I've been sitting on the toilet on the Instagrams been talking about there's something I noticed is that some dieticians that I follow, share what I eat in a day posts. That might mean this is like this is not new. This is you know, people do it all the time. Right. And they're fat positive, intuitive eating health, every size, type dieticians and so they're not like, you know, that hating dieticians and something that I recommend to dietitians, nutritionists, anyone doing this type of work? When I do consulting with them is to not do what I in a day posts and, and I realized, you know what I need to make a resource I'm going to so North America and I said resource economic results. I'm gonna make a training for dietitian so we can go over all of these things I want to talk about them and see, you know, hey if you are a dietitian, nutritionists, health coach or anything like that, then yeah, like, listen up, tune in and even if you're not, and you're just curious about, you know, why, why am I learning intuitive eating and something doesn't feel right, because I'm following these people. And it just feels a bit EQ. And I don't know why this could be why the different not just this one thing, but the different things and I asked my audience, what do you think? And they said, Oh, we've got opinions. And so I just wanted to share what they have got to say, and do like a case study.

Speaker 1

06:05

Without naming names, about what is who, you know, someone doing it, doing it, doing it gray, someone doing it not so great. And this is not meaning to be kind of like, I know everything and you Vogue in ding dongs out there just being so horrible to fat people. And you're just so mean and horrible, and you need to go away and die or something. Because listen, I don't know, I barely have my shit together. And there's so many different things, right? There's so many different things. And if we are just moving to a war, if we move, taking a few steps, doing a few things which support people a little bit better. I think that could be really helpful. And the reason why I titled the episode, mistakes well meaning dieticians make because I'm talking about I'm talking to and about people who are like, I care about fat people. I don't want to hurt fat people. I'm, you know, they're there. They're part of my audience. They're my clients and I want to do right by them. And I think I am and and maybe there maybe there's some areas where there can be tweaks made to make the experience of interacting with a thin dietitian. Better for fat folks. So if you are doing anything, like what I'm going to talk about in the episode doesn't make you a giant dickhead. Okay? Makes you someone who has been educated and living in a very weight centric world, you know, I mean, if you're a dietitian and a nutritionist anytime anyone who's who is in that world of food, I mean, shit, there's no way that you could have avoided fat phobic bullshit. So you, if you are already doing intuitive eating and our anti diet, then you're already like, a gajillion light years ahead of most of your colleagues. Right. So that's pretty, pretty, pretty cool. If you asked me, you know, just being in this world being in like anti diet, world, fat positivity world, most people aren't and to get here is a journey. So anyway, okay, so I asked my people, I said, Hey, folks, question, what do you think often, dietitians who are haze aligned fat positive or intuitive eating people? What do you think when they post what I eat in a day? Video? And so what I eat in a Day video is, is very diet culture II? Well, it's I mean, it's something that that I mean, comes from diet culture, right? It's kind of started with people on diets who were like, This is what I eat to be thin, this is what I eat to be to have a six pack, which is not great, right? Because everyone could be in the exact same thing. And everyone's still be different sizes. Everyone could be exercising the exact same way and everyone would be still be different sizes.

Speaker 1

09:27

And a lot of times when it's shared from the diet type people, it's kind of like, Oh, here's what I eat in a day. You know, my first meal is like, I suck the juice from a cucumber and my second meal is I rub some dust into my eyeballs. And my third meal is I snort some cayenne pepper, you know, like, that's, that's what it's kind of like, and so, anti diet dietitians or intuitive eating dietitians. And I'm gonna I'm just gonna say dietitians, shorthand for because you know, most most People were doing this work are dieticians but they could be, you could be a nutritionist or some other type of coach or professional who interact with fat people in this way. So I'm just going to use shorthand of dietitians. So many anti dietitians have taken that trend from the diet folks and have done it in a, quote, intuitive eating way to say, this is what an intuitive eater into intuitive eater eats in a day. And guess what, I made a video like that, like, maybe four years ago, because this is the reasoning in my, what my brain was thinking was that some people just don't know what an intuitive eater eats. And they think that an intuitive eater eats, like, either nothing like diet food, or they eat only, quote, unhealthy food. And so my thinking behind making that video of what what do I eat in a day is just being like, whatever, you know, that was my thinking behind it just to be like, whatever. And it's like, it's not a big deal. Like, I just don't think about food that much. But you know, this is kind of like what I eat, and I just did it, you know, like, what happened breakfast and what happened lunch or whatever. And it just wasn't a big deal. is what I was thinking in my mind. But actually, in the year since I made that that very short video that maybe four people watched, thank God is that it's actually can be very, very harmful. And I've not I've started I mean, I've worked that out after and, and actually I was triggered by one thing, dietitian video of what I eat in a day. And I saw it and I was like, Oh God, will she eat this. She eats this and she's meant to be she's meant to have food freedom. And she's eating a salad. She's eating a salad or whatever. I can't remember what it was. But it wasn't something. It was an oh, look, this is that dietician and she's eating 17 Doughnuts for breakfast. And at lunch, she's having whatever, you know, something that we would we would presume isn't healthy, right? It wasn't that because and that's why that that triggered me and just like an FYI. Even though I do this work, I still have to be very cognizant of my brain right of Oh shit, like, Oh, my goodness, you know, something else has gone on maybe and I've been you know, I've had a bad day or whatever. And then I see this and, oh, you know, someone's ghosted me who I thought was my friend and, and then I see a dietitian saying, you know, like, oh, I eat salad 17 times a day, and then I'll be like, oh, you know, something like pop up in my brain. And luckily, because because I've worked so hard at protecting my brain from that stuff is not very often and so when it does happen, I'm like, Ooh, interesting. Let's think about it. And it made me think like, Yes, I think that's many other people's experience. But let's just double check. And so I asked everyone and this is what we've got. I'm not gonna read all the responses because you law we're wanting to give you a Telhami or everything. We got hundreds of responses. And so people said not a fan my eating disorder makes makes me want to model my eating out of them but only because they're thin. Someone else says they're there to edited There's no way that's what they're actually eating and it serves no purpose. No purse, no purpose. Someone else says, fuck you and scroll someone else's yuck. They make me feel anxious. Don't like it. It's harmful. Dieticians should know that everyone has different food needs always make me feel guilty like they don't quite get it. It triggers me so I scroll past them. That's still something I haven't been able to therapy away. Not a fan of anyone posting this type of content nutritionist or not thin or not. Don't love it, especially because it's what I expect it to be. Barely anything. Don't like these videos that don't like these kinds of videos makes me compare eat my eating pattern was theirs for

Speaker 1

14:24

note loads of us know, unfollow that shit. What's the point they're trying to get across here? It implies if I ate what they do, I would be as soon as they are but we all know that's bullshit. Someone else says most most dieticians I know don't do this because they know the harm it can do. It reminds me of white privilege. Hey, look at what I enjoy. And you can can do as long as you're like me. And that's the other thing. Someone else here says this and I'll just get to this point here. Someone says it's triggering fat phobic. I want the them to keep doing it though, helps me know what who not to follow slash watch. Interesting. Yeah, this person saying It's fat phobic is that because of their thin privilege, they're able to either say, Oh, this is what I eat in a day. And it's you know, some of it contains, quote, healthy food. And even if they did say, here's what I eat in a day, I eat food like normal people, normal people I eat, you know, I don't know, Cheetos, whatever. And either way, they're gonna get praise, because, of course, they're thin, they eat salads. Of course they do. That's how they got thin. Or they're going to have people being like, Oh, wow, look at you, you doing that eating a Cheeto. And if a fat person did that, they would get just torn apart, it's a privilege to be able to eat on on the internet, you know, it's not even on the internet in front of people, depending on your size, because people have opinions if you have a big body, and if you have a bigger body, if you are a larger fat person, they are gonna be sharing those opinions with you because it is deeply offensive to see a fat person eating food. And so unless that thin dietician is acknowledging that holy shit by even doing this, this is a massive act of privilege. And I'm here eating quote, an unhealthy food quotes. No food is unhealthy, blah, blah, blah. I'm here eating an unhealthy food. And I'm getting celebrated for it. Or I'm causing harm by suggesting suggesting that if you're an intuitive eater, you should be eating. XYZ. But that's our post this morning of it was everything that I keep in is things I keep handy as an intuitive eating dietitian. And I was like, oh, like, get the fuck out. The things I keep handy. Three of them was homemade baked goods. And so there's like the first one was like, home baked zucchini brownie. And then, you know, the next one home Bates, apricot SCON. With a dusting of I was like, Who the fuck are these? Who's baking? I know, people bakes, you know, it exists. But if there's no, it's unrealistic, to think people are gonna have on hand the things and the things that they had on hand were the ones that were packaged goods were fucking expensive as shit. And you know, if it was things that I have on hand as a dietician, a packet of 12 cents noodles a can of chickpeas to add protein, you know, things like that, that might be appropriate, because then it's like, Well, can I get a 12? Duck? 12 cents pack of noodles? Yeah. That's probably in most people's reach. And then like, you know, they might say, Okay, how I make this even more nutritious on a budget is I would add protein or I would add fat or whatever, you know, I would add fiber, whatever. Right. And so sharing these, you know, it's, it's just oozing all types of privilege. You know, health is fatphobia class privilege. Time privilege. I am a single person. I don't have any anyone apart from Google the dog. Depending on me I don't have children, right. I know why am I baking shit? I don't have the time. I've got me some Netflix to watch. Okay. And I don't want to be I want to I want to feel like I'm less than I'm because I'm not baking stuff. Anytime I just feel like any type of food talking about food is just very slippery slope. And even me saying even me saying, oh, you know, it might be okay if they were eating 17 doughnuts in the moment in the in the in the morning? Is it me reinforcing the idea that doughnuts are perceived as not healthy. You know, I'm reinforcing negative beliefs about food because I'm saying blah, blah, blah. I'm giving an example.

Speaker 1

19:46

I should have just said, you know, something that we perceive as unhealthy because you might not perceive donuts as unhealthy. Like I would use an example of donuts because I think of Homer Simpson, right? Me personally, I couldn't take a leave doughnuts. And so if I had never you heard the idea that doughnuts were unhealthy from the symptoms from when I was a kid. And all the other things I've been told are unhealthy. I would never have perceived them as unhealthy. I just perceived them as something like, not really bothered about, you know, and it wouldn't be a thing in my mind. I wouldn't be talking about the doughnuts. Anyway. Okay, so someone says that was that was out of the hundreds of responses. There was one person who someone here says it's okay. And someone else says, I like it when someone else does it. This, they said this one count. And someone else said, unless it says, whatever I want, I'm not here for it. So I think if someone said, Oh, I'm, I'm a dietician, here's what I ate in a day, and they were like, Psych, eight, whatever the fuck I want and what I eat. You don't need to know because it's gonna affect you. If I tell you what I eat, because you're looking to me, and you're looking to my body. And I know it's not helpful. Like, if they did a record scratch, like I'm joking, I'm not going to tell you what I eat in a day because it's not helpful. Yes, yes. Yes. Yes. And so then I asked the question, what do I Intuitive Eating health, every size, fat positive aligned, dieticians, nutritionists, etc, do that, all the other things that they do that don't make you feel good. And so here are some of the responses that we've got around that. If they're thin, they should think twice before making most of their contents, content videos about of of them. Yeah. And so this is this is important, because if you are fitting, people will naturally even if you're thin, and you're like, Listen, my body has got nothing to do with what I eat. It's genetics, I could eat XYZ. And I could never exercise and I could blah, blah, blah, I will still be thin. Even if there is that big caveat. Just existing in a smaller body in a profession, like being a dietitian, means that people will be drawn to you will be influenced by you. And because of fat phobia, you will have more followers, you'll be more have more people interested in working with you, you will be seen as an expert because of your body size. And so we want to mitigate that as much as possible. And so as an example, Lauren, cardiac Cadillac, feelgood dietitian on Instagram, as an example, if you see her Instagram profile, almost all of the videos that she has, or have her have her face right. And not have her body. I don't know if that's a conscious thing on Lauren's part, but I'm guessing it probably is. Or maybe not, who knows? Who knows? But I mean, that's a way that you can do it where you're not like, Oh, here's my body and look how small I am. And if you work with me, then you're gonna get small, even if you're not saying that. That is what some people will be taking from it, right. Okay, so other comments for getting that fat people aren't monolithic, and we all have different experiences. Yeah. Forgetting to take into account the lived experiences of individual fat persons, yeah. Be majority white. Yeah. Well, I mean, I mean, I guess you know, with as we know, most dieticians are thin white, blond. I mean, coming from someone who is white and blonde, although fat. So, I guess if you're surrounding yourself by I mean, you can't change, you can't change who you are as a person in that regard. But you can change who you listen to, you can change who you promote, you can make sure that you are as an example, if you were asked to speak or asked to be on someone's podcast, looking at who else are asking who else is going to be involved and if it's a bunch of other thin, white, able, bodied, neurotypical straight, etc, etc. Dieticians maybe saying, oh, you know, actually I prefer it. If we had a mix of my role. My rule is minimum 50% of people who are different from me. And if that's not the case, then I can't get involved in like a project or summit or whatever. And I've turned down many things because

Speaker 1

24:48

people have come to me because they've just got no intention of getting, you know, people of color or or Oh, or anyone out anyone else who's not, you know, white involved. And so using that, that privilege and educating people if if you're invited to do things, um, okay, selfies that look like they are candid, but are using poses that make them look thinner or curvier. Yeah, interesting. Someone says not only nutritionally. But this kind of video makes makes people financially uncomfortable to, for example, in my country, avocados, quinoa and cherry tomatoes aren't cheap. Mm hmm. Yeah. Absolutely. Someone else says, It feels condescending when someone without my knowledge, lived experience. Missing the end of that.

Unknown Speaker

25:48

I guess it's a two parter. It just feels condescending as well, is what this person said. Honestly, discussing weight at all feels like a slap in the face since they never deal with it. Yeah, I

Speaker 1

26:00

think so I think what this person is saying, and I mean, I'm just not absolutely sure. But a lot of people are saying that. They talk about weight. And say, either, don't worry about weight right now, you know, don't worry about putting on weight. And who cares if you put on weight. And I think that's what this person is talking about, like, weight, don't worry, if you put on weight, like who cares that type of thing will for a lot of fat people putting on weight can mean the difference between being able to buy clothes for your body. You know, if you go from from one size to another, it could be that you are sized out of buying clothes in person, or you're sized out of even the highest plus size brands online and have to get custom clothing. It could be that you are denied many, many, many medical procedures. Things like IVF, life changing life changing life saving, saving surgeries, things like gender confirmation surgeries, it means that you are going to be experiencing a shit ton more marginalization, depending on your size. So to not worry about putting on weight is I understand it right? I totally, I totally get it. I get it like it's kind of like but let's put it on the back burner and just let's think about healing our relationship with food. But healing our relationship with food does mean that you're probably not eating enough food and you're probably going to eat more food. And so if someone is eating more food, that they're probably going to be very anxious about the idea that they could put on weight whether they do or don't or stay the same. We don't know. But and that's a very real anxiety for people who are fat and depending on how fat someone is, it could be devastating to their quality of life and their experience in the world. It could be sometimes it might be better for someone who has fat to diet, because the the awfulness from weight stigma outweighs the awfulness from dieting and weight cycling. Because at least then people will be off their backs. At least then their family and friends are going to be like good for them, they're finally doing something about that, that that weight of theirs and, you know, and so it might not always be the experience, even though of course I am anti diet is very complicated and very painful and could lead to death. Being fatter because of how society treats fat folks, someone says get defensive when they say get defensive when we say they can't understand certain things with that lived experience. Yeah. And inability to embrace curiosity and a willingness to make mistakes in order to learn things. It's a good thing just for everyone to have right. Focusing on recovering from anorexia and leaving out all the other EDS Yeah, and that's actually that's, that's a great point. And that's a hierarchy we see in eating disorder treatment is that anorexia is seen as kind of like the quote best one because it's like the most runo seen as like, oh, that person's really struggled because we have a visual representation in their body sometimes of how they might have struggled not which is forgetting about most anorexic people are a typical anorexic people, which means anorexic people who are not Do not have a low body weight, which is, you know, it's an IT and we're thinking about binge eating disorder is the most common and seeing how we can be a lot more compassionate towards people who live with anorexia versus people with living with BPD binge eating disorder, because Oh, Edie or they're just greedy. Oh, they're they're fat people you know. And you can have the IDI and Bs small person as well. But, yeah, recovering, focusing on anorexia, which is not the most common. EDI. Okay. They say to tell me to accept my body as it is. It would sound better coming from someone who looks like me. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, it's very easy to say Oh, accepting of your body if you live in a body that society doesn't torment you for living in

Speaker 1

31:00

show clothes, particularly workout clothes without giving the size range available, always disappointed. Oh my god, yes, this. Listen, if you're straight size, and you share any size you are, and you share clothes, please put the size range underneath even if the size your size range isn't inclusive. And what I say by inclusive, inclusive is goes up to custom sizes. And that's, that's the biggest pet peeve of like, not the biggest, a big pet peeve of mine is when it's when like an influence is like, I'm like, I'm inclusive size range, and you're like fuck yeah, as a fact. You're like, oh, gas. I want to wear some of this. And then you go and see what inclusive means. And inclusive means like to x, and you're like, What the fuck? WILL FUCKING inclusive is inclusive of people up to two eggs? What about the rest of them? We will free X and above all fuck you. You You weren't included. You are not included in this party? Yeah, so honest, honestly. It's it's like, it's, it's, it's just a is it a trope now? It's just so cliche every time. Just say what the size range is. Because you know, people are going getting excited thinking, I want to look like that person. I want to get that outfit and go in and finding, oh, it only comes in size, blah, blah, blah. Not my size. And it's sad, right? Because guess what, you know, you want to buy that shirt. And so if you have the thing below saying oh, by the way comes in sizes extra small to large, then you can really Aha. Then you know as well. It might help people realize how many clothing lines of deeply and inclusive. Okay, let's see what else people are saying. Get angry when someone loses weight like Adele. The whole point is not to comment on anyone. Wait. Yeah. What I wonder if I would be surprised if I'm bet you they have someone has a thin a thin, thin person has commented on Adele's way. I mean, yeah, I mean, yes. I believe I'm even asking myself that question. Has a thin person commented on Adele's way. I mean, come on this seriously, sometimes I'm living my own fun fantasy world where everyone's fat positive, right? Yes, is the answer. Yes, yes. Yes. But I don't think I don't think dietician like I don't think a fat positive dietitian would or an intuitive eating dietician would like Mr. happened, it must have happened, right? But I that would be really fucking shit, wouldn't it? Yeah. Even like, you know, like, because some people were asking me Oh, Vinny, what's your take on? Release those new clothing line or blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, You know what, going, you know, here's what black folks are saying. Because it's like, why it's not it's not my place to talk about that as a white person. It's not my place to criticize and critique people who I don't share identities with in regards to they have a much nicer entity that I don't have. It's just not my place. You know, like the whole wheel Smith thing. I know it's not my place. You know, we've got we've got enough white opinions on what black people shouldn't shouldn't be doing. So act as if they experience is universal. So I were the experiences universal also thinking about you know, a big thing that I see is able Islam is not considering like with the not being. Yeah, not considering other people's lived experiences and how everyone can do this this type of workout or everyone is able bodied or everyone is pursuing health or everyone, you know. Yeah. When they bring up diabetes, it's a valid health concern, but eating sugar doesn't equal diabetes. Yeah, well, yeah, I mean, like when I'm saying, Oh, I'm thinking, Whoa, who's talking about diabetes? I'm talking about how it's okay. They gained a little weight, but still so significantly smaller than me. So is my weight. Okay? Because it's, it's so much more. Yeah, yeah. Someone saying posting their exercise routines. Yeah, I don't want to see that. Talk about anything being easy or fail to recognize ableism.

Speaker 1

35:59

Full body camera angles dancing while eating things that would invite body shaming if I did them. Yes. Our fat person dancing and eating. I mean, that's just like a recipe for trolls to make a videos about. But what if a thin person does it that it's like yes, gah, you go Oh. When they preach self love, instead of addressing the systemic abuse that's going on toxic positivity. Yes. Yeah. And I think it's important to, to I mean, for me, I'm always think it's important to point out that things can be easier if you are not hating your body. But the reason the root of it all. The reason why we hate our body, is because of when the way society tells us that fat bodies are horrible because of and where does that come from? Racism, you know, and it's kind of like, well, you live in my body will help might make make will, will make living in a fat body easier in regards to what I'm doing to myself the shit that I'm saying to myself, it will not make other people suddenly be like, Oh my God, you like being fat? Okay, well, I like you, too, if they previously didn't like you, you know. And as well, it's so easy to say. Love yourself when you're in a body where, you know, 99% of the population is like, Yeah, I mean, that is a body that to love. That is a lovable body show their treat that they're eating intuitively and in it's two bytes of dark chocolate. And dark chocolate. So why hanes and dark chocolate? Look at me I'm so greedy. Talk about anything being easy. Oh, did that one posting that? We did that one? Sorry. I'm repeating myself. They don't acknowledge their thin privilege often enough. It should be in every post. Yeah. Yeah. That's a great, that's a great one. It should be in every post. Yeah, kind of like oh, it's it's easier for me to say this because of my my thin privilege and and allow that sort of thing privilege is because you know what, I bet you a lot of times if a thin dietitians spoke about thin privilege, they are going to have so many people in their comments being like, well, thin privilege isn't real because I was shamed for being thin one time and that hurt my feelings and that's where they could do some really good work and explain what the privilege is and how it's not the same as having hurt feelings which you know, a lot all of us experience shit in our life and hurt feelings. It's a systemic interpersonal intrapersonal institutional issue and that's not the same as someone skinny shaming someone which is by the way in case that's not obvious is wrong. But it's not the same. Um, someone else I hate it when they talk about how it's okay to gain weight and they went from a size two to a four yeah yeah, I don't really know what that is size tip for when is the size not being British? Really like a size six I think in British size six to a size eight. Yeah. Okay, so yeah, someone else says it's fine. Say say it's fine to go get to gain weight without recognize increased stigma and hardship yet, assume Edie recovery equals a few. Plus a few pounds versus have very thin body becoming fat and how that feels. Yeah. So this person is saying that Edie recovery could look like going from being a thin person to a fat person versus going from a thin person to a slightly bigger thin person. They don't understand the steep price of food piece X is accessibility for larger folks. Yeah. Ignoring fat phobia that you can just say no to being weighed as if that solves a problem. Yes. Yes. Honestly, D, saying it's okay to say no to being weighed is not wrong advice, right? It's not, it's not incorrect. And it has to be kind of with an asterix, especially if you are a straight size person has to be with an asterix all of

Speaker 1

40:35

that might not be possible for you, you might have to nod and agree to the doctor, in order to get care, you might have to get weighed because you're going to be denied treatment. If you don't, you might have to pursue weight loss, even though you know, it's bullshit, because you will gonna be denied lifesaving treatment if you don't. And so, you know, for a straight size person to say, I'm sorry, I don't want to get get weighed. I mean, that's difficult, right? It's difficult, it's not not to say that that's not difficult, but for a fat person to do it. Well, clearly, we can see with our eyeballs that you're fat, therefore, we need to know how fat you are and where you are on the BMI scale. So that we can tell you to lose weight and how much weight to lose, because that is the only reason why you would need to be at the doctor's is to be told to lose weight. And so the amount of courage that takes you even for like, even for me, you know, me, I do this work. And also, I have the privilege of have been going going gone to therapy for like the last 10 years. And working on confidence and speaking up and all that type of stuff than last time when I went to the the doctors and the person was like, Okay, you can step on the scales. And I said, No, thank you. And they said, we need it for the chart. And I said, No, thank you. My heart was beating out of my chest. Even though outside I was calm. I was it was scary as fuck. And I do this for a job. How is that? You know, for someone who is new to this. And even if I wasn't if I even if I was, you know, Uber, anyone is Uber confident like stands up for themselves. That doesn't mean that I still or anyone still would not have experienced the consequences for them standing up for themselves the consequences being denied care, the consequences as being one of those fat people who is so horrible and lazy and non compliant. Ha they wouldn't even get on the scales for me what a fucking troublemaker. So saying, oh, yeah, just don't get weighed. It's not wrong, but it needs a big kind of like, but you might not be able to say that for many different reasons. This thing where they show their, quote, bloated body after eating and tell us not to be ashamed of it. Yeah. Yeah. Like there's a whole there's a whole trend of like, oh, you're not fat, you just are bloated? Because like, what thin folks still benefit from from privilege yet preach about how fat people should love themselves. Comparing before and after post either where they become fat fatter or happen to lose weight. Yeah, any before and after posts. Even if it was before I used to be thin. Now I'm fat and happy. It's body comparison. We just don't need it. Right? Someone is saying assuming fresh fruit and other items that are affordable to all. Someone else says, Just tell your doctor, you don't want to be weighed as if that fixes fat phobic barriers to care. Yeah. And even if we're like the not wanting to get weighed thing, even if that's not a problem and you don't get weighed. That doesn't mean that you're when you get your blood pressure taken. It's going to be with the right size, blood pressure cuff. That doesn't mean that the CT scan is going to fit your body. That doesn't mean that you're going to given be given the correct size needle when you're getting your next COVID shot. right even if you do not get weighed, you're still going to experience barriers. Someone else says celebrating that wobbly bits rolls cellulite when they have zero lived experience in a larger body. Yeah. Oh, that's another one that just really gets on my tits is the oh I'm so Julius even though I'm so I'm so wobbly. And it's like you're in a string size body. I mean, everyone will rejoice if I looked like you. And that's not to say that people who were straight sides don't have problems but you know, it's kind of like oh, I think braces body. Oh, because I'm presuming this body is fucking just Schools do, because I used to not have cellulite, right. Right. Someone says never connecting diet culture to racism never promoting fat, black and brown experts. Yes. Yes, yes. Yes. And I think that's I see a lot, a lot a lot. People don't want to talk about the political but it's impossible, especially if you are an anti diet, intuitive eating fat positive dietitian, anything, you can not not talk about the politics by not talking about the politics, your

Speaker 1

45:37

race raising, like 90% of this work, you know, if you have to kind of really try, right it's, it's an effort to not put in that stuff. You know, because it's such a big part of the work we do. Why why are we why? Why is this happening? Why do we feel like this? Why do we treat bodies like that? And and, and here's the thing is a lot of people do they talk about only sexism? Only the patriarchy, only beauty ideals, right? And they don't talk about where do these beauty ideals come from? And they don't talk about fat phobia then I'd say it's because we fucking hate fat bodies. The reason why you're listening to me is because I have a thin body and if that makes you feel uncomfortable, then I encourage you to go and learn from this person and this person and this person who was fat who was black or was

Speaker 1

46:47

this someone else says they use the O word. That for me is like thickening Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee is someone use the O word that's like basic 101 like you cannot use any Oh words or normal way or health healthy way or even with someone uses the word healthy a lot or health or wellness. They're all like wellness and health that like Amber Alert. Oh words. That's fucking good. Leave unless they are saying, Oh, by the way, I'm quoting this study. And in a study they use the Oh words, but I'm going to censor them out and give a trigger warning that they're going to use your words or you know, say quote unquote, oh word. Someone else says post pictures of themselves with cans of frosting being like, see how uninhibited I am? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because they're inhibited because they have a small body. Because if they did that, and they were fat, they'd see how he putted they are, is that a word? headbutted an inhibited and inhibited inhibited? In fucking googling That shit is HIPAA did a word uninhibited here bigoted. Oh, inhibit headbutted, uninhibited. Prohibit no because it comes from prohibits and inhibit. So habited or hang on habited free from traditional social or moral constraints vernacular uninhibited, is grammatically incorrect, as it contains a double negative. Oh, but this is coming from Urban Dictionary So who the fuck knows if that's true? True, true. uninhibited. A double double negative Merriam Webster Anyway, whatever normal amount of fucking words here. Just thought about talking about the dictionary. Someone else says wish they collaborated, collaborated, collaborate, collaborate, collaborate, collaborate, collaborated? What's the hard more with fat folks acknowledged privilege before talking about fat liberation, etc. Don't think they're being mean. They just they just just they just want them to be more aware. Yeah. Yes, yeah. And I don't I don't do I don't think like, I don't think many people in the world are like, rubbing their hands together being like, wow, I'm gonna fuck with these people. I think most people, especially people who were doing this type of work who were trying to be better just don't know, because it's not their lived experience. You know? Unless someone says hey, this isn't feel good for me. And they might not be in the position to even want to listen, but you know, If someone's done work to be able to listen to when criticism happens. They might be able to hear it. I mean, it's just hard, right? It's hard. And if you're if you are a dietician, and you're listening to this, and you're like, Oh, Holy fucking shit. I do everything. I do all of those things. Oh my god, I'm a piece of shit. I just need to go away and die. No, no, don't listen. Listen, if I went, I don't even want to think about this. If I went back to my Instagram, like six years ago, five years ago, two months ago on there, that I be like, Oh, God, what I fucking Bella. And I was, Oh, I really thought I knew stuff stuff. And I knew nothing earn. And that's cool. That's cool that I can say that. Because imagine if you look back at your shit, and you're like, Oh, my shit don't stink. Oh, I was so clever then. And I'm so clever. No.

Speaker 1

51:15

Yeah, and it might make you feel overwhelmed or like, oh, shit, all I need to change everything. That is that wanting to change everything immediately. That's a manifestation of white supremacist culture. These things take time, okay? And you don't want to get burnt out with being like, well, I need to if I can delete my Instagram, and I need to log in, you know, go away and not be part of this community because I am thin and I'm white. And Birla, no, just take steps to to make tweaks and to make long term commitment to keep educating yourself. And that's the same with me, right? Like, sometimes I feel so overwhelmed with how much I don't know. And just thinking, Oh, Jesus Christ, I'm hurting so many people all the time, because I don't know about stuff that I don't know. I don't know about you know, you know, I don't know if you know what I'm talking about. You're just thinking, Oh, shit, you know, I'm not, quote, perfect. And I'm fucking up. And I don't even realize how I'm fucking up and oh, my God. And that's not necessarily helpful for me to think like that about myself. Because, I mean, does that mean that I'm going to try and keep learning and changing if I keep shaming myself? No. If I keep trying to be compassionate and and say, Hey, listen, I'm doing my best and I will fuck up. You know? Because I'm a human being. And I have biases, and I'm trying to learn the biases. That's great. You know, just good, just good. And so if I do feel like I'm a piece of shit, I'm gonna miss him. He's just trying mistress try and do better. Yeah, so I was gonna say, let's do a, where are we at now? Okay, 50 minutes. So someone had mentioned oh, here's someone who is an anti dietitian who's who's really like, not doing not doing good stuff. And so I hadn't heard of this person. I went and looked at her account. And I thought, Oh, this is interesting. I'm not gonna share a name. But I went to her Instagram account to see what is up and I can see why she was flagged as someone who was maybe not doing the best and and it looks like she said in one of her videos like 10 years ago, I would be telling people to die but now I don't so I don't know if her journey has been 10 years long, but she has a you know, close to 200,000 followers. And on her account, we've got three categories of things that that she will post images of her and her body like full full body shots. She's thin and white by the way, and able bodied from as far as I can tell. Images of very healthy quote unquote, curated looking food like unrealistic food, food food that you enjoy, you're not even gonna get in a five star restaurant type food, you know? And and then like, quote type images, like educating type things. So, from that we were already kind of seeing from from listen to this episode, we think about this as a case study of we're already seeing some things there which which are our problems when I say seeing, you know, I'm describing to you what we're, what I'm I've seen, and so images of her and her body so she's using her body as a business card. Odd, which we don't want to be doing because we're perpetuating fat phobia. And getting an audience because her people, not everyone, but a lot of the people who follow her will think, Well, if I like her, I'll look like her images of of the food. The food is absolutely unattainable. Absolutely, unless you had a personal chef, living in your house, making these gourmet meals and also a lot of the images are of things that she's healthified by the way, she's not she's she's she's a Intuitive Eating dietitian. Okay. So she's not a you know, just the bog standard dietitian, she is meant to be, you know about the good stuff.

Speaker 1

56:02

And it's not happening. There's a there's lots of health ism, there's tons of focusing on health and no mention of what makes up health. So there's no kind of like, nuanced conversation about you know, like, hey, not everyone can be healthy. Focusing on health is health ism, and ableism, blah, blah, blah, lots of that unattainable food. There's no, there's no real food. You know, when I say real, there's no food that your I would eat. It's all very manufactured and pretty looking. And here's my big tell, I don't know if this is always a great indicator, is I like seeing who people follow. And if I see that I don't have anyone in common with them. And the people that we do have in common people that look like them, then that is a red flag for me. So I looked at who she's following. She's following, like 400 people. And when you look at someone who someone's following, you can see who you who, who's mutually, who, who you follow, who's also following them. Every single person that we read, we've got a mutual is sin and why. And then I scroll down and look at who else she's following. And from first glance, everyone said, and white, Fin and white, thin and white, thin and white. And it's only after scrolling down, almost through all of it, and I can see one black woman. So what that tells me is Who is this person learning from? This person is learning from other white people is learning from other thin people is learning from other able bodied people. Cisgender people is learning from people who looked like her. And so her viewpoint is going to be a lot narrower versus if she was learning from a wide variety of people. And I mean, this is you know, this is not perfect, right? We don't know who she's learning from, but I can guess it's not from people of color. It's not from fat people because she wouldn't be posting the things that she's posting. Because she'd be like, Oh, look, there's no not so helpful. And so now we look at someone else, someone else like Christy Harrison, I only use Christie because a lot of people will know who she is. And by the way, the person I was just talking about, they're not an evil person. They're not out there trying to ruin people's lives. They they're just, they just have areas where they're not maybe as exposed to different experiences. Like we all are, right. So Christy Harrison, an example of someone who's maybe doing doing a little bit better. And by the way, Christy is not like Saint on earth. No one is right. But if you look at Christy Harrison's feed is exclusively tweets and quotes from other people that she's had on her podcast, and Christy actually has done a really good job of she has at least one fat team member. Which I think is very, very important. I feel like I don't know if this is right, but this person has opened the possibilities for identifying a variety of guests. I don't know I'm just doing I'm just you know, that's normally what happens is if you have a more diverse team, there's going to be diversity of thought, right? If there's a diversity of identity, there's going to be diversity of thought. And so if you look at Christy's feed, and if you look at who she's following, so lots of fat activists, people of color, people who don't look and think like her basically and it's the same with I mentioned Lauren before. Lauren, Cadillac feel good dietitian, look at who she follows and a lot of variety of people. And so for me that As a clue, right? That's a real good clue who we learning from? Is it just people that look like us, then what we do is probably going to have bias in it accidentally. And even you know, I'm talking about this, I have absolutely a shit ton of privilege because I'm white. I'm also fat and trans, non binary and queer, but I am white. And so I should not be the only voice that you're listening to. Right? So, you know, yeah, learn from me, but also learn from people of color, black indigenous people of color. And, by the way, I followed lots of thin white dieticians, white people, and thin people are not the problem, right? It's, it's a problem if that's who are we learning from? Right?

Speaker 1

01:01:01

It's a problem. If we presume thin and white people are the authority, then the content that we're producing is going to be very kind of skewed in the ways, the ways that we've we've begun to think about things. And again, no one's perfect, right? It's not possible to be to be perfect. We're all gonna fuck up. And so giving grace but also, if, if you're if you are someone who's consuming the content of dieticians, if it doesn't feel good, go and have a look at who they're following. And see if it is you know, a diverse group of people or, or not. And that might give you a clue of maybe why is this content not landing if you're not sure that maybe you like we've talked about it today and, and that I've just shared what what people have said and not not everything. I'm collecting my own list of things. Other things I've seen and so I am going to make like a free download for for people who want it. And a training I think, you know, just like a little training for dietician, so we can talk about this stuff, because some of this stuff people might be like, what are we talking about and so be might be nice to talk about it. Um, okay, so hopefully I don't want this episode to feel like me saying, Oh, these fucking dietitians are so unintelligent, oh, and I'm sad, whatever. And oh, look at them being so awful. And I'm so not awful, you know, more kind of like, let's all try and do better and here are some ideas and if doesn't, if somebody doesn't feel good, then maybe here's a reason why. I might be saying that you'd be like, Vinny this whole episode was you just dragging and dragging then dieticians and telling telling us they're pieces of shit. That I can't control your thoughts. Dammit. Okay, well, thanks for hanging out with me today and hope you have a wonderful rest of your day and I'll see you in the next episode. Bye thanks for listening to the episode and if you feel ready to get serious about this work and want to know when the doors open to fears fatti Academy which is my signature program, where I teach all about how to overcome your fat phobic beliefs and learn to love your fat body, then go to first fatty.com forward slash waitlist again that is fierce fatty.com forward slash waitlist to get your name on the waitlist. For when first party Academy my signature program opens

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