Are you ready to date but last in the modern dating world today resident dating expert Well, at least in novels, and in real life, Alicia Rai is going to give someone a lovestruck makeover, setting her up to find the love of her life. I'm Sarah Wendell.
I'm Alicia Rai. Welcome to LoveStruck Daily where we bring love to your ears every single day. I'm in love with that to you. I'm in love with you.
Alicia, we've talked at length about my extensive dating history, which is zero. Yes. But I understand that you have many an awkward dating story complete with pastries on a sticky
I was sort of perpetually single for quite a long time. And and I was on all the apps and I did everything. So what happened was very short story because anyone can Google it. Obviously. I went on a first date, it did not go well. And you know when something's not going well, and you kind of focus on like foot thing that sort of encapsulates how badly it's going. And so there was a point where he was like, Oh, do you want anything and I already got my drinks. I was like, No, I'm good. Like, thanks. And he came back with his drink. And he came back with two cakepops. And I was like, Oh, that's sweet. Like, he got us a little dessert to eat. And then he ate them both. Like, like in front of me. It's just like, oh, okay, so I went home, I fired off a tweet that was just like, he came back with a cake box and ate them both in front of me and I thought like 100 People would laugh at it. We'd all move on with our lives. And it turned into like a two week long saga of like men, like especially men on YouTube discussing it like and I even went viral for it, which is what you're
referring to. Which was absolutely terrifying for me as your friend I was freaking terrified. Terrified. Like your screenshot was on Good Morning America.
As I was discussed on Good Morning America like that. It's not good. Yeah, it was very like Michael strands weighing in on my love life. It was intense. I got I had to shut down my Twitter for a while like it was I had to hand the password over to my friend to like, monitor it because it was so vile. So but there were also like a lot of fun things like some random guy sent me a $20 gift card to Starbucks. It was like that was really messed up here. How would you keep up on me? Oh, yeah. So yeah, I have. I have had like normal run of the mill bad dates I've had going viral for bad dates. And I've had well, I might end up in the trunk of his car. So it's hard out there.
Well, today we have someone who could really use your wide ranging expertise. Oh, and this is someone I know very well. Amanda deal is the co pilot and my assistant at Smart pitches. And we have worked together for almost 10 years. But she is looking for some advice on setting up a dating profile.
I know a lot about dating profiles.
And this is why you are the perfect person for this conversation. So we are going to give her the lovestruck treatment and prep her for the world of dating apps. And Modern love. Please welcome Amanda deal. Hello, Amanda.
Hi.
Thank you so much for coming on. I believe we're here to assist in whatever way we can. On your quest for love. We are always happy to help with that. Yeah,
my my love Quest has taken a hard reset.
You so you were in a long term relationship for a very long time. Right? Five, five holy years.
Wow. Yeah, yeah, we did meet on a dating app. Oh, okay. Where did you met? We met on Tinder. Okay, but my Tindering I wasn't looking for a relationship when I got into a relationship. But yeah, I'm not a stranger to dating apps, but I never thought I would return to them.
It happens I mean, and that's that's the dream, right? Just delete them forever. And then they
do this anymore. Yeah, it's tough.
Are there parts to being single that you are suddenly appreciating?
Yes, actually. Not. Not having plans. Not Yeah, going outside if I don't want to not like having to think what are we doing this weekend? Like nothing. We are doing nothing because it's just me, myself and I and you get to decide. I get to decide if I want to stay in bed and play video games or just nap all day. Cool. I can do that. Yeah, on the Other side, like, I miss the comfort and familiarity that came with a long term relationship, it's nice to have someone who kind of has seen the less than savory parts of being a person. So it's a trade off.
I mean, there's there's definitely like upsides to it. And when, you know, like, I was sort of perpetually single. And every time, you know, a huge part of me is like, I want a relationship. I just want somebody I want to find like a person who I can be with. But then other parts means like, wow, I can just get up whenever I want. Go do whatever I want. But there's also nothing wrong with you know, wanting to be in relationship. And I think that that's totally fine. I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves to be like, strong and single. And,
you know, oh, my God. Yes. You you tapped into a good 40% of my therapies.
Yeah. But this is still a very exciting time. This is exciting. Like, there is I know, it seems kind of like, maybe you dread it, maybe.
No, I did. I had downloaded hinge and Bumble. Okay, neither of which I was using prior. I was strictly Tinder before. Okay, but I don't feel like that's the vibe I'm really going for now. Like I want to actually like put thought and make more intentional matches. But I had downloaded pinch and Bumble on my phone and they sat there unopened for a few weeks, like okay, baby steps where it's like, Okay, I've downloaded it. I don't feel like I'm ready to open them and undergo making my profile and I think two ish weeks ago, I made I went through and like I made everything.
Alright, live workshop of the profile. Let's go do I just this is my first photo. Oh, that's adorable. Oh, horns.
It was a Halloween wedding.
Oh, that's so cute. I love your lipstick in that too. Okay, well, we'll demon girl. Very good. Very good. First close up of the face. That's what you start with. That's excellent.
And then hinge does like voice notes or boy. Yes. I love the voice. Oh, you too. Can we hear yours? The pressure. So the prompt is a quick rant about. We only put up red velvet being a flavor because it comes with cream cheese frosting, which I will concede is very good. So I think we should just normalize putting cream cheese frosting on other flavors so we can stop pretending Red Velvet is actually good.
I love that A plus no notes. The cake is a lie.
Yeah, that's amazing.
The next prompt was you should leave a comment if And my answer was you never grew out of your pop punk phase. Oh, that's cute. I was like an emo goth high schooler and that kind of carried me into adulthood. I'm like a casual goth woman. I just want to be someone's casual golf girlfriend is
where we're at. I think it does sort of pin you like both your vibe and you know, like a nostalgia factor of of where you're coming from. Yeah, so I think that's really cute. I like that.
I have an advanced degree. I have a master's degree 32 Woman pansexual liberal. Awesome. There's another prompt. I get along best with people who research the menu before getting to the restaurant.
signal that you want to go out to dinner signal that you'd like people who are prepared.
Yeah, I love people who are prepared. And then the last two are two photos. So this is one from a friend's wedding. Me doing floor choreography.
Oh, that's amazing. So
with your legs out ankles crossed elbows bent head back
that's a door and what happened was I sell and so I just turned it into four choreography that's perfect.
I love it. So the first photo is great All right, looks like it's very close up of your face. I would say after that try to put like some kind of full body photo after that because I do think that I do think it's a it's a dating app and like you said if there is like a physical component of it
what are some clever full body shots that you've seen Alicia like I'm thinking okay like this like I would be so so self conscious trying to do a photoshoot on my own body
like recruit my roommate,
I would say I love your photo on the dance floor. I think if you're dancing, if you're having fun, if you don't know what to do with your hands and you're feeling awkward like tuck your tuck your hair behind your ear. Look down if you don't want to look at the camera like make it look like you're just walking and someone snapped a photo of you like your dad's were photo I honestly for now, until you get another like fuling photo of you just standing I would put that as your second photo. I think it's hilarious photo. Yeah moving. Because I think it's so funny and it shows off your personality and it's basically a full like photos. And I will say it like all of your prompts are.
Those are great. Yeah. So far, I went on my very first date on Thursday. Okay, and I'm seeing them again tonight. Yeah. They've been really fun to talk to you. I think our first date, we just talked for three hours over fruity cocktails and french fries, which is wonderful.
That's a perfect first date. Right?
That really is a perfect first date. Yeah. What are you looking for in a partner? Or in a day?
We're gonna speak it into the universe, what are your What are your must haves?
I feel like, I'm not very, like strict. I love some some common ground with any of my hobbies. So you know, they they don't have to check every box like I love to read. It's almost like it's my job. But like, I don't have to date a reader. That's totally fine. Yeah, I love like, video games. I love horror movies. But I also like to have freedom to do my own things. Like I am not a partner, who wants to spend all of their time with their partner doing things together.
Are you like more into the strong silent type? Or do you like funny people? Or
listen, no one's gonna be funnier than I am. So yeah, that's
true. Do you just want someone to laugh at your jokes, because that's what really what I wanted. I was like, I need somebody who will laugh at everything I say.
We I like laughing. And I also like being funny. So I feel like, you know, like a goofy sort of relationship where we can kind of riff off of each other would be great.
Do you have any specific advice questions that maybe we can try to answer? Like, what what have you got hit me
as a very strong person who doesn't like to be vulnerable? What I'm struggling with, I feel like the person who is interested the most is, for lack of a better term, the weakest in terms of the power dynamic. Yeah. Does that make sense? And it's hard not to view things that way. Because it makes being vulnerable. Very scary. Yeah. Right.
I mean, here's what I would say to that. And I think that this is true for everybody. Like, I felt that way, a lot of times, like, Oh, if I really liked this guy, that means he has all the power, he's in charge. But once you find somebody, any person who you're both equally into each other, that worry will kind of recede a little bit. Because you're both going to want to make an effort and you're both going to be the more interested party, or at least you're gonna think you're the more interested in party. When you're out there and you're talking to somebody if you get a vibe that they're not that into you or that they're not that interested in you. It's okay for that to be a turn off for you. I can be like, Okay, well, I'm not gonna waste my time with you anymore. I can move on. So I don't necessarily think it's like a bad thing to have that feeling.
And I think like the other thing, right now, I mean, I'm, I've only gone on one date so far, right? But it's kind of also thinking like, is the connection that I'm feeling a mutual romantic connection? Or do we just have like, really good vibes together? Like, I'm feeling a romantic connection to this person? Yeah. But is it mutual? Or are we just like hanging out, which I like that's also totally fine. But to kind of know where both parties
are, unfortunately, I think that's one of those things where you just have to hang out with each other more. It's so it's annoying. I wish there was like a button you could press on your first date to be like,
yeah, definitely you like me check yes or no? Yeah, like it's,
it's so frustrating because sometimes you're like, Oh, I feel a romantic connection right off the bat. You know, it takes some time sometimes to take a couple more dates. But I know that is it is frustrating to not know
I am a chronically impatient person. Yeah. Like I know.
Would you be comfortable if we asked listeners to let us know if they have somebody for
Yeah, so Okay, great. Love that.
So listeners if you are somebody listening or if you know somebody, Amanda's fantastic, we can vouch for her.
I am a pansexual. Woman so any guys gals non binary pals, excellent that my way, her way.
As my son says the gays The base and the beautiful days mute. You can email us at lovestruck daily at frolic dot media. I promise I will not be a scary gatekeeper to your Roman army. I will.
I will tackle Sarah.
Can you come back and give us an update? Yeah, of course.
Thank you so much, Amanda for coming on. We really, really appreciate it. Thank
you for having me.
Sarah, your coworker is excellent.
Isn't she lovely? I'm so proud to work with her every day.
I cannot wait. I hope we can find her like the perfect person. That would be my dream. If we can make like, lovestruck connections. Oh, it should be jingle
loves connections protecting you. Yeah.
fulica Maybe a telephone company jingle anyway. What is your love to go for today's episode? What do you want our listeners to take with them?
Don't be afraid to be honest about what it is you're looking for in your life. When Amanda was saying she was on Tinder she was looking for you know, casual connections and now she's looking for something and she's looking with intention. Don't be afraid to have intentions and be honest about what it is you're looking for in your life. You have to identify it for yourself where you can go out and find it. So don't be afraid to be honest about what you want. Because what you want is very valid. And someone else is looking for what you want. What you want. So yeah, be honest. And we are completely serious. If you think you know someone who would be a good match for Amanda, please email us at lovestruck Delia frolic dot media and if you have a love story to share, or you want to tell us about your dating app, or you would like some profile advice get in touch same email address Love Struck daily at frolic dot media that also could be a jingle. You can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at lovestruck daily. And please leave a review subscribe, tell your friends yell out the window about how great the show is. Each and every time someone tags us on Instagram. I get excited. So please, please bring us that glee because seriously, I make a complete fool of myself. Our researcher is Jesse Epstein. Our editor is Jen Jacobs. We are produced by Abigail steckler and little Scorpion studios and Gillian Davis with executive producer frolic media. This is an iHeart Radio Podcast. And as always, we wish you a wonderful happily ever after today with I'm in love with you I'm in love with you