Infant and Toddler Language Development Series: Part 2

5:33PM Jan 15, 2025

Speakers:

Narrator

Priscilla W.

Priscilla Weigel

Cindy McInroy

Keywords:

toddler language development

early childhood language

speech therapist

language milestones

motor development

language imitation

word combinations

pronoun confusion

grammar development

visual supports

language narration

emotional labeling

language control

language growth

language challenges

Welcome to Inclusion Matters, a podcast about children's development from the Center for Inclusive Child Care.

Welcome to Inclusion Matters the podcast from the Center For Inclusive Child Care. I'm Priscilla Weigel, the executive director, and I'm here for part two of a conversation with Cindy McInroy, who is a speech and language therapist and expert in early childhood language development and former colleague of mine, known her for 30 years. We worked together at Frazier years ago, and had so much fun in that work. We were both like soaking things up as and I learned so much from her, as her, you know, through her being my colleague, because of her expertise. And we've already talked about infants and their development, Cindy, so welcome back. We're going to talk today about toddlers and what we need to know about them.

Yep, and we'll talk about maybe toddlers, and then maybe all the way up to four years old. Ish, to kind of close out the because this is when now that language starts to kind of like clip along and really grow that like, literally in one month's time passing, your child can be such a different communicator. .

Yeah, amazing. What a happy time and a fun time for that child. You just, I mean, I just love to see the joy when a child figures out how to truly communicate their needs, using words and seeing how that changes the world around them, and can really give them so much powerful control to things.

Right? It is a lot about control and about us helping to kind of, like, guide them into finding the words to make their needs met, and also knowing that still a lot of the times we have to be that kind of external voice, and helping to, like, narrate or to helping clarify what things are, because They're just trying to figure out how language works and it's a lot. It's I always, I mean, like you said, I've done this for over 30 years, and I am still truly amazed at someho, I mean, it's amazing they learn how to walk, but it's really, really amazing that they figure out how to make a lung get air a voice box to turn on or off depending on the sound ,coordinate a jaw and tongue and lips and everything to just anatomically come together at the same time as a brain is sending down a word and produce it. So truly, it's why I'm a speech therapist, because truly, the fact that they learn to talk is indeed a miracle. Yeah, it's it's amazing how much coordinated stuff it takes to communicate.

That is such a great reminder to all of us, I think, as we become frustrated because someone's not able to use their words, and they might cry or whine or throw it, throw themselves on the floor because it is so hard, and it is very hard to be patient with that process.

Totally it takes a lot of patience, a lot of patience and a lot of trying too and I know in working with you, I learned so much too in that we sometimes have to give them the words. So I'm like your face is showing me it's really sad. I think what you're trying to tell me is you wanted to have snack right now, but I'm sorry that is not an option. And yeah, giving them talking through that your your body's showing me it's kind of angry right now because we can't go outside. Let's have some choices for something else. Yeah, we can do this or this.

Yeah, and so as you think about this age group, what are some things that really our listeners should know about the progression of development, and what are, so you know, those types of things, and then infused in there, what we can do as that caregiver and guide through this process,.

So when they start out, like one and a half year olds, 18 months old, the general guideline, I think, when you look at developmental milestones, it'll usually say, like, first words by 12 months. And that is usually majority of kids will have, like, the word mama or dada. They'll have a few words at 12 months. Some kids do not have first words, though, until like 18 months or closer to 21 months, especially kids who are really big motor kids. Kids who are moving around and moving around all over, they tend to be later talkers, and that's totally neurologically wired. The right side of your brain controls physical movement. The left side of your brain is where speech is until a child is three years old and only one part of their brain can grow at a time, so children literally cannot chew gum, walk and talk at the same day. So what happens is, is that I'm a super motor motivated and this tends to be what people think of as little boys, but it's really more just kind of learner, because I've seen just as many late talking girls, kids who are super motorvated. They're the early walkers, or even if they're the regular walkers on time, they're the kids that go straight from crawling to walking to running to climbing, and they're just all about motor. They are see it, do it. Their eyes lead them to go learn, find hands on, figure out how to do it. Here if they tend to be late walkers, their gross motor stuff, sometimes they tend to be on mark or early talkers. And that's because learning how to talk is a hear it, do it. I have to if we could build words our see it, do it kids could do it too. So it kind of depends on where they land. But by 18 months, kids should have a solid, you know, three to five labeling, kind of words. Momma, dadda, milk, juice, puppy, book, car. You know, toys that are favorites, foods that are favorites, things that they have a lot of experience with. They should be also consistently imitating words after an adult. So when you say banana, they say nana, or they say that simple word approximation to it. It shouldn't sound perfect, but it should sound close to the word. Important is we all love our children They're all geniuses. So obviously, sometimes parents are like, oh yeah, they've got 20 words, knowing that, is it really a word, or is it a constant vowel approximation to a word for a lot of things. So like ba for ball, ba for banana, ba for bed, ba for book, so nope, that would be, I have a constant vowel syllable approximation to a lot of words. So knowing that, does it sound close to that target? The constants don't need to be perfect. We'll talk about articulation later. But, um, but, so it sounds sort of like the thing you imitated. Then, as they get to about two years old, they should be able to now, they should be reliably pointing at an object, picture in a book, when you ask them, show me a ball, where's a shoe? Where's a boot? So a picture representation of an object, recognizing an object at like 12, 15 months or 15 months, but now at two, I should be able to find it in a picture. And then also at two is when they should start now be kind of combining two word phrases, more juice, daddy bye, mama up, baby sleep. So those simple action words, ing verbs come later. But those simple like, go, mine, it sometimes starts at two or my, a lot of times it's the grammatical error is okay, it's there. So they're like, mine, baby, yeah, you know. So two are kind of combinations and that and that, they're trying to then still, they're still imitating you. They're still trying to expand. In the previous podcast, we talked a little bit about jargon. So the debigabitdidyou, that can continue on up until about two where it's jargoning with true words in it. Because their brain is hearing conversation, and that is their conversation so big a dig a big a dig banana, big bab dig a dig ging imy more go and so they throw in these true words in the middle of their jargon, okay, and that's they're conversing. That's the only way they can do it. They don't have all those other words to fill in quite yet. So then just kind of keeps emerging and it moves on. Kids around the age of two should be able to and probably can also label a few, but at least be able to point to body parts and clothing when you ask the major body parts, eyes, nose, mouth, ears. When you say, touch your nose. Where's your nose that you will use? Usually and oftentimes, do that better on someone else or on a doll than on themselves, because to see it and point to it is much easier, sure than away versus finding it on me, and they all, all, all confuse eyes and ears. Always. So calm down listeners. Eyes and ears. We don't think those words don't that much alike, but to a small toddler, they do. Tommy's bellies, yeah, whatever you call your tummy, that also is one that they will find. Minor body part, that's not until closer to like four, neck, chin, elbow, knee. So yes, will they learn to do heads, shoulders, knees and toes? Yes. Do they know the body parts? Probably only head, because they've learned it by the imitation of the motor memory of doing it from the song trying it in isolation, maybe not so much.

Yeah, okay, interesting. So when you think about, you know, once again, adults in the world of these toddlers and young preschoolers, we're, are we worried about perfection? I know you're going to talk about articulation later on in one of our next episodes, too. But, but what you know, sometimes I think that adults get so caught up in the right way to say it that, in some cases, does that then make a child feel unsure about speaking and kind of scared to talk if they're always corrected. Or what do you what do you tell families when you're working with someone who's got these emergent skills and that adult is trying for perfect.

So what I always say is that, and I talked about it in the last one, and it's pretty much through the lifespan, is that you're always narrating. You're always talking. So when you're talking, you're giving them the adult version, that true, matured language version of doing something. It is okay, though, to simplify it to their language as so I might go, look this boy is swimming, he's swimming in a pool. Boy swimming, swimming pool. And then, because they now have heard that ing, or I might just even go, boy swim, swim water, because they have now heard the model. It's all about the receptive language going first, what I understand I store first. The expressive language comes later, and I figure out how to take what I know in my head and say it out loud. That develops after I know it, after I know what in means before I say put it in or whatever I can follow it before I say it. Pronouns are a classic, where's you know, where's your shoe?, but then what is that? A lot of times they'll be like your shoe, me, my new yours. Super hard, because when you're trying to explain it to them, the pronouns get all confusing, even to us as we're trying to describe it, yeah. So use the adult use the mature language form, but then break it down into whatever state your child is at, because you are teaching them what it will become when they're ready to get there, but you're giving them the words at the level they can use now,

Yeah, oh, that's beautiful. That's a beautiful reminder. Yeah, that's great. So, and then also, I think you maybe touched a little bit about grammar and and looking at that piece of it as well, and expectations.

Yeah and that's what so like word order. So what happens is, is that kids so the first pronouns we learn are, I, me, mine , you, your. Those are the first ones we understands, first one we learn. It's not until into like that four year old age that they understand, going into fours that they understand, he, him, so gender marker pronouns, he, him, they, them, theirs, and then use them accurately when they're describing things. That's like a four year old kind of a skill. Kids oftentimes mix gender. And I always I as a speech therapist, I do not write pronoun kind of goals. And I when I try to test kids now, I try to be aware of gender diversity and gender awareness. And so I when I give directions, I'm like, show me the child, rather than show me the boy or hear him. I mean, I still do it, but that's up to each family. Because you, if you have people who use they them plurals, that's that's important, that's their identity. And so teaching children how to use that, and I think that in this next generation of kids who are coming up, it is going to be just, it's just going to be a part of their vernacular that just rolls up their tongue. It won't matter so much so, because it is a normal and natural thing for kids to confuse pronouns anyway. So then what I do is, as they get towards kindergarten, oh, that person identifies as a girl, they think of themselves as a girl. She has a puppy, and I just model it that way, and that just helps with it. And we're just making them because our statistics, our data, shows that, and it is something we work on. People like, Yeah, but they're only in preschool that kids who have a different internal gender identity than what they externally present that they know that at the age of five, I have four year olds who identify as being other and using other names, who have wanted to change their names from their name at birth because they are like because I'm not that name, and they know, and they solidly know at four and five years old who they are. And that's only that's only just kudos to the environment, the educational world, and who we are, that we're gonna let kids be kids, because that's what's important, and give them the words around it. So that's what we do. So the grammar part of that, verbs started as simple verbs, like go, then they learn ing verbs, the action verbs of swimming, whatever, ed verbs, past tense. That's, again, that's like, like, a four year old thing. It's cute. Every kid said, I goaded, every kid world, I goaded to the zoo yesterday. That two time intense marker that is, again, four year old is when a lot of it all, like, comes together. Three year olds are really but good about just three word sentences, factual in the now, things that are happening right now. Three year olds also are best at when you give them like first then directions, but testing out on them before we go to the store, you need to pick up your toys, knowing that when kids are little in that receptive language thing that they're still sometimes in that, that stage of what I hear first, I do first, and what I hear second I do second. So when we say, before you can play, before you can watch a movie, you need to pick up your toys. And they go over and they sit in front of the TV, and then we say it to him again, no, before you can watch a movie. And they're like, I am, you told me watch toys, watch movie, pick up toys. Yeah. And so then you have to catch yourself and go, wait, oh no, first you have to pick up your toys then we will watch the movie and then say it again. So before we watch the movie, we're gonna pick up toys. That's how they learn the language. So you don't have to be a constant monitor of your words. But when you start to see that behavior start to change, or a breakdown in what it was you said and they didn't seem to want to follow through on think of how you said it, yeah, because it might need just some rewording or a different kind of a prompt. So it's not a denial. They're just doing it exactly the way their brain interpret it. right?

I have a great story of that. So I was coaching in a setting, and it was after lunchtime, and the teacher said to a group of four year olds, and I was there to observe and support a little guy who was having some processing with, you know, the receptive, incoming information. And the teacher said, Okay, clean up your lunch, throw away your garbage, put your lunch box in your cubbies, and go in the bathroom and wash your hands. And so this little guy ended up standing in the bathroom holding his lunch box. And that was one of those opportunities, exactly what you're describing to go, okay, so that's what his brain heard. Those are the words that he connected. And so he's following directions based on what his brain can handle right now, in that moment. And so working with that educator to say, let's break things up into a few shorter steps that he can achieve, because he was having challenges following all that. That was a lot.

It was, I was like, yeah, you lost me at step three. Obviously, obviously, I work at preschool with preschoolers. Because I was like, whoa. I got lost between lunch box and bathroom. So yeah, and I think too, giving kids visuals. We talk a lot about with our kids who have language needs, giving them visual supports. But we can do that with all of our kids, and especially, and as I mean, we do it as adults, especially people who are, you know, kind of more, see it, do it learners, they lots of times make lists. But if I'm a ear student learner, I have to like, like, I literally just yesterday I walked in the store and I was like, milk, pasta, cannoli filling, its like I have to say it over and over to myself as I'm going in to remember. So it's the same thing is that taking and when I when I tell kids multiple step directions, I point it out on my fingers, number one, we're helping them learn the ordinal attachment of one, two and three also can be first, then last or first, second, last. So you're helping giving a visual to something that's a language concept that is really kind of obscure, like how the number one becomes the first thing, or second and third, like, and then they start calling us that by grades, or where we are in line. It's very obscure, and it's obscure concepts they know by the time they are five years old. And so what I do is, I'm like, first we're going to put the toys in the basket. Second next, we're going to go to the kitchen and pick out snack. Then we will be able to play outside and point it on my fingers, just like those little flags on there. And then if they get lost on the way, then I go, can you remember what this one was? And I point to, like my second picture, you did a great job. You put the toys in the basket. What are we doing now? And giving them that, that slowed down, voice that's calm, that because whenever we're under stress, or someone, we feel like we're under stress, then our brain can't remember what it was supposed to do, and we get just even more, you know, then we get the whole fight or flight thing coming, yeah? And then you got people crying and having breakdowns or running away, yeah. So calming it down, taking a deep breath, hmm. Let's put on our thinking brain. Can remember what we do next? Do you think it's the kitchen, or is it something here in the living room, and they pause it. There's no answer. I think it's the kitchen. Let's go pick out snack. Then we're gonna go outside. So you're helping them learn and pace it out and fill in the blanks.

Yes, and the the observer, as that adult we can, in that moment, slow things down and help get to the bottom of what the issue is. And it's our job, because we are there, to really support and foster that learning and that growth.

Yeah, and then it's really nice is that I always warn or give warning to people so that three year olds are doing three year old sentences. Four year olds four year old sentences are now four year olds can have a full on conversation. They can ask, you know, they're following, what questions they're answering where questions. Why Is kind of like a four year old kind of a thing easier as a simple problem solving question, what do I do when your hands are dirty? What you would do about that? Why? Four year olds ask why all the time, and that's because they're trying. Two year olds are all about me, and I'm sure in your pockets of people that the two year olds, if you have it, it's mine. If I have it, it's mine. If I want it, it's mine. If it's even a remote interest, of course, it's mine, of course. So they're all internal, and their language is internal. That's what's all about. Label, label, label, label, and little sentences. Three year olds start to figure out they still want a lot of structure, but they want to have controls. I think three year olds are way harder than two year olds. Because three year olds know you're trying to distract them, yes, so three, so three year olds work really well with choices. You can have the train or the block. They also work really well with peers on trading, they still are kind of that mindset, hey, let's trade. So instead of sharing, is that trading and then talking. Because sharing is kind of a hard concept, but trading is very concrete. Putting timelines around things, you can say "let's do it two more times, and then we're gonna do something new." So three year olds, they still need the control the you're the controls around them, but you're using your language and accepting their language to be able to manage the control. So they get choices. They think they're in control because they got the choice. You're actually in control because you made the option for what the options would be, yeah, and you have to learn to accept their no. If you ask a kid, do you want to go to the bathroom and they say, no, you gave x so I'm like, avoid at all cost yes no questions, unless you are really prepared to follow through with the no. Because otherwise, otherwise we're not developing what, what trust in, what language gives for me. Labeling emotions because they really don't. Three year olds know, mad, happy, sad, that's it. That's what they know. And everything falls in those three terms. So giving them language for the other stuff, but don't expect them to say it. I love, when three year olds say I'm frustrated. I'm like, I'm sure you are, but you know what that really is? I'm like, it's we're still gonna help you with that. Four year olds are about the why then. So four year olds now are they get that external controls. They get that they have control in the environment, and they want to know the why. They're trying to figure out the why they're trying to figure out, when can I control and when can I not? And that's why they ask a lot of why questions, and that's why you have to keep kind of answering them back, and then sometimes going, I don't know, can you remember why? And helping them figure that out so they can understand lots of questions. Four year olds can tell you about stuff. They may not get it in correct order, and their grammar may not be correct. What four year olds are famous for, well, "yesterday, I'm going to go to the zoo," and you're like, or, you know, "last night, I think I'm gonna go and have a chocolate cake for my birthday." And so they mix time concepts that is not that is not clear. They're still figuring that out. But their language, four year olds have have sweet language, because when they tell you about an event, it could be about three different events all mushed into one. It doesn't matter, because all of that, that amazing language they have, is fully on display.

That's such a great way to wrap up this conversation to go into our next episode. I know that we've had so much fun hearing about the details of language development, which is a marvel in itself. And in the next episodes, we're going to really talk about some of those concerns that might arise. What do we do about that? How can we support some challenges that might occur, some issues or delays and Cindy McInroy, speech pathology or speech and language therapist, excuse me, thank you so much for being on Inclusion Matters. And for those of you who are listening, we are going to continue to add to this series. And you can go to inclusivechildcare.org, our website, if you want more information on language development and some of the other resources that Cindy shared. The CDC ,Help Me Grow, all those things are really available. And we also have developmental brochures on our website that are available too that talk about what to expect and when to be concerned. And so all of these things are covered in those as well. So Cindy, I look forward to having our continued conversation in our next episode.

Yeah, wonderful. Look forward to talking soon. Thanks all.

Thanks for listening. For more resources, visit us at inclusivechildcare.org.