Today is the 17th of January 2023. And this talk is the last in a series, reading from and commenting on a little book by Thich Nhat Hanh called "Our Appointment With Life: The Buddha's Teaching on Living in the Present." And we started with these talks back in November for a two day urban retreat. And there hasn't been another chance to just finish off. So glad to be finishing off this, this really very helpful text - this time around - this fourth talk.
We're going to pick up more or less where we left out, left off. And the section is headed: "The Past and Future Both Lie in the Present."
When we think about the past, feelings of regret or shame may arise. When we think about the future, feelings of desire or fear may come up. But all of these feelings arise in the present moment. And all of them affect the present moment. Most of the time, their effect does not contribute to our happiness or joy. We have to learn how to face these feelings. The main thing we need to remember is that the past and the future are both in the present. And if we take hold of the present moment, then we also transform the past and the future. There's something very liberating about really realizing that all our thoughts and regrets about the past and all our worries and expectations about the future. Our thoughts and story making that's happening right now. Maybe deep seated thoughts, thoughts, like a core narrative, but they're still happening now. In this moment. He continues, how can we transform the past, in the past, we may have said or done something destructive or harmful, and now we regret it. according to Buddhist psychology, regret is an indeterminate emotion. This means that it can be either constructive or destructive. When we know that something we have said or done has caused harm, we may give rise to a mind of repentance, vowing that in the future, we will not repeat the same mistake in this case are feeling of regret, was has a wholesome effect. And I think it's fair to say that, that when we make a mistake, the sooner we can correct it or apologize or admit to somebody that we've we've made a mistake there, the better it is. If on the other hand, that feeling of regret continues to disturb us, make it making it impossible for us to concentrate on anything else, taking all the peace and joy out of our lives, then that feeling of regret has turned into an unwholesome effect.
Guilt is one of the most painful and damaging of, of emotions that fit into these this category. Different from a grid and that guilt implies that we we identify with the harmful action that we're thinking about and turn ourselves really into something static. I am a failure or I am a bad person. Soon, while I'm hopeless
when regret becomes unwholesome, we should first distinguish whether the cause was based on something we did or said, or on something we fail to do or say. If in the past, we said or did something destructive, we can call that an error of commission. We did or said something with a lack of mindfulness and it caused harm. Sometimes we commit an error of omission. We did harm by not doing what needed to be said or done. And that brought us regret or sorrow. It's an important point that silences is not always the most compassionate or the wisest response to a situation if we see something we see injustice, speaking out, maybe really important. Roshi Kapleau used to say, Silence may be golden, but it can also be yellow.
So we did harm by saying or doing by by not saying or doing what needed to be settled down. And that borders great regret and sorrow, a lack of mindfulness was there and its results are still present. Our pain, shame and regret, are an important part of that result. If we observe the present deeply and take hold of it, we can transform it. We do so by means of mindfulness, determination, and correct actions and speech. It's a good way of putting it putting it to take hold of the present, to take ourselves in hand, and create a wholesome response as opposed to an unwholesome one.
When we transform the present in this way, we also transform the past and at the same time we build the future. And this is because you can't really separate them with as well as the so called past end, and then the present begin, it's not so clear. The same with the future. If we say that all is lost, everything is destroyed, all the suffering has already happened. We do not see that the past has become the present. Of course, the suffering has already been caused, and the wound of that suffering can touch a very soul. But instead of lamenting about or suffering from what we have done in the past, we should take hold of the present and transform it. The traces of a bad drought can be only raised by a bountiful rainfall, and rain can only fall in the present moment. He goes on to offer a gutter of repentance different from the one that we have in our repentance ceremony. And this is the one who offers all wrongdoings arise because of mind. If mind is transformed, can any wrongdoing remain? After repentance My heart is light, like the cloud floating free in the sky.
because of our lack of mindfulness, because our mind was obscured by desire, anger and jealousy we acted wrongly. What that is what is meant by all wrongdoings arise because of mind. But if the wrongdoing arose from our mind, it can also be transformed within our mind. If our mind is transformed, then the objects perceived by our mind mind will be transformed. Such transformation is available if we know how to return to the present moment. Once we have transformed our mind, our mind will be as light as a floating cloud and we will become a source of joy and peace for ourselves and others. One of the the real positive outcomes of experiencing regret and repentance is humility, greater humility, and greater compassion for others in the same situation. People have who've experienced great regret and repentance over over an act or or not acting on some area will sometimes devote the whole rest of their lives to a cause. That actually keeps them in touch with that feeling of regret. But but it turns into joy, you hear this again and again, from people who have turned their lives around and are able to help others do the same. Many, many people in AAA would fit that that description. They've been to the depths, and they've come back, and so they're able to guide others.
If we can transform the past, we can also transform the future. Our anxieties and fears for the future, make the present dark. That's another really helpful point, our anxieties and fears for the future, make the present dark, there is no doubt that the future will be black too, because we know that the future is made up of the present. So we assume this if we're living in a dark prison, taking care of the prison is the best way to take care of the future. Sometimes, because we are so concerned about what will happen the next day, we toss and turn all night unable to sleep, we worry if we cannot sleep during the night, we will be tired the next day and unable to perform to the best of our ability. The more we worry, the more difficult it is for us to sleep. Through everyone has experienced this, the way one can toss and turn. And it get more and more uncomfortable, more aware about the tension in our bodies, as the hours tick by. And he gives a bit of advice here, which I've shared with other people over the years and practice myself that very often can work work well. And what he says is to what he basically advisors is just to stay in bed, and follow your breath. And just enjoy the enjoy the opportunity to rest and, and and savor the breath. I add to these these basic instructions to lie straight on one's bag, so that the whole of the body is is as much at ease as possible. And if we can just then we take hold of the prisoners, he says then self concern about getting enough rest drops away and we do actually get rest in this position. The mind may not get the rest but at least the body can relax some more.
It's it's particularly challenging at 4am when this when we find ourselves tossing and turning and anxious about something. Because we're not fully awake, we're not fully master of our house or faculties. So actually getting up sometimes getting up and doing something even sitting can be helpful in this regard.
When we hear that the forests of our planet are diseased and dying so rapidly, we may feel anxious. We are concerned for the future because we are aware of what is happening in the present moment. Our awareness can motivate us to do something to halt the destruction of our environment, obviously are concerned for the future is different from worry and anxiety which only drain us we have to know how to enjoy the presence of beautiful healthy trees in order to be able to do something to protect and preserve them to to allow us to feel the other side of this not just the grief and the sense of loss. But the appreciation the joy that can come from just being around and under trees will planting them
when we throw a banana peel into the garbage if we are mindful, we know that that peel will will come compost and be reborn as a tomato or a lettuce In just a few months, but when we float throw a plastic bag into the garbage thanks to our awareness, we know that a plastic bag will not become a tomato or a salad green quite so quickly. Some kinds of garbage need four or 500 years to decompose. Nuclear Waste needs a quarter of a million years before it stops being harmful and returns to the soil. Living in the present moment in an awakened way. Looking after the present moment with all our heart, we will not do things which destroy the future. That is the most concrete way to do what is constructive for the future. And this includes doing what we can to encourage others not to do things which destroy the future. One, one version of the the, the four efforts. hazard is not just doing good and avoiding evil but helping others to do good and avoid evil. And to not start doing evil and to continue to do good.
In our everyday life, we may also produce poisons for our minds. And these poisons destroy not only thus us, but also those who live with us in the present and in the future to Buddhism talks about three poisons desire hatred and ignorance. Or sometimes we have delusion there an anger. In addition, there are other poisons whose capacity to do harm is very great jealousy, prejudice, pride, suspicion, and obstinacy.
We're doing ourselves a favor in identifying these things and being able to recognize them or what they are, and to know that they're, they're harmful. There find ways, the best ways to work with them. That awareness is the key awareness, awareness, awareness.
In our day to day relationships with ourselves, others in our environment, any or all of these poisons can manifest, Blaze up and destroy our peace and joy, as well as the peace and joy of those around us. These poisons can linger and pollute our minds, causing bitter consequences in the future. So to live in the present moment is also to accept and face these poisons as they arise, manifest and return to the unconscious and to practice observe observation, meditation, in order to transform them. This is a Buddhist practice, to live in the present is also to see the wonderful and wholesome things in order to nourish and protect them. Happiness is the direct result of facing things and being in touch, that happiness is the material from which a beautiful future is manufactured.
Here like to just talk a little bit about forgiveness. I think we touched on this in this in the third job but didn't get around to concluding him. Based on on this teaching, I've taken at home and it's pretty clear that we we forgive, to free ourselves to free our own minds. And then not it's not so much for the perpetrator who has his or her own process to go through. Martin Luther King said, forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a permanent attitude. And we can understand why he particularly would say this as a member of an oppressed group, where one would experience multiple micro aggressions in a single day and then major structural issues that are caused by racism as well and the huge effects of those. So to forgive again and again and again. was necessary is necessary to in order to do To stay free to keep the mind free forgiveness forgiveness, of course, is is central teaching of Christianity, Buddhism we talk more about about letting go, which is very closely related. But I'd like to read a little bit from the Gospel according to Jesus. This is a wonderful book by Steven Moulton Mitchell who was, was a Zen student, a translator of many, many different spiritual books, as well as Rainer Maria Rocha and his section common the topic of power of forgiveness, which is, is very insightful. He says, in Jesus's sayings, it may seem as if God's forgiveness is dependent on ours, forgive us our wrongs as we forgive those who have wronged us. That's the route straight from the Lord's Prayer people may notice, forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And so she kind of shallow reading of us would think, well, if I forgive others for their offenses, then God will forgive me for mine. And if I don't judge, I won't be judged. so forth. But he says, these ifs have only one side, like a mobius strip. This is, if you take a strip of paper and twist it and join the two ends together, you get an endless surface. So he says these ifs about forgiving others so that God will forgive us have only one side like a mobius strip. Jesus doesn't mean that if you do condemn, God will condemn you. Or if you don't forgive, God won't forgive you. He is pointing to a spiritual fact. When we condemn, we create a world of condemnation for ourselves, and we attacked, attract the condemnation of others. When we cling to an offense, we are clinging to precisely what separates us from our own fulfillment. Letting go means not only releasing the person who has wronged us, but releasing ourselves, a place opens up inside us where that person is always welcome. And where we can always meet her again and again, face to face. I think this also applies applies to forgiving ourselves. Because when we don't forgive ourselves that can be these parts of our own interior that are not welcome excel in a way. He continues in those sayings of Jesus, God is a mirror reflecting back to us our own state of being, we receive exactly what we give. The more open hearted we are, the more we can experience the whole universe is God's grace, or the grace of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas. We could say forgiveness is essentially openness of heart. It is an attitude, not an action action, just as Martin Luther King says. And he quotes a bit of the Bible here. Peter once asked him, Jesus, in other words, sir, how often should I forgive my brother if he keeps wronging me up to seven times? And Jesus said to him, no, not just 770 times seven.
Stephen Mitchell likens this, this attitude of forgiveness, as arising not from from morality but from a sense of broader vision. An even more than this as itself, what he calls the inexhaustible energy of life. He then quotes a Taoist poem. Why did the ancient masters esteem the Dow because being one with the Dow when you seek you find and when you make a mistake, you are forgiven. That is why everybody loves it. This is the vivid experience of anyone who lives in harmony with the way things are. What does it mean to say that when we are one with a Dao we are forgiven, as soon as we make a mistake, we become aware of it, we admit it, and we correct it on the spot. Thus there is no residue. Attitude precedes action and generates it. And he goes on to talk about cultivating the mind of universal compassion, which could see as a as an aspect of our own tradition, which is related closely to that forgiveness, in talks about the the engaging in medical practice where one has a sense loving kindness to oneself. And eventually, to those who have we feel have wronged us our enemies. So it's a very demanding of us to to find ways to really send love and kindness and compassion to each of these groups. Over the years come to see developing loving kindness in oneself is really essential ingredient that if that's not there, then practice can come back, become very bleak and, and dry, arid even.
And then comments on on his talk about loving kindness and sending it to one's enemies and so forth. Any anyone who finds it difficult to forgive, should try the effects of doing this metta meditation every day, for 10 or 20 years. Just a reminder to us of what what it takes what what the sort of timeframes of making some real profound movement happen in our you know depths of our minds.
Back to our text nine takes an exception has hit it up. Life is found in the present. To return to the present is to be in contact with life. Life can be found only in the present moment. Because the past no longer is in the future has not yet come Buddhahood liberation, awakening peace, joy and happiness can only be found in the present moment. Our appointment with life is in the present moment. The place of our appointment is right here in this very place. And we learn this over and over again. Because this there's a lot in our lives which we don't want to face that we don't accept, that we would rather not have to deal with. And certainly which we're we're not ready to let go of
that moment by moment if we're working on on a con. Then this moment is the moment where we're one we'll see into the con become one with it.
Peace Joy, liberation, awakening happiness Buddhahood the source. Everything we long for and seek after, can only be found in the prison moment. To abandon the present moment in order to look for these things in the future is to throw away the substance and hold on to the shadow. In Buddhism, aimlessness apparently heater is taught as a way to help the practitioner stop pursuing the future and return wholly to the present. Sometimes it's translated as goal lessness. It's perhaps better translation aimlessness is sometimes called Wish. lessness is another translation, and it is one of the three doors to liberation. The other two are emptiness and sightlessness. To be able to stop pursuing the future allows us to realize that all the wonderful things we seek are present in us. In the present moment. Life is not a particular place or a destination. Life is a path. To practice walking meditation is to go without needing to arrive. Every step can bring us peace, joy and liberation. That is why we walk in the spirit of aimlessness, there is no way to liberation, peace and joy, peace and joy are themselves the way our appointment with the Buddha with liberation and with happiness is here and now. We should not miss this appointment
we were we conditioned, so much to being restless. But really the world starts to open up when we when we settle down. And we can go from experiencing more our ideas about things to experiencing the actual things themselves, and they turn out to be full of strange beauty
goes on to talk about how in his tradition, people have started off doing breath practice, just as they are in ours.
Because because the breath practice has the potential to bring us to a state in which body and mind no longer experienced as too and this really brings us face to face with life itself. As oneness of body and mind.
But to come back to the prison does not mean being carried away by what is happening in the present.
We observe life deeply and stay in touch with the present moment and see all the sufferings in the wonders of the present. Yet we must do so in mindfulness, maintaining a high degree of awareness in order not to be carried away by all caught in desire for or aversion to what is happening in the present. Courts verse about the practitioner dwelling and stability and freedom These refer to the contentment and contract quality of not being carried away by anything whatsoever. Because can we can also get carried away by our desire clinging tightly to our goals these are just the durability and freedom are two characteristics of nirvana a some coupon and a some Hero a some coupon means unwavering. This is the stability one unwavering, unshakable immovable unexcitable or Firm A sum Hyrum means literally not folded together not restrained, not collected not carried away by anything this we have in our vision freedom not folded together as interesting maybe it's like like when we we make a first something hard and tight about it
not fitted as another one. In other words, not imprisoned. That's that's a time for us how to be free in the midst of all that we can't control. You can't troller health, we can give to the best to live healthy lives but there are no guarantees about how that will turn out.
Being in contact with the present moment
being in contact with life in the present moment, we observe deeply what is then we are able to see the impermanent and selfless nature of all that is. impermanence and selflessness are not negative aspects of life, but the very foundations on which life is built. Impermanence is the constant transformation of things, without impermanence that can be no life. selflessness is the independent nature interdependent nature of all things. Without interdependence, nothing could exist. Without the sun, the clouds and the earth the tulip could not be. We often feel sad about impermanence and selflessness of life, because we forget that without impermanence and selflessness, life cannot be to be aware of impermanence and selflessness does not take away the joy of being alive. On the contrary, it adds healthiness, stability and freedom. It is because people cannot see the impermanent and selfless nature of things that they suffer. They take what is impermanent, as permanent, and that what is self ruthless is having a self self. With one, the thing we can put our faith in is impermanence. You can be absolutely absolutely certain that anything compound at anything conditioned has only a certain life before it dissolves. Even even a terminal illness is not forever. It's terminal. Eventually, you either recover or you die.
Seeing deeply the impermanent nature of beautiful things, they transform formation and disappearance, the Buddha did not suffer will disappear. We to by observing deeply and seeing impermanence and selflessness in all that is, can come to can overcome despair and suffering, and experience the preciousness of the miracles of everyday life. A glass of clear water, a cool breeze, a step taken in ease and freedom. All these are wonderful things, although they are impermanent and selfless. They're ordinary things. Things that we experience in heaven our fingertips daily. But so often we miss
life is suffering. But it is also wonderful. Sickness, old age, death, accident, starvation, unemployment, and the natural disasters cannot be avoided in life. But if our understanding is deep, and our mind free, we can accept these things with tranquillity and the suffering will already really be greatly lessened. We're talking about this sincere shame that there's pain that just comes with having a body and a mind. And we we can't avoid those. But so often we add suffering on top and that we can have some control over. suffering becomes an the element which nourishes our love and compassion. And so we are not afraid of it. This is if we open ourselves to it. Our heart is filled with love and compassion, when we and we will act in ways to help relieve the sufferings of others. Some people are scared that if they open their hearts to suffering that then They'll become overwhelmed. It takes courage meant from something that Helen Wallace said. Suffering is the fuel of compassion, not the result. Suffering can can real light of flame
if the human species has been made able has been able to make any progress, it is because our heart of love and compassion, because of our heart and of love and compassion, we need to learn from compassionate beings, how to develop and practice deep observation for the sake of others, then others will be able to learn from us the way to live in the present and see the impermanent and selfless nature of all that is, this incident inside will lighten suffering.
Time is is almost up
just
this last this last passage here to practice a life of deep observation, according to the teachings of the Buddha is to have a life of peace, freedom and joy and to realize complete liberation. The knowing the better way to live alone gutter reminds us that we cannot avoid death and advises us to be diligent in the practice today. For Tomorrow it will be too late. Death comes unexpectedly and there is no way to bargain with it. If we live observing everything deeply in the present moment, we learn to live in peace and joy with freedom and stability. If we continue to practice diligently in this way, peace, joy and stability will grow every day until we realize complete liberation. When there is complete liberation, liberation, death can no longer harm us. A life like this will bring joy to our dear ones and to others. The material of stability and release is also the element of liberation. liberation is the fruit of deep observation, which leads to the realization of the impermanent and self nature. Selfless nature of all that is, by observing at a deep level, we can deflect defeat death, because the observation of impermanence can lead us to transcend the boundaries of birth and death. When we look at all that is in the universe, and all those dear to us, we see that there is nothing Central, eternal and unchanging that we can call eye or self. This is really living in what Blanca was talking about living in the unborn buddha mind. We'll stop here and recite before house.
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