2023-09-D3-DK: Teachings of American Zen teacher Joko Beck #1
1:47AM Oct 10, 2023
Speakers:
Dhara Kowal
Keywords:
zen
life
practice
work
mind
joko
roshi
intimacy
gap
enlightenment
years
feel
close
moment
object
seeking
sheen
enlightened
find
zen center
This is the third day of this September 2023, seven day sesshin.
Previously, we explored a couple of Chan masters from the Song Dynasty, which was a major period in the development of Zen as we practice it today. Today we're going to shift to the writings of 20th century American Zen teacher Charlotte Joko Beck.
Although this is a completely different time period, and cultural setting, the fundamental teaching is the same.
Actually, perhaps what's what's different today is that there's greater attention given to lay or householder practice. And also, we have new ways to talk about the human mind and how it functions. The field of psychology as an area of study didn't begin until the 1850s in Europe. It's a modern invention. And it transformed the way we talk about the mind. We now have a mental map and a whole language a whole set of terms for understanding how the mind functions differently from the brain. The physical stuff inside our skull. For example, we talk about there being a conscious, subconscious and unconscious mind
whereas the brain is physical. You can see it you can poke at it and dissect it stored away in a jar but the mind is invisible. Where is it? What is it
I'm going to read from what has become a contemporary classic text. Every day Zen love and work by JOCO back. It was published in 1989. And she did go by the name Joka. First, a few words about her life. And this is from an excerpt of an obituary notice that was published in the publication lion's roar. Joko Beck was born in New Jersey in 1917 and died in 2011. She studied music at the Oberlin Conservatory of Music and work for some time as a pianist and a piano teacher. She married and raised a family of four children. Then separated from her husband and worked as a teacher, a secretary and an assistant in a university department. She she began Zen practice in her 40s with ties on my zoomy Roshi, from whom she received Dharma transmission. She also worked with on two other prominent teachers for a period of time. Yasutani Roshi, who was Roshi Kapleau OHS primary teacher and she also worked with so on Nakagawa Roshi.
And then this obit continues. It says she was a founder in 1983, of the Zen Center of San Diego, and in 1995, of the ordinary mind Zen school, through her teachings and her work as the author of two modern Zen classics, everyday Zen and nothing special. JOCO became a very visible and widely admired force among the first generation of America's convert Buddhists. And in that she was somewhat of a pioneer as a female teacher. And, in addition to those two books that were published during her lifetime, there was a third that came out posthumously in 2021, just a couple of years ago. It's a collection of unpublished talks that her daughter put together. And that one's titled ordinary wonder. When I, when I first started at the Zen Center in the late 1990s, the first book I read was Roshi Kapleau has three pillars. And the second was Joko Beck's everyday ism. So, we'll start from the beginning with the first chapter, which is entitled, beginnings in practice.
She says, my dog doesn't worry about the meaning of life. She may worry if she doesn't get her breakfast. But she doesn't sit around worrying about whether she will get fulfilled or liberated or enlightened. As long as she gets some food and a little affection, her life is fine. But we human beings are not like dogs. We have self centered minds, which get us into plenty of trouble. If we do not come to understand the error in the way we think our self awareness, which is our greatest blessing is also our downfall.
It's so true that dogs are great role models for practice. They live totally in the moment. They don't see themselves as lacking anything. They don't see themselves as downtrodden even when they're tired or sick
they don't ruminate about the past. They don't plan the future although they do seem to have a internal clock of some kind, or when they know when it's treat time.
They Don't wallow in regret or guilt or feel shame. They don't hold grudges
and they're pretty good at concentration as well. Especially when it comes to chasing after something. My partner Tom and I used used to have to rescue greyhounds they were magnificent. Previously, you know they had lived lives as racing dogs. And so they spent their days Chase thing after mechanical rabbits. And we don't know what their lives were like in the racing track environment. We don't know what they experienced there. But it was definitely in their nature to chase after things. And as a condition of adopting them, we actually had to sign a paper saying that we would never allow them to be off leash unless in an enclosed space so whenever we opened the back door of our house, into the fenced in yard, they would just run full throttle. They would set their sights on something, it could be a leaf, a squirrel and there was no trying to call them off there was no gap
and for the cat people out there you know, we can say some similar things about cats. They don't ponder the meaning of life. They don't strive for attainment they're present completely and no mindedly they look their butts, they don't care what others think. They don't compare themselves to others. They sleep much of the day. They don't have to prove anything.
And as for Zen, if you've ever seen a cat lying down, appearing to be sleeping, near its body totally relax. It's I eyes either closed or you know kind of unfocused. Doesn't look like they're doing anything. And yet, if you look at their ears, their ears, you're totally alert, totally in tune with any sound.
This combination of being relaxed and attentive is what we're working on in doing this practice, moment by moment.
And yet, we humans tend to complicate things by living through living our lives through the filter of thoughts.
All right back to JOCO. She says to some degree we all find life difficult, perplexing and oppressive. Even when it goes well as it may for a time we worry that it probably won't keep on that way.
We might might have that worry during so sheen around goes well? Will I be able to sustain it? Depending on our personal history, we arrive at adulthood with very mixed feelings about this life. If I were to tell you that your life is already perfect, whole and complete, just as it is, you would think I was crazy. Nobody believes their life is perfect. And yet there is something within each of us that basically knows. We are boundless, limitless. We are caught in the contradiction of finding life. A rather perplexing puzzle, which causes us a lot of misery. And at the same time, being dimly You're aware of the boundless, limitless nature of life. So we began looking for an answer to the puzzle.
Yeah, we do seem to treat life as if it's a puzzle. You can imagine, all the times, you've found yourself feeling uncertain and looking for a resolution? Should I get a new job? Or not? Should I move to a new place? Should I get involved in a relationship?
Should I join the Zen centers training program? Should I leave it? On and on. We wrap our brains over these kinds of questions. And think that once we got it all figured out, once we put the pieces of the puzzle together, then we'll find happiness.
But then we discover doesn't work that way. Sure, you know, some change in routine or lifestyle can be worthwhile and even necessary, depending on the circumstances. But if we think that's what's going to bring us lasting happiness, that's delusion.
Basically, the one thing that causes us to suffer is our clinging to duality. And no amount of attempting to change, control or maneuver around our situation is going to address that. And the pain that comes from it.
JOCO says, the first way of looking is to seek a solution outside ourselves. At first, this may be on a very ordinary level. There are many people in the world who feel that if only they had a bigger car, a nicer house, better vacations, a more understanding boss or a more interesting partner, then their life would work. We all go through that. Slowly, we were out most of our if only nice. If I only had this or that, then my life would work. Not one of us isn't to some degree, still wearing out our if only he's
finally, in looking for the thing outside of ourselves, that we hope is going to complete us we turn to a spiritual discipline. Unfortunately, we tend to bring into this search the same orientation as before. Most people who come to the Zen Center don't think a Cadillac will do. But they think that enlightenment will. Now they've got a new cookie. A new knew, if only if only I could understand what realization is all about. I would be happy. If only I could have at least a little enlightenment experience. I would be happy. Coming into a practice like Zen. We bring our usual notions that we are going to get somewhere because enlightened, and get all the cookies that have eluded us in the past
we all want that cookie. It's why we come to such sheen over and over. Who wouldn't want to be enlightened it's not, it's not necessary to judge ourselves for having that aspiration. You know, for committing ourselves to uprooting delusion, that's not a problem.
But sooner or later as our practice matures, we come to see that we're clinging to it as a goal we make it into an object and then it becomes an obstruction
and on top of treating it as a goal, as an end result, we we might even set a timetable who want it now? Not later, ASAP.
gioco says our whole life consists of this little subject, looking outside itself for an object. But if you take something that is limited, like body and mind and look for something outside it, that something becomes an object and must be limited to. So you have something limited, looking for something limited. And you just ended up with more of the same folly that is made you miserable. We have all spent many years building up a conditioned view of life. There is me. And there is this thing out there that is either hurting me or pleasing me. We tend to run our whole life trying to avoid all that hurts or displeases us noticing the objects, people or situations that we think will will give us pain or pleasure avoiding one and pursuing the other. Without exception, we all do this. We remain separate from our life. Looking at it, analyzing it, judging it, seeking to answer the questions. What am I going to get out of it? Is it going to give me pleasure? Or comfort? Or should I run away from it? We do this from morning until night
does feel like a unending cycle doesn't it this seeking out a vain pursuits. In psychology, it's called hedonic adaptation. Once we get what we want, we feel happy and content for a short while. But then we move on to seeking out the next thing, the next greatest thing that's going to make us happy. And another phenomenon is that we might feel guilty or unworthy for doing something that we thought would make us happy. Like taking a vacation or buying a new car
So we're unhappy if we don't get what we want what we want. But we're also unhappy when we do get what we what we want. Where does that leave us?
Then Joko says, underneath our nice, friendly facades, there is great unease. If I were to scratch below the surface of anyone, I would find fear, pain and anxiety running amok. We all have ways to cover them up. We overeat over drink, overwork, we watch too much television. We are always doing something to cover up our basic existential anxiety. Some people live that way, until the day they die.
As the years go by, it gets worse and worse. What might not look so bad, when you are 25 looks awful. By the time you were 50. We all know people who might as well be dead, they have so contracted into their limited viewpoints that it is as pain is as painful for those around them as it is for themselves.
The flexibility and joy and flow of life are gone. And that rather grim possibility faces all of us. Unless we wake up to the fact that we need to work with our life. We need to practice we have to see through the mirage that there is an eye separate from that our practice is to close the gap only in that instant when we and the object become one can we see what our life is
close the gap
that's what we're doing. Each time we make that choice to return to our practice. Each time we've noticed that we've dropped it and return we're closing the gap
to close the gap is to become intimate with it. And it's the intimacy of not knowing.
Not knowing has nothing to do with ignorance or lacking knowledge. Rather, it's not holding on to any thoughts or feelings that arise letting them come and go all on their own. Not engaging with them. Not separating ourselves from life as it is in this one moment.
off off the mat or off our seat we can experience that intimacy with our practice in so many ways
the simple awareness of your hands resting in your lap
the awareness of your foot making contact with the floor as you get off the time
picking up a cup and pouring water into it
each and every second is an opportunity to merge with our practice
and it's it's really critical to keep our practice continuous in this way during break periods during Kean heen during all the transitional points of this machine schedule so we don't widen the gap and if we do widen it which we probably will, but when we do all we got to do is return our attention and then we close it one instance is all it takes to close the gap
Joko goes on enlightenment is not something you achieve it is the absence of something all your life you have been going forward after something pursuing some goal enlightenment is dropping all that. But to talk about it is of little use. The practice has to be done by each individual. There is no substitute. We can read about it until we are 1000 years old and it won't do a thing for us we all have to practice and we have to practice with all our might for the rest of our lives
we all have to do this work ourselves because there's no substitute for direct experience
words concepts thoughts, they remove us from the intimacy have this
the intimacy of not knowing.
What happens when we let life unfold moment by moment. Meeting it uniting with it right there
it's like the sense of wonder that one experiences as a stranger visiting some foreign land you don't know the landscape you don't know the language, the customs you don't know anything you're seeing everything for the first time
that's the kind of intimacy we want to cultivate with our practice
it's not it's not a one shot deal as much as we'd like it to be gotta commit to closing that gap over and over and over and over
again, that's the hard part of practice that effort giving to it over and over
by but each and every one of us is capable of doing it especially now at this point in sesshin. Thoughts are starting to settle Sure, they swirl around and they come and go at times, it might feel like you're overwhelmed by them. But that's just on the surface underneath that is break clarity
just gotta keep working at it. Keep Closing the Gap
not to get anywhere
but to be right here, right now.
Next, Joko says, what we really want is a natural life. Our lives are so unnatural. That to do a practice like Zen is extremely difficult. But once we begin to get a glimmer, that the problem in life is not outside ourselves, we have begun to walk down this path. Once that awakening starts, once we begin to see that life can be more open and joyful than we had ever thought possible. We want to practice we enter a discipline like Zen practice so that we can learn to live in a sane way. Zen is almost 1000 years old, and the kinks have been worked out of it. While it is not easy, it is not insane. It is down to earth and very practical. It is about our daily life. It is about working better in the office, raising our kids better and having better relationships. Having a more see mean and satisfying life must come out of a sane, balanced practice. What we want to do is to find some way of working with the basic insanity that exists because of our blindness. I'm reminded of that famous saying, Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting the same results or expecting different results rather. It's amazing how much time we can spend on autopilot, doing the same thing over and over. Same patterns. So painful. But we do need to notice those habit patterns, be aware of them
in order to move beyond them.
And so sheme presents the opportunity to do just that to break the patterns to disrupt our default mode. Whatever form that takes
if required requires us to simply let go of all our attempts to be in control. Stop our strategizing, planning and plotting maneuvering. It's amazing how we even with the structure of such sheen, we manage to do that we still find a way to stay in control.
Then she says it takes courage to sit well. Zen is not a discipline for everyone. We have to be willing to do something that is not easy. If we if we do it with patience and perseverance with the guidance of a good teacher, then gradually our life settles down becomes more balanced. Our emotions are not quite as dark domineering. As we sit, we find that the primary thing we must work with is our busy, chaotic mind. We are all caught up in a frantic thinking. And the problem in practice is to begin to bring that thinking into clarity and balance. When the mind becomes clear, and balanced, and is no longer caught by objects, there can be an opening. And for a second, we can realize who we really are. But sitting is not something that we do for a year or two with the idea of mastering it. Sitting is something we do for a lifetime. There is no end to the opening up that is possible for a human being. Eventually we see that we are the limitless boundless ground of the universe. Our job for the rest of our life is to open up into that immensity and to express it.
Having more and more contact with this reality always brings compassion for others and changes our daily life. We live differently, work differently relate to people differently. Zen is a lifelong practice. It isn't just sitting on a cushion for 30 to 40 minutes a day, or 10 or more hours Day as we're doing in machine our whole life becomes practice 24 hours a day. So that's that's the long view of practice. It's our life but there's also a short view and that's the immediacy, the intimacy of this one moment
