Hey, hey, welcome, welcome back. I hope that this moment in time finds you in a space where you can ground or uplift, or create a little bit of openness, maybe slowness for yourself little ease. And I hope that you have something comforting with you, that puts you at ease as you settle into this episode. The shit we're talking about today is the fact that your future well being depends on you tuning into yourself, and living in tune with yourself in developing a self awareness, right, checking in with yourself noticing what is going on, and then doing something about it. Now I understand that this as all of our conversations are, is a nuanced conversation, because there's a lot of shit going on in the world that we are all dealing with. And also affecting us differently based on our identities and how we walk through the world. And which, or how many of our identities are marginalized. And so please understand that that is does not, you know, fall to the wayside for me at all that is front and center, of course, from the way I move through the world as well. And so please know that this is not, you know, independent of all the shit that is wrong in our society, and all the ways that you know, well being, and wellness is not accessible to everyone. So I just want to name that. But regardless, or, and with all of that, this remains true. We must tune into ourselves, and we must live in tune with ourselves. And the thing of it is, we are not taught how to tune into ourselves from a young age, at least not here in the US. From my understanding, from a young age, think about it. If ever you fell when you were little 234 years old, if you can remember the back that that far, or maybe you know people who have raised kids, or maybe you're a teacher, you've been around I'm using children as an example. Because not that you have to have children because that's not an expectation in my mind. What happens if a child falls, oftentimes an adult will say, you're okay, it's okay. And basically makes the decision for the child that it's okay. Sometimes you might see the child kind of process that moment where they're having an experience, that they're not sure of what happened, maybe sometimes things are a little shocking, right? If you fall unexpectedly, or something happens unexpectedly. And sometimes we want to cry, sometimes we want to scream out. But imagine you're trying to process and then someone tells you, you're okay. You're okay, you're okay, you're okay. dusted off, shake it off. He doesn't really give you the space to actually finish processing what was going on? And because it usually comes from somebody who you trust, then you're like, okay, then I must be okay. Because this person who I trust told me so. Now, I understand that, you know, it's good intentioned, right, of course. But it takes away the agency of that person, even if that person is just two or three years old. Because the reality is, we are practicing or should be practicing agency and autonomy over ourselves from from a young age from the beginning, right, that's why babies cry when they have to communicate. And you have to figure things out. You know, like, I would guess also animals are the same way. Dogs are the same way, right? Where they can't communicate, but you're trying to figure out what's going on with them and they're telling you in the ways that they can without being able to verbalize but what happens is with this type of behavior and so many other situations that have nothing to do with children or childhood you know, we are basically taught to look outside of ourselves for information about ourselves. We are taught to bypass ourselves and thus even it ends up to gaslight ourselves when the what we're experiencing, you know, doesn't fall in line with what culture, culture or society dominant culture says is normal, or good or Right? Right. So often we are put in timeout, if we are upset about something or mad about something you may not have grown up in that, in that era of timeouts, maybe your caregivers response to you being upset or angry or even sad, was something else. And so, I, you know, we are not taught how to deal with our emotions, you know, how to cope with them, and even not even just cope with them, but how do we experience them. And we also are not taught how to get information from ourselves and do something about it, right, because if we're tired, we have to still go to school, if we're not feeling well, we still have to go to school, you know, all of these things. And again, this is very surface, very general. But there are tons of other examples that I could give that I don't want to take up a lot of time to. And that's all harmful, because we then take these, these practices, these coping mechanisms with us into adulthood. So when I talk about tuning into ourselves, whether that is to a one on one client, or I am giving a talk somewhere or I'm leading a workshop, people express how difficult it is for them to tune into themselves, not just tune in really what they mean is actually meet themselves where they are. Because oftentimes, we are experiencing that we are tired, we are experiencing that we are hungry, we are experiencing that we need to go to the bathroom, we are experiencing that something's not quite right, we are experiencing, we need some rest, we are experiencing that. We need a hug. We are experiencing so many things that we are not giving to ourselves in the moment because we are too busy. Go Go going, doing the responsibilities, taking care of others, and taking care of ourselves when we can if we can, right if we're lucky enough to have access to resources, and support. But what we're seeing is it's not enough. Right? It's not enough. And the effects of bypassing and also gaslighting ourselves are enormous, and far reaching and deeply, you know, rooted. What we really need to do is tune in and live in tune with ourselves. Understand, you know where we are and what we need. Create boundaries around what does not serve us. And also what does so we can do more of what does. We need to understand how white supremacy, culture capitalism, cultural conditioning, old traumas are showing up all over our self care and our relationship with self care. It's important for us to understand also our energy, our natural energy and our energetic needs, and how all of that is impacted by the season. We also need to rest more because often we're calling for rest, and we are just ignoring that. And so something you've been hearing me say a lot in past episodes is, you know, understanding how nature is affecting you, of tuning into yourself and understanding how you are feeling day to day and what your needs are and how that shifts. And so one of our Vedas, guiding principles is living in tune with nature. And that is nature outside the door as well as your nature because we all have one, right we all have an energetic dominance that either allows us to be calm, steady, may be slow moving may be resistant to change, or allow and also have great immunity. That's Kapha energy, more Pitta energy, those people who are fiery, who are passionate who are quote unquote, go getters who maybe are very witty and quick witted.
These people also may be prone to anger and criticism. Prone to fevers even or like yeah, I'll stop there. And then people who are more vata dominant, they may be creative people, people who problem solved pretty easily who maybe also are easily ungrounded or unsettled, who may be often have either headaches or digestive issues. So there is a dominant energy within all of us maybe even two dominant energies that kind of an all of these energies govern as you as I'm sure you've heard me talk about our physiology, our physical characteristics, our likes and our dislikes, our personality traits, that governs everything. And it's really important to understand what your energetic dominance is and how to live in balance with that, because the you know, the pace of our day, our responsibilities, the hardships, we face, the stress, as well as the energy of the season can cause us to be out of balance to live out of balance, and therefore then be at ill at ease. Right dis ease as in like, not at ease, or develop diseases, right conditions that are unwell. And so it's really important to to understand your components, what your characteristics are. And this is something that I work with one on one clients on identifying. Because knowing that helps us to really hone in on the practices that are beneficial for you, how to balance how to recognize when you're not in balance, how to maintain balance. Living into with nature, in terms of an Ayurvedic lifestyle also is living in tune with the natural rhythms of the day, thinking like sun and moon cycles, and thinking along the lines of how the energy of morning is different from midday, which is also different from the evening time having a well timed schedule with intentional actions to create that harmony, and then feeding your senses and engaging in hobbies. And this also means to that, you know, understanding, as I said, how the season affects you, honoring your needs, both in terms of energy, and you know, how your energetic nature is as well as the desires you have. And also and most importantly, living in alignment with yourself as best as you can with tools to support you. But not just for coping, but for thriving in balance, because oftentimes, I mean, I can't, I can only speak for myself and people who I speak to clients and things like that, I don't know about you. But I know that there are many people out there who are feeling like they are just hanging on by a thread that they are flying by the seat of their pants, when it comes to self care, their wellness, their well being they don't have the bandwidth, or the capacity or the resources to actively support themselves the way they want to. So it's important to figure out how you can write now let's talk about daily rhythm, because I love to talk about the ways that you can start to build these practices in a way that is sustainable. And remember, slow and steady wins the race small starts right now, when it comes to a daily rhythm, the purpose of this is to you know, because the body is full of rhythms, right you have a waking rhythm, you have a sleep rhythm. There there is a also a process to all of the different cycles and and processes that your body goes through. And there's a you know, this daily rhythm kind of functions like you know, music does, right, when you hear the rhythm of the music, that's what you move to, that's what you tap your foot to or nod your head too. And it's soothing in a way. And so what happens is when you have a rhythm for your day, it's something that you can begin to rely on that way when stuff goes out of whack. And so some people will say but Steff, if I'm in a routine that is so rigid, that what happens when things you know, go Alright, well the thing about iron betta is is is it gives a foundation, but it's it also is flexible. So that way, if you end up having a late lunch, you can know how to get yourself back on track for dinner, everything else doesn't then fly out the window just because of one bump or even one massive bump. You have the foundation to get yourself back on track that day, the next day, a week from now a month from now, you don't always have to start from scratch again. And so in terms of the daily rhythm, you've probably heard me talk about this before that's waking at or by six o'clock in the morning with the sun using that kind of transition period from the early morning hours where things are kind of mobile, allowing that energy to kind of propel you out of bed and get started with, you know, some self love practices a morning ritual practices, and allowing yourself time and space, whether that is three minutes, or 30 minutes or somewhere in between of self love rituals. And a morning routine is such an important part of your daily rhythm, it sets the two tone for the day, and also helps you to ground into yourself. So that way, if you are Go Go going through the day, you have a practice of grounding yourself to come back to the next day. And also typically whatever good we do for ourselves, whatever supportive stuff we do for ourselves, we tend to do more supportive things, we tend to build on that it tends to not just be a one and done situation, right, because it feels good. So we want to do more of that for ourselves. And so the morning may be a great time for you to do dry brushing or oil massage, it may be it is a wonderful time to drink warm water or room temperature water. Doing breath work. If it's a cool morning, because we're in springtime, then it might be a warming breath, when it starts to get warmer and maybe a cooling breath. You can move your body through yoga asana, or exercise, and maybe even do nasiha oil within the nose. And that is, you know, when you take that herbs, oil within the, within the nose nostrils, to lubricate them and act as a little bit of a barrier for the spring irritants. And what's really important about your morning routine is notice how you're feeling. You know, dominant cultures want culture wants us to do the same thing every single day, in the name of consistency. But the reality is, you may wake up tomorrow not want to journal you may not want to exercise you may not want to, you know, do whatever it is that you had planned. And so either you can force yourself, you know, and that might not harm you in any way. Or you can decide to adjust things, maybe it's a shorter workout, maybe it's a different workout, maybe you you know, you alter something in some way, you know, buy time or focus, right and just do things a little bit differently, maybe you decide you're gonna do it another point of the day, and decide to do something else that feels a little bit more soothing, uplifting or spacious, but depending on what it is that you need, right. The daily rhythm may also include you eating breakfast between seven and 8am. You know, working on projects that require endurance of your mind, between six and 10am, using that coffee energy to support you, you might have a snack between nine and 10am. And then your greatest productivity is going to be between 10 and two because of the fact that that's when Pitta energy is highest. So the bulk of your work is going to happen during that time, usually, and you might be like, Ah, this kind of goes against American culture. And it does, right like, because we just try to go with all and out intensity no matter what part of the day it is. But the reality is using the energy of the day, because the energy out in nature goes through a cycle throughout the day. And so tapping into that is really important. Lunch is going to be between 12 and one snack maybe between two and three. And then creative projects, tackling problems between two and 6pm. Using the vitae energy to support you there, you might have dinner between 530 and seven, and then start your evening wind down rituals made exercise during that time, you may start to prep for the next day. So you know, somewhere between the hours of six and 10pm, you know, stepping away from work stuff and then asleep for the springtime, somewhere between 11pm and 12am. And so I'm curious, you know, as we pause here, what is coming up for you that you're like, Hmm, this is a shift that might be supportive for me this spring, you know that I've been noticing that I really you know, I've been hearing from myself that I really need this particular action. Maybe this is an invitation to do it.
Another really supportive thing that you can do for yourself as you live in tune with your nature is that practice of strengthening your digestive power, which is another Ayurvedic guiding principle. And that really focuses on not just ensuring that you are digesting food but digesting experiences that you are allowing yourself to limit the amount of inflammation that occurs within your body, thus promoting more ease and softness. Right. Well being a feeling of being well, and a lot of this centers on pausing throughout the day, slowing the pace just a little bit softening that intensity, right like that, you know, fist clenching intensity that we have like sometimes not we I shouldn't say like that sometimes is present. Maybe not For you always that in maintaining that gogogo capitalism, white supremacy, culture mentality, right? So infusing self love acts throughout the day, intentionally pausing throughout the day. And also, maybe even adjusting your meal so that your biggest meal of the day is lunchtime, versus the American typical American culture practice of having a bigger dinner, maybe you skip lunch altogether. And so even just having a meal at lunchtime is gonna be a big deal for you. So these are ways where you can ensure that by the time it's, you know, as you you eat the meals during the, you know, these designated time periods, you're allowing space for digestion, you're allowing to be yourself to be fully digested before the next meal. You are also if you're eating dinner between 530 and seven, most nights, you're allowing yourself to be fully digested by the time you go to bed between 11 and 12, during the spring, 10 o'clock at night in some other parts of the year. And that's really important because your body goes through really important processing digestive cell regeneration, cell rejuvenation processes during the night, that if you're trying to digest food at the same time, it kind of interrupts all that. And so strengthening your digestive fire around the ability to let the systems do their work within you, uninterrupted, uninhibited. And also just softening that intensity, which allows you to not over rev the engine is going to be really important. Now, my friend, I'm wondering, you know, what's coming up for you in this reflection in this teaching? How have you noticed in the, you know, conversation or living into with nature and strengthening your digestive power? You know, are you noticing some calls that your being is making, maybe they're not new ones, maybe it's something that has been being called upon you, but maybe you are ignoring it. Maybe you're noticing some asks some shifts some alerts from your being, and maybe begin to wonder how often you're bypassing or gaslighting yourself. And then I encourage you to spend some time considering Excuse me, how will you move forward now with awareness, intention, compassion, and grace, while amplifying self love? Even further or more uncomfortable inquiry? Do you believe how you want to feel as possible? Do you feel resourced to start or continue this journey you're on for yourself care and well being? What if you didn't have to figure it all out or do it all on your own? Because we can often feel like we are by ourselves? I know I do. And I know other people who I've worked with, you know, people who've been in space with me, I've often said that too. And I don't know if you notice about me, but not too long ago, I felt like I was drowning in burnout, in grief and unhealed trauma and overwhelmed with trying and failing to keep up with society systems. But the difference maker for me that really changed my life. And I hate saying that phrase changed my life because it sounds like it sounds coercive, it sounds fake. But honestly, centering self love practices that brought me back to myself that honored my needs, my needs, my bandwidth, my capacity, have completely changed the way I show up in life, the way I connect with others, the way I enjoy my life and the impact that I have. But this process, right of centering self love of coming back to myself, this was a process. And it came from a really like the lowest and hardest time of my life. I think I've probably shared on multiple platforms, it's on my website on the about page. In 2019, I left my full time job to save my sanity. And because I also felt a very deep calling to use my gifts in a different way. At that time, I had been battling grief over the loss of a loved one unexpectedly and tragically for about a year or so two years up until that point, and prior to that prior to losing that loved one. I was so unwell in every day in every way in every day from working a demanding job in a toxic environment. And my bandwidth was stretched stretched so thin with two young kids in a society that you know, doesn't give parents enough space and time to adjust them to the newness of having kids or recovery time for birthing parents. And don't get me to start on the cost of childcare on top of you You know, the standards for you being a partner, especially if you identify as being a wife, who might be sis and, and I assigned female at birth, you know, like just all of the crushing responsibilities, I was really struggling before I left my job. And with all of that, but I also realized after that that a big part of the issue was that I was having a turn of term of terms of my bandwidth was all the years of unprocessed trauma from discrimination based on my skin color, and the gender I was assigned at birth. And then I was still experiencing all of that came to a head, my container was full, having my kids the state of my working environment, losing my loved one. So suddenly, there was zero capacity to hold all of that. And so all of the advice that like Time heals and motherhood is tough. All that bullshit was not helping. And I couldn't understand why I felt like I was completely alone because no one else was talking about what I was experiencing day in and day out. And so finally, I found professionals that didn't dismiss me, I went back to my yoga practice, not just practicing asana, pranayama, and meditation on a regular basis, you know, and that look different every day. But also tuning back into myself, of using these practices as a way to amplify what my body was saying about centering that conversation, and beginning to center these practices that I had learned in my IRA trainings, to begin the process of healing. To begin a process of it, it was a slow journey, I'm still on it. Right. And I needed the space and time to to heal when I wasn't trying to survive everything else. In the last couple of years, I entered into spaces that center social justice, and I learned so I've learned so much from people like Tristan Katz, and Michelle Cassandra Johnson, and realizing how I had actually been gaslighting myself and bypassing myself so much in order to cope. And as I unpacked all of this, as I unpacked all of this, I was like holy shit, if I don't realize how I am gaslighting myself how I'm bypassing myself how I am upholding the systems that are keeping me unwell. How many other people must not be doing that? How many other people must not be aware of how they are gaslighting themselves and upholding the systems. How many people are out there working their ass off at home, at work in their communities always on always connected, always supporting, always aiming for perfection, working harder than they actually need to pushing through sickness, feelings of unwell and burnout. Piecing together self care when they have can hang on to the next opportunity comes for them to care for themselves. But it's not working because this way of life pushes you further away from being resource connected and happy and leaves you there with very little for yourself and then also upholds the very systems that are designed to fail you and that you are trying to dismantle in your everyday life of being a disrupter. Right,
we know that the world we live in right now is so hard. And we cannot keep bypassing ourselves. We cannot keep gaslighting ourselves because we will continue to be drained. So my friend I created the holistic self care collective as an act of disruption in the fitness and wellness industry. This mentorship program centers personalized self care coaching as the foundation of the program, not a diet plan, not a workout plan. It centers what you're experiencing your energetic needs and how you want to feel as well as your lifestyle bandwidth and capacity. And as an as an Ayurvedic yoga specialist, I'm trained to understand your individual needs. To help you create a routine of intentional lifestyle practices that align with your needs and help you achieve the mental, emotional, physical and energetic well being that you desire. We start with a personalized self care plan. We work together over the course of 12 weeks. To identify practices for you. We identify old and limiting beliefs that are holding you back and work through mindset. mindset shifts to sustain you on your journey. We meet one on one and you also have access to email coaching and all of the support of the collective which is oh my gosh, live stream classes, weekly recorded practices, community gatherings if you want them, my friend you can find out more about this program at Steff gallante.com/collective and the link is in the show notes as well. I created this place because it was the place I so desperately needed. And I figured I couldn't be the Only person. And so I hope you'll check it out. And please reach out with any questions. Until next time, my friend, live in tune with your nature. Strengthen your digestive power by maybe slowing down and pausing a little bit more. Reflect on those questions I asked. Right and keep reflecting on them. And don't be afraid if you don't not getting some answers right away or maybe you don't want to do with the answers that are coming. Right just sit with it, give yourself space around it. And until next time my friend Please be kind to yourself just the way you would to those who are most precious to you. Whether that's a human and animal baby or a plant I would love to hear your thoughts and support as always about anything I shared with within this episode so please feel free to reach out and share it with me and if you've been loving the show, please share it with your nearest and dearest and leave a review or rating my friend you are a badass you are enough. Now go and be your favorite self and be well
