So hello everyone and continuing now for the second talk on the series on stories. And using story as an acronym, yesterday was discussing the source story. Today, it's trapping stories, the stories that keep us trapped in some of the source stories, some of the fundamental baseline stories that we live by, that we've learned inherited, it is are, sometimes are debilitating, they're kind of super get trapped in them. And, and sometimes staying in the labyrinth in the maze of some of these stories, thinking there's a way out by thinking our way out, somehow the very foundation or they're the the underlying belief for the story, the frame of reference for the story, there's no way out, there's nothing that we can do. It just spinning, spinning and spinning ourselves. So the some stories that trap us are sometimes called a rumination, rumination is said to be one of the leading causes of depression, we tell ourselves a story about ourselves in the world over and over again. And sometimes it can be a self fulfilling prophecy. This is why it's kind of a trap. Because we can tell ourselves, you know, one way or the other how terrible we are, you know, kind of self critical thoughts undermining thoughts, and the, and then that produces kind of depressing feelings, sadness, anger, despair, discouragement. And those feelings, then become the proof that the story is true. And then we tell the story again. And then the same kind of despairing feelings appeared, again, to be proof that this is what's true. We tell ourselves a story that the world is a frightening place. And we see the world through the lens of our fear. And because of that, we see things which are frightening. Sometimes we projected onto things. Sometimes there are real world fears out there. But that's all we see. And because we see fear, it reinforces the belief, the story that everyone's out to get me everyone, everything's terrible, everything's gonna fall apart, there's no no hope here. And, and the stories that are trapped, so the ones where somehow some of them are self fulfilling. Some of them the very story predisposes us to have that experience. That we're very thing that we're afraid of, or the very things we're angry about. Anger, that I've seen people who have a lot of anger, and are ready to be angry at people. And then people are, and they say, people are disrespectful, people are not kind, but they show up angry. And so people then step back or hesitate to be with them, or maybe are not so friendly with them. And so they don't see how the very anger that they're living by is fulfilling this is reinforcing the story or confirming the story or, or creating the story that is called created the anger to begin with. So it's a vicious cycle that goes on the the stories we have about self, that we have to be successful, maybe we've learned from our family that how important it is to be successful. And there are people who are conventionally successful, but it's never enough. There's always someone to compare oneself to or some fear about, well, what about if this situation happens and this situation happens? And so there's fear builds up that there can be never be enough, and sometimes in this never enoughness in Buddhism, these kinds of people are called Hungry Ghosts. Hungry Ghosts are a mythological creature in Buddhism, that has a very big belly,
but has a long neck. That's the throat is is thinner than us. straw, very, very small, thin. And so no matter how much you personally hungry ghosts can't eat enough food to satiate, that the big belly they have. So they're always hungry, always wanting more always searching for more wanting, wanting. And, and so the story. And I was that little bit when I was in my very early 20s, I had almost no money and traveling around and spent a lot of time being hungry and, and. And so when I finally came across food, I gorged myself on it, and then took a while for me to overcome my kind of the strong, gorging quality of eating unhealthily when I could. And because this feeling of a hungry ghost, there's never enough, there's enough, I have to have more, I have to have more. And some of the stories we tell about ourselves, the idea that, that we know that various stories of conceit, self esteem, proving ourselves as being somewhat important ideas that were undesirable ideas that were unworthy. All these ideas of self have within them, the very the source of them are the heart of these stories, is a fiction, something that doesn't really exist, this identity, the strong identity, the strong sense of this is who I am, no one is, this is who I am. As soon as we get locked onto this kind of idea, it becomes a story that is built on a lack built on an emptiness built on a fragile kind of basis. And something in our psyche knows that. And so it becomes this very, very idea that gets in the way of that reinforces it. So no matter how much the self is built up, is always going to be this lack always going to be this fragility in the middle of it, that's going to be searching and reaching and wanting more and proving more, getting more. So we live in these stories, we live in these ideas and beliefs about things, which are can be traps. And how do we and they can be like, I think of them as a Gordian knots, this huge, powerful big knot. That was a puzzle in the ancient world, and, and that whoever could, you know, release the knot would win a prize or something. And the legend goes that Alexander the Great came upon this big knot, and he took out his sword. And just rather than figuring out how to untie the knot, he just sliced it in half. So coming from a whole different perspective, rather than getting caught in the knot and tried to sort it out and figure everything out. Buddhist practice also steps away and brings a very different approach. And sometimes it's called the sword of wisdom, which can be as simple as lovingly kindly, putting down the story. Putting down the stories and interpretations and reactions we have to things. And just to and, and to experience ourselves. Without the without thoughts without being focused or centered on the thoughts that tell us a story about what's happening. Without using thoughts as the medium through which we're going to understand the what's happening. It's not an easy thing to do. But doesn't necessarily mean we have to put stop thinking. It just we stopped centering ourselves or trusting the thoughts or participating in those thoughts. And instead, to be present for our experience here. And now as it actually is. And if there's a feeling of lack or feeling of hunger, wanting more, then the task is just to sit with that breathe with that. Whatever it is to learn art, not an easy art, the art of just sitting with it, breathing with it, feeling it
free of story, free of the imposition, the projections of ideas and judgments and criticisms and self and free from this worry that it needs to be different. And this is the sword that cuts through the Gordian knot, the knot of arced entangled stories that we get trapped in and caught in and, and lost in. So in this practice, we start becoming sensitized to the stories, the projections, the ideas the mind lives by the quieter we can become in meditation or mindfulness, the more we stay stands out in the highlight the stories that we have. Seeing those stories, doesn't mean we have yet to have wisdom about them, doesn't necessarily mean that we can put them aside or not be under their influence. But that's the beginning is to see that these are the stories that I'm trapped in. And, and that's the beginning of finding the way out. That's the beginning of putting a question mark, at the end of the story says, Is this really true? To add? Maybe not, maybe there is another way? Maybe there's a way? Or maybe there's another story? Maybe the story I had been telling myself is debilitating. Maybe the story I'm telling myself and live by? Never has any conclusion? Is there a better story, and that'll be the topic for tomorrow. They aren't good stories. There are stories that lead to the end of stories, they're stories that open us to our life. But for now, for today, I invite you to consider what stories are you trapped by? What stories do you get caught in over and over and over again, that you live by maybe you've been living with for decades. And it might be related to a real narrative or real story event story that happened and you the source story or early story that then the lesson of that that you took from that you still live with this is how the world is this is how people are and and you're trapped in that view and that idea, but the resulting from some story that happened to you. And can you see how the trap is can you see the way that it's has no way out or that it's self reinforcing? Self confirming. So take time to look because if what I'm saying here today, I don't think has much value unless you be able to see it for yourself how it works for you. So maybe you have a friend you can talk to about it. Maybe exploring this topic with a friend about the stories you might be trapped in might be one way of kind of revealing a little bit more and then tomorrow we'll we'll go towards stories that open openness Thank you
